My So Called Life, Afterlife
by Ladydragon Guinevere
Summary: This fic --consisting of 14 episodes-- picks up where the show left off. All my separately posted episodes are gathered in this story, sorry for the confusion.
1. Episode 20: Words Don't Come Easy

_This fic picks up the storyline the morning after the last episode._

Thanks to: Kenny for doing the beta!

**Episode 20: Words Don't Come Easy**

Wide awake, Angela lies in bed, staring at the ceiling.

_Angela VO: "Last night I had the__ dream I kept having about Jordan Catalano again. I'm trying to catch up with him. But it's hard, because there's something wrong with the floor. Sometimes my father is there. Sometimes my great-aunt Gertrude's funeral kinda gets mixed in with it. I catch up with Jordan. I yell and scream, how he hurt and betrayed me. How I can never forgive him. Only this time, the end of the dream is different--__Brian__ Krakow appears out of nowhere, holding up the letter he wrote for Jordan, and asks me to marry him. Then I wake up." _

[In the kitchen]

Absent-minded again, Angela walks into the kitchen, still wearing her peejays.

Patty says, "So, Angela. Did you and Jordan straighten things out? You were home rather quickly again last night."

Angela startles from her thoughts. "Huh?"

Danielle grins."Are you and Jordan kissing again…?!"

"Danielle! Shut up!" Angela calms down a bit and continues, "I'm not sure…" She flicks a lock of hair behind her ear, pondering, and leaves the kitchen again. Closing herself off from any further conversation.

_Angela VO:__"Did we straighten things out? Can I really forgive him for what he did to me? For having sex with my best friend, and giving me an apology-letter he didn't even write himself? And to top it all off, he refuses to have a real conversation with me._

_And what about Brian? I never realised he had a crush on me. Is it my introspectiveness that shuts my eyes from reality, or does my obsession __with __Jordan Catalano blind me __from__ the *world*?"_

Patty watches her eldest daughter leave the kitchen. "It's so ironic to see your daughter relive your life…"

Graham answers, "You're not talking about that Tony-guy, are you?"

"Well, it's just… Even though talking to Jordan last night made me realize he really *does* care for her, and he never meant to hurt her… I still have my doubts. I can definitely see why she likes him, but I know it's not going to be easy to be his girlfriend. And by the looks of it, Angela hasn't just fallen in love with him, she has crashed… "

"Patty, it's her life. Let her follow her heart, just like you did all those many, many, *many* years ago--"

Patty laughs. "Easy on the 'manys' there, old man!"

Ignoring his wife's remark, Graham continues with sarcasm in his voice."And when she's through with Jordan Catalano, becoming aware that he has nothing to offer her but big blue puppy-dog-eyes and an old car, she'll come to her senses. Then she will find herself a sensible young man, just like you did, all those many, many, *many* years ago." He wraps his arms around Patty's waist and leans his head on her shoulder.

Patty shakes her head and grins at his remark. "You know, sometimes I still wonder though…"

"Wonder about what, my dear?" Blind to Patty's attempt at luring him out of his cage, Graham presses his lips to Patty's neck.

"Whether I made the right choice or not…" Patty looks up at her husband and gives him a mischievous grin.

"I guess I'm gonna have to show you again then…" Graham spins Patty around so she's facing him, eyeing her with a predatory look. "You're *mine*, woman!" He chuckles quasi-evilly before he sinks his teeth into her neck.

[School hallway]

_Angela VO: "It's weird, knowing that the most beautiful letter you ever received, wasn't written by the person you *want* it to be from. Should you keep pretending anyway, knowing that this person isn't capable of expressing himself through words that well? Or should you confront him? Does it really matter, in the end?_

"_And to complicate things even more, do you confront the *actual* writer of the letter, because you know that the feelings on that precious piece of paper are his? Ignoring his feelings doesn't seem like the right thing to do. Then again, shattering his dreams is like totally and utterly cruel as well… It's like having to choose between ignorance and defeat.__Is ignorance indeed bliss? Or is it better to know the truth, and move on?"_

From a safe distance, Angela watches Rickie and Brian engage in a conversation, while they stand by their lockers. Both guys are looking over at Jordan Catalano, no doubt with mixed feelings. Angela can almost hear their entire conversation and tries to maintain her invisibility while eavesdropping.

Rickie talks unsteadily while keeping his eyes fixed on Jordan. "So Brian, um, did you tell Angela the truth already? 'Cause--you know--she's a smart girl, and um, she may have figured out already who really wrote the letter."

Brians eyes only flick away briefly from Jordan as he answers Rickie in a harsh tone. "She came up to me yesterday and asked me if *I* wrote the letter! So, why did you have to tell her I wrote the damn thing?!"

Rickie is hesitant. "I felt, um, as her friend, and also, as your friend... she needed to know the truth."

"Yeah well, I can't tell her the truth. She doesn't even acknowledge my existence! She either uses me, or ignores me."

"But what if you did tell her the truth? You've got nothing to lose, right? She already suspects you wrote it, so…"

Brian replies sarcastically, "Yeah, and maybe she'll dump Jordan Catalano and run off with me instead. Besides, I promised Catalano I'd help him, so now I have to suffer the consequences. It disgusts me beyond belief to see her swooning over this shallow-minded pretty boy, but it's my own doing…"

"You know, maybe you should like, stop feeling sorry for yourself and go talk to Angela. She has a right to know, you know."

Brian gets fierce. "She's not dumb Rickie, she knows! Besides, I'd rather kill myself than declare my love for her. She doesn't care about me, at all. She cares about *one* thing, and that's Jordan Catalano over there." His eyes point at Jordan instead of his fingers.

They walk away from their lockers, Brian still glaring at Jordan Catalano, who is leaning against the walls, totally unaware of being the topic of their conversation. Seemingly unaware of almost everything that is happening around him, for that matter.

Giving up her invisibility, Angela watches Rickie and Brian disappear out of her sight.

_Angela VO: "I__ hate to admit it, but Brian may be like, right… No matter how many letters he would write to me, Jordan Catalano is the only one I really care for… Brian__,__ he's just… like, *Brian*. I never eyed him as a potential love or __anything__. So what's the point of talking to him anyway? He knows the truth, apparently. _

_I gave him a chance to tell me how he feels about me, but he passed it up. He won't admit it to me, so what am I supposed to? Am I supposed to keep chasing after him, and embarras him by letting him confess to me that he has feelings for me? And then embarrassing him even more by crushing his heart, because I am not going to answer his feelings anyway?" _

From across the hallway Angela's eyes meet Jordan's for a moment. Both of them seem to tell entire tales with just their eyes, yet neither one speaks with their mouth. Why is it so hard to be in love? Why won't Jordan talk to her, like, *actually* talk?

[At the restaurant place]

Graham walks in, and finds Hallie sitting on the ledge of the mermaid-statue. There's an awkward silence between them, broken only by Graham's, "Hey…"

"Graham… About last night…"

"It didn't mean anything, did it? Tell me it was just one of those awkward moments between a man and a woman--"

"Yeah, just a spur of the moment thing, it didn't mean anything, I just got caught up in the thrill of the excitement of our achievement. I was just happy that we succeeded, and obviously I am fond of you, but that's it!"

"Because Hallie, if there is something more going on here, I need to know. We're going to be partners, we're gonna work together, side by side, day and night…"

Getting up from the mermaids-statue, Hallie wanders around the restaurant for a few moments. Her eyes are fixed to the floor while she searches for the right words. Suddenly, her pacing comes to a halt and her eyes seek out Graham's. "I promise you Graham, there's nothing more to this. Nothing at all. I just enjoy your company, and well, let's face it, that's a good thing, since we're going to be working together, side by side, day and night…" A mischievous grin accompanies Graham's quote.

Graham's eyes are having trouble staying fixed to Hallie's intense stare. He can't help but feel she's covering up her true feelings by turning this into one big joke. A gut feeling tells him she's not being totally honest, but he refuses to express his suspiscions to her. "Good, good, I just needed to clear the air, since, well, you know…"

"I know, Graham. I promise, I want nothing more from you than your fantastic cooking skills." She nudges him in his side.

[In the school hallways]

_Angela VO: "It's like, whenever you want to run into someone, you won't see them, ever. But as soon as you want to avoid someone, they're everywhere! It's probably like some unwritten law of the __universe__. Here I am, like, trying to avoid Jordan Catalano because of my mixed-up emotions, and yet I can't seem to escape him anywhere. It's like he's stalking me or something. Those piercing blue eyes haunt me everywhere, not giving me a moment's rest to clear my head of all my thoughts on him…" _

Angela pretends to be busy stuffing books in her locker, hoping Jordan won't notice her. It's times like these that make her bummed out about dying her hair Crimson red. Why can't her hair be like a *normal* colour, so Jordan won't notice it's her and stop harassing her! Unfortunately Jordan has spotted Angela and is coming over to her. "Angela!"

She puts a lock of red hair behind her ear. "Hey…"

Angela was hoping yesterday evening's drive was going to clear the air between Jordan and her. She was hoping he would strike up a conversation with her, about the letter. About his feelings, maybe. But not a single word came from his mouth. After a while of listening to the silence, only interrupted by Jordan's breaths, she was sick of it and asked him to take her back home. He granted her request and drove her home, continuing the silence. When they had reached her house she was on the brink of addressing him, she was *so* ready to shout out at him that he had to talk to her, but chose to bite her tongue instead, leaving Jordan alone with his thoughts. If he had any, of course.

Angela feels numb, she's so tired of thinking and waiting around for Jordan to take action.

"So, what's up?" Jordan's hands are tucked in his pockets.

The bell rings for the second time.

"Jordan, I…" Angela turns around halfway. "Don't you think we need to talk about what happened?"

"Dunno, I just thought, with the letter and all…" Jordan's eyes are fixated on the floor instead of on Angela's face.

"Look,I'm late for class. I've gotta go, sorry." Angela closes her locker-door with a bang and her eyes seem to ask Jordan:_Why__ a__re you still here, in my way? _Careful not to let her body brush against Jordan's, she slips past him, leaving Jordan behind feeling very uncomfortable.

_Angela VO: "I have seen Jordan Catalano walk away from me so many times, that I could recognize him just by looking at his backside. All this time I have wanted him to walk u__p to me,__ but now__I want him to ignore me, so I don't have to think about him, or about what he did. But I can't keep pushing him away forever. _

"_I need to face my problems, just as much as he needs to face them. We need to talk about everything, because if we can't do that, we won't have a future. And if __*we* don't have a future then *I* won't have a future, because living without Jordan Catalano, is like living without air. He's like an addiction to me, I can't quit him… I will die without him…"_

[In the girls restroom]

Sharon carefully asks Rayanne, "So, I heard Angela and Jordan kinda made up… Does this mean she's forgiven him?"

"I guess…" Acting like she doesn't care, Rayanne raises her shoulders, putting the lollipop back in her mouth.

"So… Where does that leave you?" Sharon observes Rayanne's face for any feelings.

"Dunno." From various angles, Rayanne checks her face in the mirror.

"I mean, it's not like I condone what you did to her, but I mean--if she can forgive Jordan--why not you?"

"Beats me. You know, she's still ignoring me and when she's not doing that, she's giving me the silent treatment. I gotta face it… it's the end of Angela and me…" Rayanne gets agitated.

"Have you like, tried talking to her?" Sharon can't believe there's no fixing this; after all, she made up with Angela in the end too.

Rayanne answers briskly, "Yeah, like I told you, Cherski, that's kinda hard if she pretends I'm invisible."

"What if like, you ask her to come to the play? She's the one who insisted you'd audition in the first place…"

Rayanne cocks her eyebrow at Sharon. "Yeah, but that was like *before* I… um…"

"Look, it'd be great if we could hang together, right? So, promise me you'll try?" Sharon's eyes beg Rayanne to make another effort.

"Whatever…" Rayanne leaves the girls' bathroom, Sharon following shortly after.

[After school]

Outside, just where Angela expected him to be, Jordan is leaning against his car. Her heart skips a beat at the sight of him and her face can't seem to suppress a smile. His fingers hold up a cigarette stub just inches away from his face, while his lips blow out tiny streamers of smoke. She has decided it's time to give Jordan one more chance to talk to her, to tell her the truth. "Hey."

Jordan looks up, smiling faintly. "Hey."

"So…" Angela eyes Jordan hopefully.

"So…" Jordan flicks the stub away and tucks his hands in his pockets uncomfortably.

Angela tries to get Jordan to talk to her by asking him another question: "So, what's new?"

"Nothing much… You want a ride home?" Before Angela has the chance to answer him, Jordan opens the door to his car to let Angela in, apparently expecting she'll come with him.

Angela gets in, shifting back and forth on the cold leather of the seat. Jordan slides down next to her, his face displaying no emotion, just a blank stare. He doesn't say a word during the entire drive to Angela's place.

_Angela VO: "It is so weird, that despite everything that has happened lately, nothing has changed. Everything is different, __but__ everything is the same. Did I suddenly expect Jordan Catalano to pour his heart out to me? Did I really expect to have deep, meaningful conversations with him all of a sudden? _

_The only thing that has changed__, is that now I *think* he cares about me. But I'll never now for sure, if he can't find the words to tell me by himself. And no matter how badly I want him to tell me honestly that he did *not* write that letter, does it really matter that much?"_

_Angela VO: "Looking into my heart tells me I do want him to confess about the letter. I want to hear he is sorry, in his__ own words, formed by his own lips. No matter how poorly chosen those words may be, they will be *his* words. And that will be my evidence that __Jordan__ Catalano really cares for me, even if he did something very hurtful to me..." _

In front of the Chase's house, Jordan pulls his car over. His blue eyes are staring at her all open, his lips are displaying a faint smile.

"So…" Angela looks down at her hands, lying in her lap.

"So…"

"I'd better go inside, I've got like tons of homework to do." Lying through her teeth, Angela can't bear to sit here in silence for another minute.

"Yeah, okay. I've got like, band rehearsal later, so."

Angela answers distantly, "Bye then…"

Slowly, Jordan leans in to kiss Angela, but she turns her head away from him. "We need to talk, Jordan. We need to talk about what happened, and we need to talk about the letter you wrote me."

Jordan shifts in his seat extremely uncomfortably. "Like, now?"

"Like, now, yes. Just... tell me how you feel."

Jordan's hands grab hold of the steering wheel. "Ooh, this sucks. You *know* I'm like, bad with words!"

"Just give it your best shot, I'm all ears. I don't care how you tell me, just *tell* me." Angela is inexorable. This is his shot, if he blows this conversation she doubts they will ever get back together. If he can't express his feelings to her now, he will never be able to do so.

"Look, I never meant… I didn't wanna hurt you or anything. It just happened, I guess. I mean, she was like, there, and I felt…" Jordan's eyes are shut again, like he can think better that way. "I felt like, lonely, I guess. And I like, had way too much to drink, you know. It's not like I even *like* her, or anything. Not like I like you anyway." Jordan slouches in his seat, awaiting Angela's reaction.

"I know you never meant for it to happen. And I know you never meant to hurt me either. Otherwise we wouldn't even be *here* right now, having this conversation." Angela gives Jordan a sympathetic look.

"Look, I'm like, sorry it happened, okay? I'm like, sorry, I hurt you." Jordan feels totally exhausted from all the thinking and talking, his fingers are rubbing his eyes.

"Thank you, Jordan, it means a lot to me to finally hear you say those words. And thank you for like, finally giving me the chance to forgive you. Because you hurt me really bad, you know? And I like, wanted you to tell me in your *own* words that you are sorry, not in some stupid letter!" Angela's lips start to quiver, but she gets a grip on herself and continues, "You didn't write the letter yourself, did you?"

"What makes you think--? I mean…" Jordan's tongue flicks over his lips.

"I know you, remember? I know you didn't write those words, they're just not like, *you*."

"Come on Angela, does it like, really matter *who* wrote them?"

"It matters to me." Angela looks at him expectantly.

"Okay, okay. So, they like, weren't totally my words. But I wanted them to be. And I like, tried to tell you, but it was, like, you wouldn't listen." The eyelids that were covering up his blue eyes, flap open in a second. Some sort of piercing blue conviction is added to his words instantly.

"You tried to tell me? I must have missed that bit then. So, tell me, did you try to write something yourself?" Her anger is slightly subsiding, but still bubbling underneath the surface.

"Yeah, I tried. But it was, like, I had so many thoughts…" Jordan pauses. "My head was like, this big mess."

"So, you let someone else think of your words for you? And *who* would you entrust with that job?" Angela tries to maintain her distance, to let him feel the seriousness of the situation.

"Brain. He like knew, what was in my head, or something. Yeah, he um, he like, knew what I wanted to say." Jordan's eyes express agony. He doesn't like being forced to think things through and talk about them.

"So you asked Brian to like, write the letter for you?" Angela tries to look incredulous, one eyebrow cocked at him. Ofcourse, she already knows Brian wrote it, but she wants to know how it happened that way. Did Brian like, offer, to do it, or did Jordan ask him?

"Well, sorta, I guess. I mean, we were like, in tutoring, and um, my head, just wasn't in it, you know? So, I told him I blew it and he like, suggested I write it down. And um, somehow he ended up writing it, like, for me." Jordan's hands emphasize certain parts of his words.

"Look, I already know that Brian wrote it. Rickie told me. But it still doesn't make it right, you know. I would have been more satisfied with a letter that *you* wrote, from your heart." Her posture betrays her feelings for him. She can't keep him at a distance for long, because hurting him was never the point of this talk.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. But it's like, the things he wrote, actually came from me, I just…" He looks at Angela pleadingly, his eyes begging her to stop this interrogation. His words come out the wrong way, but his expression clearly states his true feelings.

His voice becomes hoarse, "I was like, afraid, if I said like, the wrong things to you, I'd lose you like, forever."

The breaking of Jordan's heart is almost audible in the silence after this confession. Crumbling, Angela lets him near her heart again, but she needs to finish this conversation first; before she gets lost in his eyes again, or smothered in his kisses.

"Winning my trust back, has nothing to do with like, how well-chosen your words are. What matters is that you let me know you're *sorry*. I don't care if you're a poet or not, I like you. Just be *you*, okay?" She reaches out and lays a hand on his sleeve, her fingers kneading his fore-arm through the fabric of his jacket.

Jordan's eyes stray to Angela's hand and then stare right back at her. "I'm sorry, Angela. I guess, I like, could have known that…"

"I forgive you. You know, if you had written just the words 'I'm sorry' in a letter, you still would have enchanted me into thinking it was the most beautiful thing I'd ever read." Her fingertips brush gently over his cheek, making Jordan shut his eyes.

"Neah, I don't believe you."

"Believe me. Oh, you have no idea how happy I am we finally had a chance to talk this over. It was weighing on me like a ton of bricks."

_Angela VO: "__Finally, Jordan and I talked things over, and I can forgive him. He apologized to me and admitted to not writing the letter himself. I don't think I've heard him talk this much, ever. I got everything I wanted and more, but something keeps gnawing on my mind, not giving me the chance to enjoy being around Jordan fully yet. _

_It's like, every single time I am in Jordan's car, I think about him and Rayanne having sex, here in his car. During the silent drives we've had the last few days, I've had plenty of time to envision the two of them going at it, nauseating me. I'm just not completely ready yet, to pick up where we left off."_

Angela's face is becoming worried. "I still need some time, Jordan. Whenever I'm in your car, it's like… I just can't--"

"Whatever…I just thought, you know… We were like, okay now." Nervously, Jordan puts his hair behind his ear.

"We are, I mean, I forgive you, but being in here, makes me kinda nauseous sometimes, because I know--" Angela's eyes implore understanding from Jordan.

"Yeah, I get it, I guess. But I'm *not* getting rid of Red, if that's like, what you're asking me to--"

Angela interrupts him, giving him a compassionate look, "No, no, I wouldn't want you to like, give up your car for me, don't be crazy! I'm just asking you for some time, because I'm reminded of it, like, constantly."

"I'll do like, whatever it takes, for you, like, to trust me again. Time is fine, I'll give you time." His eyes still show he's not completely at ease. He knows he's close to having her back again, but the damage he did still has to been undone.

"Thanks, Jordan. I was hoping you'd understand. Let's just take things slow, okay?"

_Angela VO: "__It's like Jordan is eyeing me differently now. The old Jordan wouldn't give me any time, he practically *forced* me to do something I wasn't ready to do yet. And when I didn't want to do it, he just gave up on me. But now, Jordan has changed. I think he realises what I mean to him, and he isn't going to give me up just like that. He said so himself, he __doesn't__ want to lose me again." _

"Yeah, slow is good." It's like Jordan is afraid to move, afraid of Angela's reaction.

Leaning in to kiss him again, Angela's lips softly brush over his, pressure building. Their lips get hungry for more, eagerly tasting each other. Jordan's hands curl in Angela's hair, drawing her closer to him. Their kiss deepens and their tongues participate in the exploration. Angela's hands wander over Jordan's jacket, and end up tangled in his hair.

A smile washes over her face, making Jordan back out of their kiss, hoarsely questioning her, "What's up?"

"Nothing, I'm just happy, I guess." Angela rests her head on Jordan's shoulder, sniffing up his scent. He wraps an arm around her.

"Yeah, me too." Jordan's hand strokes her hair.

From the corner of her eye Angela sees Brian Krakow cycling circles on the street in front of his house. His eyes fixated on her and Jordan non-stop. "Jordan, I have to go." Angela entangles herself from their embrace and kisses Jordan once more. "Pick me up tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I'll be there. Bye." A faint smile graces Jordan's face.

"Bye, Jordan Catalano." Angela smiles and shifts over the seat. She gets out, and lingers on the sidewalk, watching Jordan's car turn into nothing more than a little dot on the horizon.

Like a hamster trapped in his tiny treadmill, Brian Krakow is still going in circles. Angela feels kinda sorry for him. "Hey…"

Brian cycles up to her, his circles ridden right before her nose, dizzying her slightly. "Hey Chase… So, you and Catalano back together again?"

Wanting to snap at him that it isn't any of his business, Angela she realises it kinda is. *He* wrote the letter that made her forgive him in the first place, even though the words turned out to be Brian's feelings… That must have been so hard on him.

So instead of snapping back something rude, she tells him the truth. "I guess so… I mean, we're taking things slow, for now."

Brian looks at her, incredulous. "So you really forgave him? After reading his letter, I mean."

Angela snaps at him, "His letter? Or yours, Brian?"

Brian's bicycle comes to a sudden stop right in front of Angela. "I already told you, I only corrected the spelling. I had nothing to do with the contents."

"Why won't you stop lying Krakow?" Angela drops her bag on the sidewalk and fixes her eyes onto Brian's.

"Would it like, make a difference then?" Brian's eyes are fixed to the floor, his shoe shoving back and forth a little pebble or something.

"I guess not. I know Jordan didn't write it. It won't change how I feel about him."

Brian mumbles in a low voice, "Despite what he did to you you still care for him… How pathetic is that…?"

Angela raises her voice at him. "You're calling me pathetic? Me? You are the one who writes letters for other people, living your life vicariously through them. You're afraid to admit you have feelings for me, and why? Because they're not like, scientifically proven or anything? Or is it because you're afraid of rejection? And not that it's any of your business, but yes, I do still love Jordan Catalano."

Brian replies angrily, "Maybe you're right, maybe I am pathetic. Apparently I am too busy helping other people get their lives together so there's no time left for *this* loser!" Brian points his index-finger at his chest and pauses for a while.

"And what do you expect, Chase, you've been ignoring me like, all through High School, you never even gave me a chance to tell you how I feel! It's like, you and me inhabit completely different solar systems nowadays! And I don't understand why you're dimwitted enough to wait around for Jordan Catalano to like, hurt you, again. He already proved once what an unreliable idiot he is. Can't you just forget him, and like, move on?"

"Don't you ever call him an unreliable idiot again!" Her finger points at Brian's face, dangerously close to his eye. "Sure, he's made a mistake, but at least now I know he's sorry. Unlike some other people, he has the *guts* to let me know I mean something to him. And like, forgetting Jordan Catalano is *not* an option, believe me, I've tried." Angela laughs sarcastically .

"And I guess I'm like, sorry for ignoring you, but you know, people like, change. Or at least, they're supposed to, you know? Besides, this is already the *second* chance I've given you to tell me how you feel, but you keep beating around the bush for some lame reason."

"Yeah, I can see you've changed, Chase, a lot, but it's not like, all good, you know? You think you're too cool to be seen with someone like me, I get it. And that's exactly why I'm not gonna tell you how I feel, because you don't even care about it. All you care about is Jordan Catalano and your oh-so-cool friends, you know, the backstabbing kind of friends. I don't fit in your life anymore. No matter how much I want it to be a lie, it's the truth."

After Brian finishes, Angela falls silent for a while. All the sentences that come to mind seem abundant and meaningless.

"I… um… Look, it's just, how life works out sometimes, you know? People like, change sometimes, whether you like it or not. People like, come and go, I guess. It's not that I don't care about you, I just…" Telling Brian she doesn't care for him like she does for Jordan, is harder than she expected. Surely he understands that she wants to make this thing with Jordan work.

"Yeah, I get it. You have trouble remembering who your *real* friends are. I'll try to stay out of your way from now on. Don't hate me when they turn on you and I tell you 'I told you so'. If it's alright with you, this 'person' is 'going' now."

"Whatever." Not in the mood to talk any further, Angela turns around abruptly, picking up her backpack.

Hopping back on his saddle, Brian watches Angela's silhouette disappear into her house before he cycles back home, heartbroken yet again.

**To be continued…**


	2. Episode 21: Religion and Regrets

**A/N: Thanks to Kenny for doing the beta!**

_Angela VO: "I am not raised religiously by my parents, __so basically__ I'm__ not sure whether I believe in this *God*, or whatever. So, is it like wrong to ask him for help now? To have him help me forget about what happened between my best friend and the boy I obsess about? To have him help me decide whether or not I should *really* give Jordan Catalano and Rayanne another chance? To have him help me stop my mom from embarrassing me all the time? To have him help me get through high school, in general?"_

[In the kitchen]

Graham says, "Patty, remember, I may be home late, because the workers are coming to the restaurant."

"That's right, I almost forgot! Oh Graham, I'm so thrilled your dream is finally beginning to take shape!" Smiling, Patty kisses him on the lips. "So, is Hallie going to be there too?"

"Of course, we're partners, so I guess that means she has *some* say in it too." Graham grins.

"Oh honey, I know that, but she still hasn't quit her actual job, has she? So I figured…"

"She won't be around all day, but she'll stop by during lunch and after work."

"Okay. I will make sure to be home on time then. If the chef's away boring old Mom will have to fix some dinner instead."

"If things get too late I might grab a bite on the way home or so. Thanks honey, for being so supportive."

"Your happiness is all that matters to me, you know that." Patty strokes her husband's face.

Danielle and Angela walk into the kitchen. Danielle makes a disgusted face and asks, "So *Mom* is cooking dinner tonight?"

"What's wrong with my cooking? I used to cook all the time before your father discovered his talent!" Patty looks at her youngest daughter incredulously.

"I know, it's just, it tastes better when Dad does it!"

Patty replies indignantly, "Why thank you, dear, for your support…"

"I'm just saying…" Danielle raises her shoulders and walks out of the kitchen.

Angela follows her example while mumbling to herself, "She's right…"

[School hallways]

Jordan approaches Brian who stands by his locker, getting out some books. "Brain, you like, gotta help me again!"

"I have helped you enough, Jordan." Brian doesn't feel the need to look at Jordan and just goes on with his business.

"You see, Angela, she's like, not sure yet, or something." Jordan eyes Brian with expectation.

"What's any of that got to do with *me*?" Brian pauses, holding up a book, giving Jordan a short stare.

"Well, you like, helped me last time, and it's like, so hard, to tell her stuff, you know?" Jordan has assumed his regular position, leaning against the surrounding lockers.

"You're such a terrific songwriter, write her a freaking song or something! You're not getting any more help from me."

Jordan falls silent for a while.

"I was kidding! You got that, right?" Brian can't believe Jordan's taking his advice seriously; he was just saying something to get rid of him.

"That's like… wow… Thanks, Brain!" Jordan takes off in his usual nonchalant manner, leaving Brian behind hating himself for putting this idea in Jordan's head.

The idea is so good, it might actually *work*. It might get Angela to totally forgive Jordan in the end, and who knows, even have sex with him. And the idea is so cool, that it's something Brian could never pull off. Sure, he can play two musical instruments, but somehow they're not the type of instruments that get girls to drool all over you…

He bangs his head into his locker several times and wonders what he has done wrong to deserve this punishment. He must have maddened God somehow…

[Girls' restroom]

Sharon and Rayanne are talking when Angela walks in, pretending not to see them.

Sharon nudges Rayanne in the side and mumbles: "Ask her!"

"So, Angela, are you coming to the play?" Rayanne fumbles with her hair.

Wondering if she should say anything to Rayanne, Angela stops and turns around. It only seems fair to give her a chance as well, since she's already forgiven Jordan.

Rayanne grows impatient while watching Angela's blank face. "Well? *You* wanted me to audition!"

"I'm not sure yet." Angela walks into the toilet stall.

_Angela VO: "How long can you stay mad at your best friend for hurting you? Especially when you have kind of forgiven the other person who hurt you along with __her__? How long can you stay mad at someone with a serious drinking problem? Someone who nearly *killed* herself because that problem? Someone who just uses people for sex, because she well, like, doesn't know any better?"_

Rayanne talks to the closed door of the stall. "It would mean a lot to me if you would come. Bring Catalano, if you like."

Sharon casts Rayanne a surprised look. Rayanne murmurs an almost inaudible "Shit!"-

Rayanne tries to talk over her remark. "I mean, not for me, obviously--"

Angela interrupts her from inside the stall, "I know what you mean, Rayanne."

Rayanne can't think of anything else to say to Angela any more. She's afraid Angela will get angry or something and decides not to stick around and wait for that to happen. She dashes out of the girls' restroom, mumbling something to Sharon on her way out.

Angela comes out of the stall, and Sharon says to her, "She didn't mean--"

"I know what she meant. But you're not on her side, are you?"

"No, no, of course I'm not. It's just, well, she's kinda my friend, and you're my friend too, so, it's difficult being in the middle."

"It's just, I know I forgave Jordan and all, but I just can't forget what she did, you know? Whenever I'm in Jordan's car, these images of them flash through my head, and they're like, making me *sick*…" Angela washes her hands vigorously, like that will make the visions imprinted on her brain go away as well.

"I totally get it. But like you just said, you've forgiven Jordan, right? So, maybe you should try to forgive Rayanne as well…"

"Yeah, I know. But I'm still not ready to forget the whole thing. Somehow it's harder for me to face Rayanne, than to face Jordan." Angela's hands shake off the excess water and wipe themselves dry on her flannel shorts, since paper towels are nowhere to be found again.

Sharon gets passionate. "Why is it so hard with friendships and relationships? Why is it so hard as soon as *sex* is involved? I mean, sex is just sex, right? What's the big deal?" She lifts up her arms to the heavens as if expecting an answer.

"To me it *is* a big deal. I love Jordan, and I loved Rayanne. I wasn't ready to have sex yet, so he dumped me and just went off and banged my best friend!"

"Wow, Angela, that's probably only like the second time I've seen you all worked up about it, instead of catatonic!"

"I know, it just hurts so much! It pisses me off! I still don't understand how they could do this to me!" A grim expression crosses Angela's face when she thinks of the betrayal.

"Well, they both didn't think it through... They never meant to hurt you, Angela, I know they didn't. Maybe they were just, lonely, and missing you, and the alcohol made them lose their senses. I know, they're all lame excuses, but who knows what made them do it!"

Angela leans against the bathroom wall. "I know they didn't mean to hurt me, but they did it anyway. And I wouldn't know about losing control after having too much alcohol, since I've never been drunk."

Sharon gets excited all of a sudden. "We could try it sometime? I mean, we could just go out and drink and have fun?"

"Sure. Whatever." Angela steps away from the wall and walks through the door; Sharon follows her into the hallway, both on their way to their next class.

[After school, drama room]

Enrique and Angela are quietly painting trees as Delia walks up to them.

"Hi Angela, hi Rickie." Delia smiles at Rickie, like a fool in love, and rocks her upper-body gently from left to right.

Angela and Rickie share a look and both answer her. "Hey…"

"So, Rickie, remember when you asked me to go to the movies?"

Rickie raises his eyebrow at her. "Umm, yeah…"

"How about tonight then? It's Friday night, so." Delia can't stop smiling.

Rickie's eyes follow the strokes of his paint-brush on the wooden tree as he answers, "I'd have to check with Mr Katimski first…"

"Oh, right, of course. Let me know then?" Delia hops up and down like a wind-up bunny with new batteries.

Rickie takes his eyes off the tree for a moment and smiles at Delia. "Sure thing, Delia."

"Okay, bye then Rickie!" Delia twirls off.

Leaning in, Angela says quietly,"She's really got it bad for you, doesn't she?"

"Yeah… It's a shame I'm not straight…" Rickie's eyes are fixed upon the tree again.

"So, do you *really* wanna go to the movies with her?" Angela can't imagine why Rickie would want to hang with Delia. She's totally not his type, regardless of her gender.

"We could hang, right? Like, friends?" Rickie's eyes seem to ask Angela for her approval.

"I guess so." Angela shrugs.

"I mean, she *knows* I'm not into girls, so…" Rickie stares at the tree without seeing it.

"No point in hurting her, but I mean, if she *knows*…"

When Corey walks in the room Angela averts her eyes. Her cheeks demonstrate a vibrant red colour immediately. She acted like a fool around him, trying to come on to him. She wasn't even interested in him that way, but she *knew* Rickie was. So technically she wasn't really any better than Rayanne or Jordan…

Corey greets them enthusiastically. "Hey you two!"

Angela keeps her eyes fixated on the tree, mumbling, "Hey."

"Hey you!" Rickie's face lights up at the sight of Corey.

"So, still working on the props?" Corey takes a look at the piece of wood that is beginning to look more and more like a tree.

"Yeah, I love being artistic! Playing with paint and all…" Rickie sways his paintbrush around nervously.

"You don't have to tell me… I have a love-affair with my paint, it's like the only steady factor in my life." Corey walks away, seemingly not aware of Rickie's eyes on his back.

"Why stick to paint, when you can like, have *me* as your steady factor?" Rickie looks away dreamily. "Just imagine…" Then the truth seems to hit him again. "Why does God send Delia to chase after me, and not like, Corey?"

"Rickie wants to be Corey's paintbrush, how romantic! And umm, I just don't think God's that much into the whole same-sex-thing…" Angela smirks.

"That's probably 'cause he never tried it!" Rickie raises his eyebrows.

"Have you…?"

"No, of course not, I mean--" Rickie's cheeks flush.

"Hey, come on! Our time will come!" Angela tries to comfort Rickie by reminding him of her own lack of experience. And how that can change overnight…

Rickie replies sadly, "Yours probably sooner than mine…"

"Don't say that!" Angela slaps Rickie's arm. "You will have your Corey, someday." Her arms wrap themselves around Rickie's neck and give him a hug. "If it can happen to me, it can happen to anyone." Sometimes she still can't believe Jordan is *hers*, and the thought makes her smile instantly.

[At the restaurant place]

Graham is supervising the workers and chipping in wherever he can. His overall is smudged with paint, just like his face and hair. The door opens and Hallie enters.

Graham puts aside his paintbrush and greets his partner. "Hey!"

"Hey. Sorry I'm late; you would not *believe* the traffic again! Every decent parking space was already taken again, of course. We're gonna have to get private spaces here, or we'll be late to our own opening hours!"

"Let's see if that's an option. Who knows? So, do you like what you see so far?" Graham smiles at her.

Hallie looks around, taking in the sight. "It's beginning to take shape, yeah! I can just imagine this restaurant filled to the brim with guests; maybe we could even have the fountain filled with champagne for our opening night! Wouldn't that be something?"

"You know, that actually sounds like fun! We shouldn't let Patty near it though…"

Hallie cocks an eyebrow. "Oh? Is she fond of a good drink every now and then?"

"Actually, she *never* drinks, but when she *does*…" Graham shakes his head when he recollects Patty's behaviour at the lodge, the other weekend.

"She's all *wild*?"

Graham answers light-heartedly, "Well, she's a lot looser then, and that's putting it mildly."

Hallie mumbles, "I'd like to see her not so stuck up for once…"

Graham walks up to her and replies fiercely, "What did you just say?"

"Nothing! What did you think I said?"

Graham reacts angrily, "I thought you called my wife stuck up!"

"Well, I may have said something along those lines…"

"You don't even know Patty that well! I am glad she's not such a big whirlwind like you, storming through life!"

"Well excuse me for not being Little Miss Perfect like your wife! Don't hold it against me or anything!" Hallie gestures wildly.

"I don't care if you're anything like her or not, I just won't let you call my wife stuck up! Patty can be very passionate and wild too, thank you!" Is Graham trying to convince himself or Hallie?

"Yeah, when she's drunk!" Hallie's voice squeaks with excitement.

Graham points his finger at her chest, walking over to her, causing Hallie to take a few steps back. "That's completely untrue! Our sex life happens to be very good, even after all these years! You can't even stay committed to one person, so what would you know!"

Hallie keeps walking further back as Graham closes her in. "I can't help it guys can't keep up with me! And if your sex life is so good, why is there so much tension between us…?"

Graham stops dead. "Tension? You mean these arguments?! And that one brief awkward moment we had?"

"That moment Graham, yes. That one, precious, moment."

"I have had it with you. There is *nothing* going on between us, and you know it. I am sick of listening to your fantasies." Graham stomps away and slams the door shut, the hammering sound echoing through Hallie's body like a drum.

She is left behind feeling ashamed, surrounded by the workers who got to hear every word of their argument and stare at her.

[After school, hallways]

Katimski walks past Rickie and stops him. "Enrique, ah, Enrique! Your guidance councillor just informed me that… um, well, you see, it's gonna take a few more weeks before there will be any opening at the Pride House. Yes, that's right."

Rickie looks slightly disappointed, but understanding. "Oh, okay. I like, hope it will be worth the wait. Ah well, it's not like I have anywhere else to go…"

"Gee whiz! You can still stay umm, with me as long as you need! No problem!"

"Thanks Mr Katimski. I really appreciate it. I'll be out of your way as soon as possible…"

Katimski's mind seems to have trouble focusing. "Gee whiz Enrique... don't you worry about it, no no no! You just go out and have some fun tonight, with your friends! Promise?" He waves Rickie away.

Rickie smiles at the absent-minded man before him. "Sure thing, Mr Katimski, I sort of had plans already anyway. I promise I won't be home late."

"Enrique, just enjoy yourself. And try not to worry so much!" Katimski pats Rickie's shoulder.

"Thanks Mr Katimski. For everything…" Rickie is grateful to him, for taking him in, no questions asked.

Rayanne walks up to Rickie from across the hall, having heard bits of their conversation. She tries to address Rickie several times, but seems to change her mind. She finally decides to strike up a conversation, "So, Rickie, going on a date?"

"Well, it's not really a date… So, what's up?"

Rayanne twists and turns her hands in front of her, answering, "I asked Angelica to come to the play, and she said she'd think about it."

Rickie's face lights up immediately. "So, she like, *spoke* to you? That's a step forward!" He would be so happy if he wasn't stuck in the middle any more, caught between his old friend, the betrayer; and his new friend, the betrayed.

"I guess…. So, how are things with her and Catalano then? I mean, I can see they're all kissing and smooching, but are things really okay again?" Rayanne wants to know her friend is okay, after what she did to her. She wants her to be happy, that's all.

"Why don't you ask her yourself?" Rickie's not quite sure he wants to discuss Angela with Rayanne, yet. He feels the need to protect Angela from Rayanne, knowing what she's capable of. Friend or no friend, she has never been an easy person to hang out with.

"We're not like *that* close… yet. I gave up that right when I screwed her over, I guess…" Sighing**, **Rayanne rests her head against her locker.

Rickie eyes Rayanne closely; her regrets aren't hidden to him. "Well, you're not the only one she blames, you know. She like, can't seem to forget totally what Jordan did to her. They are together again, yes, and they're in love, I guess, but it takes a while for the trust to come back, you know. And the letter he wrote her, you know, he didn't *write* it."

"Yeah, it's like, understandable, I guess. It'll like, take time. Oh and I think I kinda overheard that letter-part in the girls' restroom. Krakow wrote it, or something, right?" Rayanne seems to liven up now the attention is shifting from her to Brian.

"Right, the poor guy's got it bad for Angela! He like, seriously *hates* himself for writing the letter in Jordan's name." Rickie wonders if he hasn't told Rayanne too much already about Brian's feelings. She doesn't show any respect for him, and he doesn't want to betray Brian's trust.

Rayanne responds sarcastically, "Now there's a tough choice: Krakow or Catalano… I know who *I'd* pick…"

"Yeah, Rayanne, we know that already." Wondering if Rayanne realises what she just said, Rickie looks at her.

Rayanne flushes immediately. "I didn't mean it like that, and you know that. It was a mistake Rickie; you don't have to keep reminding me." As fast as humanly possible, Rayanne vanishes out of his sight. She's tired of being reminded of her mistake, she's tired of being judged by her friends, and she's tired of being alone…

[After school, outside]

Jordan is hanging around under the bleachers having a smoke with Shane, waiting for Angela. When he finally spots her he raises his voice, but not enough to sound uncool. "Angela!"

Shane thumps Jordan against his arm and takes off, his drumsticks clutched tightly in his hand.

When she hears Jordan's voice call out her name, Angela's heart rate speeds up. She reaches the bleachers and meets Jordan underneath them. "Hey…"

Sincere happiness beams from his eyes. His hands wrap themselves around her waist and draw her near. His lips eagerly seek hers out in a kiss, and are met enthusiastically by hers. They tease, taste and explore each others mouths, never lacking any passion.

_Angela VO: "Sometimes I miss our secret meetings in the boiler-room,__you know__--__just the whole sneaking-down-into-the-basement-to-make-out-thing, not the part where Jordan Catalano was actually *embarrassed* to be seen with me __in__ public. There's something so immensely thrilling about kissing in that forbidden and normally cold and abandoned place; and heating the atmosphere up by getting all hot and turned on, without ever getting caught. Maybe it's just because I have never been down there before, or maybe it's simply because I have never been really kissed before…__I don't know what it is, but it's like kinda kinky or something…_

_"__But I have to admit, being able to kiss Jordan Catalano out here in the open, is such a big improvement! I am so happy to be seen with him and so equally happy that he finally wants to be seen with *me* as well. But one of these days I'm definitely leaving him a note in his locker, to meet me in the boiler-room__.__" _

Jordan backs out of their kiss. He caresses Angela's cheek softly and locks his blue eyes onto hers, studying her expression. "I'm glad you came." His hand seeks out hers.

Angela enjoys the feeling of warmth caused by that little gesture washing over her; she puts a lock of hair behind her ear with her free hand and stares back at Jordan, amazed. "Why wouldn't I come? You asked me to meet you here, so…"

"Yeah, I know. I just thought, like, you wanted to take things slow, so." Jordan's eyes wander from their hands to her eyes again, somehow expecting them to take away his insecurity.

Angela can't get over how much Jordan has changed towards her. Here he is, looking at her so fragile. Like anything she will say to him can make or break him. She never knew there was so much sensitivity behind his cool posture. She could have guessed his attitude was merely to hide his insecurities, but now she can actually *see* it in his eyes.

"Taking things slow doesn't mean I won't hang out with you, or make out with you." She cups his face in her hands so it has no choice but to close in on hers, showing him she wants to be kissed by him, over and over again. "Now, was there a special reason you wanted me to come here, or was it just so you could kiss me again?" She gives him a smirk.

"No, no, not just for kissing." Jordan laughs a little. "I wanted to tell you, like, some good news. Our band landed a gig at this café."

"Wow, that's so cool! Good for you!" A proud feeling takes over Angela.

Jordan smiles shyly. "Yeah, I know. So, you umm, like, wanna come watch us play?"

"Sure, I wouldn't miss it for the world!"

_Angela VO: "__Sometimes, I still wonder how things __turned__ out like this. Sure, Jordan hurt me, but right now he's doing everything he can to make it up to me. In the past, when I would show up anywhere he happened to be, his reaction was always a big surprise. I've been ignored, kept a secret and even told I was like, crowding him. But right now, Jordan Catalano __is *asking* me__ to come and watch his band play, because he *wants* me to be there. I'd be like, stupid to turn him down now, you know? It's like, the nightmare is finally becoming a dream."_

"Okay, cool. I'll pick you up then."

"Okay, that's great! Oh, but, when is it?"

"It's this Saturday."

Angela wrinkles her nose. "Let me check with my parents first…"

"Just like, remind her of her old boyfriend."

"What? How do you know--? What do you mean--?" Angela's mouth hangs open, displaying her surprise.

_Angela VO: "__How does Jordan know about my mother's old boyfriend? Oh, wait, they must have talked about him, the other night. It's weird that my *mom* and Jordan Catalano had an actual conversation, not to mention one about my mother's old boyfriend. It's totally disturbing they share some sort of secret together I'm not in on…"_

"I just… she…. We talked. And I seem to remind her, like, of her old boyfriend, you know? He was like, a dangerous driver, or something." Jordan's perfect teeth show while he grins at Angela. "What?!"

"I still can't believe you had an actual conversation with my mom. What did you guys like, talk about? You know, she never told me anything. Then again, I didn't *ask* her." Angela keeps staring at Jordan.

_Angela__ VO: "I keep thinking of the conversation I should have had with my mom. I can't wait to get home and ask my mom what Jordan and she talked about, and why Jordan reminds her of her old boyfriend. Sure, I saw the pictures; and he looked cute, rode a bike and they were like *totally* crazy together. He makes Jordan look like a wimp, come to think of it."_

"She's like, not so bad. Your mom, I mean." The uncertainty shines through Jordan's eyes.

"I know… I guess."

_Angela VO: "So, maybe God was listening to me after all, and sent Jordan Catalano along so I could have like__, a *normal* relationship with my mom. Or, he sent Jordan Catalano to her, so my mom would see he's just like her old boyfriend. 'He works in mysterious ways__,__' that's like what they say about him, isn't it? That phrase is starting to make sense now…" _

"So, can you give me a ride home? I'm like *dying* to talk to her…" Angela holds on to Jordan's hand as she pulls him away from the bleachers, in the direction of his car.

Jordan walks alongside Angela and fixes his eyes onto hers. "Just tell her, I will, like, take good care of her daughter, you know."

Tying to express her happiness through words would never do justice to the feelings of complete bliss flowing through her entire body and soul right now; so instead Angela pours her entire being into the kiss she shares with Jordan. She can only hope the warmth and happiness he makes her feel will be transferred into his soul.

**To be continued…**


	3. Episode 22: Set Me Free

**A/N: Thanks to Kenny for doing the beta on this one!**

[Saturday morning, Angela's bedroom]

_Angela VO: "Tonight I am going to watch Jordan Catalano and his band perform again. __And __I have like *nothing* to wear. I never thought I would stoop this low. I like to think I'm not the shallow kind of girl who cares what other people think of her wardrobe. I don't want to pretend I am someone__ I'm__ not. Jordan Catalano will just have to accept me for who I am... So why is it, I have tried on like *8* different outfits already?"_

Looking at her outfit in the mirror, Angela spots her little sister in the reflection. "Danielle, get out of my room!"

"Danielle, get out of my room!" Danielle mimics her sister.

Angela turns around and raises her voice at Danielle. "I mean it!"

"Let me help you pick out your outfit, pleeeaaase?"

"Why?"

"'Cause you dress like…umm…a clown sometimes?!" Danielle bares her teeth in a silly grin.

A pair of socks, aimed at Danielle, soars through the room. "Ooh, thanks! Now beat it!"

Ducking away, Danielle continues, "No! I'm sorry, I mean, I want to help you pick a perfect combination!"

Cooling down, Angela shrugs. "Whatever. You may as well come on in, I have stooped to the lowest levels already anyway..."

Danielle skips into Angela's room and sits down at her sister's desk, picking up a perfume bottle and sniffing its scent.

"Danielle?" Angela cocks her eyebrow at her sister.

The bottle of perfume slides from Danielle's fingers, dropping to the table. She jumps out of the chair. "Well, let me see what you picked so far!"

Angela shows Danielle a few different outfits by holding them up, and with every outfit Danielle pulls her lip up in disapproval. Her sister has bad taste, in men *and* in clothing. Danielle walks up to Angela's closet and goes through her stuff. There's the red velvet dress which she wore to a school dance once. She holds it up to show to Angela. "I like this one very much… It's feminine, not like your other stuff…" She hesitates, eyeing her sister's reaction.

Sighing, Angela drops down on her bed. "He's already seen that, I can't wear it again!"

"I *doubt* Jordan Catalano will notice that, he's not like, that perceptive or anything."

"What? What do you mean by that?"

Danielle shrugs. "Nothing, he's just not the type of guy who cares how you dress, obviously."

Angela squints her eyes. "Something tells me you don't like him that much…"

"He's okay, but, well, he's not as smart as let's say… Brian Krakow…" Danielle sits down on the bed beside her sister.

"Thank God he doesn't *look* like Brian Krakow either…"

Danielle retorts arrogantly, "Well, that's *your* opinion!"

"Danielle, do you *like* Brian Krakow?!" Angela casts her little sister a surprised look. Isn't Danielle too young to be liking boys? And how come she never noticed Danielle's feelings for Brian before?

"What's not to like?"

"Don't get me started…"

Danielle crosses her arms in front of her chest. "Just shut up! I like him anyway! I don't understand why he likes *you*!"

Flicking a lock of hair behind her ear, Angela murmurs, "Me neither…"

_Angela VO: "There are moments I feel like, sorry for Brian Krakow, you know, for kinda breaking his heart by being his unanswered love__? __Because unfortunately__,__ I know what that feels like. It hurts like, so much, you don't think your life will ever be worth living again. But there's like, nothing I can do to change the way I feel about him or Jordan. Of all people, Brian should understand the laws of chemistry. Basically__,__ when it comes to love, the rules don't apply."_

[In Patty and Graham's bedroom]

Patty eyes her husband who is just awaking. "Good morning dear. I didn't hear you come home last night, everything okay?"

Graham rubs his eyes and puts his arms behind his head while staring at the ceiling. "Morning. Yeah, I'm fine; I went out for a few drinks afterwards."

Patty studies her husband's facial expression. "With Hallie?"

"No, I called Neil to join me."

"Oh, just like that?"

Graham answers sharply, "Yes, just like that."

Patty stops staring at her husband and lies on her side again. Graham is not yet in the mood to tell her anything, or, something *did* happen but he's afraid to tell her. She has known Graham a long time, so decides to give him a break. He will talk to her when he's ready. "Okay then Graham. Just one more thing: shouldn't you be at the restaurant today?"

"No."

"Aren't the workers going to be there today?" Patty turns her body towards Graham again.

"Yes, but Hallie can supervise them alone. I'm already there the entire week, so."

Patty rests her head on her hand. "I still think you should go over there and check it out."

Graham turns to face Patty abruptly. "Patty, I had an argument with that *woman* again and I don't want to see her right now!"

"What? Again? What has she done this time?" Patty knew it was a matter of time before Graham would spill his guts, just as she knew it was just a matter of time before Hallie and her husband would have a fight. She hopes for the love of God Camille wasn't right about Graham and Hallie…

"Doesn't matter, let's just say I've *had* it with her."

Patty leans in closer to Graham, her face displaying her worries. "Why won't you tell me what it was about?"

Graham looks at his wife, unaware of her thoughts. "Does it matter? We just need a break from each other, before I *kill* her with my bare hands and turn her into some new sauce."

"If it's that bad, I have a right to know, Graham!"

Graham leans on one elbow and hisses, "The argument was about *you*, okay?!"

"About me?" Patty's worries are increasing by the moment. Hallie and Graham fought about *her*! That can't be good, right? Her eyes beg Graham to release her from her insecurity.

Graham's eyes display surprise at his wife's worried face. "It's okay, honey. She said something about you I didn't like, and, well, things got out of hand."

Patty is still not totally satisfied with his answer. "Graham, are you *sure* it's safe to be opening a restaurant with her? I get the odd feeling she wants more than just your cooking skills…" There, she uttered her suspicions.

Graham's brows frown. "You know, I'm beginning to worry about that too. But do *her* feelings have to get in the way of my dreams?"

Her heart still not at ease, Patty understands her husband's feelings. "I guess not, honey, but if things go horribly wrong you end up with no dream whatsoever…"

[Sharon Cherski's place]

The doorbell rings and Camille answers it. Angela stands on the doorstep. Still unaware of what happened between Angela and Sharon, Camille's glad to see they're getting along again.

"Hi Angela! Did you come to see Sharon?" Camille hollers to the upstairs floor, "Sharon!"

Sharon comes running down the stairs and gives Angela a smile. "Hey Angela! What's up?"

"I've got a crisis…" Angela walks into the hallway and smiles at Sharon shyly.

Camille looks at Angela with surprise. Sharon in her turn looks at Angela, incredulous, and asks bluntly, "Another crisis?"

The two surprised faces staring at her make Angela chuckle; she ends their suffering with, "No, just a wardrobe crisis…"

Laughter fills the room. Sharon grabs Angela's hand and they run up the stairs together. Shaking her head, Camille walks back into the living room. She remembers being that age all too well. Not being able to find the right outfit for a date or party was a crisis indeed.

[In Sharon's room]

_Angela VO: "Sharon's room is still exactly the same as it was when we were kids and used to come up here to play with our Barbies. In a way that's comforting, but in another way, it's kinda freaky. Time has stood still in here, while Sharon definitely hasn't; she's playing with boys instead of dolls now. Whereas my room is like constantly changing, despite its unchanged purpose, I guess."_

"So, what's up?" Sharon eyes her friend with great interest.

An old toy Angela still recognizes from when they were little lingers in her hands. "You see, I'm going to this thing tonight, where Jordan Catalano's band is performing, and I don't have anything to wear."

Sharon leans closer to Angela and says, hushed, "So, you two are like, totally okay again?"

Angela crinkles her forehead while thinking. "Well, it's like, it's still kinda hard to forget the whole thing you know, so we decided to take things slow and all. Or at least, *I* decided that, but Jordan seems to be fine with it too, so."

"I know what you mean… Let him prove to you he's really *worth* it first. What he did was un-defendable! Hey, you want me to come along? That way you don't have to sit alone while Jordan's playing!"

"I'm not sure actually, 'cause this time Jordan really *asked* me to come, so I don't know if maybe he considers this like, a date or something?"

"Hmm, I know what you mean, tough one. Look, how about I'm just gonna come along anyway, so you won't be alone when he's on stage or anything. But… if he's gonna play a gig it can't really be a date, can it? Anyway, afterwards I can always disappear if you want me to, okay?"

"Yeah, I guess that would be okay. We can hang out while he's playing, and if he decides he wants to be alone with me, we can just like, leave, right?" Sharon's offer to come along eases Angela's mind a lot. She dreads sitting there all alone; maybe it's because of the nerves, or maybe it's because she's still afraid Jordan will change his mind or something.

"Okay, that's settled then! So, Chase-Face, what kind of outfit do you want to wear?" Sharon bounces through her room.

"I'm not sure, I wanna impress him. But I want to be *me*. And not me, too." Angela still wanders through the room.

"Let's just try some things, okay?" Sharon goes through her closet and picks out a few outfits for Angela to try on.

Looking down at her chest Angela sighs. "I *so* wish I had what *you* have… Just *look* at me, all flat up front…"

"You know, I am actually getting used to them too! It's still weird when people stare at my chest instead of me, but, you know, they lead to good things too! I mean, Kyle can't get enough of me!"

"Kyle *loves* you! How can you take advantage of him like that? Poor guy!" She plops down on Sharon's bed, chin resting on her hand.

Sharon chuckles at Angela's facial expression and drops down on her bed next to her friend. "I know, I know, I still have to tell him we're *really* through. But, in all fairness, I didn't tell him I love him, so technically I'm not lying!"

Angela shifts to her side and eyes Sharon closely. "So, you *really* just use him for sex…?"

Sharon wrinkles up her nose and laughs again. "I guess… Oh Angela, you don't know what you're missing out on! Sex is *amazing*!" She rolls on her back and stares into oblivion.

"I guess…" Angela follows her friend's example and gazes at the ceiling.

"You've got to believe me! I mean, you love Jordan, right? So, just *do* him!"

"Let's see if I can forget his stunt first…" Getting up, Angela tries on another outfit.

"Oh Angela! That's it! You look so *you*, and yet, so different! You look hot, Chase-Face!"

Giggling with shyness Angela turns her eyes back into the mirror again. Staring back at her is a young woman dressed in a red plaid mini skirt, black over-knee stockings, and a black satin haltertop. This is definitely the outfit she will be wearing tonight. Her laughter subsides when it occurs to her that this may be the outfit that will leave Jordan Catalano speechless. She giggles again though when she realises that is never a hard thing to do to him…

[At the Chase's House, evening]

_Angela VO: "I can't wait until Jordan comes to pick us up. It's like time has decided to move slower right now, in order to test me or something. It feels almost as lame as a __Sunday evening__ so far…"_

_"__I have a weird feeling about this evening; like it will make a difference, like something special is about to happen maybe. Somehow, I feel more ready to forget what happened between Jordan and Rayanne too, because I know I can't live without Jordan Catalano. I *need* him in my life, just as much as I need air." _

Angela catches her stare in the mirror again, wondering if she overdid it. Since, according to her little sister, Jordan isn't that perceptive anyway. Maybe her outfit is too much after all, her hair overdone by being partly curled (like the night he stood her up). Her lipstick and eye-shadow, are they too much as well? Will Jordan like her like this, this different, this mature?

Deciding she should stop gazing at her reflection and be satisfied with the way she looks, Angela startles at a timid knock on her bedroom door. "Come on in…"

"Wow, look at you, Angela! You look stunning!" Patty's mouth practically falls open at the sight of Angela as she walks into her daughter's room.

"You really think so?" Twisting and turning in front of the mirror, Angela watches her reflection from various angles.

"I *know* so! Oh honey!" Patty reaches out her hand to stroke Angela's face. She looks so mature; it scares her a bit, actually.

Curling up her nose Angela backs away. "Mom, you'll smudge my make-up."

"Oh, I see…" Disappointed, Patty retracts her hand and continues in a dim voice, "So, is Jordan picking you up?"

"Yeah, he's picking me and Sharon up." Angela falls down on the bed when a thought shoots through her. "Oh, Mom! I never got a chance to ask you what you and Jordan talked about." She looks up at her mother, her face displaying hope.

"Now you mention it, I don't think we ever did, did we?" Encouraged by Angela's question, Patty feels brave enough to sit down on the bed next to her daughter. "Well, let's see, we didn't really *talk* all that much. I mean, you know what he's like, don't you?"

"Yeah, I do." A smile spreads across Angela's face.

"He had some trouble finding the exact words to express himself, if I recall correctly. But it became very clear to me that he really likes you, Angela, and he never meant to hurt you. I have a feeling there's so much more to him than he lets on, you know?" Patty gives her daughter a warm smile. She remembers all too well the intense feeling of being in love for the first time.

"You really think he likes me? Why?" Angela's face radiates with happiness. Her mom is like, older and wiser, so when she sees these things, they must be true.

Patty frowns her brow in trying to recollect the exact words Jordan told her that evening. "Well, he said something like how he thought he was safe, and could walk away any time, because he didn't need you, or anyone else. But that he finally realised he was wrong about that."

Patty pauses and then adds her opinion. "It almost sounds to me like he's afraid to open up to you, because he's afraid of getting hurt."

Dreamily, Angela looks at her mother. "He said that? He really said that to you? That's like, so deep. God, he needs me, Jordan Catalano needs me!" She rolls on her back and stares at the ceiling, her eyes sparkling. "So, you think he just acts the way he does because he's afraid to get hurt?"

"Yes, I think so. I can't put my finger on it, but there's a whole world hidden underneath the surface of that boy." Patty can only imagine the pain Jordan must have been suffering and her maternal side is awakened at that realisation.

"Oh Mom, you have no idea! I'm just beginning to get to know him now, and he surprises me like *all* the time! Like, the other day, he told me to remind you of your old boyfriend… Now, what is that all about?" Angela rolls over facing her mother again, curious.

Patty's cheeks flush instantly. "Oh my, that boy has a good memory. You know, that's a long story, and--"

The ringing of the doorbell interrupts Patty, causing Angela to jump up from her bed and run towards her bedroom door. "Sorry, Mom, we'll talk about this some other time, okay?" She sprints down the stairs leaving her mother behind.

[At the café]

It's a busy evening; all over the café people are talking in little groups. Some of them have come to enjoy themselves by shooting pool, while others just want to have a drink to forget their sorrows, or simply have fun. Rock music plays in the background while clouds of smoke provide the entourage with a foggy haze, resembling some kind of smelly blanket, embracing them.

Jordan, Angela and Sharon look around the café, trying to find a spot. They linger near the bar for now.

Barely hiding his approval, Jordan eyes Angela closely. "You look different tonight…"

"Do I? How?"

"Dunno, just… different…" Jordan tucks his hair behind his ear.

"So, you like what you see?"

_Angela VO: "I don't know if it is my imagination, but I swear I can feel Jordan's eyes travel from my face to my neck, where they seem to linger. His stunning blue eyes glide down further over my body, over my chest, my waist, the plaid skirt, meanwhile __leaving goosebumps all over my body. His eyes stop at my legs, right underneath my skirt, where the bare skin disappears into my over-knees again. The way he looks at me turns me into some sort of quivering jelly. Right now, I would let him do *anything* to me…" _

"Yeah, you look, umm, well, just--" Jordan sounds hoarse.

"I look, what?" Sometimes it bums Angela out that Jordan can't find the right words to say to her. Can't he like, be normal, and just tell her she looks beautiful?! How hard can it be?

"Just, umm, cool, I guess." Jordan feels pressured to say something profound, but he can't--not with Angela's eyes fixed on him like that anyway.

"Yeah, I figured you'd say something like that…" Angela feels slightly disappointed. Then her mother's words pop back into her head, about him being afraid to open up to her. She decides to stop expecting him to transform overnight and changes the subject. "So, is it okay I brought Sharon along?"

"You know; whatever…" Jordan leans against the bar.

"I mean, while you're up there playing, I won't have to be alone, right?"

"Yeah, I guess." Jordan observes Sharon for a moment.

"She won't go home with me though. Her boyfr-- I mean, *ex*-boyfriend-- said he would stop by too, so."

"Okay…"

"So, Jordan, are you nervous?" Angela changes the topic again. Sometimes it's just so hard to talk to Jordan, it gets on her nerves.

"Kinda. I never thought my voice was like, good enough." Jordan smiles at her coyly.

"Are you kidding me? You have a *beautiful* voice!" She could listen to him singing all day long, every day of the week. His voice is so… sensual, so hoarse. Thinking about it just makes her shiver.

"Yeah, right…" Jordan smiles nervously.

"Seriously! You're gonna knock 'em dead tonight!"

"We didn't rehearse that much."

"You'll be fine, trust me!" Angela leans in on him, her arms wrapping around his waist, her hands meeting each other behind his back. Her full bodyweight crashes into him, letting him know there's no way out of her embrace.

_Angela VO: "I lean in to kiss Jordan, hoping to take away his nerves, and show him my support. Hoping I will calm down the butterflies fluttering around in my stomach. I lose myself in __his__ sweet taste and forget the world around me. For a brief moment I even forget that those lips kissed my best friend. I don't care __any more__, because they are kissing *my* lips now." _

A little later Jordan has gone backstage to get ready for the gig. Sharon and Angela have sat down at one of the tables, drinking in the atmosphere. Rickie and Delia walk in; Rickie spots them, waves and seems to tell Delia something.

"Hey you two! I didn't know you were coming here tonight?" Angela smiles at Rickie and Delia who have taken a seat with her and Sharon.

"Yeah, we heard Jordan had to play, and we like, figured you'd be here. I wanted to back you up, you know, just in case." Having witnessed many embarrassing Jordan-Angela moments, Rickie feels the need to protect Angela from further pain.

"That's so sweet Rickie, but I'm okay. I brought Sharon too, so…" Angela is touched by Rickie's loyalty, but somehow she knows Jordan won't treat her like crap any more.

Looking around for a familiar face, Rayanne enters the café as well. Angela notices her, but doesn't feel the need to talk to her yet. She wonders if Rickie set the two of them up, but then again, Rickie wasn't even sure Angela was gonna be here this night. She confronts him anyway, sounding a little cranky. "Did you invite Rayanne over, Rickie?"

"No Angela, I had like, nothing to do with this, trust me. She's like *Rayanne*, you know? It's Saturday night, and we're in a café. What do you expect? That she's gonna sit at home, all alone, moping?" Rickie sounds insecure, but sincere.

All heads turn towards Rayanne showing up at their table, expecting her to do or say… anything.

"Well, if it ain't like, my friends! So, how about it, room for one more? Or is it forbidden for me to like, come here?" Rayanne's breath stinks of alcohol, and her speech betrays she's had plenty to drink as well.

"Guess it's not forbidden, no…" Angela's mind is working overtime. Sure, Rayanne hurt her really bad, but she forgave Jordan. Shouldn't she give Rayanne a shot as well? What's the worst that can happen?

"So… You wanna come and sit with us?" The words slip from her mouth.

"Damn right!" Rayanne plops down at their table.

"You buy the first round!" Again the words came out before she could stop them. Angela shouldn't encourage her to have more alcohol. But she's not in the mood to play her mother tonight.

"Wow, Angelica… Does this mean I can like, *buy* back your friendship?"

Rickie hastily replies, "It means you can like, buy us some drinks, sit with us and who knows what might happen."

"Okay, okay… I mean, if it were like *that* easy… jeez. So, beers for everyone? Except for my dear pal Rickie of course."

"Maybe you should skip this round too, you know?" Rickie tries to sound casual.

"Yeah, right…" Rayanne walks to the counter to get beers for all but Rickie, but still includes herself.

Sharon leans towards Angela over the table and whispers worriedly, "Are you sure you're ready for her?"

Angela hesitates and pulls a lock of hair behind her ear. "No, I'm not. But I want to give her another chance, just like I'm giving Jordan… Now's as good a time as any, I guess."

Rayanne comes back with the beers, and they all sip at their bottles silently. "Oh come on, who died?"

They all start to laugh reluctantly, but after a while the conversation picks up again. Delia is giggling nervously. "This is so much fun! Rickie and I went to the movies last night and we had a blast!"

"Is that so?" Angela raises her eyebrow in a meaningful manner at Rickie.

"Oh yeah, Rickie's so sweet! And so much fun!"

Rickie shrugs and averts everyone's eyes. "You know me…"

Rayanne removes the bottle from her mouth and reacts sarcastically. "Yeah, that's my pal Rickie, so sweet and so much fun!" She raises her beer-bottle in a toasting gesture.

Just before things can get out of hand, or fall silent again, a man announces the start of tonight's program. "Here's the first band we've got for you tonight: RESIDUE!"

Angela looks towards the stage, her cheeks glowing with excitement. She turns to her friends. "Ooh, shh, all of you, it's Jordan!"

The band walks up the tiny stage, and the crowd applauds. Angela and her friends scream and cheer their lungs out.

Sitting down on a stool, Jordan is holding his guitar. He adjusts the microphone, and addresses the crowd. "Hey everyone, welcome, we're Residue. The first song's for you, Angela… It's called _'Set Me Free'_…" Jordan's eyes seek out Angela's for a brief moment, right before he shuts them, like it hurts too much to look at her.

Flushing instantly, Angela looks at Sharon. "Oh my god! What is happening?" She can't believe Jordan is going to sing her a song. It's embarrassing, but it's so *sweet*! She's freaking out because of all the nerves that rage through her body.

"Oh my God Angela!" Sharon shares Angela's excitement.

"Oh my God… He's not like, serious, is he?" Imitating Sharon and Angela, Rayanne's lips embrace the bottleneck again, pouring its contents down her throat.

Trying to ignore Rayanne, Angela turns to Rickie for confirmation. "Rickie, he isn't like, teasing me, like he did with _'Red'_, which turned out to be about his car?" She's so nervous, breathing becomes hard. Jordan tricked her into thinking a song was about her once already. But now, he like *told* her, this song's for her.

Rickie's face lights up. "I don't think Jordan Catalano would make fun of you… He's serious, sweetie!" He can't help but swoon along with Angela. It's *so* romantic!

Nervously, Angela looks around the table. "But, he can't even write love letters, let alone songs! Or can he…?"

"Hey, here's a thought: maybe he made Brian Krakow write the song instead!" Rayanne's sarcastic words make all the eyes at the table look in her direction again, this time angrily and shocked.

"Could you like, shut up?!" Angela can think of a million things to say to her, but she won't, not now.

Nattering through the firstchords Jordan played, Angela practically forgets to breathe when Jordan's hoarse voice finally starts to tell her the most beautiful things she's ever heard.

_"__I had no friends and family, but I didn't care._

_I didn't need anyone, until you were there._

_You had your friends and family, and you cared._

_You needed all of them, and for me you were there._

_I built my own prison,_

_And you hold the key._

_I built my own prison,_

_Angel, won't you set me free…_

_I tried to walk away from you,_

_From you, and your world._

_But since my world was you,_

_I couldn't walk away __any more__._

_I built my own prison,_

_And you hold the key._

_I built my own prison,_

_Angel, won't you set me free…_

_Angel, please, set me free…__"_

_Angela VO: "This moment must be the moment that changes my life for good. The song Jordan Catalano wrote for me changes my life, forever. This is better than any letter anyone ever wrote. This makes every mistake that ever happened seem like something so tiny, not worth bothering about__any more__. The past happened, this is the *now*. This is Jordan Catalano, telling me I am his world, and asking me to set him free…" _

When the last notes of the song have starved out, Jordan's eyes seek out Angela's again. He seems totally at unease, maybe because he has noticed Rayanne at their table too. Angela tries to give him a comforting smile, and it looks like he answers her smile with a faint one of his own. The crowd applauds and cheers, but Angela can't hear a thing but Jordan's words echoing through her head. The sight of him sitting there, holding his guitar, his eyes asking her for security, is burnt onto her retina forever.

Everyone falls to silence, touched by the profound song as much as Angela is.

"So, maybe I should, like, write you a song too, Angelica! Seems to work for Catalano…" Rayanne spills out in a double tongue.

"Anyway, I'm outta here!" She jumps up from the table, while Angela sends her a filthy stare. She walks to the other end of the café and starts talking to some guy, hitting on him. No doubt she will be umm-ing him in his car before the evening is over…

_Angela VO: "Why does Rayanne always have to be this sarcastic? How does she expect to become friends with me again, when she acts like *that*? It gets worse when she has been drinking, and she knows it. It almost cost her her life once already, so why can't she quit? You know, come to think of it, I actually pity Rayanne, I feel sorry for her. Sorry that she feels the need to prove herself all the time. Because I know her well enough to see it's just an act to hide her insecurity." _

Everybody has fallen silent again, feeling awkward. As they all watch Rayanne over by the bar, Kyle walks in. Happily, Sharon jumps up and waves at him. Kyle strides over to the table and takes Rayanne's place. They order a few more drinks and slowly the fun is coming back.

The rest of the set played by Residue doesn't really get through to Angela. She's somewhere else. The beer is making her feel comfortably numb and she is looking at the gorgeous, talented, but insecure Jordan Catalano. *Her* Jordan Catalano.

**To be continued...**


	4. Episode 23: Baby Steps

**A/N: This is the unbeta'd version, I'll replace it when it's beta'd. **

_Danielle VO: "So, my sister is flying around the house, totally in love with Jordan Catalano again. Apparently he wrote her a song, or something mushy like that. She's been humming it like, ever since. Well, I don't get the fuss. It's not like it takes a brilliant mind to write a song. I don't know if I like her this way, on cloud nine. It's like, everything I do is fine with her. She doesn't even shout at me. It's weird. I hope I never act that strange when I'm in love! I mean, do I?" _

[Monday morning, Chase's kitchen]

Graham is fixing breakfast while Patty is roaming around the kitchen, gathering her stuff. Patty asks her husband in a determined voice, "Graham, you promise me you'll talk to Hallie today?"

"Yes Patricia, I'll clarify things to her yet again. We can't go on like this. *I* can't go on like this. Sometimes I wonder why I ever got involved in this business with her. I should have known she was trouble, with her loud obnoxiousness."

"She's just gonna have to handle her feelings like an adult. You're not available, it's that simple! She needs to get her priorities straight. Business can't be mixed with pleasure!"

Playfully Graham starts off, "There's nothing wrong with having a little fun at work…" He continues seriously, "But *this*… is ridiculous…"

"Graham, you want me to talk to her?" Patty's face is frowned. She hates it when life surprises her like this.

Graham drops the cutlery he's holding and eyes his wife seriously. "Patty, don't patronize me, please. I am very capable of dealing with this myself, besides, I *need* to deal with this myself."

"I didn't mean to--"

"Hey, no breakfast yet?" Interrupting her parents, Danielle walks into the kitchen.

Both react abruptly. "No."

"Sorry for asking…" Startled at their curt retort, Danielle just hopes her parents won't keep arguing like, all the time.

"I'm sorry honey; your dad and I were just discussing something. I've got to get to work anyway. Dad will fix you your breakfast, okay?" Patty ruffles through Danielle's hair, then looks around wondering. "Isn't Angela out of bed yet? She'll be late for school if she doesn't hurry up!"

"I thought I heard her get into the shower…" Danielle takes a seat at the table.

Patty kisses Danielle and Graham goodbye and flees out the door, yelling, "Bye Angela!" to the top of the stairs.

[Outside school]

Not in direct sight of anyone else, Jordan and Angela are sitting in Jordan's car. They're entangled in a passionate embrace, once again. Their lips kiss, taste, tease and explore intensely. Backing out of their embrace, Angela fixes her eyes onto Jordan's. "Did I already tell you *today* how beautiful your song was…?" A goofy smile spreads across her face.

Smiling coyly, Jordan flicks his hair behind his ear. "Yeah, I know…You told me… Like a hundred times already…Since Saturday…"

"So, did I like, mention how much I loved watching you play then?" Angela gets hold of Jordan's hand and studies his fingers. She loved watching him play and sing; it was like he was singing to her and her alone. In a way he was, of course.

"Yeah, thanks, like, again…" Jordan's eyes study Angela's fingers entwined in his own.

Angela hesitates before she continues. "You know, I'm okay with what happened. I mean, you and Rayanne…"

"You're sure…?"

Angela nods her head. "Yeah, I'm sure." She's positive. She's over that, totally. They weren't even together then, so basically Jordan had a right to do it. Rayanne however, was still her friend at that time, so she had no right to do it.

Leaning in to kiss Angela, Jordan's lips are being met by Angela's passionately. His hands wander up her neck, pulling her closer towards him. Her hands fumble through his hair; her fingertips caress the sensitive piece of skin hidden underneath it. Jordan lowers one of his hands and brushes it over her upper-body, lingering for a while on the softness of her breast. His hand slides to the middle of her chest, fingers reaching to touch her skin, right underneath her blouse. He pauses from their kiss and his eyes ask Angela's permission to continue the exploration his hands are eagerly involved in.

Barely visible Angela nods to Jordan and almost immediately handy fingers slip the top button out of its hole; the second and third button follow shortly after. Jordan's fingers find their way on Angela's soft skin, fingertips following the lace outline of her bra. The trail of goose-bumps left by Jordan's fingers elicits tiny moans from Angela's mouth. His fingers push the hindering piece of cloth away, allowing him easier access to Angela's breasts. Skilled fingertips draw circles over her skin, their diameters becoming smaller and smaller, getting closer to her nipples, teasingly slow.

To fully enjoy the feelings Jordan awakes in her body, Angela closes her eyes. Sure, her own hands have been down that road before, but it never felt anything like this. Wherever his fingers go, her skin is being scorched. His hands slip around her back, unhooking her bra. It's like her nipples are provoking him to be touched, her back arched in his hands. As she glances at Jordan, Angela's eyes are drowned with desire. Her mouth feels dry from the ragged breathing but she doesn't care. She's about to lose control and it's the best feeling she's ever had.

Finally Jordan's thumbs caress her nipples, brush over them, while his fingers are kneading her breasts. Angela throws her head back and lets the unknown feelings wash over her, until they consume her.

Sudden screams and laughter, coming from outside of the car, bring Angela back to reality from her state of ecstasy. Startled she looks around; her cheeks flustered, extremely grateful there's no one around to be seen. There's no telling how far she would have let Jordan go if they'd been alone right now.

Pushing him away, she sits up straight, hooks up her bra and slips her buttons back into place again. "I'm sorry, but we need to slow down…"

"What? Why?" Jordan's eyes beg her to let him continue, his voice sounds hoarse with passion.

"Because we're like, outside of school, that's why…" Incredulous, Angela looks at him; surely he understands they're not doing it right here and now, where everyone can see them!!!

"I just thought… you know…" Jordan's voice sounds sweet, like he's trying to seduce her. Almost grateful, he eyes Angela, like she has just given him something incredibly beautiful.

"I don't want my first time to be in some old abandoned house, or in your car, and especially not right here where everyone can see us. I think I deserve more. *You* deserve more…"

"Yeah, you're right, I guess. I kinda forgot like, where we were…" Jordan smiles shyly at her and puts Angela's hand in his own, looking back up into her eyes. His fingers gently put a peek of her red hair behind her ear.

"That's okay. I forgot it too, like, for a while. You totally made me forget the whole world outside, by doing what you did just now." A sensual grin spreads across Angela's face as she eyes his reaction carefully.

"My pleasure, I guess…" Jordan displays an insecure smile again; questioning her seriousness.

"We should go inside, you know. We can't sit in here all day, unfortunately." Angela grabs her backpack from the backseat and plants another kiss on Jordan's lips. "Thank you, Jordan Catalano." Smiling, she gets out of the car and waits around for Jordan to do the same thing.

Holding hands they walk towards the school-entrance. She wonders if he has the slightest clue how good that makes her feel, how proud she is to be holding hands with him, how strong it makes her feel inside. Would he feel the same way?

Riding his bicycle, Brian Krakow passes the two of them by. Mixed emotions like pain, jealousy and disgust, are being exhibited on his face. Everything Angela can think of to say to him seems so pointless. It must be so hard for him to see her with Jordan, partly due to his own helping even... Before she even gets a chance to greet him, Brian has disappeared from sight already.

[School, the outside steps]

Positively glowing with happiness and holding hands, Jordan and Angela walk up the school steps where Brian and Rickie are sitting.

Brian spills his gut to Rickie. "They look so happy, it's sickening. It's even more sickening to know that I *helped* them get back together…I thought I wanted her to be happy, but seeing them together makes me wish I never wrote that *stupid* letter for Jordan Catalano!"

"Although I do think they look like, adorable, together… And I like, totally get Angela… I do know what you're like going through… And I hate to say it Brian, but, um, I think you're like, better of without her. I mean, you should get over her, for your sanity."

"Yeah, I know. It's just, I've known her for so long already. We used to hang out together like, all the time, play games, have sleepovers, you name it! Then this Jordan Catalano shows up and sweeps her off her feet… And now, she's suddenly out of my league. It's like, I can't even tell her anything anymore, because we speak like, a totally different language! High school sucks, you know?!"

"Yeah, it's like, we're cursed or something! We like, want to hang out with the Jordan's and Angela's of this world, and even better, we want to be them. But we're like, doomed to be part of some group that like, doesn't belong anywhere, and nobody wants to be part of anyway. Only we're forced to be part of it, because of all these stupid like, unwritten rules in high school that make your life like, a living hell!"

Ignoring Rickie's outburst, Brian continues phrasing his own thoughts. "But should I give Angela up, like without a fight? Should I just like, let her be with Jordan Catalano, eventhough *I* wrote the words for him to say to her? So, really, it should be me she's like holding hands with and making out with…"

"It's not like, just your letter anymore, you know?! Jordan Catalano like actually wrote her a song as well… And I hate to say it, but it was like, breathtaking. I wish someone would like, love me enough to write me my own song." Rickie seems to drift away in blissfulness, softly singing a few lines from the refrain of Jordan's song.

"_I built my own prison,_

_And you hold the key._

_I built my own prison,_

_Angel, won't you set me free…"_

"That's from the song he wrote her?! Okay, first of all, I gave him the idea to write a song!!! And secondly, that line about being trapped in a prison? That's literally something I told him to tell her apology-wise. Before he made me write the damn letter…"

Rickie looks at Brian perplexed. "You know, this love-triangle is beginning to become more and more absurd! It's like the movie Roxanne, based on Cyrano de Bergerac, you know that? Come to think of it, why are there like, so many love-triangles in my life?! What's wrong with just like, one-on-one love-affairs? Why does there always have to be like, some poor third person involved?"

Brian sighs, his chin leaning in the palm of his hand. "I know Cyrano de Bergerac yeah. He's as big a fool as I am, with no life whatsoever..." He looks at Rickie for support. "Why do *we* always have to be like, those poor, third persons?"

"I guess it's just like, our destiny, or something. But you know, you're in way too deep. The more you like, keep helping Jordan, the further away you'll drift from Angela…"

Brian drops his head between his opened legs. "So, any advice?" The feelings he has for Angela will kill him someday, he's sure of it.

"I'm no expert, you know. I've only been in love like, a couple of times, and those guys like, didn't even notice me. Hey, I could ask Rayanne for some advice? She's like the expert on this kinda stuff."

Brian gives Rickie a disturbed look. "Are you *serious*?! Please, leave her out of this. I don't trust her at all; it's like she's always trying to make a fool of me. And right now my life is miserable enough, thank you."

"She kinda does, doesn't she? But, like, let's think, what she would do in this situation… Oh, wait, I know! Try to make her jealous!"

"Who, Rayanne?" Brian's head hurts from thinking; his brain is having trouble keeping up with Rickie.

"No, silly, Angela!"

Sarcastically, Brian replies, "Oh, why didn't you like, say so in the first place?! So, what you're saying is, I should just like, find a girl who's either interested in me or is willing to play this charade along. That sounds so easy! If only, like, girls didn't avoid me, this plan would have been brilliant."

Rickie sighs, staring ahead, his chin resting on the palms of his hands. "And we're right back where we started…"

Delia walks by, and greets Rickie very enthusiastically. Brian gets a lukewarm "hey".

Brian looks at Delia and sighs, "I'll probably never have sex…"

"Yeah, me neither…"

[At the restaurant place]

Waiting for the workers to show up, Graham and Hallie wander around the empty space a bit awkwardly.

Graham starts hesitantly, "So, Hallie..."

"Yeah?"

Stopping dead, Graham fixes his eyes onto Hallie's. "Hallie, we seriously need to straighten things out. We can't go on like this."

"I know! How long can we stop fighting our feelings? You're a married man for God's sake!"

"You don't get it Hallie! I am *not* interested in you!"

"Stop lying to me, Graham!" She points her finger at his chest.

Graham rubs his eyes. "I'm not lying, Hallie! I can't deny you're attractive, and it's great fun to be around you, but that's it. No more. And we need to get this out of the way if we ever want this restaurant to be a success." He looks her in the eye, wondering what it will take to get through to her thick head. Even if he was attracted to her, he's just not the type of guy to cheat on his wife.

Hallie replies playfully, "So, you *do* find me attractive?"

Graham smirks. "You're not butt-ugly or anything…" He continues seriously, "But that's not the point here. The point is, we need to keep this professional. Or you will be doing this *without* me. Do you understand that?"

"I do understand, Graham, I just got carried away. But I want this place to be a hit, and I can't do it without you." She needs him in more than one way. Risking loosing him will mean the end of her dream as well…

"Are you *sure* you can handle it?" Graham raises his eyebrow at her.

"I am really going to try, Graham. I don't want to lose your friendship. But it's not going to be easy, being around you like all--"

Suddenly, the door opens and Graham's brother Neil walks in, interrupting their conversation. "Well, well, well! This is quite a place you got here!"

Enthusiastically, Graham gets up and greets his brother. "Well, well, well! Isn't that a nice surprise?!" He's actually *thrilled* his brother interrupted them. As far as Graham was concerned their conversation was through, but he wasn't sure Hallie was ready to give it up yet…

"Patty gave me the address. I figured, since you're really going through with this, it's high time I take a look!" Neil looks around the place a bit.

Hallie looks at Neill approving and steps forward. "Well, well, well! Who is this, Graham?"

"Oh, I'm sorry! Hallie, this is my brother Neill. Neill, this is Hallie, my business partner…"

Making their acquaintances, it seems like there are sparks flying between Hallie and Neill, to Graham's great pleasure. Approvingly, he watches them chatting together. This could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship…

After a short while the workers are coming in, interrupting their conversation as well. Graham gets hold of his brother's elbow and whisks him away from Hallie for a moment. "So, Neill, how are things with Marla?"

Neill's face displays bad weather, "Don't get me started…We're through, again. For good…"

"How convenient…"

[In the girls' restroom]

Sharon walks in, gesturing wildly, "I can't believe how *stupid* I am!"

"Slow down, Sharon… What happened?" Angela walks in behind her.

"You know, like after Jordan's gig, Saturday night… Kyle and I, like, had sex again…" Sharon leans against the bathroom wall.

"So…?"

"Well, we had something to drink, you know, and we like, forgot to…" Sharon distorts her face.

"Forgot *what*, Sharon? That you wouldn't *use* Kyle for sex anymore?" Angela is willing to pull the words from her friend's mouth, out of sheer curiosity.

"*No*! We forgot--" She falls silent.

"Oh my God! You forgot to *use* something?!"

"Yeah…" Defeated, Sharon sighs and rests her head on her hand.

"So, now what?"

"I don't know…I just have to wait for my period to come, I guess."

"When's that gonna be?"

Sharon sighs. "About two weeks from now. Two agonizing long weeks…"

"You know…I think I'm gonna wait to have sex with Jordan, just for a while. Like, *ten years* maybe." She's hoping to get Sharon to laugh a little again, but seriously, this is like bad stuff.

Sharon smiles faintly. "You don't know how lucky you are; like, not having to worry about all this…"

"Am I?" Am I lucky for not having had sex yet?

"Please Chase Face, don't rush things because you feel *pushed*. It's not worth it." Sharon looks at Angela pleadingly.

"That's not what you told me last time!" The other night Sharon told her that sex was like, great! Ofcourse, this changes everything, she gets that…

"Yeah… But that was before I screwed up…" Sharon has trouble fighting back that the tears that well up inside of her eyes.

Suddenly Rayanne walks in the restroom, hooking up with Sharon's latest remark. "Screwed up what?"

Both are quick to answer, "Nothing."

"Okay, I get it. Not my business!" Rayanne backs away; feeling attacked by them. It's not her fault she has to know everything that goes on around here!

Sharon regrets her blunt answer and tells Rayanne, "No, it's not, I mean, I can't tell you. Yet."

"Whatever," Rayanne puts on her lipstick while staring into the mirror; like she has forgotten about what happened already. Like it doesn't matter anyway...

Hesitantly, Angela asks her, "So, Rayanne, how's the play coming along?"

The fingers holding Rayanne's lipstick freeze in mid air instantly. "Fine, fine, we're like, very busy, you know, rehearsing and all. Amber practices with me like, all the time, at home. And the ticket sales are like, through the roof, you know?"

Angela smiles at her reassuringly. "Yeah? I know, well, partly. I already sold *my* thirty tickets, so. But it's good to hear, you know. I'm actually thinking of coming myself."

"You should. I mean, it wouldn't like, be the same without you. I mean, you can come, like, if you want to, it's no big deal or anything. Just do what you want, like, I don't care, I guess. " The grateful, relieved look Rayanne sends Angela says more than her insecure words do.

"So, you know where I might be able to get some tickets then, just in case?" Inside Angela is smiling because of Rayanne's words. She can't pour her heart out like a normal person, she has to stay like, *cool*, at all times.

Sharon sends Angela a meaningful look, probably thinking the exact same thing Angela is, about Rayanne.

"Let me check. Not quite sure…" Rayanne is hopping around restlessly already again.

"Okay. So, good luck, like, with rehearsing and stuff." Angela stuffs a lock of red hair behind her ear.

"Thanks, bye!" Rayanne bolts away again.

Sharon laughs at Angela. "She's like, *so* weird! I mean, she's like out of this world *all* the time, or something!"

"Yeah, I know. That's probably like, part of her charm, I guess." Giggling, Angela holds open the door to let Sharon and herself out of the girls' bathroom.

[At tutoring]

Jordan and Brian are sitting at a table again; books lie open in front of them. As he searches for words to thank him in his own unique way, Jordan's eyes flicker over Brian's face. "So, Brain, that thing you like, told me, you know, to write Angela a song?"

Jordan's eyes search contact with Brian's eyes; his mouth falls silent, waiting for Brian to respond.

"It worked out like, great!" Despite Brian's silence, Jordan continues anyway.

Without looking at Jordan, Brian responds angrily, "Don't talk to me about Angela!!! Please…" In his head he finishes the sentence. "_It hurts too much…!"_

"Why not? I just thought, like, since you helped me write that letter and all, you know…"

Brian's eyes lock onto Jordan's and his voice sounds dim. "I still regret every syllable I like, wrote down on that stupid piece of paper. I poured my heart out to her and someone else takes credit for it. Next thing I know, I tell him to write a song, and he like, does it, using my words again! Oh, and while he's at it, let him strip away the little shred of dignity I have left and take my *life* away from me too, please. It's worthless and it sucks anyway… "

"What? What do you mean, Brain? She like, loved your letter man! What are you talking about?" Jordan's reaction shows his ignorance.

"Obviously you don't get it, Catalano." There's no point in talking to him. He's either really that stupid, or that clueless to the world around him.

"Don't get, like, what, Brain?" Jordan gets a little frustrated, shoving around the books over the table, worried Brian might know something about Angela that he should know as well.

"Look, can we like, please forget this conversation, and do what we're supposed to do?!" Brian is tired of trying to explain things about his love-life to Jordan Catalano. Or rather, lack there of.

"Whatever," Jordan decides it's best to stop trying to understand Brain. He obviously doesn't want to explain things any further. Since he is used to being treated impatiently because of his so-called dumbness he accepts his role yet again.

Brian scrapes together some courage to tell Jordan one more thing he should have told him a long time ago. "By the way, I think it's best you find yourself another tutor. I can't do this anymore."

"I thought we like, had a deal? Like, you tutor me, I tutor you!" Even if Brain did react impatient just now, he has always tried to learn Jordan things. Jordan had something to teach him as well, so the deal was good for both of them.

"Yeah well, it turns out I am only helping *you*, and I can't do it anymore." A little afraid Jordan might not take 'no' for an answer and punch him in the face or something ruggedly savage like that, Brian eyes him carefully; prepared for a fit.

Jordan reacts resigned, "Bummer. Maybe Angela knows someone else…"

"It's not my problem, so just fix it any way you want to. I don't care." He gets back to tutoring, but seems absent-minded.

When Jordan and Brian are finally done tutoring, Brian takes off instantly. In the hallway he bumps into Rayanne. "Oh hey, Krakow, just the guy I need! Metaphorically speaking, of course."

"What do you want, Graff?" Brian is annoyed that yet another person has shown up to make his life miserable.

"You're in a crappy mood! Oh, wait! Did the mouse from your experiment like, die because of the pressure, or something? Anyway, how's the ticket sale going?" Rayanne looks at him inquisitively, one eyebrow arched.

"Oh…umm, well, I may have sold *one*…" Brian flushes; he totally forgot he was supposed to sell those lame tickets. That'll teach him not to sign up for anything ever again because there's a girl involved.

"Wow Krakow! That's got to be like, a new record! Be sure to take a picture of yourself to star in the school-paper!" Rayanne slaps him on his back.

Brian crumples with embarrassment.

"Anyway, how would you like to sell a few extra tickets then?" Rayanne searches her bag and her hand comes out holding up a lollipop. She unwraps it, throws the piece of paper on the floor and shoves the lollipop into her mouth.

Brian eyes her movements closely. "Not that I care, but I have a feeling you're gonna tell me anyway…"

Rayanne takes the lollipop from her mouth. "Angela like, thought about coming, and I figured, since you like, live across the street from her, you can just go by her house and tell her you're like, selling the tickets." She looks at Brian contently.

"It's not like we're that close or anything, but I could do it, I guess. …" The thought of going over there scares him, but thrills him at the same time. He can always use another excuse to see Angela.

"Oh come on, Krakow! It's like, never stopped you before, has it? Angela's been ignoring you for like, as long as I've known her, but you just keep following her around like a little, stray puppy anyway!"

"You know, it wouldn't kill you to be a little more tactful once in while." He flushes, knowing Rayanne is right; feeling embarrassed that everybody seems to know how he feels about Angela.

"Don't underestimate the power of straightforwardness, Krakow…" Rayanne waves her lollipop at Brian and takes off, disappearing as suddenly as she appeared.

[Chase House, around supper time]

Patty just walks in the backdoor, while Graham is fixing dinner. Angela and Danielle are lounging on the living room-couch, watching the TV.

"Hey honey, I'm home. So, how was your day?" Patty gives her husband a kiss.

"Well Patty, you won't believe this, but I think the solution to Hallie's infatuation lies in my DNA after all!"

"I don't have a clue what you mean, but you're gonna tell me, right?"

"Well, I confronted Hallie about –you know-" Graham tilts his head toward the living room where Angela and Danielle are watching the TV, then continues. "I basically told her she'd have to get her act together, or I would quit."

"Seriously?"

"Well, I really don't want to give this up, but if things don't work out, we have to come up with some sort of solution. Anyway, we hadn't even finished our conversation, when Neill walked in." Graham raises his eyebrows in a meaningful manner.

"Oh how nice! He told me he was going to surprise you one of these days. So, what did he think of the place?" A sincere smile lights up Patty's face.

"He liked the place. But the best part is, that is, if I am not mistaken…" He continues in a whispering tone, "He seems to like *Hallie*…"

Patty whispers, "What? He likes *Hallie*? But, what about Marla?"

"Marla and he are through. For good, this time. But wait, the story gets even better…" Graham dims his voice. "Hallie…seems to like him back."

"Seriously? They like each other?" Patty is taken by surprise to say the least, but this could be a good thing.

"You wouldn't believe the sparks I saw flying! And they hit it off in conversation right away."

"You know, if this was anyone but your brother, I would be relieved that Hallie has found someone new. But judging by Neill's love-history…"

"Whatever gets her mind of *me* must be a good thing, right?" Graham smirks.

"I guess so. Funny, how faith seems to have a hand in certain things." Patty's mind is trying to explain what happened here; is it a good thing or a bad thing? Hallie will leave her husband alone, but on the other hand, she might become her sister-in-law… The shivers that are going down Patty's spine aren't totally positive, that's for sure.

_Danielle VO: "It's funny how grown-ups always seem to think you don't have a clue what they're talking about. I notice how my mom reacts whenever __my dad talks about this Hallie-person. It's like, she's jealous or something. It scares me sometimes, thinking my parents might get a divorce. There are like so many kids in my class whose parents had a divorce. I don't want that to happen to me."_

The doorbell rings; Danielle jumps up from the couch to answer the door. "I'll get it!" She shoves the door-curtain aside to check who it is, and opens the door when she sees a familiar face. "Hi Brian." Her heart jumps a little at the sight of him. He's got the cutest curls, and--

"Hi. So, is Angela around?" Brian interrupts Danielle's thoughts on him unknowingly.

"Yeah." Disappointed, Danielle turns away from Brian and shouts at Angela, "Angela, it's for you!" She walks into the living-room and plops down on the sofa again.

_Danielle VO: "__It's not fair that Brian is like always here to see Angela. She doesn't even appreciate him; she doesn't see how smart he is. She like, makes a fool of him all the time, when even *I* can see how he feels about her. Why can't he be in love with me? The age difference isn't that big. Why does Angela like get to have two guys chasing after her, and me not even one? She always gets to do stuff first, and it's not fair!" _

Not in the mood to get up, Angela walks to the hallway slowly, greeting Brian lukewarm, "Hi."

Brian sorta waves at her. "Hey. So, um, Rayanne told me you may want to buy tickets for the play."

"I was considering it, yeah." Angela tucks a lock of hair behind her ear and curls her hands further into her sleeves.

"Well, I got stuck with like thirty tickets, so."

Angela cocks an eyebrow at him. "You too? I already sold mine, so. But I won't be needing all thirty of them, you know…" She smirks at him.

Uncomfortably, Brian smirks back at her. "I know. So, how many do you need then? I mean, are you going there with Jordan Catalano?"

With those magic words, Angela's mind drifts off immediately and she leans against the door-post. "Dunno. I haven't asked him yet, or anything. Doesn't seem like his kinda thing, though."

Patty interrupts them when she walks into the hallway, "Hi Brian, how are things with you? What brings you here?"

Brian makes the wave-ish kind of gesture again. "Um, hi, Mrs C, I'm selling tickets to the play, it's this Friday."

"The play? Oh, you mean "Our Town". I didn't know you were going, Angela?" Patty turns her head to look at Angela.

Still leaning against the door-post, Angela shrugs. "I'm still considering it. Rayanne asked me to."

"Okay, so, isn't Jordan coming with you? I mean, if I were you, I would go anyway. Hey, how about we all go, as a family, that'd be nice, right? I would like to see how Rayanne is doing. Plus, it will help Brian out, if we get a few extra tickets of his hands!"

"No, I don't think Jordan's coming. So, you like, really wanna see Rayanne? And you think I should go?" Incredulous, Angela looks at her mother. She wasn't even sure she wanted to go at all, and now they're like going with the whole family… How does she do that???

"Yes I do, Angela. Plus, you have been helping out too, haven't you? Aren't you the least bit curious even?" Patty tries to warm her daughter up for the play, trying to encourage her to watch her friend play.

"I guess so, it's just… I don't know."

"Brian, I'll buy four tickets from you. How much is it?" Patty makes up her mind for all of them.

"Thanks, Mrs Chase. That'll be thirty dollars then." Brian is glad to be acknowledged again; watching Patty and Angela talk, was like watching a game of tennis.

"Let me check my purse." Patty walks into the kitchen.

An awkward silence surrounds Angela and Brian, both looking around uneasy, until Patty returns with the money. "Here you are, Brian. So, will you be there as well, this Friday?"

"Thanks, Mrs Chase. Yeah. They've asked me take pictures for the school paper, so yeah, I *have* to be there." Brian hands Patty the tickets.

Patty holds on to the tickets and smiles warmly at Brian. "Okay, so, maybe we'll see you then!"

"Who knows, so, bye then." Brian takes a step back and raises his arm again for the wave-gesture.

"Bye Brian," Patty turns around and walks into the kitchen again.

"Bye," Angela closes the door and leans her back against it, closing her eyes. She has no choice but to go now; her mother decided for her. Not fate, but Patty…

**To be continued…**


	5. Episode 24: Our Town, Part I

_A/N: Another unbeta'd version, will hopefully be replaced in the future!_

** Episode 24: ****Our Town, Part I: Lies, Truths, Acts and Confessions **

[Chase's house, Friday morning]

Patty leans against the doorpost to Angela's bedroom. "Good morning, honey. So, are you excited about tonight?"

Angela reacts kinda grumpy. "Not really, why?"

Walking in Angela's room, Patty sits downs at her bed. "You know, I never told you this, but Camille and I sort of went through the same thing as you and Rayanne are."

"What? You mean Camille slept with a guy you liked?"

Slightly embarrassed Patty answers, "Actually, it was the other way around. He wasn't into her anymore, but I never should have done it. When she found out, she was *very* mad at me. I can't blame her, ofcourse."

"*You* did such a thing? You?" Sitting up straight, Angela is all ears.

"Yes, I did. And like I said, it's not something I'm proud of. We were both in college then."

"So, what happened next? I mean, you're still friends now, so, how did you make it up to her?"

"She forgave me, eventually. And I am still grateful to her for doing that. That's why I'm hoping you can do the same thing to Rayanne. Although I completely understand it, if you can't." Patty puts her hand on Angela's arm for a moment.

Drawing her legs up, Angela rests her chin upon them. "Mom, I am still in shock. *You* betrayed Camille..."

"I know, I know, honey. I am only telling you this because I hope it will help you decide things better. I have learned a *lot* from it, believe me…" Patty flushes.

"Yeah, I understand. But still, you were like *Rayanne*… I never would have pictured you as a wild one!"

"I made a few mistakes. That doesn't make me a wild one. Neither does it make me a bad person, for that matter. Just like Rayanne isn't…"

"I know…" Spinning her eyeballs, Angela plops down back on her bed, thinking about everything she just heard while her mother walks out of the room.

_Angela VO: "I cannot believe what my mother just told me. It's like, you have this image of your parents. They're like, your parents. They aren't supposed to have a social life, not even __a past social life. Especially if that past social life is a nasty one... They aren't supposed to have sex, especially not for fun. It's far too embarrassing to think about your parents having sex."_

"_Seeing those pictures the other day of my mom and her old boyfriend, was so weird. She had a life before she met my dad. It's like I keep forgetting that my mom is actually a normal person, who is not always in control, and is capable of making mistakes, no matter how perfect she always looks. She is not just a mother who exists to make my life worse. She was a daughter herself, once…" _

[Jordan's car pulls over in front of the Chase's house]

Smiling, Angela walks out the front door and gets in Jordan's car. "Good morning!"

"Morning…" A quick kiss is all Angela gets before Jordan drives off. "You know, I was like, thinking…"

"Yeah…?"

Jordan puts his hair behind his ears. "You know, you're like, going to the play tonight?" His eyes wander over the road, only to flicker at Angela briefly.

"And you're like, not."

"I'm not, no. But maybe, I could, like, pick you up afterwards?" Avoiding her eyes, Jordan stares at the road.

"It's a Friday night, Jordan, I don't know like, how long I can stay away after the play. And since we'll be going with the *whole* family, well…"

Jordan's eyes glance at Angela's quickly, displaying hope. "I was hoping, like, well, my dad's out of town, so…"

"What about your mom then?" Angela has never heard Jordan mention his parents. She still doesn't know that much about him, actually.

"She umm, she hasn't been around for years…" Jordan's eyes display a kind of sadness.

"What do you mean? Did she pass away?" Angela puts her hand on Jordan's arm to show him she's giving him her full attention.

"No, she took off, like, when I was three," Jordan swallows away a lump in his throat that wasn't there before.

"Oh my God, Jordan, I am like, so sorry for you! I didn't know… I mean, you never told me…"

"It's okay, I mean, I'm used to it, I guess…" His eyes show he's telling the truth. It's not painful anymore to him, most of the time.

_Angela VO: "__Jordan's mom *left* him when he was just little. What kind of monster does that to her child? How can someone leave behind a cute, little Jordan Catalano, and never look back? Suddenly my mom doesn't seem so bad after all…" _

"I'm really sorry Jordan, I don't know like, what to say right now. I mean, wow…" Angela is struggling to find the right words; it feels like she's been smacked in her face.

"Don't worry. I'm okay, you know that, right?" Jordan flashes his eyes at her again quickly, in-between eyeing the traffic.

"I know, Jordan. You're more than okay." The smile Angela gives him won't stop her heart from aching.

Almost afraid to bring up his question again after shocking Angela; Jordan hesitatingly asks her, "So, what about like, tonight then? You wanna like, um, spend the night with me?"

"I'm not sure…" Flabbergasted, Angela's emotions go back and forth between indignation and excitement. Should she be offended he wants to have sex with her this soon, or should she be flattered?

"I didn't mean…" Jordan's eyes display desperation as his brain tries to seek the right words. "I mean, if you're like, not ready, it's okay." He tries to reassure her he's willing to wait, if that is what she wants.

Right away, Angela's heart melts. He's not pushing her like he tried to do before, and it makes her love him even more. She actually feels ready to have sex with him.

"You know Jordan, as much as I would want to come over to your house, I don't think I can pull it off. I mean, like, what do I tell my parents? That I'm spending the night over at Jordan Catalano's house? They will ground me for like, the rest of my life!" Angela's eyes spark with fire at the thought of her parent's reaction, no, even worse, her mother's reaction!

"Can't you just, like, tell them you're crashing at Rayanne's or something?"

"I don't know… I'd have to lie to my parents like, big time... And Rayanne and me are not that close yet, you know." Angela eyes Jordan closely; he has given this a lot of thought already, or so it seems. It's not that she doesn't want to or anything… Like the other day, when his hands were feeling her up… Damn, she came close to surrendering herself to him completely!

"I know… It was just like, an idea…" Jordan's voice sounds regretful, Angela didn't react the way he hoped she would do. He hates himself for asking her to do this thing; what if she still isn't ready?

"You're making this hard on me, Jordan. Maybe if you told me sooner, I could have…"

"Look, forget it. I should have known…" Jordan wishes he never asked her; the risk of losing her is too big, he should have known that.

Catching the sorrow in his eyes Angela tries to reassure him. "It's not like I'm saying 'no' or anything, just let me think about it, okay?"

"Whatever," Jordan closes him self off again, his face looks blank while he focuses on the traffic.

[School, girls restroom]

In the restroom Rayanne and Rickie are talking. Rayanne greets Angela enthusiastically, "Yo, Angelica! I'm like, so glad you're coming to watch the play tonight!"

"I wouldn't want to miss it, Rayanne." Even if Angela's mom decided for her in the end, it is still the truth.

In between bites from her candy-bracelet Rayanne addresses Angela. "So, like, Amber's throwing me this party afterwards. Just a few friends, nothing like the party I threw ofcourse, but, um, would you like to come over? Tino will be there too!"

"Please, Angela, just come! It'll be just like old times!" Rickie pleads Angela with his eyes. It would be great if she could hang with them again, and if *he* could hang with both of them again without having to feel guilty.

"I'd have to check like, with my parents, you know, and I think I sorta have other plans already…" Angela is torn; she would actually *like* to go over to Rayanne's, but she can't let Jordan down either.

"What do you mean, sorta? What kind of plans?" Rayanne leans in closer to Angela.

Angela keeps her voice down. "Jordan just asked me if I like, wanted to come over to his place tonight. His dad's like, out of town, or something." Saying it out loud, no matter how softly, makes her truly aware of the meaning of Jordan's proposal.

"What?!" Rayanne and Rickie both react at the same time.

"Jordan Catalano just like, asked you to spend the night with him and you are having doubts? Just go, Angelica! What's there to think about?" Rayanne bounces up and down with excitement.

"Oh my God Angela!" Rickie slaps his hand on his chest.

"I know, I think I want to go, but, what do I tell my parents?" Angela keeps searching her mind for the right thing to do.

"Tell Pattycake, I've like asked you to come to my party, and that I like insisted you sleep over! And tell her not to worry, since Amber will like definitely be around this time."

Angela's face saddens. "But… I do want to come to your party, Rayanne. I was hoping, you know, we could like, be friends again…"

"As your friend I'm like, telling you to go home with Jordan Catalano! The party's like, probably going to suck anyway, you know, with Amber being around and all."

"You really wouldn't mind?" Angela is thankful Rayanne understands her choice, though she can't help but feel Rayanne still owes her a few favours after what she did. If Rayanne would insist she come over to her party instead of going home with Jordan, she wouldn't be a good friend, right? Hope dawns upon Angela; maybe this plan will work after all!

"Please, I like, know what's best for you. And that is, like, Jordan Catalano." For now it's enough to know that Angela forgave her. There will be other parties.

"Yeah, Angela, just like, grab this chance!"

Angela gives Rayanne a hug. She didn't realise how much she missed having her around until this moment.

_Angela VO: "Tonight I am __most likely going to have sex for the first time, ever. I am going to go over to Jordan Catalano's house, where we will be all alone, all night long. And I have to say, it scares the crap out of me, even if I have been thinking about it a lot, of course. Tomorrow, I may not be a virgin anymore. _

_I wonder what his room looks __like; I wonder what he will think of me. I wonder what it will feel like to finally do it, and I wonder what he will look like, completely naked. Oh my God, I have to stop envisioning him naked, or everyone will be able to tell what I am thinking of…" _

[Yearbook room]

"Brian, are you all set for tonight? You know what kind of pictures I need for the story about the leading role in "Our Town"? Sharon is pacing around the room.

"Yeah, I know. I'll just stalk Rayanne till she smacks the camera out of my face. Sometimes being a photographer sucks, you know."

"You're just doing your job. And try not to show your loathing for her through your pictures, please?"

Brian answers sarcastically, "Is it that obvious?"

"The whole school like, knows! And remember; take some shots during rehearsals as well!" Sharon usually has faith in Brian, but lately his mind seems to be off…

"Yeah, it's not like I have anything else to do." Brian walks away and mumbles to himself, "I mean, besides my extra courses, tutoring, letter-writing for the reading-impaired, ticket-sales for some stupid play I'm not even interested in, being rejected and ignored by every girl I find even remotely interesting, the absence of a love-life or even a social life for that matter, I'm not busy. At all!"

A little concerned, Delia watches Brian walk away, "He's not like going, psycho on us, is he?"

Sharon confesses her worries, "With Krakow you can never be too sure. He's clearly suffering from the whole Jordan-Angela thing."

"Don't tell me he's still trying to get with her?"

"In my opinion, I don't think he'll *ever* be over her. It's sad, you know. Especially when you know he helped them get back together." Sharon feels sorry for Brian, she really does.

"That's a dumb thing to do, for such a smart-ass."

"Brian isn't half bad, you know. He like, helped Jordan Catalano write Angela a letter, even though he's in love with her him self. It means he like, puts Angela's happiness first…" Sharon feels the need to defend her childhood-friend.

"If you put it that way…" Delia's opinion on Brian seems to change after Sharon's remark.

"I know he like, did an unforgivable, low thing to you, but imagine what he will do for you once you've won his heart! I feel kind of sorry for him, you know."

"Strangely enough, I feel sorry for him too, all of a sudden. So, what are you saying, I should give him another chance?"

"Maybe that is what I'm saying. Maybe you should like, make some things clear to him first, though. Like that he should get Angela off his mind, for instance." Sharon wanders through the room, gathering papers.

"I mean, Rickie is very safe to be in love with and all, but some physical loving would make a nice change…" Delia's cheeks are glowing instantly at the thought of Rickie.

Sharon's facial expression turns sombre in a heartbeat. "You know, come to think of it, physical loving is like, so overrated!"

"What? But I thought, you and Kyle, like, still--"

"No. Never again. Ever. No way."

"Did something bad happen, Sharon?"

"I'm not sure." Sharon continues in a whispering tone of voice, "I may be, you know, pregnant…"

Delia slaps a hand over her mouth with shock. "Oh my God Sharon! How… What… I mean…"

"I'm still waiting for my period, it's due in a like a week or so. Then I will know for sure." Sharon plops down in a seat.

"That's horrible, Sharon! Have you told him already?"

"No, besides you and Angela nobody like, knows. So, shh." Sharon puts up her finger to her lips. "No need to be alarming him yet."

"I guess you're right. Your period may come after all, and then you've, like, scared the crap out of him for no reason."

"Exactly!" Sharon stares into oblivion, wondering what will happen to her and her life.

[At the restaurant place]

The workers are busy painting the upper half of the walls in a heavenly blue kind of colour. The lower half of the wall consists of wainscoting.

Graham just walks into the room when Hallie walks in, "Hey, Hallie! What's up? You look happy!"

"Hey Graham! Do I? Well, you'll never believe what happened!" Hallie's cheeks are glowing with excitement. "Your brother asked me out on a date!"

"That's not so hard to believe…" Graham chuckles, asides from seeing the sparks fly between them; Neill is also like, a serial-dater of some sorts.

"Who would have thought…? Love *does* happen in the strangest places!" Hallie is floating on cloud nine, she practically dances around the restaurant.

"I am so glad you and my brother are getting along. It's such a relieve to me!" Graham is sincerely happy for her and Neill; but most of all for himself and Patty.

"You don't mind, do you?"

"I couldn't be happier, trust me."

"Me neither…" Hallie smiles and her mind drifts off again.

[In Mr Katimski's classroom]

"Gee whiz, I can't believe the um, play is tonight already! I am so excited!" Mr Katimski is sitting at his desk, his eyes going round the classroom.

Some kids respond to Mr Katimski's remark, but most of them just hang in their seats, bored out of their minds, or sleepy.

Tucking a lock of hair behind her ear, Angela looks around the classroom until her eyes meet Jordan's. Smiling, she gives him a note. Over the last few weeks his reading skills have improved somewhat already, but just to make sure he won't be confused, she tried to keep it as short as possible.

Jordan divides his attention between the note and Angela, eyes flicking back and forth. Opening it, it reads:

"_Jordan,_

_Pick me up after the play tonight._

_I will go home with you._

_Love, Angela"_

_Angela VO: "__If you don't know about Jordan's reading-problem, you'd think he is like, studying the note. But I know he's trying really hard to decipher the words."_

After glancing at the note for a while, Jordan looks up again and gives Angela the most gorgeous, yet shy smile she's ever seen. Goosebumps travel all over her body because of the way he looks at her.

Shutting his eyes, Jordan leans back in his chair; like it hurts to look at the world again. Or maybe what's on the inside of his eyes is just better.

_Angela__ VO: "I've been meaning to ask Jordan why he shuts his eyes like, all the time, but I think he doesn't know the answer to it him self. Then again, do I really wanna know?" _

Rayanne raises her hand, not awaiting any permission to continue, she asks her teacher, "Yo, Mr K, are we sold out for tonight?"

Startled from his thoughts, Mr Katimski looks around and spots Rayanne's raised hand. "I believe we almost are, um, yes, Emily. There are only twenty-five tickets left."

Immediately, Brian blushes. That is the exact number of tickets he has left. His assignment was to sell thirty tickets, but he only managed to sell five. Four went to the Chases, and one to some girl he doesn't even know. He raises his hand.

Mr Katimski checks his seating chart and addresses Brian, "Yes, Brian, is it?"

"Mr Katimski, if anyone else wants those tickets, you know, to sell them, or buy them, I know where they are." Brian feels bad for not fulfilling this task. Then again, he has had enough things on his mind lately.

"Yes, Brian, thank you. I know you were supposed to sell them, but it's okay. Gee whiz, there are worst things!" Mr Katimski assures Brian by nodding slightly.

Brian mumbles low, "I know…"

The bell rings, and over the screeching of chairs and gathering of books Mr Katimski raises his voice at the class. "Drama-people, please don't forget um, to come to the final rehearsal after school!" All of the students leave the classroom, some talking to another one.

Seeking out her hand, Jordan hooks up with Angela. "So, tonight…"

Angela reacts kinda shy. "Yeah, tonight. So, I'm telling my parents I'm staying at Rayanne's. She invited me to come over to her house, since her mother's throwing her a party. So it's a good alibi. But I figured it'd be easier to tell you this in person, instead of writing it all down on the note."

"Yeah… I mean, reading is like, becoming easier, but, you know…" A faint smile, displaying his happiness, is lighting up Jordan's face.

"I know." Angela gives Jordan an understanding look. He's come a long way in a short time, and she's proud of him. She's kind of happy to be in on his secret.

"Excuse me…" Brian pushes Angela and Jordan aside, and storms past them. He overheard their conversation. Angela is doing something with Jordan Catalano tonight and she tells her mom she's staying at Rayanne's.

He *so* did not want to hear that. He doesn't ever want to hear anything regarding Angela again. It makes him sick to think about what Jordan Catalano and Angela might be doing tonight; sick with jealousy.

As he flees past them, Jordan eyes Brian. "What's his rush?"

"Probably off to do some extra credit assignment or something, who knows…?" Thinking about what might happen tonight, has made Angela incredibly happy; and totally unaware to the things that are happening in the world around her.

[Drama room, after school]

"Am I really supposed to wear this? Are you kidding me? It's like an old Hessian bag! How am I ever supposed to impress anyone by wearing this?! Can't we update this play a little Mr K?" Rayanne holds up her costume and makes a disgusted face.

Mr Katimski shakes his head. "Gee whiz, Rayanne, we've already updated the play too much, in my humble opinion! All the decors, you know, weren't even supposed to be there! The play was meant to be played with three props only: a chair, a table, and a, um, ladder."

Rayanne cocks his eyebrow at him. "I still think the play would have been better off with wardrobe-updates, instead of decors and props."

"Rayanne, you will impress more people by showing um, your acting skills, than showing them your--"

"My what? My body? I can't help it I look this good! If we were meant to hide our bodies, we would have been born with clothes on!" Rayanne's hands follow the curves of her body and she strikes a Marilyn-Monroe-pose.

Mr Katimski responds sarcastic, "And a very passionate speech in favour of acting in the nude that was, Miss Graff, very impressive indeed! Save your persuasiveness for tonight, my dear child."

His camera hanging around his neck, Brian walks in. Loudly, Mr Katimski greets him, "Well, hello, Brian! Have you come to sell us your tickets?"

"Very funny. No, as you can see I am supposed to take some pictures for the school paper and Yearbook." Brian holds up his camera like he feels the need to justify his presence.

Mr Katimski puts his hands together in a clapping noise, "Aah, excellent! Just do your thing then, we'll pretend you're not even here!"

"That's the story of my life anyway…" Brian takes a seat in the otherwise empty audience.

"Rayanne, gee whiz! What have you been doing to that costume?!" Mr Katimski eyes Rayanne, who has torn off so much of the skirt-part of the dress it resembles a mini-dress now. She flaunts her legs, her hands gliding from her ankle all the way up to her thigh.

Rayanne asks way too innocent, "What? You don't like it? I wanna bet Krakow likes it, or am I wrong here, Krakow?" Stopping in front of Brian, she walks over the stage; her hands sliding over her legs again.

Sure enough Brian's eyes follow the movement of Rayanne's hands, which in their turn follow the curves of her leg. His throat feels dry as he speaks, "Could you cut it out, for once! You keep accusing me of looking at your legs, but I explained it to you before! I am looking from the point of a photographer!"

"So, Krakow, why don't you get a hold of your fine-tuned instrument then, and like, point it at little ol' me…" Seductively, Rayanne's fingertip lingers on her lips, only to disappear between her lips, suckling at it gently.

"I don't do fake shots." Brian flushes and tries to avert his eyes.

"Nothing fake up here, Krakow. What you see, is what you get!" Rayanne stomps to the other side of the stage again.

Mr Katimski can barely watch; his hand is covering up his eyes. "Gee whiz, could you two stop this, please? Rayanne, I can't approve of that um, costume, no way. I am going to have to dig up um, another one. Let's just rehearse some more, and I'll find you another costume later."

"My, isn't the moonlight terrible?" Rayanne recites her first line and seems to lose herself in her character quickly.

While Rayanne and Brett are rehearsing their piece, Brian moves around the room to get some good shots. He can't resist taking a close-up shot of Rayanne's legs, showing from under her mini-dress. Even though he despises her, loathes her even, he's feeling strangely attracted to her. She's not like any girl he knows. She's not a girl, for that matter. She's a full-grown woman, with curves in all the right places, and the confidence to show them off. Even if she treats him worse than Angela; which is hardly possible.

[Chase's house, supper time]

The whole family is sitting down and eating dinner when Angela asks airily, "So, mom, is it okay if I go over to Rayanne's after the play tonight? Amber's throwing her a party, and she asked me to come."

Patty raises an eyebrow, "A party? At Rayanne's?"

Trying to get attention as well, Danielle interrupts the conversation. "This kid from my class, you know what he did? He just *farted* when we were all reading quietly!"

"Don't worry mom, it'll be fine. Amber will be there like, the entire time." Angela tries to reassure her mother.

Patty responds sarcastically, "Oh, well, if Amber is there…"

"Oh, come on, mom! You're the one who insisted I forgive Rayanne!" Seriously, Angela eyes her mother. She told her the sad story about her and Camille for a reason, right?

"You're twisting my words, Angela! I never urged you to do so; I just made you see it from another perspective!" Patty hates it when her words are being used against her.

"Exactly, and that's what I am trying to do now. I want to be friends again with Rayanne."

Looking at everyone at the table in turn, Danielle continues, "And you know what happened next? The teacher kicked him out! And you know what he did while he walked out of the classroom? He farted again! Boys are like, such pigs!!!"

Patty sighs. "I know, Angela, it's just, the last party you went to, over there, didn't end that well." Shivers crawl down her back when she thinks back of that night.

"I know that mom. But Amber won't let that happen again. And Rayanne has learned too, she's not like, doing drugs or anything that stupid anymore."

"Patty, give Angela this opportunity. She didn't let you down at that last party, did she?" Graham takes hold of his wife's hand.

Danielle interrupts the conversation angrily, "Why doesn't anyone listen to what *I* have to say? Like, ever?!"

"Please mom?!" Angela's eyes plead with her mom's to let her go tonight. It's a good thing her mother doesn't know the truth… Or is she that transparent?

"Well, I guess it's okay then. I trust you, you know that. If something bad happens, you know what to do. And Danielle, we *do* listen to what you are saying, dear."

"Yeah mom, I know what to do. I will call you if anything happens." Angela continues nonchalantly, "Oh and mom, is it okay if I spend the night there too? It will save you or dad a trip late at night…"

Patty falls silent for a moment. "Well, apparently it's very important to you, so…" She didn't see that one coming.

Angela's face is glowing with hope, "Is that a yes? Please, mom?"

"Yes, it's a yes. Just promise me you'll live up to my trust, Angela." Patty isn't feeling a hundred percent sure about this, but she will have to trust her daughter anyway.

"I will, mom. You know me." Smiling, Angela gets up from her chair and gives her mom a hug. Patty is taken by surprise, but grasps the moment and hugs her daughter back.

Danielle sobs, "No, you're *not* listening. You never are. It's always about Angela here."

Releasing her self from her embrace with Angela, Patty looks at Danielle. "Honey, that's not true! We had to discuss this, that's true, but it doesn't mean you're less important to us!"

Danielle crosses her arms in front of her. "If that's true, then what was I talking about?"

"You said boys are pigs. Now, are you satisfied?" Patty recaps her youngest daughter's story.

Danielle mumbles, "That wasn't like the *only* thing I was saying…"

_Angela VO: "__I thought for sure my mom had me figured out. I don't think I've ever lied to my parents this big-time before. I was trying to stay all cool and nonchalant about it, but I was sweating like a pig. I was deathly afraid it was like, written all over my face. "Liar! Liar! Liar!" _

_I can't even look at __my parents straight now, without feeling guilty. If only they understood how I feel about Jordan, and accepted that I am not their little girl anymore, maybe they would let me... _

_But I guess, in their eyes, I __will always remain a little girl, just like Danielle."_

[The school auditorium, later that evening]

It's a busy evening; voices humming everywhere, people are trying to get a seat. On the stage the last preparations are being made, and the lighting is being tested. Some actors are running through the halls to guide their families to near-stage seats.

Walking in, Angela and her family encounter Amber. Patty greets her, "Oh hi, Amber! Isn't this exciting?"

Amber seems very anxious. "Oh, I am so psyched! I am so proud of Rayanne for getting up there!"

"I totally understand! I can't wait to see how she's doing! What a nice idea of you by the way; to throw her a party afterwards!" Patty is making polite conversation and it shows to those who know her better.

"I'm always up for a party, doesn't matter what the reason is. But I am very proud of Rayanne, so I thought it would be a good way to show her my support." Amber is glancing around, looking for someone.

"Yes, it is, it's such a good way to show it. And thank you for inviting Angela, too."

"Oh, of course! Rayanne insisted she come by and sleep over, and it's always a pleasure to have this angel around."

Sounding a little too sweet, Amber gives Angela a hug and whispers in her ear, "Don't worry, Rayanne told me you're not coming. I'll play along, honey."

Trying to hide her flushing face, Angela is prolonging Amber's embrace until she feels the heat subside from her cheeks.

_Angela VO: "Rayanne actually told her mother that I am going to spend the night at Jordan's house?! It's __like; Amber knows I am going to have sex for the first time tonight! That is like, so embarrassing! I had forgotten how close Rayanne and her mother are, obviously. I can't imagine ever letting my mother in on a secret like this, not even in an alternate reality. Jeez, my mother approving a thing like this would even be unthinkable!"_

"Thanks, Amber, for like, having me." Gratitude beams from Angela's eyes as she lets go of Amber.

Pinching Angela's cheek, Amber winks at her. "Always a pleasure, Angel." She takes off, and the Chases walk a little ahead to find four seats next to each other.

"Hey, it's still early, so I'm gonna go and see who else is here." Angela gets up and walks into the girls' restroom where Sharon happens to be, putting on her lipstick. "Hey!"

"Hey, you're really here! So, are you and Rayanne like, totally cool again?" Sharon gives Angela an inquisitive look.

"We're getting there," Angela smiles faintly.

"That's like, good to hear, you know. She was like, really miserable without you. And I know how much that sucks…"

Recollecting her ridiculous behaviour towards Sharon in the past, Angela kinda flushes. "Yeah, I know. So, how are you doing?"

Sharon's facial expression changes instantly from relaxed to stressed. "My period still isn't due and it's driving me *crazy*! I like, feel nauseous, half the time, and…"

"Look, Sharon, I'm sure it's nothing. You're probably just imagining things because you're nervous."

"I hope so too, but I will be like so glad when I finally get my period! It's like, I go the bathroom like thirty times a day, to check if my period is there already. But, nothing happens. It's so frustrating!"

"Oh Sharon, I feel so bad for you." Angela gives Sharon a big hug to show her support.

"Thanks, Chase face. So, how are things with you and Jordan?" Sharon backs out of their embrace and fixes her eyes curiously onto Angela's.

For the second time in minutes, Angela flushes. "Well, funny you should ask that… He has asked me to spend the night as his house, tonight…"

"What? Oh my God Angela! Are you doing it? I mean, are you going to spend the night?"

"Yup, I still can't believe I'm doing this. I like, told my parents this horrible lie about spending the night at Rayanne's, and they bought it. It makes me feel so bad, but they won't let me go otherwise, you know, so what else am I supposed to do? They have to stop treating me like a kid!" The slight tremor in Angela's voice makes her words come out not totally convincing.

Sharon jumps up and down with exhilaration. "Oh Angela, this is so exciting! Tonight you will lose your virginity! Just promise me one thing…?"

Angela knows what Sharon is about to tell her and smiles at her. "Let me guess: do it safely?"

"Yes! I can't like, tell you enough! *Don't* lose your head, and don't let him persuade you by giving you some bullshit-story about his size or whatever."

"Guys actually *do* that?" With her mouth open wide, Angela gazes at Sharon.

"Some guys will say the most ridiculous thing to get out of using anything, trust me."

"Thanks for the head's up."

"Oh, and Angela? You know that time, like, when I said that um… you could so much better than Jordan Catalano…?" She squints her eyes like she is expecting Angela to punch her.

"I mean, that was like, when he didn't want to acknowledge your existence, but it's different now. He is different now; treating you with the respect you deserve, so..."

"Yeah, I know you why you said it then. It's okay. Thanks, Sharon."

"One last thing though: don't forget to *enjoy* it. I mean, spending an entire night with Jordan Catalano, that's got to be like a dream-come-true for you!"

"Yeah, I know. I'm scared out of my mind, and my stomach-butterflies won't stop fluttering, but I can't wait…" Angela's cheeks flush again at the thought of the very near future.

"Good luck, Angela," Sharon eyes Angela like a chicken eyeing her chicks, proud, but concerned.

[Backstage, 15 minutes before the show starts]

The actors are walking from one way to another; some are putting their make-up on, others are putting on their costumes. More people are walking around with props, and pieces of décor. Mr Katimski is hopping from one person to another, to check all sorts of things. In the midst of this chaos Brian Krakow is taking snap shots of the entire cast and crew. Rickie is helping Rayanne put on her make-up.

Rayanne seems jittery. "Did you like, see all those people out there, Rickie?! I'm nervous as hell! I need my flask…"

"Rayanne! I have faith in you! You're gonna do this without alcohol! You can do it!"

"Yeah, just like that time I had to sing in Catalano's band, remember?"

Rayanne jumps up from her chair, and walks over to her belongings. She looks around to see if nobody is watching and she grabs the flask from her coat pocket. Rayanne pours the liquor down her throat, just as Brian catches her through the lens of his camera. Hesitating to take a picture of this moment he lowers his camera.

Looking up, Rayanne sees Brian stare in her direction. "What are you looking at Krakow?"

"Nothing, I was just leaving," Brian feels like he got caught with his hand in the cookie-jar; which is totally ridiculous since he caught *her* doing something illegal.

Rayanne points at him. "You're a little pervert, you know that?" She walks over to him, and stops in front of him, threateningly close. "Get of my back, Krakow, or I'll make your life miserable."

"You're already doing a pretty good job at that. I'm just supposed to take pictures of the crew and cast, and more particularly of you, since you're the leading lady. Be thankful I didn't take a picture of what I just witnessed."

"Rayanne and her flask, ooh, there's a big secret!"

Rickie approaches them. "Rayanne, why don't you give Brian a break, huh?"

Rayanne retorts sarcastically, "Yes, daddy."

Rickie sighs. "Come on, don't be like this, Rayanne. I like, *totally* understand you're nervous, but that's no reason to like, make it so hard for Brian to do his job!"

"Thanks, Rickie, but I--"

Mr Katimski raises his voice and interrupts Brian (amongst other people), "People! Can I have your attention please! Gee whiz, it's just a few minutes until curtain call, so I hope you're all ready! I wish everyone a good show! And remember, if you don't know your lines anymore, I will be behind the scenes to *help* you! Just look in my direction and it'll be fine! Oh, the thrill of the show! Now, all of you; break a leg!!!"

"Oh crap, I have to like, put on my costume. Where's my costume? Rickie--" Rayanne grabs hold of Rickie's vest and looks at him pleadingly. "You gotta like, help me!"

"Rayanne, chill! You'll be fine! Here's your costume. Let's go over here, where there's a little more privacy, okay?" Rickie leads Rayanne to an improvised dressing booth and guides her through its drapes.

Seemingly out of it, Rayanne tries to put on the costume but it's like her hands and brains aren't in synch. She's wrestling with sleeves and has her dress put on backwards. Desperately, she eyes Rickie. "I can't like, do this, Rickie. I can't!" She plops down on her butt.

"Come on, Rayanne. Here, I'll like, help you with your costume. Relax. Just forget about all those people, imagine you're up there all alone. Can you like, do that?"

Rickie helps to get Rayanne in her costume. When he's done he notices that it's the mini-version Rayanne created herself. "Rayanne, are you sure you like, want to wear *this* costume? I thought Mr Katimski had found you another one?"

"This one's fine, Rickie. Besides, there's like no time left anymore. I have to go up there in like, a couple of minutes. You heard the man…!"

"Suit yourself, Rayanne. Now, look at me!" Grabbing hold of Rayanne's arms Rickie addresses her tenderly, but firmly. "You can do this. I'm proud of you! Just forget you're acting, and pretend it's real. Imagine the pain. Forget the audience, you're doing this for you, and you alone!" Rickie gives Rayanne a hug.

"Thanks, Rickie, for being here. Now--"

After taking a deep breath, Rayanne continues sounding like a totally different person. "Let's get this show on the road! Woohoo!" She bursts out of the dressing-booth at full throttle.

**To be continued…**


	6. Episode 25: Our Town, Part II

_A/N: Unbeta'd again, I'll replace it as soon as possible!_

**Episode 25:**** Our Town, Part II: And… Action! **

[School, night of the play, in the audience]

Angela takes back her seat in the audience, next to her family. A few moments afterwards, the curtains rise. The audience applauds, cheers and whistles. Angela can clearly hear "_Go Rayanne_!" coming somewhere from the audience.

_Angela VO: "I __know the person shouting out 'Go Rayanne!' is Amber, and I have to laugh at it. Rayanne's mom is very supportive of her, though I'm not sure it's all that healthy to be your daughter's closest friend instead of being her *mom*. I can't imagine my mother acting like that, and I am not sure I would want her to, actually. It's kind of embarrassing, really."_

The audience falls silent when a storyteller comes up the stage, followed by a spotlight. He shares his story with the audience about the first act and characters. There are a few painted trees to be seen in the background, and the backdrop of a small town.

Dressed in her mini-dress, Rayanne walks up the stage, causing audience to hum and buzz. The spotlight gets fixed on Rayanne who seems very fragile up there. It's like she's a 1930's rock-chick; she seems so out of place. Seemingly willing to run away, she looks around; the despair is radiating from her face. After turning her head to look behind the scenes, she gazes into the audience again. It looks like she's slowly regaining herself again.

"My, isn't the moonlight terrible?" After Rayanne recites her first line, she loses herself in her part completely. While she continues her monologue, the audience seems to hold its breath. They are clearly moved.

Angela is feeling overwhelmed by Rayanne's acting again, she's saying everything like it's straight from her heart.

Meanwhile Brian takes pictures from the actors from different angles. He sees Rayanne in a whole different light; she seems so sensitive, so fragile. So human and so warm even. It's like she's speaking to him alone. At times he forgets to take pictures of her because he is being captivated by this wonderful creature up there, it's like he's worked by her magic.

When the final scene has been played, the curtain falls. The audience bursts into applause and gives the actors a standing ovation. The curtains open again, showing the entire cast in a long line. At the end of the line Mr Katimski is standing positively glowing. The audience keeps on applauding and cheering until the curtains drop for the final time. Noisily, the crowd gets up; voices start to hum, feet are shuffling and chairs are screeching.

The curtains at the stage peek, and Rayanne comes running through the gap up the stage, looking around. Spotting her daughter Amber shouts, "Rayanne! I'm coming up there, wait!" Amber runs through the crowd, up the stage and gives her daughter a big hug.

Angela spots Rayanne as well, "Mom, I'm gonna go up there too, you know, to tell Rayanne how great she was."

"Okay honey, we'll wait for you by the doors."

"Okay. See you in a bit." Angela runs up to the stage.

Amber's face is glowing with pride. "You were *so* great up there! You have no idea how proud I am of you! You had me crying like an idiot…"

Holding on to her mother shoulders, Rayanne backs out of their embrace. Looking Amber in the eyes she asks, "You really thought I was good? Really? You're not just like, saying it?"

"Angel, you were really good. You should seriously consider a career in acting. If that's what you want to do, ofcourse."

"You know, maybe I will. I was like, so scared to go up there tonight, but once I had, like, found myself, it felt so good!"

From a short distance Angela watches them, slowly approaching. "Rayanne, you were so good that it like, hurt to look at you!"

"Thanks, Angelica." Rayanne laughs a bit. She wants to hug Angela, but doesn't know if that's okay. Angela stretches out her arms and Rayanne practically *jumps* in Angela's embrace.

"Oh, Angela, it's so good to see you two back together again. I missed you too, you know!" Watching the two girls makes tears well in Amber's eyes.

"Come on, we'll tell Pattycake she can like, go home. I mean, Jordan is coming over soon, isn't he?" Rayanne eyes Angela curiously.

Angela smiles coyly. "Yeah, I told him to come over at around 11 o'clock."

Rayanne's arm is wrapped around Angela as they walk off the stage, through the almost abandoned auditorium. "So, Angelica… are you excited?" She casts Angela a meaningful look.

Angela's voice quivers. "I am like, so nervous, I'm like, trembling all over. My mind is like, repeating this mantra, over and over again: 'Tonight…tonight…tonight'. I have never been more nervous in my life, ever!"

"You'll be fine, don't worry! Heck, even *I* like, suffer from stage-fright! But it ended up cool anyway, so…"

Rayanne and Angela have reached the doors where Patty, Graham and Danielle are waiting.

"Rayanne! You were great! Congratulations!" Patty sounds pleasantly polite.

Graham gives Rayanne a sincerely meant compliment. "You were indeed! I seriously enjoyed the show!"

"Thanks, I mean, I'm a natural, so, what else did you like, expect?"

Angela addresses her mom, "Mom, I'll catch a ride with Rayanne and her mom, so you can go now, if you like."

"Oh… okay, honey. So, have fun tonight you two! And remember what I told you, Angela." Patty arches her eyebrow, while her face stays straight.

Remaining cool, Angela twitches to go. "Yeah mom, I know. Bye dad, bye Danielle. Bye mom." She kisses her mother on the cheek swiftly.

"Bye honey. Have fun you two, and be careful." Graham points at his eldest daughter.

"Bye Angela. Mom, can we go now?" Danielle tugs on her mother's sleeve.

"Oh, you almost forgot your sleeping-bag!" Patty holds out Angela's bag to her.

Rayanne waves at the Chase's. "Later!"

"Thanks mom, bye." While Angela holds on to her bag, she and Rayanne run back to the stage where Amber is still sitting down, like she is absorbing the atmosphere.

In the meantime, Rickie has joined her. "Rayanne! I just knew you could do it! I'm so proud!" He gives her a hug.

"Gotta hand it to you, Rickie, you've been like, a great help. I couldn't have done it without you!"

Rickie refuses to take credit for everything. "Well, umm, I just like, helped you out a little, but hey, you did it, all by yourself!"

"Yeah, I did, didn't I?" Proudly, Rayanne smiles, feeling happy she pulled it off; the singer-in-a-band-thing turned out to be *quite* the fiasco, so she had her worries...

Rickie bares his teeth in a silly grin. "Oh! I umm, took the liberty of like, inviting Corey over to your party tonight, is that like, okay? He's waiting backstage for us. He's even like, promised to give us a lift! No offence, Amber."

"The more, the merrier! I'm pretty sure Tino like, won't show up anyway, so. You okay with it, Amber?" Rayanne's mood is becoming more and more festive by the minute.

Amber reacts okay. "I'm fine with it, angel. As long as it won't be anything like the *other* party, I'm fine with it. And Rickie, non offence taken! So, I guess that means I can go home now? The two of you are coming over later, with Corey?"

"Yeah, you can like, go now! So like, see you at home, Amber!" Rayanne gives Amber a quick hug and kiss.

"Okay, see you later! Don't be *too* long! Oh, and Angela? Good luck, angel." Winking at Angela, Amber walks away.

"Thanks, Amber. I guess." Angela's cheeks flush instantly.

"So, let's go find Corey then!" Restlessly, Rickie is pacing around.

Rayanne pulls Rickie back on his sleeve. "Wait! Angela, are you coming with us, or?"

"What time is it?" Angela looks at a clock in the auditorium. "Oh, it's almost eleven. Jordan would pick me up around this time, so I have to go. Rayanne, I'm really sorry again, for not coming to your party. Have fun, you guys!"

"No sweat! Have fun Angelica, and be safe…" Grabbing hold of Rickie's arm again, Rayanne whisks him away.

Barely finding the time to wish Angela luck, Rickie looks over his shoulder at her. "Yeah, have a terrific night, and be careful."

"Thanks. So… I guess I should be going then." Angela hesitates.

"Don't worry, Angela. You'll be fine…" Rickie releases himself from Rayanne's grasp, walks over to Angela and rubs her arm.

"I hope so…" While Angela walks away, Rickie and Rayanne run backstage.

[Outside, Jordan is leaning against his car]

_Angela VO: "Every step I take brings me closer to Jordan Catalano. Just *look* at how incredible he looks! He's made leaning into an art. With every step my heart starts to pound faster. I don't know how much more of this I can take. I'm afraid I will burst if my heart goes any faster. __Right now, I wanna be with Jordan more than I have ever wanted to be in my life. And let me tell you, there have been some intense moments before. I am shaking and trembling so hard I don't think I will be ever be able to stop. Maybe all it takes is for Jordan to hold me, so the feelings will subside." _

Angela smiles at Jordan shyly. "Hey, so, you came."

"Hey you. 'Course I came!" Jordan's eyes are glowing softly.

"Jordan? I really need a hug…"

Wrapping his arms around her, Jordan presses her body tightly against his. One of his hands goes through her hair. Angela looks up at his face and is being sucked into his blue eyes immediately, calming her down, yet nerving her even more. Holding Angela's face up by her chin, Jordan kisses her tenderly, yet intense.

"Let's go…" By speaking in a hoarse voice, Jordan breaks the enchantment. Holding open the door to his car, Angela climbs in. Following her example, Jordan gets in on the other side and they drive away into the night.

[School, backstage]

"Krakow? What are you still doing here?" Rayanne is surprised to find there's anyone left, even more so that it's Brian. "Isn't it *way* past geek-bedtime?"

Not expecting anyone else to be here as well, Brian sighs at Rayanne for disturbing his peace and quiet. "I wasn't finished yet, just ignore me." He continues dryly, "And my parents aren't at home, so no, it's not past geek-bedtime until *I* decide it is, thank you."

"Ignoring you..." Rayanne flutters around the room.

"By the way, you were umm… pretty intense, tonight."

Taken by surprise, Rayanne retorts sarcastically, "Thanks..." Krakow made her a compliment, wow. That must have been like, *so* hard on him!

Congratulating her, Corey walks up to Rayanne. "Rayanne Graff, you were amazing tonight! And thank you, for inviting me to your party!"

Rayanne acts flattered. "Thanks, Corey! Sure, you're welcome like, any time! This party won't be the same without you!"

"Rayanne, I was like, telling Corey, your mom is like, the best!" Sneakily, Rickie's eyes flicker to Corey.

"Yeah, like, tell me something I *don't* know. So, like, when are we leaving?" Rayanne is growing impatient.

"Shouldn't you, like, change your clothes first?" With a raised eyebrow, Rickie eyes Rayanne's wardrobe.

"Oh! Of course! This'll just take a minute." Rayanne starts tugging at her dress and Rickie can see where this is going.

"Rayanne, why don't Corey and I like, wait outside by the car, and we'll meet you there? I'm sure Brian won't mind like going somewhere else for a while so you can undress, right, Brian?" Rickie is doing the best he can to keep Rayanne from flaunting her body at every guy in the room.

"'Course, I'll be on the stage." Brian walks away.

In order to give Rayanne some privacy Rickie and Corey walk outside. Rayanne takes off her dress and puts her own clothes back on, a blue denim mini-skirt and patchwork-blouse. Her flask falls from her coat-pocket when she picks it up, and she takes a few sips. She gathers her stuff and runs out the door into the auditorium, unaware that Brian is watching her from the stage.

Reaching the doors of the auditorium, she tries opening them. "What the --?!"

Pulling and pushing the doors won't open them to her anyway. Dropping her stuff, she attacks the doors more viciously. "This can't be happening!"

Dumbstruck she turns around, facing the stage where she spots Brian all of a sudden. "Krakow? What is up with these doors? Did you lock them?"

From a distance, Brian has been watching Rayanne and walks up to her, calmly. "Do I *look* like I would lock these doors? Do you actually think I like, want to be stuck in here with you, all night? Like, again?!" Brian tugs at the doors and studies the locks.

Covering up her eyes with her hands, Rayanne sighs. "Ugh, don't remind me. This can't be happening again, no way!"

"Well, it is. These freaking doors are locked solid!"

"So, now what? There's no other way out?" Rayanne's eyes search the auditorium.

"We could like, check, but I'm afraid not."

Brian and Rayanne search the auditorium and backstage department for doors. There's one emergency-exit door, but it won't open either.

Rayanne slides down to the floor. "Great. I'm like, stuck in school, again. I'm like, stuck in school with Brian Krakow, like, again. I am absent at my own *freaking* party, and nobody like, knows where I am!"

"Corey and Rickie are still like, waiting for you, aren't they?" Brian looks at her hopefully.

Rayanne jumps up. "Yeah they are! Maybe if we bang the doors really hard, they will hear us!"

Brian answers flatly, "I doubt it. These walls are soundproof."

"This sucks, big time." Rayanne slides down the wall again, plopping down on her butt.

[At Jordan's house]

_Angela VO: "I am __standing inside Jordan Catalano's room, looking around. I have fantasized about this place so many times, that I still can't believe I am finally here! It's everything I expected, but then again, nothing like I expected. The walls are a plain creamy colour, and there are posters up of several old, American cars. There's a desk with a chair, a closet and a three-quarter bed. His guitar is standing in a corner, like he just put it aside. His room is actually kind of neat, not as messy as mine. There aren't many clothes scattered all over the place, for example. _

"_It still feels like I am dreaming and none of this is real. Looking around this room unleashes so many feelings, it's unbelievable. I am shivering all over, but I don't know if that has anything to do with the room-temperature. I feel like being trapped inside the lion's den, like I can't go anywhere. The pressure is so big. Then again, I don't want to go anywhere else. This is right where I want to be, in Jordan Catalano's room, with nobody else but him."_

Walking up to Angela from behind, Jordan's arms wrap around her waist; her back is pressed against his chest, warm and tight. "You okay?"

"Yeah… I think so. It's just, well… I'm very nervous…" Angela smiles while she tucks a lock of hair behind her ear, then closes her eyes at the sensation of Jordan's hot breath in her neck.

"Yeah, me too." Jordan's arms wrap around Angela's body more tightly; his chin rests on her shoulder, his lips press a tiny kiss in her neck.

Angela is taken by surprise by Jordan's honest answer. She never thought he would have been nervous as well. It's not like it's his first time, or anything. And he asked her several times to have sex with him, you just don't *do* that without intention, or do you?

Letting go of Angela, Jordan walks towards his bed, his hand stretching out to get hold of Angela's. Taking his hand, Angela takes a seat next to Jordan, on his bed. The lights are dim, but not so low she can't see him. They turn towards each other and lean in slowly for a kiss. Their lips touch gently at first, exploring, tasting; before their kiss deepens and their tongues join in the passionate game. Jordan's hand caresses Angela's face and slides down into her neck. His lips follow the trail hungrily and leave a tingling sensation all through Angela's body. His hands open up the buttons of her blouse, revealing a black lace bra.

Feeling slightly insecure, Angela looks up at Jordan's face. His eyes devour her body, which makes her feel better instantly. Rather than worrying about the way she looks, she is planning on enjoying this.

Her hands trace the shapes of Jordan's body through his shirt, until they disappear under the soft cotton. His belly feels warm but very firm, and his skin soft. She trails her hands upwards, taking the shirt along with them. She pulls his shirt over his head and tosses it behind him, on the floor. The sight of Jordan Catalano's upper-body is so breathtakingly gorgeous she starts to tremble even more.

[Outside of school, in Corey's car]

"What's taking her so long? She said like, a couple of minutes! Nothing went down, right?" Rickie's getting anxious.

Stretched out in the car-seat, Corey isn't worried at all. "I'm sure she's fine, maybe she like, ran into someone and lost track of time?"

Rickie answers fiercely, "No, Rayanne wouldn't be late for her own party, trust me!"

"Stop worrying, Rickie. She's *fine*!"

"I'm going inside anyway!"

Rickie climbs out of the car and walks up the school steps to the school entrance. Trying to open the doors, he discovers they're locked. "Oh my God! She's locked in! Now what?"

Rickie runs back to Corey's car and tells him Rayanne is locked in. "We should get help! But who has the keys to the school?"

"The genitor maybe? Or the cleaning crew? What time will they be here?"

"We can't wait for them to like, show up! They won't be here until morning! And who knows, it's like, the weekend, so maybe they won't come until Monday morning!" Rickie starts to bite his nails.

"Okay, let's think. Doesn't Mr Katimski have any keys?"

"No, there is only like, a certain amount of teachers who do. Crap. You know, the one person who like, knows every single person with a key to the school, is locked inside that building…" Rickie points towards the school-building. This is so typical of Rayanne!

"Maybe we should go and warn Rayanne's mom first, before she worries. Maybe she'll know what to do?"

"Yes, you're right. Let's go over to Amber, before she starts worrying." Rickie settles his nerves a bit, Rayanne's just locked inside, it's no big deal. She's not in any *real* danger, she'll be fine.

[Chase's house, midnight]

The telephone rings shortly after Patty and Graham have fallen asleep when, awakening them brutally. Patty answers the phone in a groggy voice. "Hello?"

Amber is on the other end of the line. "Patty, it's Amber. I am *so* sorry to disturb you at this hour, but Rayanne hasn't come home yet. You haven't heard from her, have you?"

"Oh my God Amber! No, I haven't heard anything from her, I'm sorry." When she realises something, Patty sits up straight. "I thought Rayanne and Angela were gonna go home with you? Is… is… Angela missing as well?"

After hearing his wife ask that question, Graham sits up straight as well; pressing his ear to the telephone to listen in on the conversation.

Amber tries to sooth Patty. "No, no, don't worry. Angela is just fine. Rickie and Corey were supposed to drive Rayanne home, so I went ahead. Oh, could you hold for a minute? The doorbell is ringing!"

Waiting patiently on the line for the outcome, Patty's mind is working overtime. She hears talking in the background and tries to make out what they're saying. The only words she can decipher are, '_school_' '_keys_' and '_police_'.

"Patty? It's alright. Rayanne has been found, and she's okay. Nothing happened. I am so sorry I had you worried, our girls are okay. Go back to sleep and forget I ever called. Thank you." Before Patty can react, Amber hangs up the phone.

"Oh, okay Amber. Bye now."

Staring at the phone in her hand incredulous, Patty turns to Graham. "Now that was a very strange phone-call. Rayanne wasn't home yet, and now she had suddenly 'been found'. What does *that* mean? And you know what else? She mentioned that Rickie and Corey were supposed to drive Rayanne home, but what about Angela? She never mentioned Angela in there. All she said was that Angela was fine."

Graham frowns. "That Amber had me really worried there! What do you mean; having suspicions again?" Trying to calm her down, his hand caresses his wife's upper-arm.

"I mean, you don't suppose that Angela *isn't* over at Rayanne's or Amber's, but somewhere else? Like, maybe at the police-station or something? I heard her mention the word police…"

"Maybe you're reading too much into this? Amber is like, totally on another planet, if you ask me. Maybe Angela and Rayanne were actually *both* missing, but she didn't want to alarm you yet? And when Rayanne and Angela turned up, it all turned out fine." Graham's mind isn't fully awake anymore, thinking about this doesn't come easy.

"I don't know, Graham. I have a feeling there's *more* to this. Like Amber was hiding something. Just call it maternal instinct, if you like."

"Maybe it was just your imagination. You have never trusted her anyway, so maybe you're looking to *find* something?! Besides, Angela would never lie to us, she's far too smart. Don't worry honey. Just go to sleep. You heard Amber, our girls are fine." Graham turns over and gets cosy again.

"Maybe you're right, maybe you're not."

Lying down, Patty's brain isn't ready to go to sleep at all. Suddenly she recalls something from the drive home; Danielle mentioned she saw Jordan Catalano's car parked by the school, while Angela told her he wasn't gonna be there… What if Angela met up with Jordan, instead of going over to Rayanne's?

[School, backstage]

Rayanne is beginning to get kinda wasted. "So, Krakow, want a sip?" She holds up her flask in front of Brian's face.

Brian politely declines her offer. "No, thank you."

"Oh, come on, don't be so uptight all the time! Live a little!" Rayanne's voice sounds slow.

Hesitating, Brian comes to the conclusion he doesn't have anything to lose. He grabs hold of the flask and pours some of its contents down his throat. When he experiences the burning sensation in his throat, he coughs instantly.

"Wow, slow down, cowboy! First time, ey?" Rayanne takes back the flask and drinks some more.

"I have had liquor before, thank you very much!"

"One sip o' beer doesn't count, Krakow!"

Grabbing the flask from Rayanne's hand, Brian gushes down some more of the amber-coloured liquid. "Good stuff."

After wiping off his mouth he continues, "You know, Rayanne, you were like, really great up there, tonight."

His brain is beginning to feel comfortably numb, and he kind of loses control over his speech. It feels good to feel so vague, but it's scary at the same time. He is used to be in control with each and every situation. Well, scientific situations obviously, *not* girl-related situations.

"I know…" Rayanne bursts into laughter, Brian laughs along with her.

"I don't think I've ever seen you laugh, Krakow!"

"I don't know… I guess so. My life isn't all that funny…" Brian bursts into laughter again.

Rayanne laughs with him. "Yeah, I guess, like, you're right! I mean, you're in lovvve with *Angela* and she just like, ignores you and shacks Jordan Catalano instead! But hey, so did I. Ooops!" Rayanne slaps her hand over her mouth.

"How can you say --? Don't you have a *heart*? I mean, aren't you like, sorry?"

Rayanne is very serious all of a sudden. "Sure I am, Krakow, like, every minute of the day, every second even! Every time I look at myself in the mirror I like, wonder, if it's all worth it, you know? I stare at the razor in my hand, and wonder if I should slit my wrists to ease the pain…"

"Are you serious about this?"

Rayanne continues slightly dramatic, "Would I lie to you, Krakow?"

"Yeah, only like, all the time."

Rayanne laughs out loud. "Okay, busted! You didn't like, actually think I want to commit suicide, did you?"

"With you, you never know. Really. I mean, maybe you should like call some Teen Help Line if you have these serious issues."

Rayanne looks at him with disgust. "Teen Help Line? And then what, like, talk to a girl named Jade and pour out my heart to a stranger? Jeez, if anything will like, get me suicidal, it's *that*, Steverino..."

Brian falls silent for a moment. His brain isn't working as fast as usual, but it's beginning to dawn. "What did you just call me?"

"Steverino! Hi, I'm Jade!" Rayanne holds out her hand to make Brian's acquaintance.

"*You* took my call that night? You, of all people?"

"So? I can like, listen too, you know! It was my first time though, so, how did I do?"

"How did you *do*? Someone calls you, telling you they like, feel lonely, and you turn it into a sex-call!"

"So? Why do you think whores exist? For you lonely guys out there…"

"You are un-believable, you know that?!" Brian turns his face away from hers; he can't look at her anymore.

Rayanne takes another sip and continues, "I know, I've heard it before."

"So, were you *really* naked then?" Brian has to know, even if it means suicide. He glances at her quickly again.

Rayanne raises her eyebrow. "What do you think, Krakow?"

"Like I said before, with you, you never know…" Brian looks down at his shoes.

"Did you want me to be *naked* then?"

"I'm a teenage boy, what do you think?!" Brian fixes his eyes onto hers.

"Ah, so you *have* been checking out my legs! Admit it, Krakow, admit it!" Jumping up, Rayanne twists Brian's arm on his back.

"Okay, okay! I admit it!"

Rayanne whispers in his ear, "So, you wanna *feel* my legs too, do you?"

Brian flushes and stutters, "Stop-stop playing me, Rayanne!"

"Who says I'm playing, Krakow? Just feel my leg, feel how smooth it is…You know you want to…"

Rayanne grabs hold of Brian's hand and places it on her ankle. Her hand on top of Brian's guides its direction; all the way from her ankle, over her shin, her knee, right up until her thigh.

Brian can't swallow, or breathe. His eyes are fixated on his hand, guided by Rayanne's hand; and the silky, naked flesh he feels. "Oh my-my G-g-god…"

"Ready for some more action, Krakow?"

Slowly, Rayanne unbuttons every button of her blouse, showing more skin by the inch; while Brian's eyes follow each tiny movement of her fingers, drinking in the sight of her creamy skin. His mouth won't seem to shut anymore and his eyes don't blink, worried they might miss some little detail.

Totally unaware of the world around them, both of them startle when they hear footsteps enter. Rayanne pushes Brian away from her, and quickly buttons up her blouse. Right after finishing up the last button, somebody walks in the room.

An older police-officer addresses them. "Good evening kids, are you ready to go home?"

Gathering her stuff, Rayanne gets up quickly to run towards the police-officer. She wraps her arms around him and pouts her lips when she speaks. "Thank you so much for coming to rescue me! I was trapped in here with *him*!" She sends Brian a filthy stare, before she continues, "And worst of all, I was missing out on my own party!"

The police-man says, "There, there, miss, it's alright now. Let's get you back home." Pushing Rayanne off him, gently, he turns his head towards Brian. "Son, are you alright? Are you coming along?"

Looking around to make sure he has got all of his equipment, Brian walks towards the police-man. "I'm coming. Thank you, for *saving* me."

Disappointed, Brian looks at Rayanne. She just hisses at him, "*One* word about what happened tonight, and you're dead, Krakow!"

Depressed Brian thinks it's like nothing ever happened, even though she acted *so* different tonight. It's like she has two personalities! Well, no matter what she says, or how she acts, he'll always have the memory of this wonderful experience. He grins from ear to ear when he thinks back.

[Jordan's place]

Already having unhooked Angela's bra, Jordan is devoting his full attention to her small, perfect breasts. His tongue traces over her breasts and draws circles around her nipple. The feeling is so agonizing sweet it *hurts*. Angela knows she's ready, so her hands wander down over Jordan's belly, her fingers linger above his belt. Looking up at him, she unbuckles his belt. One by one she slips the buttons of his fly from their holes, and allows her hand to explore underneath the denim. When her fingers touch him there, Jordan moans. She never imagined it would feel anything like this and it turns her on beyond believe to feel his arousal.

"Jordan, is it okay if I take your pants off?" Angela sounds hoarse, she wants to see him naked, *now*.

"You don't like, have to ask me, you know…"

"I know, I mean, I didn't think you'd mind, but…" Her hands grab hold of the firm denim and try to lower Jordan's pants. Jordan lifts up slightly to give her the necessary room. Angela giggles because of all the excitement. His pants are stuck on his ankles and she yanks them off, determined.

_Angela VO: "Jordan Catalano is sitting on his bed, almost totally naked, and ready for me. I think I'm gonna die with excitement… He is so freaking beautiful, it hurts to look at him!"_

"Do you have any idea how gorgeous you are?" Angela's mouth feels dry when she speaks, while her eyes take in the sight of his beautiful, almost naked body.

"Thanks." Jordan smiles coyly, and tucks his hair behind his ears in a nervous gesture. "You too, like, beautiful, I mean."

Out of embarrassment, Angela takes off her skirt and panties rather quickly, turning down the sheets swiftly. Fully naked, she slips herself into the bed, just behind Jordan, asking him, "Come lie with me, Jordan?" One hand is supporting her head; the other one pats on the bed, right next to her.

"Are you like, sure… about this?"

Nodding at him, Angela displays a dreamy smile. Oh yeah, she's ready for him…

Jordan gets up, and gets a condom from his desk-drawer. Right in front of Angela he lowers his tight boxers; giving her a full, good view of his… erection. Angela bites her lower lip to restrain herself.

_Angela VO: "I have__ never actually seen an erection before; well, I've seen pictures of it, but nothing prepared me for this. It looks kinda funny, but also, it looks… big! Is Jordan like, absolutely *sure* it will fit inside of me? I'm beginning to get slightly worried that maybe this will hurt after all..."_

Jordan steps into the bed next to Angela, who is all nerves. They start to explore each other's bodies further as the night falls. Jordan gives Angela his full attention, and Angela is eagerly exploring every inch of Jordan's body; before they slowly become one. It's more beautiful than she had ever dared to dream. Jordan is displaying a tenderness she never expected him to have, and more patience than she had given him credit for. They fall asleep in each other's arms afterwards, totally exhausted, but immensely happy.

**To be continued…**


	7. Episode 26: Underneath the Surface

_A/N: Another unbeta'd episode, I'll replace it as soon as possible!_

[Jordan's house, Saturday morning]

_Angela VO: "__I just awoke in Jordan Catalano's arms, after the most wonderful night of my life. Sometimes I wonder if I'm still dreaming, like maybe this never happened for real. Maybe this only happened in my head, because it seems too good to be true. I am so happy, I feel like I am about to burst!"_

All tangled up in Jordan's embrace, Angela is slowly awaking. Sunlight is filtering through the curtains, playing games of hide and seek over their faces. Jordan is taking in the sight of Angela's sweet face when her eyes open up slowly. A smile spreads across her face when Jordan's eyes stare back at hers. "Hey." She scoots even closer to him.

"Hey." Jordan's can't take his eyes of the sweet creature lying in his bed, so close to him.

"You wanna know something?" Angela can't stop smiling and gazing into his eyes. She would give anything to wake up next to Jordan for like, the rest of her life.

"Yeah…" Jordan's eyes encourage her to say more.

"Last night was like, the best night of my life, ever. Thank you for that, Jordan Catalano." Angela's eyes give away the gratitude she feels towards Jordan.

"My pleasure." Jordan gives Angela a sweet grin.

"You know, I can't believe this…"

Still at disbelief with the whole situation, Angela stares at the ceiling. "I can't believe… I'm not a virgin anymore!" She wants to let the whole world know before the feeling consumes her from within.

"Yeah, me neither. I was like, so hoping you'd come. But it was like…" Jordan licks his lips before he continues, "I was afraid you would like, change your mind."

"You know, I was afraid of that too. I was like, so nervous to be here with you, alone, you know."

"Angela?" Jordan's voice sounds a tiny bit insecure.

"Yeah?" Angela turns her head to look in his eyes; while the smile of happiness seems to be plastered on her face permanently.

Jordan's eyes are fixated on Angela's. "You were, like, umm, the first girl I brought here, you know?"

"No, I didn't know that. Thank you for doing that, Jordan, again."

"That's okay." Wrapping his arms around Angela tightly, Jordan buries his face in her hair.

_Angela VO: "Jordan Catalano never seizes to amaze me. I know there have been girls in his life before. So why didn't he __like, ever bring one of them home? Is he like, really serious about me? Or maybe he is like, ashamed about his home situation? There is like *so* much about Jordan I don't know yet, or even understand. But I am willing to figure him out completely, both mentally as well as physically; because he is like worth the effort and time completely. And the best part is, he makes *me* feel worth it, too, despite the few words he says to me." _

[Amber's house, Saturday morning]

Walking into the messy living-room, Amber finds Rickie and Corey still asleep on the couches. "Good morning guys!"

Rickie and Corey grunt out some sort of greeting and start to stretch out and move a bit.

Saying what she needs to say, Amber shows no mercy. "Listen, one of you has to go over to Jordan Catalano's house to tell Angela that I called her mother last night. The poor girl will be in a lot of trouble if Patty finds out what *really* happened last night…"

"I know I'm not going…" Rayanne walks in the room.

"I know, Angel. It's still too awkward, I guess." Amber continues, "So, Rickie or Corey, please get of your butts, and go warn Angela before she returns home to face the Spanish Inquisition!"

Rickie protests. "I don't, like, *own* a car. Or even a driver's license, for that matter."

Corey says, "I don't mind driving up there, but I don't know her that well. So, you wanna come along Rickie?"

"Sure, why not." Getting up from the couch, Rickie stretches out a little more. He and Corey walk out the door; ready to make the drive over to Jordan's house.

Plopping down on the couch, Rayanne realises her feeling of triumph is being greatly overshadowed by a hung-over feeling, and *not* just from the booze she had. It was such a rush being on that stage, hearing the audience hold its breath because she *had* them. She enchanted them. She was actually good enough to shut other people up.

So, why did she have to get all liquored-up again afterwards? Why couldn't she have just enjoyed the natural high she was feeling, the adrenalin pumping through her vanes? And why did she have to get locked inside school, with Brian Krakow of all people? Why did she let him touch her?

If the cops hadn't shown up when they did, there's no telling how far she would have gone with him. It's like, all boundaries fade when she's been drinking. She just doesn't care anymore. That's how things got out of hand with Jordan as well.

It's just, Brian seemed like, so eager, so easy to please too, so innocent. Why did she play with him, toy with his feelings and emotions? Even he deserves better than some drunk-out-of-her-mind-chick. It's like, she doesn't like who she has become anymore.

She never would have thought she could have recollected last night without loathing what she did to Brian, but she can. The only loathing she does feel, is for herself, and herself alone, how ironic is that?

[Chase's house, Saturday morning]

In the kitchen Patty is holding the phone, dialling Amber's number. Waiting for Amber to pick up, Patty's eyes keep scanning the place uneasily. "Oh hi, Amber, it's Patty!"

Amber sounds surprised. "Oh hi Patty!"

Shifting around the kitchen nervously, Patty continues, "So, I was just checking to make sure Angela and Rayanne are fine. Because, if I may say so, honestly, you gave me a sleepless night, last night."

"Patty, I told you not to worry! They're fine, both of them!"

"So, umm, can you please put Angela on the phone?"

Amber answers hastily, "Oooh, Patty, you know *teens*, right? They're both still sound asleep! And you know what happens when you wake them up, don't you?"

Her eyes rolling in their sockets, Patty sighs. "Boy, don't get me started…"

"Just trust me, Patty. Angela's fine. You'll see her whenever she's ready!"

Hoping Amber is right, Patty is aware this call won't ease her mind. "I know, I know. Thank you, Amber. Have a nice day. Bye now!"

"You're welcome, and you too. Bye bye!"

Suddenly Graham walks in, startling Patty. "Oh, Graham, you scared me!"

"Who were you talking to?"

"Oh, no one."

"You called Amber, didn't you?"

"I did no such thing!" Walking away from her husband, Patty tries to keep her flushed cheeks from his sight.

"Patty, I know you. You are worried about Angela, aren't you? You worry when you have no control over the situation."

Freezing on the spot, Patty looks at Graham pleadingly. "Well, I'm allowed to worry, aren't I? And with this Amber-person, any *normal* mother would worry along with me!"

"Yes, you're allowed to worry, but Angela's not a dumb kid. She doesn't get carried away that quickly, and she doesn't copy her friends' behaviour. She's a good kid, and I feel kind of sorry for her, that you don't want give her the benefit of the doubt."

"No, it's not that I don't trust her, it's just… I don't know…"

"Trust her, Patty. Have faith in her judgement. *You* raised her after all."

"But what if I failed, Graham?"

"You did not fail, Patty. In fact, *we* did not fail, at raising our daughters. But right now, I have to go over to the restaurant. Please, stop worrying, and do something that'll take your mind of this, promise me?"

"I promise. Have a good day, honey." While her mind is still wandering, Patty gives him a reassuring smile.

After kissing his wife goodbye, Graham leaves through the backdoor.

[Outside Jordan's house]

In front of Jordan Catalano's house Corey parks his car, and Rickie climbs out. He walks up to the door and rings the doorbell. No answer. Rickie waits for a while but grows impatient. He notices Jordan's car, so it means he has to be home. Rickie rings the bell another time and steps back a few yards. He starts yelling, "Jordan! Angela!" Awaiting any reaction, nothing happens.

"I wouldn't want to be like, disturbed either, if I were in there with Jordan Catalano."

Rickie walks back to the car, steps inside and asks Corey, "Hey, maybe we can leave Angela a note instead? Have you got like, a pen and some paper?"

Corey opens up the dashboard cupboard and grabs out a notepad and a pen. "Here you are!"

"Thanks." Rickie starts writing a note to Angela, pauses, reads the whole note again, and then returns the notepad and pen to Corey. "Thanks."

Rickie walks over to the front-door again. He rings the doorbell once more; just in case. He waits for a while, after which he decides to slide the note under the door. He doesn't really believe in God, but closes his eyes and folds his hands together, praying Angela will find the note in time.

Back inside the car he tells Corey, "We did our best. We can't like, wait around all day, hoping they will ever come out that door. I know *I* wouldn't!"

"I guess I'd do the same thing…" Corey grins, starts the car and they drive back to Amber's place.

[At the restaurant place]

The ceilings and walls are painted totally, and the floors are being delivered today. Pointing and gesturing, Graham talks to the workers about the flooring. He walks up to Hallie while the workers are beginning to lay the wooden floors.

"So Hallie, how was your date with my brother? Where did he take you?"

"The date was nice, very nice. He brought me to this cosy little Italian restaurant, you know, the kind with the red-white chequered tablecloths. We had a very romantic evening, and a very lovely dinner. Though I couldn't stop myself comparing the dishes to *your* cooking…"

"I'm glad you two had a good time. Hmm, I know what you mean; I can't have a normal dinner at a restaurant anymore without determining the foods. I tend to find inspiration in some recipe, or even the décor. This restaurant is messing with our heads!"

"I know what you mean, Graham. But we're finally getting somewhere! Look around you! How long do you think it will be until we're open for business?" Feeling proud, Hallie looks around the restaurant.

"That's hard to say. Depends on how soon the furniture and kitchen supplies will be delivered, I guess. But Hallie, we still don't have a name yet…"

"Ooh, I know! I've been wondering and pondering, but so far… At first I thought it would have to do something with the mermaids' statue, but that limits our options to a nautical theme, or a fairytale theme. And since we have agreed not to limit ourselves to sea-foods alone, option one is dismissed. And a fairytale theme seems so lame…"

"Well, I've been thinking it through as well. We want to give our guests a taste-pleasing experience, right? We want them to think of the food as divine or heavenly. We want them to experience an outer-body trip, and since I *don't* intend to do that by making magic mushrooms, we'll have to have an insinuating name." Graham looks at Hallie provocative.

Hallie closes her eyes. "Yeah, I'm seeing it, feeling it; but how to describe it?"

Graham whispers to her, "How about: 'Seventh Heaven'?"

Hallie lets the name sink in first. "Yes, Graham. I think that's exactly right!"

"Well, I'm glad you agree. Thank you. Now we're sure about the name, we can order our sign, our receipts, our placemats, etc. It's probably gonna take some time for them to come up with a good logo and such."

"Yeah, so, are you gonna contact them? Try to make an appointment during the evening or weekend for me to approve things, okay? Oh, but wait! Not tonight, of course." Hallie points her fingers at his chest.

"Hallie, I'm well aware of you working hours, so I'll keep them in mind. And umm, what's so important tonight you can't be here?"

"Another date with your brother, of course!"

[Jordan's house]

Sitting at the kitchen table, Angela enjoys the sight of Jordan fixing her something to eat. "I didn't know you could cook?"

"Yeah, well, kinda. You can hardly call it like, cooking." Jordan smiles shyly.

"So, is your dad out of town for business?"

"No. He's like, visiting his brother." Jordan tucks his hair behind his ear.

"So, do you get along with him? I mean, I used to be like *big* buddies to my dad, until my breasts got in the way…"

Jordan's hands hold still for a moment. "Well, umm, he's not that interested in me, or something."

"I'm sorry. I mean, it must be hard not having your mom around, and being ignored by your dad as well."

"Yeah well, it's like, better this way." Jordan continues cooking.

"How can it be better this way? I know my parents can like, be a real pain in the ass sometimes; but in the end I guess I'm like glad they're there for me, and support me and stuff."

Facing Angela, Jordan tells her, "You see, my dad, he, umm…" He licks his lips and continues, "He used to smack me around the house, so…" His back is being turned on Angela again.

Shock turns Angela's face white, nailing her to the seat for a moment. When the first shock subsides, she walks up to Jordan. Wrapping her arms around him, she whispers, "I'm so sorry for you, Jordan. I don't really know what to say to you… Except that you don't deserve it, and I *really* don't get it. I'll always be there for you, I promise."

Jordan cradles himself in her embrace and mumbles, "Thanks, Angel...a"

_Angela VO: "__Being here with Jordan has taught me so many new things, that I am like never gonna be my old self again. It's like all the things Jordan told me, changed me even more than losing my virginity did. All this knowledge, about Jordan Catalano and his parents, is like the beginning of a new era. He must have faith in me, in *us* even, for sharing all these private things." _

"_I am beginning to understand why he acts the way he does and I am regretting all those times in the past I blamed him for being 'like this', because now I know why he is 'like this'. His mother abandoned him, and his father used to smack him around the house. He does not know how to have a normal relationship, because he has never seen examples of it, or experienced any. Jordan Catalano was never loved, and never wanted. I will put an end to that, but I know I can't do it all at once. I don't want to scare him off, so I have to take things slow. I know I shouldn't expect any miracles from his side, either; but it's okay, because now I know *why*." _

"_Knowing this, knowing Jordan Catalano, has taught me something very important: *never* judge a book by its cover."_

[Brian Krakow's house]

Sitting in his darkroom, Brian develops the pictures he took last night. Besides having a head-ache because of the liquor he had, his mind is not really with his actions today. He keeps thinking back about what happened between Rayanne and him.

He thinks she loathes him, and she really doesn't care who she has sex with, but would anything have happened if she really *hated* him? She must like him at least a little, right? She's not that self-esteem-less, is she?

And what if, the cops hadn't shown up when they did? Would she have gone further? Would *they* have gone further?

Like he recently discovered them, Brian keeps examining his fingers. Like he is trying to find some trace of evidence of where they have touched Rayanne's leg. That wonderfully smooth and soft, yet firm leg.

"Come on, Krakow, snap out of it!" Brian slaps himself in the face, not condoning his mind wandering off constantly. He takes a look at some of the pictures that are almost dry, and finds a picture of Rayanne on stage.

What *is* it about her? Is it just some sort of physical attraction, like those cases in which hatred turns to passion? Or is it more? When did his feelings for Rayanne Graff change? Why is he suddenly so obsessed with her? She's everything he is not! They are completely incompatible, they inhabit different planets. She's even further out of reach to him, than Angela is…!

He's like dying to tell someone, but who is he gonna tell? Nobody will believe him! He can't tell Rickie, Angela or Sharon. Come to think of it, he hardly has any friends.

[Jordan's house, Saturday afternoon]

On the couch, Angela is sitting on Jordan's lap. "You make a mean omelette, Jordan Catalano!"

"Thanks…"

"But… I guess I should go home." Her facial expression changes into a sad one.

"Yeah, I guess so. I have like, band rehearsal later, so. Need a lift?"

"Okay, but maybe you have to drop me off at the corner or something, 'cause I wasn't supposed to see you today, or even worse, yesterday…"

"Good thinking…"

The kisses and touches between Jordan and Angela don't seize to stop, the feelings are consuming them. Just before things threaten to get out of hand again, Angela withdraws her lips from Jordan's hungry mouth.

"I *have* to go. We could go on like this forever, but I have to go home at some point…"

"Can't you like, tell your mom, you're staying away another night?" Jordan's lips are caressing her neck, his tongue is drawing circles, lower and lower.

Angela tilts her head back but shoots it right back up. "Jordan! Stop it! I don't think so, no. You're *evil*, you know that?!" She slaps him playfully on his chest. "Stop trying to seduce me to stay, 'cause you'll be sorry if I never *ever* leave again…"

"Having sex with you like, all the time, doesn't sound too bad." Jordan's lips brush over her cheek, until they have reached her lips again. Eagerly Jordan starts to kiss Angela, playfully, passionately, opening up her lips and thrusting his tongue inside her hot, wet mouth, in search of hers. Surrendering to his kisses, Angela joins in the game. For the umpteenth time that weekend Jordan and she explore each other's bodies, until they end up making love.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All flustered and partially dressed Angela gets up from the couch where she and Jordan were having sex. She walks to the bathroom in the hall, when her eye is drawn to a piece of paper on the doormat. Reaching out to pick it up, Angela sees her name written on it. Opening up the note she reads its contents.

_Dear Angela,_

_How was it with Jordan Catalano? You *have* to tell me everything later!_

_Anyway, Amber asked me to warn you! When Rayanne didn't come home last night, Amber called your mom, asking about Rayanne. Amber told your mom that you *weren't* missing, and were fine. We came to Amber's apartment while she was still on the phone, to let her know Rayanne was trapped inside school! (Yes, like, again.) So, Amber like, told your mom that Rayanne had been found after all, and was alright. (She sent the cops to free Rayanne, who had been locked in there with Brian Krakow, poor guy.)_

_Anyway, Amber thought your mom was suspicious, so beware!!!_

_Love, Rickie_

"Jordan! You'd better me get me home right now…" Angela shouts in the direction of the living-room.

She fixes her clothes and hair, but she can't help to smell the scent of *sex* all over her body… Nice as it is, she doubts her parents will be thrilled by it...

Entering the living room, Jordan has fallen asleep on the couch. The sight of Jordan Catalano all sleepy on the couch, after having sex with *her*, is something she wants to remember forever. He looks so sweet, so innocent. Quietly, she sits down next to him and kisses his eyelids. Jordan awakes and opens up one eye.

"Jordan? Will you take me home, please? I'm a little worried. You see, Rickie left me a note, saying that my mom is suspicious. So I guess I'd better get home fast, before she sends a search party after me…"

[The Chase's house, Saturday afternoon]

The doorbell rings while Graham is preparing dinner in the kitchen. He walks up to the door, opening it to find Brian standing outside. "Hey Brian."

"Mr Chase, I need to talk to someone, is it, like, okay if I talk to you?"

Graham swings the door open. "Sure Brian, come on in. What did you want to talk about?"

Brian's voice sounds more like a whisper. "It's kind of personal, you see…"

"Just follow me into the kitchen, we won't be disturbed there." Graham leads the way to the kitchen.

"You know we had this talk, like, about wallpapers, some time ago?"

"Yes, I remember…" Graham looks at Brian worried; that conversation was *very* vague, if he remembers correctly.

"Well, what if there's like, this wallpaper you have actually never liked, but it's still intriguing in a weird kind of way. And then there's this other wallpaper you still like, you know, the expensive one you really, really want, but simply can't afford. But the weirdly intriguing wallpaper is like, showing you pieces of itself you never knew it had, and it turns out that that wallpaper maybe isn't so weird after all. And you can afford it, and better yet, it has like, spontaneously, clung to your wall, like for a brief moment. And then, just when you've like gotten to appreciate the wallpaper, it comes off, and disappears, denying it was ever *on* your wall. What does that mean, Mr Chase?"

"Brian, as I said before, this isn't about wallpapers, is it? But if you ask me, that weird wallpaper doesn't quite know what it wants. It's not reliable, so to speak. If you're happy with wallpaper that visits your *walls* every now and then, there's nothing wrong with it. But don't expect the wallpaper to stay any longer, because I'm guessing, it won't. Maybe it will not come back at *all*, it was like a one-night-wall-cling-thing."

"Wow, it's amazing that you actually like, got what I was talking about. So, you're saying, I shouldn't count on that wallpaper?"

"Yes, that's what I'm saying. Have fun with it, but don't expect anything from it. And something tells me chasing *after* it won't do you any good, because this wallpaper will only come and go when it pleases, not when *you* want it to. You see, it sounds like it hates being stuck on the same wall forever." Graham can't help but smile at him.

"Thanks, Mr Chase, for clearing that up. I'll be going home now and well, think about some wallpaper…"

"Brian? Does this girl have a name?" Graham's curiosity is awakened now.

Brian flushes and stutters, "Umm, no, no name, sorry."

"Good luck with her then. Don't get *too* attached, you know?"

"I won't. I hope. Though she keeps intriguing me…" Absent-minded, he walks out of the kitchen, towards the door. "I'll let myself out, thanks again. Bye."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Just a little while after Brian left, Angela walks in through the back-door, smiling and greeting her father, "Hi, dad!" She kisses him on the cheek and tosses her bag on the table.

"Hi, honey. So, how was it at Rayanne's?"

"Oh, you know. Okay, I guess. The party wasn't as *wild* as the other one, luckily." She sits down at the kitchen table.

"Hi honey! I thought I heard you come in!" Patty walks over to her daughter and gives her a kiss on the fore-head. "So, how was the party?"

Angela answers cautiously, "Okay, I guess. Nothing *wild*, just fun, you know, hanging out together."

Patty hesitates before she speaks. "You know… Amber called me last night."

"Oh?" Angela doesn't know if she should act surprised or not, and it's kind of freaking her out.

"Patty, don't…" Disturbed, Graham eyes his wife, afraid of where this conversation might lead to.

"Graham, you stay out of this. I want to know what happened last night, I have a *right* to know!" Patty looks at her husband furiously; he has no right to let Angela know they're not united on this.

Patty directs her face towards Angela again, somewhat calmer sounding. "Anyway, Rayanne wasn't home yet, but she assured me that *you* were fine. I thought you and Rayanne were going home with Amber?"

"Yeah, we did, I mean, we were supposed to, but then Rickie invited Corey over, and Corey said he would bring us, so we let Amber go ahead, and went with Corey instead." The nerves are kicking in, and Angela feels if she keeps on rambling that her mother just *maybe* won't notice the missing pieces. Or maybe her mother *will*, because she is blabbing too much.

"So, what happened to Rayanne then? I don't understand it, honey. You, Corey and Rickie went ahead?"

"No, umm, yes, I mean. Yes, Corey brought Rickie and me to Amber's already, while Rayanne stayed behind for a little while. You see, she met this guy, and she was, you know…"

"So you left Rayanne behind with some strange guy and went ahead to her house?"

"Well, when you put it like *that*, it sounds kinda harsh. But, yeah, Rayanne knew the guy, and she *insisted* we leave her alone. She would get him to drive her home, later."

"And you're positive that you weren't there with her? I don't know, with say, Jordan Catalano?"

Angela raises her voice. "Yes, I'm positive I wasn't there, with Jordan Catalano! He wasn't even *there*, remember?"

"Are you sure about that? Because we saw his car, and it's not like his car is easily mistaken for someone else's, that's for sure." Patty folds her arms in front of her.

"Okay, so he *was* there. What's the big deal? It's not like I knew he was coming anyway." Flushing, Angela puts a lock of hair behind her ear.

"And yes, ofcourse we talked, for a little while. But I *swear* mom, that was it! I didn't stay out there with Rayanne!" That part was actually true, so she wasn't totally lying.

"So, you're saying that you *met* Jordan, talked for a while, and then you, Corey and Rickie went to Amber's, and left Rayanne behind."

"Yes, mom, that's what I'm saying."

"So, what did you tell Amber when you got there?"

"The truth, that Rayanne like, met someone and was coming home a little later. But I guess, when it had been, like, a while, and Rayanne still hadn't come back, she got worried and called you." Angela's eyes poke at her mom's.

Much resembling an advocate in a court-room, Patty walks around the kitchen and continues questioning the suspect. "But why would she call *me*, while you guys knew where Rayanne was hanging out?"

"Don't ask *me* mother, Amber was, like, totally spacing. She had a few too many of those cocktails, I guess." Angela tries to act nonchalant, even if she is starting to freak out because of the interrogation.

"You know, this whole story still doesn't make any sense, at all."

Graham interrupts his wife again. "Patty, Amber doesn't make any sense, remember? Not ever!"

Ignoring her husband's remark, Patty continues, "I still don't know what to make of it. Angela, I give you the benefit of the doubt this time, but *next* time I won't be this tolerant, I tell you! I won't let you turn into some Rayanne, hanging around with strange guys at late hours."

"First you tell me to make up to her, and *now* you're telling me you don't want me to hang out with her?! You know, I just don't get you!"

"Becoming her friend again has nothing to do with becoming *her*!"

"And *this* coming from the mouth of someone who used to be a friend-betraying Rayanne herself…?! That's just freaking *great*!" Really pissed now, Angela gets up and walks out of the kitchen.

Patty shouts after her, "I am your *mother*! Don't speak to me like that!"

Collapsing on a chair, Patty supports her head with her hand. "Oh God, I sound just like my *own* mother. I tried so hard to prevent this, and now it's inevitable: I have become the *one* thing I had sworn I would never become."

**To be continued…**


	8. Episode 27: Cherski's Choice

**Episode 27:**** Cherski's Choice**

Wordcount: app. 5000

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Sharon is late and worries what to do, so Angela helps her out; causing some misunderstandings. Rayanne gets interested in several new things, while Brian has a new interest of his own. Camille and Patty discuss Angela and Patty's argument. The restaurant is almost ready to open up.

[Cherski's place]

_Sharon VO: "Today it's been a little over two weeks __ago since Kyle and I had unsafe sex. According to my normal cycle, I should have gotten my period, like, yesterday. The stress is driving me nuts! My boobs look bigger, my belly is bloated and I feel nauseous like, all day long! Or does it only *look* like my boobs are bigger, and my belly is bloated? And maybe I'm just feeling nauseous because of the stress? _

_I have the feeling everybody is like, staring at me, knowing what's wrong with me. _

_I seriously don't know what to do anymore, or who to tell. Is it too soon to buy a pregnancy-test? But then what; what if I *am* pregnant? Do I really want to know…?"_

Grunting, Sharon gathers her books, stuffs them in her bag and barges out of her room, down the stairs. "Bye, mom, I'm leaving for school!"

"Honey? You didn't even have breakfast yet!" Camille comes running out of the kitchen.

"I don't have time, mom, sorry. I'll see you this afternoon." As Sharon walks through the door, she catches the sight of Jordan Catalano's car pulling up in front of the Chase's house. Angela and Jordan must be like seriously in love, 'cause there hasn't gone by a single day during the past week she *didn't* see him pick Angela up.

[Mr Katimski's classroom]

"Gee whiz! Check out this latest copy of our very own 'Liberty school-paper'!" Mr Katimski is handing out the school-paper to every student in his class. "Of course, this issue features a special on the um, play we did recently, a little production called… um, 'Our Town'…"

"Woohoo!" Raising her fist in the air, Rayanne hollers.

"Yes, Rayanne Graff, the play was a big hit, thanks to your acting, amongst others, gee whiz…" Mr Katimski takes back his seat in front of the class.

Most of the students start to look through their copies of the paper. Flipping through the pages, Rayanne stumbles upon a picture of herself on the stage, breathtakingly gorgeous. Feeling caught in some way, she looks around edgy all of a sudden; like the way she looks in that picture is private or something. It's like she is meant to be seen this way by *one* person alone. Staring back at her is not just any picture of herself; it clearly displays the feelings of the eye of the beholder. Looking up to see if anyone else has reached that page yet, Rayanne catches Angela's surprised look.

"Rayanne…" Angela is stumped for words.

"Yeah, I know Angela, like, you know, that Krakow can sure take a picture, right?" Rayanne can't find the words to express herself. She feels the need to defend herself even, like it's *her* fault Brian took this picture. Like it's *her* fault he obviously looks at her in this way. She has nothing to do with it, it's not like she encouraged him, or anything. Yeah, like, afterwards she may have, but she wouldn't have if she knew… this.

"Brian captured your *soul*, Rayanne, he truly did. You were amazing that night, and his camera recorded that. You were, like, pure, and deep; and it was like, you lowered your fences and showed your inner self. But you still managed to look so… mysterious and untouchable." Angela can't get over how many emotions are present in this picture, displayed on Rayanne's face. Would Brian even be aware of it? Was it, like, a lucky shot, or is there more to it than meets the eye?

"Wow, and you like, *just* thought that up?" Rayanne raises her eyebrow.

"I guess I did. Don't know where that came from, weird…"

Mr Katimski walks up to Rayanne's table. "Umm, Miss Graff, can we maybe um, talk, after class?"

"Whatever, as long as it's nothing serious…" Rayanne shifts in her seat.

"No, no, no, more like, the opposite!" Nodding at Rayanne, Mr Katimski continues to wander through the classroom, pointing out things in the school-paper, and talking to his students enthusiastically.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After a while the bell rings, everybody but Rayanne takes off. Climbing on top of her table and folding her legs, Rayanne nervously eyes Mr Katimski. "So, what's up, Mr K?"

"Have you ever considered, like, making a career out of acting? I mean, gee whiz, have you got any idea how talented you are? It's not too soon to think about what you want to be, you know, when you're like supposed to be grown up." Mr Katimski waves his hands around as to shoo away the invisible flies he sees.

"Me? Talented? You're kidding, right?! Jeez, I don't really know like, what I wanna be. I just thought, you know, I'd never be able to like, go and study somewhere. I'm not that bright or anything, I guess."

"Do you know, Rayanne, that there are schools where they teach you how to act? And um, never call yourself dumb." Mr Katimski raises his index-finger at Rayanne. "I'm sure if you would um, attend some classes, you'd amaze yourself."

"So, this, like, acting-school, is it like that school in 'Fame'? And umm, do you need like a high-school-diploma for it?"

"It is indeed like that school um… from 'Fame'. And you sure do need a um… diploma to get in there, Miss Graff, you sure do. If you'd like, I would be happy to collect some brochures."

"Yeah, that sounds like, cool, I guess. So, can I like, go now?" Rayanne can't wait to tell her friends she's found her *goal* in life; becoming an actress!

"Yes, Miss Graff, you are excused!"

Grabbing a lollipop from her bag; Rayanne dashes off.

Outside of the classroom Rickie is hanging around, waiting for her. "Hey, so, like, what did Mr Katimski want from you?"

Rayanne takes the lollipop from her mouth. "Oh, you like, waited for me! Well… it seems Mr K thinks I would like, make a good actress or something. And did you know that there are like, *schools* where they teach you that?"

"Oh, that's great! I mean, you *seriously* rocked the play, so I couldn't agree more! But I already knew that there are schools for it; I kinda assumed maybe you like, knew too."

"Duh! If I *knew*, I would have like, known what to do with my life like, *ages* ago! Can you imagine a school where they like teach you how to act and stuff? Doing nothing but fun stuff all day long, singing, dancing…" Rayanne starts to sing and twirl around.

"Rayanne, it's not just like, fun all the time, you know? I'm sure you like, have to learn something besides singing and acting." Wondering about it; Rickie's face frowns. School is like, school, so it can't be like all fun, all the time. Or can it?

"Hey, maybe you could like, come along with me, you know? You can learn how to paint decors, and I'm sure there are like, many available gay men in a place like that…" Rayanne raises her eyebrows in a meaningful gesture.

Rickie flushes instantly. "Picking a school should have like, nothing to do with how many potential lovers I could have over there." A smile spreads across his face. "But you're right, Rayanne. A place like that has gotta be like, *swarming* with sensitive, alternative gay guys." He can just picture it and his eyes are glowing hopefully.

"Duh! So, you and me, drama school it is!" Rayanne holds up her lollipop like a superhero holds out his sword.

[Cherski's place]

"Camille! Where are you?" Patty just walked in the backdoor of the Cherski's.

"Patty? I'm coming down, wait…" Coming down the stairs, Camille greets Patty. "Hello neighbour. So, is Angela still mad at you?"

"Yes, she is. Although *mad* isn't the correct term, I suppose. She's still *ignoring* me. Whenever she wants something, she asks Graham instead. It's like I don't even exist anymore!"

"Have you tried talking to her?" Camille rubs Patty's shoulder.

"Yes, I have, but she just doesn't respond. It's hopeless, you know?"

"She'll turn around, you know teens, right? Can I get you a cup of coffee?" Camille guides the way into the kitchen.

"Yes, please. And tell me, was I *really* that wrong?" Patty follows her.

Pouring them two cups of coffee and putting them on the table, Camille takes a seat next to Patty.

"I wouldn't call it wrong, but part of me understands why Angela is still upset. Don't get me wrong, I would probably have done the exact same thing, but that doesn't make it *right* in her eyes, I guess."

"Well, I had a right to know what happened, didn't I?" The outline of the coffee-cup is being traced absent-mindedly by Patty's fingers.

"Yes, you did, and you still do. She's *your* daughter, for God's sake! You have a right to know where she hangs out, and who she hangs out with. Especially when it involves someone like Rayanne Graff, with that bad reputation of hers…"

"Exactly! Thank you for understanding! Any sane person would worry about their kid hanging out with Rayanne Graff!"

"But… in Angela's defence: she's a smart kid, you know? She has never let you down, or betrayed your trust, has she? She has always made smart calls when it comes to bad things. She doesn't follow her friends on their road to destruction. She doesn't drink, do drugs, or sleep around. She calls you when her friends are in trouble, without thinking twice of the consequences. I do think she deserves your trust, Patty. She has proven to you she has earned it."

"I guess you're right, Camille. I just never looked at her that way. Thanks, for making me feel so bad for distrusting my own daughter."

"I'm not attacking you, Patty. Just appreciate how Angela is; let it sink in for a moment. Sure, she has distanced herself from you, but don't all normal kids do that, during puberty? Didn't you do the exact same thing, during your puberty??"

"Oh boy, did I ever! Maybe that's the reason why I want to stay in control over Angela's life, because I'm worried she will treat me the same way I treated my mother."

After taking a few sips from her coffee, Camille continues. "If you try to stay in control over her, you will only push her farther away. Plus, you can't really compare the two of you, Patty. You had your adoption-issues to deal with as well. No wonder you resisted your mother!"

"That's true. And as far as I know, Angela's not adopted. I mean, I was there when she was born…! Although, with all the drugs they gave me you can never be too sure, ofcourse."

"Jeez, tell me about it! They give you enough drugs to sedate an elephant, but you're still in agonizing pain. If only our daughters would just realise what he have been through, bringing them into this world! They just don't appreciate us!"

"I know! It's like we're their personal slaves, forbidden to meddle with their lives, yet forbidden to have a life of our own!"

"Yeah, I know all about it. But Patty, we do have to take a step back from their lives, no matter how hard it is. It's only natural they want to find their own way, and we have to let them, even if that involves making horrible mistakes."

"Camille? Are you and Sharon okay?"

"She still seems so absent-minded; it's like, I can't get through to her. The past few weeks she has closed herself off and won't let me in. She's even hardly around in person. It's so unlike her, you know?!" Camille's face displays her concerns; Sharon has never pushed her away like this before, and it's hard. Like there's something terribly wrong, but she's afraid to tell her.

"She'll come around, Camille, don't worry. She's a teenager too, remember?" Trying to comfort Camille with a smile, Patty lays her hand on Camille's arm.

[Girls restroom]

_Sharon VO: "I think my imagination is getting the best of me, or is everybody really staring at me? Staring, because they can all tell I'm late,__ that I'm carrying a baby inside of my body. Does it show that much already? Or, is like, paranoia one of the side-effects of pregnancy? Or maybe, I'm just going insane, slowly. I don't know which one I prefer though…"_

"Sharon?" Angela gives Sharon a worried look as she walks into the girls' restroom. "Are you okay? You seem so pale!"

"Just like, pale? There's nothing else about me that like, seems unusual?" Sharon panics slightly.

"Well, no, nothing besides your unusually large…umm…hair…" Angela tries to evoke her friend a smile.

"Angela! Don't make fun of me! I don't know what to do anymore." Sharon lowers herself to the floor.

"What's wrong, Sharon? Oh, wait, don't tell me… You still didn't get your period?" Angela lowers herself on the floor next to Sharon.

"Yup, I'm officially late. And I don't know what to do." Sharon's eyes start to fill up with tears.

"Oh Shar, it's okay." Angela wraps her arms around Sharon. "Maybe we should get a pregnancy-test, just in case."

"I'm afraid, Angela! I can't raise a baby alone! I can't raise a baby *period*! I'm still in high-school for God's sake!"

"I know, I know. Hey, how about we skip next period, and we buy a test, huh? At least you'll know for sure…"

"You'd do that for me?" Sharon's face is all tear-stained.

Getting up, Angela stretches her hand out to help Sharon up. To swab off the mascara-smudges, Angela wipes her thumbs over Sharon's face. "Ofcourse I'd do that for you! So, let's go." They walk out holding hands.

[At the restaurant place]

Furniture is being delivered; Graham is inside stacking up tables and chairs. Hallie walks in greeting him. "Hello you!"

"Hey Hallie, well, all the furniture is almost inside. Wait till you see how the kitchen looks!" Enthusiastically, Graham guides Hallie towards the kitchen; in a week it has transformed from an empty space to an actual restaurant-kitchen with a cooking island and everything. Glowing with pride, Graham walks around; he can't wait to start some serious cooking here. Even though the furnaces, stoves, pots, pans and cutlery have never been used, he feels right at home.

"Wow! It's so beautiful Graham!" Hallie's hand glides over the shiny metal surfaces, like touching them will add to the feel of awe.

"Yeah, I know. I can't believe we're almost ready to open up, you know?! I can't wait to start cooking in here; to enrich our guest's senses."

"Yeah, I know! Only one week to go!"

"One week…Oh man, there's so much left to do!" For a blissful moment Graham forgot about all the things they still have to take care off before they're ready for business.

"We'll be fine, don't worry! I gave Neill some chores too; isn't it like, great he can help us both now?" Hallie's face lights up at the thought of Neill.

"We need all the help we can get, I know that much." Graham is slightly worried about Hallie assigning his brother tasks; he hopes they're not too important, because Neill has a tendency to let things slip his mind sometimes…

[In a drugstore, near school]

"Should I take this one, or maybe this one's better?" Sharon holds up two boxes with pregnancy-tests.

"Let's see, this one's cheaper, but that one contains *two* tests, so basically it's safer." Angela reads the directions on the boxes. "But, I don't know, it's like, your money, so."

"Why don't they like, just sell *one* kind? How do I know which one is better?"

"Come on, we'll just take this one." Grabbing the box containing two tests, Angela bumps into someone. "Oh, I'm sorry!" The box falls to the floor. Without really looking at it, the other person picks it up from the floor and hands it to her.

"Oh, hey, thanks, umm…"

When she finds out it's Shane's face she's staring into, Angela flushes instantly. Shane's the one with the drumsticks, who plays in the band with Jordan. And he just handed her back a pregnancy-test.

"Oh, it's you, I mean… Hey Shane." She puts a lock of hair behind her ear.

"Hey, Angela, so, how's it going?" Shane hits every possible surface he can with his drumsticks.

"Fine, fine, nothing special going on. So, how are you?" Pressing the pregnancy-test tightly against her chest and crossing her arms in front of it, Angela hopes Shane won't notice what it is.

"You know, just scoring some crisps!" Shane holds up a bag of crisps. "But umm, gotta split, so… see ya!" He takes off in the direction of the cash-register, pays for the crisps and leaves.

"Yeah, see you around." Angela turns around abruptly. "Now that was awkward. I am so hoping he didn't see what he just picked up from the floor for me! What do I tell Jordan?"

"Just tell him, you know, that it wasn't for you."

After paying for the test, they walk out the store, both flustered and quiet, all the way back to school.

[Yearbook room]

Brian is working on some picture layouts, when Delia walks up to him. "Hey Brian."

"Hey," Not interested, Brian continues what he's doing. There was a time he would have been interested in her, but now he can't seem to get Rayanne Graff of his mind.

"So, the pictures you took, you know, from the play, they were like, amazing!" Delia clings to the school-paper in her hands.

"Thanks. Some people are just, you know, like, photogenic." For a brief moment, Brian looks up at her, averting his eyes again swiftly.

"Oh, you mean, like Rayanne Graff! Yeah, well, if you like the slutty type, then I guess she would be like, *photogenic*."

"There's more to her than just being slutty. It's such a shame people only look at the surface."

"Yeah, Brian, that really *is* a shame, because it's what I did too, at first. Until someone told me off. So, I thought to myself: why not give him another chance, right? But as it turns out, you're only interested in dream-girls. The ones you will never have draw your attention. Reach for the stars, right? First Angela, now Rayanne. Boy, you must really *hate* yourself to keep falling for girls who don't even know you exist."

As the emotions wash over her, Delia bites her tongue. She has shown Brian too much of herself already, and wishes she hadn't. Trying to hold on to the last shred of dignity she has left, she walks away. Just outside the door she starts to sob and runs off.

Brian looks up surprised, like he doesn't even realise there was someone in here just now. Previously, Delia's words would have hit him, but now they don't. His mind is focused on someone else; and he doesn't understand why Delia gets all worked up about him. First, she likes him. Then, she ignores him. Now, she tries to talk to him again. Can't she make up her mind, and until that time, let him rest in peace? He doesn't need her charity, or pity. "Girls…"

"What about girls, Krakow?" Silently, Rayanne has walked in the Yearbook room, her fingers resting on the picture layouts Brian is working on.

"Nothing, I mean, this girl… She… Never mind." In his mind the right sentences come out without a problem, but being in the presence of *her*, his mind blocks. His mouth hesitates; the words come out sounding meaningless and infantile.

"Yeah Brian, like, never mind. So, those are some pretty good pictures you like, took. Got any more?" Rayanne's fingers slide over the layouts, coming closer to Brian with every inch.

"Yeah, I've got like *tons*. Wanna see them?" Brian searches his bag for the stack of pictures displaying Rayanne.

"Yeah, I wanna see them, but not like, now. Maybe some other time, you know."

Not knowing whether Brian has her figured out yet, Rayanne tries to come off as cool.

Intrigued he's looking at her, and she doesn't know if this has gone too far again. Messing with his head is fun, it's more fun than she's had in a *long* time. It's like; the reward is higher, or something. It's not just for the kick, or the adrenalin, or even the feeling of being alive. It's something more, something she can't quite grasp. He repulses her, but in a way, he draws her near. She likes his attention a little too much.

"Okay. Just, let me know then. I'll leave them like, in my locker or something." Wanting to get up, Brian realises he'll probably feel even more uncomfortable standing, so staying put seems like the best thing to do.

"Yeah… like, whatever." As mysteriously as she appeared, Rayanne has disappeared again; leaving Brian's head completely messed up.

[After school, in Jordan Catalano's car]

Jordan and Angela are making out, kissing each other deeply and intensely, their hands exploring each others bodies over and under their clothes.

"So, is your dad gonna be out of town any time soon again?" Angela gives Jordan a naughty grin. Making love in his car just isn't all that comfortable.

"Don't know. But like, maybe, you could stay over anyway?" Jordan tucks a strand of hair behind his ear.

"Are you serious? I mean, I just didn't think that would be an option."

"It's not like I ever asked him, or anything. I could like, you know, try." Jordan licks his lips.

"Jordan, I was only kidding. My mom and I still aren't talking to each other, so I can't. I mean, before we are at peace again, I'm afraid to bring up any parties and sleepovers, especially at Rayanne's."

From a distance Jordan's friend Shane is approaching the car. Knocking the door on Jordan's side, he casts Angela a glance, making her panic immediately.

"Hey, man," In an instant Jordan's posture changes. He's still not comfortable being with Angela around his friends.

"Got a minute?" Shane has opened the door and is sticking his head inside.

"Yeah, sure," Jordan gets up and closes the door.

Walking a little further, Shane and Jordan are talking to each other. Shane's head is facing Angela, and Jordan turns around occasionally. His face doesn't display any emotions of surprise or shock.

After a short while, Shane takes off and Jordan walks up to the car. Getting inside, he addresses Angela instantly. "He told me, like, umm, you were buying this like, pregnancy-test…" His eyes are staring at the steering-wheel in his hands.

"Jordan, it's not what you think." Angela flushes. "It's not for *me*, I swear. You have to believe me. I would never lie to you about something like that. It was for my friend, and I just like, went along to support her."

"Okay…"

"Okay? That's all you have to say? So, what are you saying; that you believe me?"

"Yeah, I do," His hand touches her face, his fingers caress her cheek.

"Well, thank you, I guess."

Over and over again, Angela is being astonished by Jordan. It's amazing that someone who has been hurt that deeply; opens up his heart to her so seemingly easy, and *completely*. His eyes show a kind of openness and childishness, directly leading the way to his soul, his heart even. His heart is so pure, despite all the pain he suffered, that Angela's heart swells with love once more. It's as if his faith in her is like the most precious gift he can think of to give to her, without even knowing it. He doesn't even have a clue how eager he is to show her his deepest feelings. Jordan's innocence and expectances move her beyond belief.

"Umm, just like, one question, it's not Graff, is it?" Jordan seems slightly worried.

"No, thank God, it's not Rayanne! I mean, can you imagine the drama if it would be her?! She wouldn't even know who the father is! It could be, like --" Angela wants to say '_anyone'_, but then reality hits her *so* hard it feels like's she being punched in her stomach.

Slowly, she turns to look at Jordan. "It could be, like, *you*."

Falling silent, the memories she has tucked away deeply rise to the surface again. Imagine, if Rayanne and Jordan had had unprotected sex as well. Rayanne could have been pregnant indeed; with Jordan Catalano's baby.

That thought actually stings like hell, and it's making her want to get away from Jordan; like, this instant. She had forgotten how much he and Rayanne had hurt her. He had enchanted her into seeing only his good sides, but where there's good, there has to be bad, for keeping the balance.

"I'm sorry, Jordan. I think I'm gonna take the bus anyway. I'll see you around." Picking up her backpack, Angela opens up the car-door.

Stopping her, Jordan lays his hand on her arm. Even though she's looking down at it, her brain doesn't seem to register it.

"Angela, I'm sorry. Not just for, like, bringing it up. I mean…" Getting a hold of Angela's chin, Jordan forces her to look at him. "I'm sorry I like, let it happen."

"I know you are Jordan, and it means so much to me you're telling me again. But it happened anyway, and it still hurts to think of it…" Angela's eyes radiate the pain she's feeling. "Bye…" Drawing in her arm from Jordan's grip, Angela climbs out of the car.

"Bye…" Jordan's voice is drenched with pain and regret; his head bangs on the steering wheel several times, displaying his agony.

[After school, Cherski's place]

Having locked herself in the bathroom, Sharon's eyes are fixated on the pregnancy-test in her hands.

_Sharon VO: "So, this little test could like, *change* my life forever. Should I __like, take the test, or not? It could end my misery, but it could be like, the beginning of a lot of misery as well. I'm not ready for the result yet; but not knowing is like, slowly killing me as well. I've gotta be a big girl about this; I felt big enough to have sex, now I've gotta deal with the consequences of it. I can handle this, I just have to. Maybe the test-result will be negative anyway; and let me get on with my life. I have to do it now, for my sanity."_

Taking the test out of its package, Sharon carefully reads the instructions. After a deep breath, she follows the handlings she's supposed to do. When she's done, she paces around the bathroom totally anxious, waiting for the result. Who knew that a few measly minutes could last like, an eternity?! Her eyes keep flicking over to her watch, but it's like the hands of her watch have stopped moving.

Finally the moment has arrived. Sharon's trembling fingers pick the test up from the cup and her eyes take in the result.

She's pregnant. No doubt about it.

Breaking down, Sharon cries her eyes out; her body slumping down to the bathroom-floor. Her life is over before it has begun. The pain and disbelief have taken over her brain, she can't think straight anymore.

A soft knock on the bathroom-door startles her from her misery. "Sharon? It's me, Angela. Are you okay?"

Getting up to let Angela in; Sharon's tear-stained face tells Angela everything she needs to know.

"Oh no, Sharon, I'm so sorry for you…" Wrapping her arms around Sharon's body, they're both sobbing and crying.

After a while Sharon eyes Angela, stuttering through her tears, "I can't – I can't keep this ba-ba-baby, Angela! What should I do?"

"I don't know, Sharon, I really don't." Feeling immensely sorry for Sharon; Angela can't imagine what she would do in a situation like this. She feels bad she can't help her friend out; it's *her* choice after all.

"I think I'm gonna have an abortion; it's like…" Pausing for a moment, Sharon bursts into tears again. After a while the sobbing subsides and she continues, "I have no other choice, do I?"

"Sharon, maybe we like, should ask someone's advice first. Someone who will know what your options are. Like maybe, the guidance councillor, or your doctor or something."

"I already know, Angela. I can have this baby and keep it, letting it ruin my life in the process; hating myself, Kyle *and* this baby for the rest of my pathetic, miserable, unfulfilling and unschooled life. Or, I can have it and give it up for adoption; feeling sorry about my choice for the rest of my life, wondering if it will be okay. Or, I can just have an abortion before it turns into a little human and get on with my life like nothing ever happened."

"Are you sure about this?" Sharon makes it sound so easy; like she has done it a thousand times before. Could *she* ever live with herself, knowing she had bluntly removed the little baby Jordan and she made out of love?!

"I'm positive Angela. I'll call them as soon as possible. But, would you please come with me? When I… you know…?!"

"I'll be there for you, promise."

Totally contradicting the nauseating feelings going through her mind and body, Angela gives her friend a reassuring smile. Even if she can relate a little to Sharon's choice it's still hard to grasp, but this is *her* choice. Realising it's the least she can do, she will support her friend whenever she can.

**To be continued…**

13


	9. Episode 28: Changes

**A/N: Unbeta'd again, I'll replace it a.s.a.p!**

*****

_Angela VO: "__This weekend, many things in my life are about to change. This morning I am going to the abortion-clinic with Sharon, and after that her life will never be the same again. It's a heavy weighing secret for her to carry around, all alone. It has been a wake-up-call to me as well; life can just like, *happen*, to you, you know? _

"_And tomorrow my dad's restaurant will finally open up, but it's like; the consequences haven't even dawned on me until now. He will probably be away almost every evening, weekend and holiday; and he won't be able to cook for us anymore. Did my mom realise all that when she let him do this? I know I'm supposed to be excited for my dad, and in a way I am, because I know his heart is really in it; but what about *us*?"_

[On the school-bus, Friday morning]

Staring ahead quietly, Angela and Sharon are sitting next to each other in a bus-seat. When the bus arrives at the stop, they get off with the rest of the kids. Instead of walking towards the school they take a left turn, walking *away* from school.

Spotting the two girls, Brian Krakow shouts after them, "Hey, where are you going?"

Having known them since they were little, Brian knows neither of them is the school-skipping kind. So either they have gone extremely bad, like overnight; or something serious is up. A nauseating feeling overwhelms him; even though his mind has been taken over by Rayanne lately, his feelings for Angela have remained the same, unfortunately.

"None of your business, Brian. And don't tell anyone you saw us, or you'll regret it!" After Angela's irritated look at Brian, Angela and Sharon walk ahead to another bus-stop, arm in arm.

It's not a good thing Brian spotted them, but this was the only way she could think of to do this. They had to act normal, so they rode the bus to school. From here on, they will transfer onto another bus to the abortion-clinic. Angela considered asking Jordan to take them over there, but Sharon didn't want to get anyone else involved, which Angela could understand.

Silently, they wait around by the bus stop for a while, until the bus arrives. They hop on and are being taken through the city; through familiar and unknown streets. Sharon hesitates for a while when they arrive at the stop near the clinic, Angela gets up.

"Having a change of heart, Shar?" Even Angela feels nauseous; she can't even begin to imagine what Sharon must be feeling right now.

"I'm still not sure about this, Angela. Is it really the right thing to do? My tummy hurts from all this stressing…"

"I don't know; no matter how hard it is, it has to be *your* choice. I can't tell you what to do." Angela's not sure about her role either; should she push Sharon to do this anyway, or should she let her back out?

"No, I'm going," Standing up resolutely, Sharon gets off from the bus; Angela follows her.

Silently again, they walk up to the clinic, Angela's arm wrapped around Sharon. When they reach the door of the depressing looking building, Sharon hesitates again. "I can't go through with this…" Leaning against the wall, Sharon closes her eyes, like it hurts to look at the world.

Not feeling able to come up with the right words to ease Sharon's pain, or soften her choice, Angela just eyes her friend patiently.

Breathing in deeply, Sharon opens her eyes. "I have to do this. I don't have any other option. I'm going in, right now."

[In Mr Katimski's classroom]

"Ah, Miss Graff, what a lovely surprise it is, to have you in our midst yet again!" Looking around the classroom, Mr Katimski notices a few empty seats instead of the usually uninhabited seat Rayanne is sitting in.

"Didn't you bring your friends along? Or do you take turns to visit my class perhaps?" Jokingly, Mr Katimski mocks Rayanne's presence, while questioning the unauthorized absence of Angela and Sharon.

"Maybe they're like, sick, or something," Still wondering what could be wrong with Angela or Sharon, or even *both* of them, Brian answers.

"You think she's like, sick? She like, didn't want me to give her a ride this morning." While Jordan is thinking about what could be wrong, his forehead wrinkles up a little.

Almost never, has Angela said no to a ride from Jordan before. Lately, she's been acting kinda different towards him, since that time they talked about her pregnant friend and their talk ended up being about Graff again. Maybe she was lying to him anyway? Maybe she *is* the one who is pregnant?

"I'm sure it's nothing, they're probably fine," Brian's words seem to have the sole purpose of reassuring his own aching mind. He doesn't care about Jordan Catalano's worries regarding one measly missed ride to school from Angela.

"Gee whiz, maybe they just have a bad hair-day, who knows?!" Mr Katimski answers light-heartedly. "Now, let's get on with umm, English, yes, English, I think." Seeming to think even harder than usual, Mr Katimski causes some kids in the class to giggle.

"Does anyone know… Oh my, I'm not feeling too well…" Lowering himself to his seat, Mr Katimski's hand reaches for his head, his other hand clinging to the edge of the table for support. "Is it me, or is it getting darker in here…?" Squinting his eyes, he shakes his head.

"Mr Katimski, are you alright?" Having run up to Mr Katimski, Rickie grabs him by his shoulders, trying to make contact with him. "Mr Katimski?"

For a moment, Mr Katimski opens his eyes and looks Rickie in the eyes. "Ah, Enrique, did you fill in the sign-up-sheet for the drama-club already?" After this strange question, his eyes roll around in his sockets and his body hangs limp in his seat.

"Oh, the pain…!" Shifting on his seat with pure agony; Mr Katimski reaches for his head again, his eyes pressed together firmly.

"Someone call an ambulance!" Rickie's voice is drenched with despair as he keeps eyeing the man who is like a father and friend to him.

As Brian runs out to the nearest phone quickly, his voice rings through the classroom clearly. "I'll call 911!"

Running over to Rickie, Rayanne eyes him worriedly. "Shhh, Rickie, he'll be okay, don't worry." Trying to calm him down, she rubs his arms. For a moment her eyes shift to Mr Katimski; hoping her words will prove to be true, fearing they won't.

[At the restaurant]

Hallie, Graham and some of their friends and family are busy cleaning the place. The furniture is being put into place and the utensils are being packed into cabinets. The tablecloths, little flower-arrangements and menus are being spread over the tables. Meanwhile the final deliveries are being made; such as liquors, wine, meat, vegetables, herbs, and so on. While Hallie is filling up the fountain with Champaign, Graham puts away the ingredients in the kitchen.

There are still many things to sort out, and many things not even thought through. The adrenalin is pumping through Graham's vanes as he continues to sort out ingredients in the kitchen.

Smiling, Hallie walks into the kitchen. "Tomorrow, partner, we'll get this place up and running! I'm so excited; I don't think I will be able to sleep tonight!"

"Yeah, I know what you mean. I can't wait for tomorrow; though I have to admit I'm worried as well…" Graham's mind seems to wander off for a moment; things they still have to take care off pop into his head all the time. The list is becoming endless, or so it seems. All these little things take up so much time and thought, it's unbelievable!

"Don't worry, Graham, you'll be fine! We'll be fine! I got the fountain up and running, by the way. Wanna have a go at it?" Hallie gives Graham a mischievous smirk.

"Neah, let's wait for tomorrow; before clenching our thirst causes the fountain to run dry…" Graham can picture himself with his mouth open, catching the streams of Champaign.

"Just one more night, partner…" Hallie smiles kind of mysteriously and leaves Graham alone in his domain again.

[At the clinic]

On a couple of chairs, Sharon and Angela are sitting down. Most of the seats aren't taken, but there a few more girls spread around the room; all looking glum and scared. There are a few posters up about unwanted pregnancies, and there are brochures lying all over the place; about adoption, abortion, and teen-mom-help-instances.

_Angela__ VO: "Looking around this depressing room, makes me like, wonder if these other girls are all here because of the same reason Sharon is. But since I'm in an abortion-clinic, they probably *are* here for that reason. Would they all be in high school, like me and Sharon? What would have made them take this decision? Did all of them have sex with their ex as well, or was it just one stupid moment in an otherwise loving relationship that messed up their life? Or even worse, were they *raped*; having to deal not only with the mental consequences, but the physical ones as well? _

_I feel like an intruder for being here; staring at these girls__, staring at my friend even; while nothing is wrong with me. I shouldn't be here, mocking them with my problem-free life. I actually feel embarrassed for not being pregnant, ironically enough." _

Waiting to be filled out, Sharon has picked up a form from the counter and spread it out on her lap. Angela looks over Sharon's shoulder at the questions. She never knew they would like totally want to know everything about you; and they even make you sign a sort of we're-not-responsible-statement.

"Ugh, just look at all these questions! It's almost like they want to *keep* you from having an abortion…" Sharon's eyes flicker over the form; her pen still unused in her hand.

"Maybe that's the idea, I don't know. Maybe they want to make sure you like, gave this a whole lot of thought, and are aware of the options; before you do something stupid you are gonna regret for the rest of life."

Angela is shocked by some of the blunt questions that are on the form. Maybe they really do it deliberately to make you reconsider; because this is a life-changing decision after all.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Be right back." Dropping the form and pen on the nearest chair, Sharon walks over to the bathroom.

Picking her backpack up from the floor, Angela drops it on top of Sharon's forms and takes out some papers and books, until she finally finds her diary. Opening it, a note whirls out. Not recognizing it as something she put in there, she picks it up. Unfolding the note, she is surprised to see her mother's handwriting. How did the note end up in her diary; did her mother go through her stuff? She couldn't have been looking for something; she probably just meant to leave her a note, right? Angela folds the note open and reads its contents.

"_Dear Angela,_

_I don't know how else to get through to you, so I'm writing you this note. I am sorry about our argument and I want to make you my sincere apologies. I shouldn't have mistrusted you, because you have never really let me down before. Please understand that I acted out of concern, because I love you. I sincerely hope you can forgive me for what I did and speak to me again. I miss you, you know?_

_All my loving, your mom" _

The note still clutched in her fingers; Angela gazes ahead, thinking about what her mother wrote to her. Her cheeks flush with guilt when she reads that her mother is sorry for mistrusting her...

_Angela VO: "My__ mother has like, every right to mistrust me, because I have been lying. I didn't spend the night over at my friend's house; I spent it with Jordan Catalano. But the fact my mother like, directly assumed I had been lying to her, hurt me beyond believe. Especially after finding out my mother was even worse than I was, at that age. I suppose I could cut her some slack again, seeing how sorry she really is. It kinda makes me feel like a hypocrite anyway, staying mad at her for something she believes I did, claiming I didn't do it, when in fact I really did do it. It doesn't like, make any sense anymore…"_

Her face lit up with a smile, Sharon returns from the bathroom. "Come on Angela, we're getting out of here!"

"What? Why? You're not doing this?" Surprised, Angela picks up her backpack and stuffs the papers and books gathered on the chair inside of her bag; unaware of stuffing Sharon's forms inside of her backpack as well.

Sharon whispers to Angela, "It seems I got my period after all! That explains the tummy ache I was having…"

A smile spreads widely across Angela's face, "You're serious? You did? Like, just now?"

"Yeah, like, just a minute ago! Oh, Chase face, I'm *so* unbelievably happy!" Totally inconsiderate to the other girls who can't escape their problems, Sharon skips through the room.

"I'm so happy for you, Sharon! Let's get out of here quickly!" Angela can't describe how thrilled she is that Sharon got her period after all. Getting out of that depressing room is a big relieve to her as well.

Completely aware of how lucky they really are, both girls run out on the street, giggling and laughing.

[Inside Mr Katimski's classroom]

While some nurses wheel a stretcher into the classroom, a small amount of people is still gathered around Mr Katimski. Rayanne jumps up to fill the men in. "Here he is, he just got like, this weird headache, and things got dark around him. Oh and he's always *very* absent-minded, and forgetful and stuff."

"Thank you miss," The nurses guide the stretcher as close to Mr Katimski as possible. One of them addresses the bystanders, "People, if you have no reason to be here, could you please get out of our way and let us do our job?"

Asking him how he is feeling, one of the nurses turns to Mr Katimski. He can barely answer, his face displaying his agony. "The pain… My head…" His hands reach for his head and eyes, covering them up.

Carefully but steadily, the nurses place him on the stretcher; one of them addresses Mr Katimski, "We're taking you to the hospital now, sir. Is there anyone you'd like to call?"

Rickie answers for him, "We already called his partner, and he's coming to the hospital as soon as possible." Rickie eyes his saviour worriedly, and then turns his eyes to the nurse; tears welling up inside of them. "Will he be okay?"

"I can't tell you that, son. We're doing the best we can, obviously." The nurse wheels the stretcher out of the classroom, through the hallways.

Dumbstruck, Rickie, Rayanne and Brian follow the stretcher until it reaches the ambulance. Closely, they watch Mr Katimski disappear into the ambulance. Adding seriousness to the already insecure situation, the ambulance takes off accompanied by bright lights and sirens. Not able to move a muscle, they all feel like being glued to the spot.

[Outside of school]

Still giggling out of pure nerves, Sharon and Angela come walking across the school-yard. With great curiosity, they eye the speeding ambulance until they spot a very glum-looking Rickie, Rayanne and Brian a little further away.

"Oh no," Fearing it might be Jordan lying in there, Angela makes a run for her friends. Fear sneaks upon her; choking her, clouding up her brain.

"What happened?" Reaching the hearing of her friends, Angela's desperate voice rings through the school-grounds.

His face wet from crying, Rickie looks up, "Angela! It's- it's- Mr Ka-Ka-Katimski, he like--"

Before she can stop it, a sigh of relieve escapes Angela's lips, thankful it's not *Jordan* being taken away in that ambulance. Running across the lawn, Angela drops her backpack before she reaches her friends. Rickie's eyes make her heart ache so much; she knows how much Rickie cares for Mr Katimski, he's like the only one that takes care for Rickie.

"Oh Rickie, I'm so sorry for you!" Angela wraps her arms around him and he starts sobbing again. "Let's hope for the best, okay?" She's not sure what to tell Rickie; not everything in this life is fair, and he knows that all too well.

"So, Mr Katimski got taken away?" Frowning her face, Sharon approaches the group.

Still under the impression of what happened, Rayanne and Brian mumble something affirmative. Both of them sit down on the grass for a moment.

Sharon plops down next to them. "What happened to him?"

Over-dramatically Rayanne answers, "He like, seemed to *forget* what class he was teaching us, and then he like, asked us if it was getting dark. And then he like, reached for his head, *screaming* from the pain he was suffering! Oh man, it was like, *so* intense to watch!" She shakes her head with disbelief.

"So, where were you?" Brian seems to awake from his previous state of mind.

Sharon answers snippy, "None of your business."

Getting up, Brian answers her, "Fine!" He walks over to Angela's backpack to get her stuff from the grass; papers and books are being scattered all over the place. He grabs everything and drags it back to the place where Rayanne and Sharon are still sitting.

Rayanne sends Brian a filthy stare when he plops down next to her, warning him not to get frisky. Getting hold of the books and papers, he stuffs them in Angela's backpack when a particular sheet catches his eye. A shockwave bolts through his body when he reads the logo; it's some kind of abortion-questionnaire.

Catching Brian's lengthy stare and facial expression, Rayanne grabs the piece of paper from his hands. "What's this Krakow, a porn story?"

Her eyes travel over the piece of paper and grow big with disbelief; her mouth can't seem to shut itself anymore. This is like an abortion-form, and it seriously came from Angela's bag?

"Give it back to me." Angrily, Brian looks at Rayanne.

"Bite me!" Rayanne pulls the piece of paper away from Brian's greedy hands.

Wondering what they are bickering about this time, Sharon sends the two of them an angry stare. Wondering why they can't like, *shut up* for once, when their friend is in pain.

Making sure Sharon won't see it; Rayanne holds the piece of paper behind her back. "What? Am I like, wearing something of you?"

"No!" Sharon's face is turning disgusted. Rayanne dresses like, weird, all the time.

"So, chip, chip, look at Angela and Rickie then!" Rayanne waves her hand.

Sharon is about to blab out another remark when Rickie and Angela walk towards them.

"We should like, go back to class, I guess." Eyeing her friends, Angela sighs.

"Yeah, I guess we like, should." Sharon gets up and walks up to the school besides Angela and Rickie.

Rayanne and Brian follow them, Brian still holding on to Angela's backpack. He whispers to Rayanne, "So, you think like, maybe Angela is considering an abortion?"

Lately being around Rayanne confuses him; but finding this piece of information about Angela makes him realise that whatever it is he is feeling towards Rayanne, doesn't even come *close* to what he feels for Angela.

Shrugging her shoulders, Rayanne whispers to Brian, "It like, came from *her* bag, right? I know she like, did with it Jordan, so who knows. I mean, shit happens."

Brian feels like he's being punched in the stomach; he had hopes that maybe Angela and Jordan hadn't actually *done* anything, but apparently they did. And now she may be pregnant with him as well. Should he, like, confront her?

"Oh no, you don't!" Still in a whispering voice, Rayanne tells Brian off. She knows what he's thinking; he's the kind of guy who wants to make sure everything goes by the book. He's like, struggling whether or not to confront Angela.

"Don't what?" Confused, Brian looks at her. Can she like, read his mind or something? She's freaking him out at times, wondering what else she knows about him without him being aware of it.

"Don't ask her, and don't tell anyone, *especially* not Jordan! Just, don't. If she had wanted to tell anyone, she like, would have. I mean, she like, forgot to tell me too, so obviously she doesn't wanna talk about it, you know?" Rayanne's heart aches because Angela obviously doesn't feel she can entrust Rayanne with a secret like this, yet.

"Maybe it's not *hers*… Maybe she's holding on to it for someone else?" Brian's brain is whirling with thoughts. "Think about it, Sharon was away too, this morning. So, it could be like, Sharon's…" That thought actually relieves Brian's mind a bit.

"You're right, Krakow. Huh, being brainy isn't so bad at all, I guess…" Rayanne eyes the two girls in front of her, wondering which one is carrying a baby inside of her belly.

"Anyway, let's keep this a secret, okay? Just like the other thing, you know…" Rayanne's cheeks seem to flush a little as she tries to remain all cool and untouched.

"Whatever, it's not like I *owe* you anything," Sneakily, Brian eyes her. Why does she have to bring that up again? She's doing it on purpose; she's like, the devil or something, making his heart pound maniacally at the thought of what happened that night.

"Just shut up, Krakow, maybe it'll be like, worth it, who knows…" Rayanne gives him a mysterious glance; immediately showing off its effect on Brian's vibrant red-colouring face.

[Saturday, Chase's House]

_Angela VO: "So, Rickie is like, staying with us again while Mr Katimski is being hospitalized. __He may suffer from a brain-tumour or an aneurysm, they're not sure yet. When I told my mom what happened she *insisted* Rickie stay with us. It's like, when she feels needed, she's like, happy or something. I also told her I found her note and that we're like, okay again. It's easier anyway, with everything that's been going on lately. Like, for instance, in a few short hours my dad's restaurant will be opening up for guests and we're all sort of expected to help out. My parents have been running around the house extremely stressed all day and I feel kinda useless…" _

"Angela, we have to go *now*! Are you ready? Your dad is counting on us!" Searching for things, Patty walks around the house; going back and forth to their car to load more groceries and other things into it.

"Yeah, I'm ready. Can Rickie and I wait in the car, or do you need us to carry more stuff?" Angela eyes her mother with pity; she seems even more stressed out than her dad was.

_Angela VO: "My__ mother asked me to dress up 'nicely', so I'm wearing the red velvet dress. I discovered some black hold-up stockings in my mother's drawer and I'm wearing them right now. Panty hoses are like, so unattractive."_

"No, no, we've got everything, I hope. Take Danielle along and wait while I get the last few things." Patty disappears into the kitchen again.

"I wanna go in the front-seat!" Danielle runs to the passengers-side of the car and opens up the passengers-door.

"No, *I* wanna sit in the front! You're too little anyway!" Angela shoves her little sister aside.

"You *always* get to ride in the front-seat! It's not fair! Can't Jordan like, pick you up?" Danielle gives her sister an angry stare.

All of a sudden her attitude changes; Brian Krakow comes cycling up their driveway. Danielle hangs against the car-door seemingly relaxed, greeting him. "Hey Brian."

"Hey Danielle, maybe you should let your sister like, sit in the front; it might be safer and all…" Lingering at her belly and speculating, Brian's eyes travel over Angela's body.

"Hey Brian, like, safer for whom?" Angela doesn't get a word Brian is saying.

"You know, like safer, because of umm--"

Closely, Brian studies Angela's facial expression, hoping something will give her feelings away. But she doesn't blink, or flush, which could mean that it is Sharon who is pregnant, and not her. "No, I didn't mean anything by it, just, umm, because Danielle might not be tall enough, you know."

"Why does everybody keep *saying* that! I'm tall; I'm not a little girl anymore! And I have feelings too, you know!" Starting off angrily, Danielle bursts into tears; getting inside of the car hastily.

Wondering where that came from, Angela, Rickie and Brian are eyeing each other dumbstruck.

"So, Rickie, how's Mr Katimski doing?" Pushing his bicycle back and forth, Brian breaks the silence.

"No improvement or anything. They're still examining him; for now he gets medication to ease the pain. He's waiting for a CAT-scan, they think he's got like a tumour or maybe an aneurysm in his head." Rickie's eyes display his concerns instantly; aside from his potential homelessness, Mr Katimski's health is bringing him down immensely. He would give like, anything, to be able to save his life; even his *own* life…

"I'm sorry about that. I hope--" Brian is being interrupted by Patty who comes walking up the driveway.

"Oh hey, Brian, will you be coming along with your parents this evening?" Patty pauses for a brief moment before she continues, "Get in the car you two, we have to go!" Her head beckons Rickie and Angela to get inside the car. They listen to her obediently.

"Umm, I like, didn't know I was invited."

"Ofcourse you are! Most of Angela's friends are coming, it will be fun! Sharon and her parents are coming, Rayanne and her mom will be there; even Jordan Catalano will show up if I'm not mistaking…" Holding on the car-door, Patty eyes Brian for a reaction.

"I'll think about it, but thanks anyway, Mrs C."

Mulling the proposal over in his head Brian hops on his bike and cycles back home. Rayanne, Sharon and Jordan will be there, and he's not sure whether he wants to be confronted with all of them. It might be an excellent opportunity to find out more about the pregnancy though…

[Saturday, at the restaurant]

It's a little before opening time; the champagne-fountain is up and running and the last things are being taken care off. As he showed once before already during his stay at the Chase's, Rickie proves to be a good help. He has the right insights about organizing things and cleaning up. Getting his mind of his worries for a moment, he even seems to be enjoying himself.

One by one the guests are coming in, most of them come bearing gifts. Hallie and Graham are glowing with pride and accept all compliments eagerly. Pretty soon one of the tables is filled with flower bouquets and all sorts of presents. Rickie is helping out by serving out trays with drinks and snacks and pointing out the champagne-fountain to the guests.

Eyeing the guests with lukewarm interest, Angela and Danielle are sitting down at one of the tables. So far no one familiar has come through that door. A smile spreads across Angela's face when Jordan Catalano walks through the door. She gets up quickly and runs towards the door, greeting him with a "Hey…"

"Hey." His eyes beaming with happiness, Jordan smiles warmly at Angela.

"I'm so glad you're here, I was like, bored out of my mind!" Kissing him passionately, Angela gets hold of both his hands.

"Come with me, I wanna show you something." Grinning mischievous, her eyes sparkle with boldness. Angela takes Jordan to the back; to a little storage room. Opening the door, Angela gestures Jordan to come inside with her.

"What's this?" Jordan eyes her non-comprehensive. Wondering if he missed out on anything, his eyes go around the room.

Shutting the door, Angela walks up close to Jordan. "I missed you; you know that?" Her hands crawl into his neck-hair, ruffling through it, drawing him closer to her.

"Yeah?" Jordan's hands wrap themselves around her waist and his eyes stay fixated on hers. As his mouth draws near hers, his eyes radiate happiness and desire. His lips press against hers and he mumbles, "Me too," before devouring her with his deep kiss.

[In the restaurant]

Greeting Graham, Hallie, Patty and Neill enthusiastically, Brian and his parents walk through the door. "Oh my, this place looks gorgeous!" They engage in a lively conversation.

Brian congratulates them and walks over to the fountain where he spotted Danielle before, who is secretly filling up a glass of champagne. When Brian approaches, Danielle startles, looking around, trying to hide her glass from his sight.

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone. You see, I never tell. I'm just Brian, the reliable guy who can never talk about anything he has seen, heard, read or even experienced. People just like, expect me to shut up, because I'm like that statue with the three monkeys, you know? Hear, see, shut up; or something like that." Sitting down gloomily on the edge of the fountain, Brian eyes Danielle.

"You're weird, you know that? I don't have a clue what you're talking about!" Sipping her champagne carefully, Danielle sits down next to Brian. At the first taste her lips shrivel up. "Alcohol is like, gross! Why do grown-ups drink it anyway?"

"Apparently it eases their pain or makes their sorrow go away or something. It makes you lose control over your body, mind and speech and makes you act *stupid*. Like, the next day you will wonder if what happened was really *real* or not, and if it would have happened anyway if she hadn't been drinking and you hadn't been drinking, or something like that." Brian stares ahead for a moment, blinks and seems to come back down to earth.

With open mouth, Danielle gazes at him. "Again, I'm like, clueless! Who's the she-person you're talking about anyway, Angela maybe?" She eyes him with jealousy.

"What? What she-person are you talking about? I wasn't talking about any girl, because *obviously* there aren't any women in my life, besides my mother of course." Brian looks confused. Did he really mention a she-person to Danielle; was he really thinking that out loud?

"What about me then? I'll be the woman in your life…"

"What? No, you can't be, you're far too--"

"Young, I know," Interrupting him, Danielle knows exactly what he is going to say, because everyone keeps saying it.

"Danielle," Brian looks at her; she's so innocent. How can he let her down easy, knowing there *is* no such thing as being let down easy?

"Just, give me the champagne, before you get yourself in any trouble." He can't say those words to her; he would feel responsible making her lose faith in all the boys and men out there. She'll find out in time, but not by his doing.

Danielle hands him the champagne and Brian pours it down his throat in one draught. "So, is your sister around? I need to talk to her…"

Danielle's eyes rolls in their sockets; he *has* to bring Angela up again. "I think I saw her go into the back with Jordan Catalano."

"Thanks," Getting up, Brian searches the entrance to the back.

[In the storage room]

Things are beginning to get out of control when Jordan and Angela are making out. The kisses intensify, their hands are eagerly exploring. Angela's hands wander under Jordan's shirt, caressing him, feeling his heart-rate speeding up. Jordan's hands wander over Angela's upper-body, kneading her breasts, until her hardened nipples provoke him to touch them. His tongue glides down over her chest in slow, teasing circles; his hands lower the neckline of her dress in order to obtain access for his teasingly hot, wet tongue.

Jordan's hot trailing tongue makes Angela quiver with desire; her mouth opens up to let out a few soft moans. His hands slide down further, caressing her legs; hiking up her skirt in the process. By grabbing her buttocks, he pulls Angela tightly against his body; making her feel his arousal for her. His fingers find their way under her skirt, pushing her panties aside; feeling the undeniable proof she wants him as badly as he wants her.

Determined, Angela's hands grab hold of his belt; she unbuckles it and slips the buttons of his fly out of their holes. Her fingers explore the territory under the denim restraint, finding their way into his tight boxers, feeling his arousal for her.

Hoarse with passion Angela asks him, "Did you bring, like, umm--?"

Jordan's eyes are drenched with desire as he answers her, "Yeah."

[Outside the storage room]

Searching the restaurant for Angela's whereabouts, Brian Krakow hears noises coming from the other side of a shut door. Angela must be in there, like, searching for something. Hesitating to open it, his hand lingers on the doorknob. Maybe his imagination is getting the best of him, but the noises sound like smothered moans and creaking sounds. His curiosity takes over after all, and he opens the door.

Lost for words, he stares at the scene unfolding right before his eyes. Jordan Catalano has Angela pinned against a storage-cabinet; his pants riding somewhere halfway down his legs, her legs wrapped around his waist. They are kissing intensely and are so deeply entangled it's hard to tell where one person ends and the other person starts. His throat runs dry when he realises they are actually having *sex*.

Startled because of the sudden awareness of their spectator, Angela lets outs a high-pitched scream, "Brian!" Her legs unwrap themselves from Jordan's body and she readjusts her clothing, while Jordan looks around shifty, pulling his pants up hastily.

"What are you doing here, Brian?" Angela's voice is raging and her eyes spark with fury as she closes in on Brian threateningly.

Trying to push away the visions that keep projecting themselves onto his brain, Brian closes his eyes. Waiting for the hole in the ground to open up and swallow him, nothing happens. "I was–I-I just..."

Actually, he can't think of any good excuse to be here. Then he remembers what he wanted to ask Angela, and regains control over his speech again. "How can you like, still be doing that; while you're in, you know –your- condition?!"

"What condition are you talking about?" Angela is clueless what Brian is referring to.

"Oh, don't play dumb with me! I found the papers in your bag, you know, the abortion papers!" Brian raises his voice; mad at her for treating him like an ignorant idiot.

Turning white with shock; Jordan backs away to the wall, eyeing Angela incredulous.

"What?! When did you go through my bag, Brian? You have no *right* to go through my stuff!"

"I- I- Look, just calm down! I picked your bag up yesterday when we were outside, watching Mr Katimski being taken away, remember? The papers had fallen out, I just happened to see them, I didn't mean to-" Brian wonders how Angela does what she does to him; now he's actually feeling guilty for helping her and accidentally stumbling upon some papers.

Jordan can't seem to come up with any words to say to Angela, instead he's still eyeing her in shock. He suspected something was up with her, lately, and now Brian found those forms…

"Look, the papers weren't mine, okay?"

"How do I know you're not lying to me?"

"I'm not lying, I'm not pregnant."

Blankly, Angela looks at Brian, averting her eyes to look at Jordan before she continues, "And I already told *you* that it was one of my friends and not me, and you said you trusted me, so why are you acting all shocked now?"

"I umm, I was like, afraid maybe you couldn't like, tell me. You were acting like, different, lately, I don't know." Jordan licks his lips.

"I would never lie to you, Jordan, I swear. And the only reason I may have been acting differently, was because I felt like, sorry for my friend, you know?"

"So, are the abortion-papers Sharon's then?" Brian won't go away before Angela tells him the truth.

"Are they? Please, tell me they're not…" Out of nowhere Andy Cherski has appeared, eyeing Brian, Angela and Jordan with a worried face.

Behind him, Graham is unsure how to act. "I thought I'd show Andy umm, the entire restaurant. Sharon wanted to know where you were, Angela, so I thought…"

"This is just *freaking* great! Thanks Brian, for like, sticking your nose in everyone's business, as usual! How come you're always around to screw up my life? Now my dad knows I had sex, and he will surely tell my mom, no doubt about it. And Sharon's dad probably didn't know his daughter was having sex either; let alone that she was considering having…" Practically blowing steam, Angela takes off.

Running past everyone, anger and grief are taking over Angela's being. Bumping into Sharon who's on her way over to the back, she tries to warn her. "Don't go into the back! I'm really, really sorry, Sharon."

"Angela!" Running out of the storage-room, Jordan follows Angela outside.

Mumbling an excuse, Brian takes off as well, leaving behind both fathers and Sharon. Could his life get anymore fucked up? He always keeps the secrets he's being told; and when he finally tells one, things escalate beyond believe. He has hurt so many people now that he can't go back to school, not ever.

[Outside the restaurant]

Outside Brian bumps into Rayanne Graff and her mother. "Great; like this night wasn't dramatic enough already".

Standing around awkwardly for a moment, Amber gazes from Brian to Rayanne. She rests her hand on Rayanne's arm and tells her, "I'll be inside, angel." Giving Brian a weird-looking smile, she is about to walk through the door, when Rayanne calls after her.

"Amber? Don't like, wait up for me; I may be going to this cafe afterwards, you know, to meet this guy. I'll catch a ride home with him or something; don't worry, okay?" Self assured, Rayanne looks at Amber.

"Don't do anything stupid, okay?" Amber already expected her daughter to indulge in other activities on a Saturday night, so she's not surprised at all. She walks inside, greeting the Chase's and Hallie.

****

"So, what's like, happening here Krakow? First an upset Angela and Jordan like, practically *fly* past me, and now you! Why do I always miss out on all the fun?" Rayanne eyes Brian curiously.

"Please, don't ask. You wouldn't believe what a night I had. If you'll excuse me now, I'm going home to lock myself in my room, so I can die in peace." Walking past Rayanne, she stops Brian.

"Would this, like, help?" Pushing Brian into the wall, Rayanne leans in to kiss him passionately; taking even herself by surprise completely. She can't explain why she's doing this; she barely had any alcohol, so that's not it.

After the first shock subsides, Brian follows her lips and tongue in the game of exploration; enjoying the feelings of his first kiss as they wash over him; consuming his insides with a burning fire.

*****

Inside the restaurant, a little girl's nose is being pressed against the window; involuntarily taking in the sight of Rayanne and Brian making out. Tears well up in Danielle's eyes and she runs through the restaurant, towards the back-door. Blinded by tears she starts running away from the restaurant into the chilly evening air; away from the people who don't care about her, who ignore her, who think she's too young, and who won't even miss her.

**To Be Continued…**


	10. Episode 29: Fear

**A/N: Unbeta'd again, I'll replace it a.s.a.p!**

_This fic picks up right after episode 28; Danielle has fled away from the restaurant after witnessing something upsetting to her._

_Danielle VO: "After seeing Rayanne kiss Brian, I couldn't __take it anymore. Nobody cares for me; they keep saying I'm like, too young, or they just ignore me. It's always about Angela; she gets to do *everything*, even when she's a big pain in the you-know-what anyway. When is *my* life finally going to start; when will they stop treating me like a kid and allow me to do all the stuff Angela's doing? _

"_And why does Rayanne Graff have to be so mean? I know what she did to my sister even if nobody told me, because I read it in Angela's diary one day. Rayanne had sex with Jordan Catalano! I like, totally understand why Angela was mad at her. And now Rayanne comes along and steals away the one boy I like. I hate her, I hate her, I hate her!"_

[Outside the restaurant, Saturday evening]

After a while Danielle's sadness starts to subside and her legs are becoming tired of running. Suddenly realising she doesn't know where she is, she looks around. Her eyes take in the environment, trying to find some point she might recognize. It must be getting very late already, because it's almost totally dark outside.

Out of nowhere a man walks up to her, eyeing her closely. "Hey there, little girl, are you lost?"

_Danielle__ VO: "My mother taught me *never ever* to talk to strangers, and most certainly not to go anywhere with them; no matter what they promise you."_

"I'm not lost! My dad is right over there, waiting for me!" Pointing ahead, she's trying to bluff her way out. Even if she is lost and all alone, in need of someone to rescue her, she has a feeling not to trust this man.

As fast as her little legs can carry her, she makes a run for it; her heart pounding in her chest with fear. After a while she turns her head to see if the man has followed her. In the distance she can still see his silhouette, unmoved. Relieved she sighs and slows down her pace to a normal one.

The chilly air wraps itself around her like a cold blanket, making her shiver. In an attempt to get warm she rubs her arms; regretting the running-away already. Her eyes scan the place to find a sheltered spot to rest for a while; the cold concrete floor near a dumpster is where she allows herself to catch her breath.

Missing her dad, her mom, and even her sister, she starts sobbing again. She feels immensely cold and scared; all the shadows look like monsters and ghosts and every little sound startles her. Her eyes keep glancing back to where she last saw the man, making sure he's not coming to get her or anything. She curls up against the freezing cold dumpster. Wondering what to do, she stares around.

In the distance her eyes can make out a spooky looking, almost empty parking space. A big, red American car is sticking out against the grey, concrete backdrop of the otherwise abandoned parking space. Its intense red colour and identifiable shape are ill-lit by the dull, flickering light of a street lamp; Danielle recognizes her salvation in a heart-beat. Relieved she gets up and runs towards the car; ignoring the frightening sounds and sights around her by closing her eyes (only blinking once in a while) and pressing her hands against her ears.

Getting closer to the car, she recognizes Angela and Jordan standing next to it; talking to each other.

_Danielle VO: "I__'ve never been this relieved to see my sister! It's like, really scary to be out here alone. I wonder if mom and dad have even noticed I've gone missing; they're probably too busy entertaining their guests to know I'm gone."_

Careful not to be discovered by Angela or Jordan, Danielle sneaks up to the car; since they only have eyes for each other, that's quite easy to do. She opens the backdoor to Jordan's car softly and hides on the floor, between the backseat and the front-seat; quiet as a mouse. She wraps her arms around her legs and remains as tiny as possible; and despite her uncomfortable pose she has never felt happier to be somewhere safe, familiar, warm and dry.

[Inside the restaurant, Saturday evening]

Despite Angela's warning to stay out of there, Sharon has reached the back of the restaurant. Angela made no sense at all, apologizing to Sharon when she stormed out. Shortly after Angela burst through the restaurant Jordan and Brian flew after her. Sharon's curiosity got the best of her and she walks into the back anyway; finding her dad and Graham talking to each other secretly.

When Sharon appears, Graham walks back into the restaurant again, leaving Andy and his daughter alone to talk.

"What's up, daddy?" Sharon's voice sounds innocent; her eyes display her ignorance.

"You tell me, Sharon. It seems Brian discovered something rather upsetting about you," Andy remains calm despite the mixed emotions raging through his body.

"Brian knows something about me? He can't like, know, because I never told him anything. He must be like, guessing." Sharon's cheeks demonstrate a bright and vibrant red.

"It seems Brian found some forms in Angela's bag…" Andy cocks his eyebrow.

Sharon's mind is all over the place; should she lie to her dad and tell him the forms are Angela's instead of hers? But what if Angela already told him the truth, and that's why-- [The truth hits her] That's why Angela told her she was sorry…

Sharon looks up to her dad, her eyes begging for forgiveness. "Daddy, I didn't know what to do… I mean, I was afraid to like, tell you or mom. Afraid you'd judge me…"

"Sharon, this is very serious, do you realise that? I know it must be hard on you to entrust us with sex-related problems, but we're your *parents*. We love you, no matter what. We're here for you, no matter what the problem is."

"Dad, I know what I did was like, very wrong. I didn't want to let you guys down, you know? Me and Kyle, well, we sorta kept seeing each other after we broke up, you know…" Sharon's cheeks flush. "And then one night, we forgot to--, you know…"

"And next thing I know, my period didn't come; so I was like, totally freaking out, thinking that having it removed was like, my only option." Looking up at her dad again, Sharon hopes he understands what she's trying to say. It's so embarrassing to talk to your father about sex.

"I still wish you would have come to us with this. We could have talked things over and explored all your options, before you made a life-altering decision that you may very well regret for the rest of your life…"

"I know, I know, but I didn't do it, I mean, I'm not still pregnant or anything, I just got my period after all."

"Oh, honey, I'm relieved you didn't have to go through with it, believe me." Andy's words are drenched with relief. "But I still wish you would have confided in us."

Sharon gives her dad a hug, and mumbles softly, "How come you're not mad at me?"

"I already suspected you were having sex; it just *showed* in the way you and Kyle behaved."

Andy backs out of their embrace and looks Sharon in the eye before he continues, "After surviving my heart attach, I realised life is too short to have regrets. You should enjoy it, because you never know when it's gonna be over. Getting all worked up about your problems is such a waste of time, you know? I don't want to judge you; I want to support you, because you and your mom are the most important things in my life."

"Thank you so much, daddy. I love you, you know that?" Tears of joy fill up Sharon eyes. In a way it feels great to have her secret out in the open; even if she's sure that her mother will have a few things to say about it as well. She's grateful to her dad anyway.

[Outside, next to Jordan's car, Saturday evening]

"You want me to like, take you home?" Underneath her jacket, sheltered from the cold, Jordan's hands are wrapped around Angela's waist.

"No, I can't go back home, not tonight. I can't face my mother, not yet anyway. You have no idea how mad she will be at me!"

Angela gives Jordan a sceptical stare; doesn't he understand she may as well *never* go back home again? She will probably be grounded for like, the rest of her life anyway.

"Let my mom blow off some steam first; I'll face her tomorrow, I guess…" A lock of red hair is flicked behind Angela's ear.

"So, where do you like, wanna go then?"

"Your place, maybe?" A warm feeling sours through Angela's body at the thought of another night alone with Jordan Catalano.

"I'm umm… My dad, he…" Jordan's eyes look away shifty; he lets go of Angela and leans against his car. He searches his pockets for a cigarette and a lighter.

"We can like, sneak in, can't we?" Angela tries to persuade Jordan; it's truly the only option she sees right now, honestly.

Jordan lights up a cigarette and draws a smoke from it, inhaling deeply. Streamers of smoke come blowing out his nose again. "I can't promise you, like, anything…" He looks around nervously, avoiding eye-contact with Angela at all cost.

"Are you still afraid of him, Jordan?" Angela wishes she never put him in this position. "I wouldn't ask you to do this, if I, like, knew where else to go, you know?"

"Yeah, I know…" Jordan's lips are smiling faintly; his eyes meet hers, displaying his inner struggle. Deeply, he inhales from his cigarette once more, exhaling small circles of smoke.

"Get in; I'll try to…" Not finishing his sentence, Jordan holds the door open to Angela; she hops in and slides down on the cold leather seat.

Inhaling from his cigarette once more, Jordan walks over to his side of the car. He flicks the stub away and lowers himself onto the comfy, but chilly seat. Without looking at Angela he starts the car and drives off; his hands displaying the slightest tremble.

[Outside of the restaurant, Saturday evening]

In a nearby alley Brian and Rayanne continue their make-out session. The cold doesn't seem to harm either of them and the scarcely lit alley only contributes to the secrecy of their rendezvous.

Rayanne's closeness makes Brian's senses work overtime. Her scent is enchanting, like she's luring him into a dangerous world filled with wild promises. Her eyes are like deep, dark pools of pure lust; beckoning him to take a plunge into its treacherous depths. Her lips both promise a velvety lushness, as well as a sensual sleekness.

In between kisses Brian mumbles at Rayanne's lips, "Not that I'm complaining or anything, but *why* are you doing this?"

Unlocking her lips from Brian's, Rayanne fixes her eyes onto his. "Dunno, don't care." Grabbing hold of Brian's collar, she leans in to kiss him again.

"I mean, is this like a one-time-thing? Will you be like, ignoring me again, when this is over?" He has no desire to become her charity-case or some substitute for god-knows-who.

"Krakow; could you like, *stop* analyzing everything in your life, and go with the flow for like, *once*?" Rayanne eyes him disbelieving. Why does everything have to be like an equation to him? Is it like, not *real*, unless it can be expressed in numbers?

"I'm not the go-with-the-flow-type, and you know it. I want to know--"

"Ugh! You know, unlike you, I *am* that type, and I like, don't know what this is about, but I don't care either! Can't you just like, *enjoy* the moment or something?" Rayanne eyes him irritated. What is the matter with him? Isn't she like, attractive enough to him?

Brian thinks about Rayanne's words, and recollects the conversation he had with Angela's dad. He *should* take this moment as it comes, and not think about tomorrow. Who cares if Rayanne will ignore him or not?

"So, you're not supposed to meet some other guy in a café?"

"You're a fool, you know that, Krakow?" Shaking her head with disbelief, Rayanne pulls Brian near her face by his collar. "I'm here, aren't I? I'm like, ready, I'm willing, and you like, keep thinking about like, what will happen next…"

"You're right, I don't care. What will happen next, I mean. Going with the flow now; new and improved Brian, at your service." Grinning at her, Brian's eyes wander down sneakily to eye her fingers, still clutching his collar.

Catching his stare at her fingers, Rayanne hastily releases her grip on his collar. Confused, she looks around. "I don't know like, what to do anymore."

"You know, just go with the flow…No strings attached ofcourse." Quickly, Brian wraps his arms around her waist and pulls her body tightly against his. Rayanne just made him confident enough to take the next step. He feels like the most confident man in the world. Well, in *his* world at least.

Taken by surprise by Brian's decisiveness and boldness, Rayanne's eyes give away her shock; for a brief moment she's actually stumped for words. "Bite me," is her response; nothing wrong with playing a little hard to get once in while.

For a moment Brian seems to be confused by her response. Is she like, serious now? With great curiosity he studies her expression; her eyes tell him something entirely different than her words just did. In a hungry kiss, he presses his lips against Rayanne's, instantly met by her eager lips. Their tongues start to tease, taste and explore the undiscovered wetness of each others hot mouths.

[In the back of Jordan's car, Saturday evening]

The car has come to a halt again; this time Angela and Jordan are getting out. Still holding her breath, Danielle waits for a while. Slowly, she pulls herself up by clinging to the front seat's neck rest, carefully looking around if Jordan and Angela have disappeared from sight.

_Danielle VO: "I guess__ Jordan parked his car at his place now. Angela is staying here tonight; I heard her tell Jordan she's like, afraid to go home right now. It sounded like Jordan was kinda afraid to take her home too. I'd like to know why, because I *think* they had sex already, so that can't be it. Angela must have like, hidden her diary somewhere else, because I can't find it anymore."_

Making sure there's no one around anymore, Danielle hops onto the backseat. On it, she finds a blanket and pulls it towards her, covering up her rapidly cooling and shivering body. Lying down, she curls herself up. Looking up through the window, she's barely able to see a few stars, high up in the pitch-black sky. Startling her at times, she tries to ignore the unfamiliar sounds surrounding her by closing her eyes. Feeling alone and scared, she starts sobbing again, quietly.

_Danielle VO: "__I think staying in Jordan's car tonight is the best thing to do. I don't want to go in there with Angela and Jordan, because I'm sure Angela will take me home if I come walking through that door and I don't *want* to go home because they might be angry at me for running away. If they have even noticed I'm not there…"_

[At the restaurant, Saturday evening]

"Bye now, thanks for dropping by! Drive safely!" After greeting the last couple of guests on their way out, Graham closes the door.

Clearing the tables, Rickie puts the dishes in a bin and throws away the plastic cups. He's singing, seemingly enjoying the tasks he took upon himself. Anything that will help get his mind of Mr Katimski for a while is good.

"Well, our evening was a big hit, if I may say so!" Beaming with pride, Hallie cuddles up to Neill.

"Well, the *restaurant*-part was a hit, I agree; some other parts needed some work, perhaps…" Graham frowns his face.

Slightly disgruntled, Patty looks at her husband. "Oh, you mean the fact that Angela stormed out; embarrassing her parents yet again by thinking only about her own feelings? What was that all about? And why did Jordan and Brian run after her? Did they have a fight of some sort?"

"I wouldn't exactly call it a fight." Smirking mischievously; Graham's eyes seek out his brother's.

"What do you mean? Graham, what happened over there?"

Getting hold of Patty's arm, Graham whisks her away from Neill and Hallie. "We'll be right back, you two." Winking at them, he whispers at Patty, "I'm not sure I should tell you this, Patty. It didn't just involve Angela, you see. Sharon was being rather, umm, exposed, so to say."

"Could you stop talking in riddles Graham, and tell me what happened! I have a right to now!"

"First, promise me that you will remain calm when I tell you."

"I promise," Patty sighs. "Just tell me, I'm a grown woman, I can handle it; I'm sure."

"It seems that Brian had found some rather disturbing forms in Angela's backpack."

"Cut to the chase, Graham…"

"Yes Chase, I'll cut to the chase…" Smirking at her, Graham tries to postpone the inevitable. Reluctantly, he continues, "The forms weren't Angela's, before you start freaking out. They *could* have been, but they weren't…"

"Could you please just tell me what kind of forms they were, Graham?!"

"Abortion forms…" Eyeing his dumbstruck wife, Graham awaits a feisty response.

Staring ahead, Patty's lips form words they don't pronounce. "Abortion forms? But you're absolutely positive they weren't Angela's? And what do you mean, they *could* have been hers? Did she and Jordan--" Her mouth falls open with surprise.

"Yes Patty; our eldest daughter had sex, with Jordan Catalano. She's not a little girl anymore, I guess." Leaning against a cupboard, Graham's fingers rub his neck.

"Well, it was about to happen anyway, I guess… But, the papers, whose were they then?"

"Sharon's."

"Sharon's?" Yet again, Patty's mouth falls open. She never thought Sharon was the kind of girl to… She never even thought Sharon was the kind of girl to have sex before her marriage! A shred of the conversation she had with Camille protrudes her brain; this totally explains Sharon's changed behaviour of the last few weeks.

"Angela walked out angrily, as you witnessed; and Jordan followed her outside. He must have taken her home or something." Knowing she needed some time to cool off, Graham didn't go after Angela. And even if Jordan Catalano *did* lure his daughter into his bed; he knows she's safe around him, he'll protect her from harm.

"Well, I guess so. Or, he's just taken her somewhere else, to have sex in his car, again…" Patty retorts sarcastically. "Now that's a comforting thought…"

"Who knows…? There's nothing we can do about it now, can we? Speaking of young and innocent daughters; have you seen Danielle around?" Suddenly wondering about his youngest daughter's whereabouts; Graham's eyes search the place.

"Actually, I haven't seen much of her all evening. I'm sure she's around here somewhere." As Patty walks through the restaurant trying to find Danielle, her mind is still with Angela, Jordan and Sharon.

"Danielle! Danielle? Where are you, honey?" Patty is searching the restaurant from top to bottom, Graham does the same thing.

Walking into the front again; they ask Hallie, Neill and Rickie if they have seen Danielle at all. They all deny having seen Danielle around. Patty and Graham are starting to get worried; what if someone has taken her away and they didn't even notice? What if she ran away and is lost now? The panic starts to sink in and rings through in their voices, sounding desperate, as they call out Danielle's name in vain.

Everybody helps to search Danielle; every inch of the restaurant is being turned out. Even the surroundings are being searched, until a few blocks around the restaurant. After searching for Danielle for over an hour; they sit down inside, taken aback.

"What can we do? Should we go the police? Should we go over to her friends' houses? What would *she* do, where would she go?" Patty's thoughts tumble from her head to her lips.

"Let's stay calm, try to focus; maybe she went home already?" Rickie speaks his mind out loud.

"How?" Patty looks at Rickie angrily.

"I don't know, like maybe with Angela and Jordan, or maybe Brian or Sharon took her?" Rickie is trying to think what Danielle would do.

"Okay, maybe one of us should go home and check; while someone else stays here, in case she shows up again. And in the meantime, I think we should go to the police as well." Despite her fear, Patty seems to be able to organize her thoughts.

Graham gets up. "Patty, we're gonna go home and check. Rickie, you can come with us. If they're not at home, we'll let *you* stay at home in case the phone rings or anything. Hallie and Neill, I sincerely hope you two want to stay here, in case she returns?"

Vigorously, Hallie and Neill bob their heads up and down. Hallie answers, "Ofcourse, we'll stay put, don't worry. Ring us, if you have any news, okay?"

"Yeah, we will. Thanks," Graham holds the door open to his wife and Rickie and they head back home, hoping for the best.

[Inside Jordan's house, Saturday night]

The TV is on in the living room; a dark-haired skinny-looking man, dressed in a filthy white shirt and old worn-down jeans, is lying on the couch. Empty beer cans surround him and spread a disgustingly intense smell. Holding hands, Jordan and Angela try to sneak past the man on the couch.

Suddenly, the man asks, "Jordan, is that you?"

Freezing to the spot, Jordan answers submissively, "Yeah dad."

"Get me another beer, will ya?" Jordan's father doesn't bother turning around to look at his son.

"Dad, I umm, like, brought someone with me…" Jordan's voice hesitates, afraid of the consequences the words on his lips might have.

To show her support, Angela squeezes Jordan's hand.

As far as possible without moving his body, Jordan's father turns his head around. It's like his butt has been glued to the couch or something. He squints his eyes to look at Angela. "Oh, I see… Well, suit yourself."

Angela can't believe that *that* man is Jordan Catalano's father. Jordan obviously didn't get his looks from him, as well as his manners. Her mouth practically falls open at the lack of interest this man is showing towards his son. There's clearly no point in introducing herself to him; he doesn't care if she's a girl or a *sheep* for that matter.

Turning his head towards the TV again, Jordan's father takes another sip from his beer. "Jordan?"

"Yeah dad…?" Still frozen to the spot, Jordan answers obediently, afraid to contradict his father.

Angela eyes Jordan with disbelief; she knows his father used to beat him, but surely that disgusting creature is no match to him anymore? How can he put up with this…this…disinterest? Why won't he stand up to his father and *demand* some attention?!

"Don't forget my beer." Jordan's father burps out loud.

Angela's eyes now wander to the man lying on the couch; she thought for sure he was gonna say something nice to Jordan or her, but he surprised her by asking for more beer. How can this man be so heartless; to Jordan Catalano of all people?

Walking back into the kitchen, Jordan comes back with a beer can; he throws it over the couch, into his father's lap. As a token of gratitude, his father burps again.

"Come on." Shyly, Jordan shows Angela the way upstairs.

[Outside the restaurant, in the alley, Saturday night]

Rayanne's hands eagerly roam over Brian's clothing. "So, Krakow, you still a virgin?"

"That's none of your business!"

"I think it is, you see; you may be about to like, lose your virginity somewhere in the near future, and well, if you like, weren't a virgin anymore, well, you wouldn't like, have to lose it, you know?"

"If you stop talking like a lunatic, maybe I'll tell you the truth," Eyeing her with disbelief, Brian thinks she makes no sense at all, sometimes. Then again, maybe her quirkiness is just part of her charm.

"Come on, like I really need you tell me that, Krakow. It's like, so obvious, I mean…" With a hint of arrogance, Rayanne smirks at him.

"Look, I don't ask *you* like, how many guys you had sex with, do I? I just think it's like, none of my business how many guys you have slept with, it's like disrespectful to you or something, I don't know."

"Two hundred," Eyeing Brian for his reaction, Rayanne answers him.

"Two hundred, what are you talking about?" Non-comprehending, Brian looks at her. Then his face expresses shock. "You mean, like two hundred guys? You *slept* with two hundred guys?" His voice sounds high-pitched from the shock.

"Yeah, give or take a few, of course…" Pausing for a while, a smirk spreads across Rayanne's face. "Oh man, you should see your face, Krakow! Precious!"

"It's not something to joke about, Rayanne. Sex is not like, a toy, you know. There are feelings involved, and you could get diseases, and you could like, end up pregnant as well."

"Lighten up, Krakow! It's just sex, you know?! It's not like there are any feelings involved, I mean, are there?" Rayanne raises her eyebrow.

"I guess not, I mean, I don't even really like you, come to think of it; but still…"

"Krakow, don't worry."

"Opposites attract, I guess."

"Do they?" Seductively, Rayanne eyes Brian. Her fingers travel over his upper-body, stopping dead at his belt. Keeping her eyes locked onto Brian's the entire time, she unbuckles his belt and zips his fly open. Her hand disappears into his jeans and explores the unfamiliar yet well-known territory.

A deep moan escapes from Brian lips; he closes his eyes for a moment. Rayanne grins, keeping her eyes fixed onto his; until Brian pleadingly gazes at her to continue. Her hands lower his jeans and her head travels below until Brian can look onto the top of it. During a few seconds, Rayanne lifts her eyes up lustfully to Brian; before her lips and tongue set his loins on fire…

[At the Chase's house, Saturday night]

Feeling disappointed when Jordan's car isn't there, Patty, Graham and Rickie arrive at the Chase's house. Hoping Angela and Danielle will be there anyway, they walk through the door. Once standing inside the empty hallway, the silence is deafening. Panicking, Patty walks around the house, shouting out her daughter's names. She runs up the stairs and checks every room and corner, from top to bottom. Walking back down, she looks at Graham, trembling. Her lips start to quiver; shortly after that she breaks down and cries.

For a while, Graham tries to comfort her and they call Amber to find out more. She can't fill them in on their girls' whereabouts either. Rickie and Graham visit the neighbours, hoping they will be able to tell them where Angela and Danielle are.

Unsuccessfully, they return, only learning that Brian Krakow still hasn't come home yet either. Brian's parents don't seem to worry about him though; they trust his instincts and only stimulate him to experience life, and learn from his mistakes. They even leave him behind when they embark on their Christmas Vacation, so they have no *right* to worry about him.

"Have you tried to reach Jordan yet?" Rickie kinda suspects Angela will be over there, maybe she knows what happened to Danielle.

"No, we haven't yet; good thinking, Rickie. Do you know where he lives maybe?" Graham's eyes spark a little hope.

"I know his number, I can like, try to call him, if you'd like?" Flushing, Rickie hopes they won't think too much about *why* he memorized Jordan's phone number.

"Yeah, please do. You know where the phone is, right?" Hoping this call will be the end of their worries, Graham paces around the room restlessly.

Nervously, Rickie dials Jordan's number and waits for the phone to be picked up. "Ah, Mr Catalano? I am so sorry to like, disturb you; but my name's Rickie and I'm a friend of Jordan's. Yes, I know it's late; but my friend Angela and her little sister Danielle are missing and I wanted to ask Jordan if he had seen them."

Tensely, Rickie holds the phone to his ear; listening to Jordan's fathers annoyed mumbling. "Is she a redhead, your friend?"

"Yeah, she's a redhead. Have you seen her tonight?"

"Yeah, she's here," seemingly uninterested, Jordan's father answers.

"So, you didn't see her little sister, did you?"

"Nope, not here," not letting on to any sign of sympathy, the man answers.

Thanking Jordan's dad, Rickie hangs up the phone. "Angela is with Jordan, but Danielle isn't…"

Angrily, Patty reacts, "So, Angela thinks she can just spend the night over at Jordan's without letting us know where she is?! Having us worried out of our minds; she could have been kidnapped, raped, or killed even! And we're here, guessing what bad things could have happened to her, while she's having *sex* with Jordan Catalano again!"

Averting Patty's eyes, Rickie falls silent. Suddenly he feels like he shouldn't be here; he's intruding their privacy.

"At least we know she's alright…" Absent-minded Graham continues, "Which is more than we can say for Danielle…"

"Oh, poor little Danielle…" Patty starts sobbing again.

"That's it, we're going to the police, honey," Graham helps his wife up. "Rickie, will you stay here, just in case…?"

"Yes Mr C, I will. I hope you'll find Danielle soon; I'm worried about her, you know,"

Patty sobs, "Graham, you think we should bring Angela home as well?"

Wrapping his arm around his wife, Graham gives her a quick kiss on the cheek. "I think we should focus on finding Danielle; Angela is safe."

"Safe? *Safe?* Let's hope she's safe, or she'll end up like Sharon Cherski! She's in bed with a teenage boy, for crying out loud; she's not *safe* at all, Graham! Or have you forgotten what it was like?" While she and Graham leave the house, Patty's voice starves out.

Curled upon the couch, Rickie has switched on the TV without actually watching it His head is tumbling with thoughts on Mr Katimski, Angela and Danielle; praying to God they will all be okay.

[Jordan's house, Sunday morning]

A pale ray of sunlight seeps through the curtains in Jordan's bedroom, waking him up. His shoulder feels heavy and when he turns to look at it, he notices Angela's sweet sleeping face upon it. A warm feeling washes over him instantly; unfortunately he's not used to having her around when he awakes. His eyes follow the lines of her face and hair; when she shifts suddenly.

"Hey…" A lazy smile spreads across Angela's face at the sight of Jordan's proximity.

"Hey…" Jordan's fingers trace the outlines of Angela's face. His lips close in to kiss her good morning.

Enjoying the warm welcome, Angela's lips greet Jordan's. "Thanks, for letting me stay here."

"It's okay," his blue eyes glowing softly, Jordan smiles at her reassuringly.

"You know, I don't understand your dad, I really don't. It hurts me to see him treat you like you're *nothing*; when you're like, *everything*."

Tired of talking, she didn't want to bring it up yesterday night. Enjoying each others closeness, they made sweet love together. It felt like they completely bonded without words; it was magical. Being able to fall asleep into Jordan's arms afterwards is better than anything else in the world, even better than sex maybe… Just maybe.

"I know; it like, hurt me too, at first. Then it was like, I adjusted, or something. It's like, we live in the same house, but not together, you know? We like, *tolerate* each other, or something." Wondering if it makes any sense what he's saying, Jordan reads Angela's facial expression.

"Yeah, I get you. I know that's probably like, the best way to do it, but you deserve better, Jordan." Angela lifts her head up, supporting it with her hand.

"Yeah, I know, but it's okay. I get to do my own thing, and he like, lets me have my car, and the band rehearsal and stuff," Jordan's words come out slowly. He is defending his father despite the way he treats him; being able to live your own life has its advantages after all.

"Yeah, he lets you do whatever you like, in a way I guess that's not so bad. Look, if you want me to drop the subject, I will. I just want to see you happy, Jordan." Angela eyes him with concern. Looking out for your self isn't the way it's supposed to be. Your parents are supposed to take care of *you*, not the other way around. It makes you mature too fast.

"I'm happy, just like, being here," Jordan smiles shyly.

Hundreds of butterflies are souring through Angela's body straight away because of his smile and those words. She makes him happy; that's like, *so* good to hear. "I'm happy too, Jordan Catalano. The best place in the world is like, with you." Smiling back at him; Angela kisses him intensely.

Pulling her closer to him, Jordan's hands glide through Angela's hair. Their lips exchange hungry kisses; their tongues explore each others mouths eagerly. Their bodies melt together out of desire and they indulge in their needs by becoming as close as humanly possible.

[Inside Jordan's car, Sunday morning]

"Danielle? Danielle!"

Brutally awakened by her sister's voice, Danielle opens her eyes. Sleepily, she rubs her eyes and looks around, wondering where she is. She doesn't recognize the environment immediately, and her body feels stiff from the awkward sleeping position and cold that protruded her.

"What are you doing here? Did you run away?" Angela has opened the car-door and is leaning inside.

Suddenly, Danielle remembers the events of last night. Reality hits her and her eyes fill up with tears when she looks at her sister. "Angela!" Stretching out her arms, she pulls Angela closer to her; feeling relieved that her nightmare will soon be over.

"Danni, what happened to you?" Cuddling her little sister, Angela's hand strokes Danielle's tangled up blond hair. Backing out of their embrace, she eyes her little sister worried. "Do mom and dad know you're here?"

"No," Danielle answers shortly, and shakes her head vigorously.

Angela's face frowns; her parents must have been worried sick about Danielle. Come to think of it, they must have been worried about *her* as well… She never thought of their feelings, not for a minute. She will be in so much trouble when she returns; her stomach turns around instantly, causing her to feel nauseous.

Coming walking out the house; Jordan eyes Angela and Danielle surprised. "What's your sister, like, doing here?"

"I assume she spent the night in your car… What happened, Danni, why did you run away?"

"Just, you know, stuff. I can't tell you when Jordan is listening in…" Danielle's eyes look past her sister at Jordan.

Angela's eyes ask Jordan to leave her alone for a moment; walking in the direction of the house, he lingers near the front door.

"I saw Rayanne kiss Brian… And I *like* Brian, you know? But he told me that I am like, too young for him. Everybody keeps telling me I'm too young, Angela. They ignore me, and they think I'm a little girl. *You* do it too… I wanna be able to have a real life, just like you, but nobody cares for me. I wanna bet they didn't even miss me…" Showing her admiration and envy, Danielle's little face looks up at her big sister's.

"Danni, you shouldn't have run away, promise me you never ever do that again, okay? If you're sad or mad, you can come to me; I *promise* you I'll make time for you, I swear."

Angela never realised how Danielle felt about her; she just eyed her as the annoying little sister who was always in her way. If only she had been there for Danielle, this never would have happened. From now on, things are going to change.

Spitting in her hand, Angela sticks it out. "Deal?"

Happily, Danielle eyes her sister and spits in her little hand, pressing it firmly against Angela's. "Deal!"

"As for Brian… You *really* saw Rayanne kiss him?!"

Surprised, Angela tries to imagine Brian and Rayanne together, kissing. Her stomach gets twisted in a strange knot, picturing them together. They bicker like, all the time, it doesn't make any sense. And why does Rayanne want to be with every single guy who is interested in Angela? Then again, Rayanne wants to be with every single guy, period.

Danielle nods at her, looking glum.

"Well, Rayanne, she kisses like, many, many, *many* guys; it doesn't mean anything to her, you see? But honey, Brian really is a little too old for you. Trust me, you will find a nice boy, even if you don't believe me right now. You will; just like I did." Eyeing the boy *she* found, Angela's eyes look over her shoulder. A smile spreads across her face.

"But I like *Brian*…" Danielle pouts her lips; big childish eyes look desperately at Angela for help.

"I know you do, Danni. But some day, you will forget him. Then a boy will come along who will sweep you of your feet, and make you forget the world around you…" Angela looks away dreamily.

"Can we like, go home now?" Danielle looks at her sister, yawning and crawling under the blanket again. "I'm tired and very cold…"

"Yes, we're going home now." Angela smiles at her sister reassuring; inside she's feeling deathly afraid of her parent's reaction. Will their concern have the upper hand, or their *anger*…?!

_Danielle VO: "This night has been one of the longest nights of my life! I was so afraid and alone, and I couldn't get warm. I never should have run off like that, but I was just so sad about what happened. And I was like, *mad* at everybody for always ignoring me. I was mad at them for treating me like a kid__. __B__ut after last night, I feel happy to be a little kid. If being a grown-up means solving all your problems alone, then I don't mind being little. If being an adult means boys will break your heart, then I don't want to be big yet.__I missed my mom and dad; and I missed my own warm__ and cosy bed. I missed feeling safe, and I missed being cuddled. I missed being little too much to give it up, I guess…"_

**To be continued…**


	11. Episode 30: Consequences

**A/N: Still unbeta'd, I'll replace it a.s.a.p!**

_*****_

_Angela VO: "Since __last Saturday night - the night Danielle and I didn't come home- it's like I'm living inside a prison and my mom is the guard. We're grounded until further notice and the only conversations I have with my mother are like, the exchanges of common courtesies. It's kinda weird for Rickie though, being caught in the middle of this like, Shakespearian family feud. __My mom __totally freaked out; raging at me like a tornado. She's not half as mad at Danielle as she is at me, because she thinks I should have known better. That is like, so unfair; it's not like Danielle is *stupid* or anything; she like, could have known that my parents would worry for her too, you know? __But I__'m sticking up for Danielle, because she deserves a big sister who's looking out for her; even if she seems to have run behind enemy lines again. Running away must have been really hard on her; she is still a little girl after all, in need of her parents' protection." _

[Monday morning, Chase's house]

"Rickie dear; try not to worry too much today, okay?" Patty asks Rickie slightly worried; trying to comfort him by patting him on the cheek.

_Angela VO: "I__ might as well have stayed put at Jordan's house, being ignored like this. It's like all of a sudden Rickie is the son my mother never had. It's probably because in her eyes, he doesn't do the stupid things I do, like staying out all night and having sex with *dangerous* teenage boys like Jordan Catalano." _

"Ugh." Preventing herself from prolonging her home-arrest, Angela bites her tongue before she spills all of her disgust. Getting hold of her backpack, she walks out the door to wait for Jordan.

Rickie watches Angela leave, and answers Patty, "Yeah, thanks Mrs C, for everything. I'll be glad when this day is over." Mr Katimski will get back his CAT-scan results today, and honestly, Rickie doesn't have a good feeling about it.

"Bye." Hastily, Rickie walks out the door to catch up with Angela.

_Angela VO: "My__ mother actually told me she thought about forbidding me ever to see Jordan again, but fortunately for her, she realised that wouldn't work anyway. I wonder if my mom like, realised the consequences that prohibition would have had. Because I *really* would have moved out of the house, no doubt about it."_

"You okay?" Despite Rickie's trouble he still feels sorry for Angela. But, he is grateful to her mother so he can't really afford to pick a side now. It seems his destiny to be stuck in the middle all his life.

"Yeah, I'm okay. You?" Feeling slightly guilty for being so consumed with her own troubles when Rickie's troubles are far worse, Angela feigns a smile at Rickie.

"Yeah, I'll be fine, I guess…" Rickie's eyes wander off, hiding away the agony and anxiety souring through his body.

From a distance Jordan's car approaches; making them both feel relieved to be able to leave this place and have their minds distracted by the consuming and demanding everyday school life.

[Outside school]

Rickie, Angela and Jordan get out of Jordan's car and walk towards the school building. Getting hold of Angela's hand, Jordan gives Angela a coy smile. Eyeing them as they close in on him, Brian Krakow is sitting down on the outside steps of the school.

Continuing her way into school with Jordan, Angela sends Brian a deadly stare.

_Angela VO: "__It's *Brian's* fault my mother knows I had sex. So basically it's *his* fault my mom like, grounded me and forces me to come directly home after school, keeping me from being alone with Jordan, like almost all the time. Why does he have to keep ruining my life?"_

Greeting Brian hesitantly, Rickie takes a seat next to him. "Hey Brian, so, how's the whole I'm-a-leaper-so-please-ignore-me-thing working for ya?"

"Don't get me started. My life is like, *really* over now; not that I actually *had* one to begin with, but still. Remind me never to try and chase after the truth again; it's like social suicide, you know? Sharon hates me, Angela hates me; and if Jordan were a little bit smarter and had like, his own opinion, he'd probably hate me too. What about you, aren't you supposed to hate me? You know, to show Angela your support or something?!"

"Yeah well, I like *get* Angela and all, but I get your side like, too. If one of my friends walked around with a bunch of papers like that, I'd want to know too, I guess. It just sucks that parents like have, a nose for these things and show up at the worst time you can imagine. It's not like I can totally pick Angela's side right now, living at her parents' house, you know? God, I do *hate* being like, in the middle all the time." Sighing, Rickie stares into oblivion.

"Yeah well, I'll just have to wait till this blows over again, I guess. Knowing Angela something else dramatic will certainly like, happen and she'll forget all about me. I hope…" Brian pauses for a while and then gets up to go into school, asking Rickie, "You coming?"

"Yeah…"

[Inside Mr Katimski's classroom]

The students are minding their own business; some are chatting to each other, while others are practically sleeping. It's chaotic and loud, with no one there to guide them.

"Pssst, Krakow!" Looking around shifty, hoping nobody notices what she's doing; Rayanne passes Brian a note.

Blankly, Brian eyes her and gets hold of the tiny piece of crumpled paper. Their fingers brush over one another, sending tiny sparks of electricity through his body. What does she want this time? To remind him again to shut up about what happened? He just doesn't understand her; she totally ignores him most the time.

His fingers unfold the hastily written note and his eyes take in the irregularly written words. "_Boiler room - next period"_

Rayanne flashes Brian a quick, naughty grin. Surely he understands what she wants from him, doesn't he? Insecurely, she eyes him for his reaction.

Brian's disbelief makes place for a warm feeling in his stomach. The boiler room can only mean *one* thing; she wants to make out with him again. It's not the place where students go to like, talk, or anything. By displaying a grin, he reassures Rayanne he will definitely be there.

Followed by a beautiful blond haired woman in her late thirty's, Mrs Lerner enters the classroom. "Class, if you'll excuse me for a minute?!"

Slowly, the class falls silent and all eyes turn to gaze at the two women in front of the class.

Mrs Lerner continues, "As you all know, we're still waiting for Mr Katimski to recover. Hopefully today will bring us some good news. Until then, we've found you a new substitute teacher. This is Mrs--"

Hastily, the slender looking woman interrupts Mrs Lerner. "I don't go by that name anymore; I use my maiden name now. It's *Ms* Summers."

"Oh, I wasn't aware of that. I do apologize, *Ms* Summers…" Mrs Lerner gives her a non-comprehending look and emphasizes the 'Ms'.

"It's okay, *Mrs* Lerner," Ms Summers smiles at Mrs Lerner a little too innocent. Her eyes dart into the classroom and perceive some students laughing silently.

"Anyway, *Ms* Summers here; will be taking over this class for now. If you could fill her in, that would be great. Now, I'll leave you to it then, I guess. Good luck…" Mrs Lerner leaves the classroom.

Sitting down on her desk, Mr Summers crosses her legs; meanwhile eyeing the seating chart. "Can anyone tell me where Mr Katimski left off?" Her piercing blue eyes examine the students' faces.

Suddenly the classroom is being over flown with eagerly held up boys' hands. Angela takes in the sight of all the willing teenage boys eyeing Ms Summers. Jordan's hand is not up in the air, but he's smiling dreamily and observing the teacher intensely.

_Angela VO: "I really don't understand adolescent boys! You'd think they have seen a real-life woman before, right? Sure, *Ms* Summers is a__n annoyingly perfect beauty with her shiny golden hair, body with all the right curves and eyes bluer than the ocean; but she's like *old* enough to be their mother. And are my eyes deceiving me, or is Jordan actually checking her out as well?!"_

Ms Summers' eyes examine the quiet-looking boy in the back of the class; the only one whose hand *isn't* up in the air. "Umm, Jordan Catalano, could you tell me where Mr Katimski left off?"

Instantly, Jordan flushes, because of all of the attention directed to him; especially *her* attention gets to him. Guiltily, his blue eyes dodge hers.

Before Jordan gets a chance to open his mouth, Angela speaks. "No, he can't tell you, because he's hardly ever *in* this class…" She sends Jordan an angry stare, making him feel she's not thrilled about his drooling and goggling over *Ms* Summers.

"Angela Chase, is it? Why won't you let *Jordan* answer the question I posed to him? Unless he can't speak ofcourse…" Ms Summers' words sound belittling, while her face keeps displaying that far too innocent smile.

Angela's cheeks turn red and she tries to make her self as little as possible. She already hates *Ms* Summers from the bottom of her heart. Jordan's reply never reaches her brain; she's far too busy feeling ashamed and scorned. Her mind stays unfocused during the rest of the hour.

At the sound of the buzzer all the students get up. Over the screeching of chairs and sounds of chatter Ms Summers' voice rings through the classroom. "Mr Catalano, could you please stick around for another moment?"

[Outside the classroom]

Angela's nose is pressed against the glass of the classroom-door; her eyes take in the sight of a nervously acting Jordan and a far too sweet and innocent Ms Summers talking and laughing with him. Her stomach gets twisted in a knot; and jealousy takes over her being.

"Are they even *allowed* to be alone in a classroom together, with like, no supervision, I mean?" Angela eyes Rickie and Rayanne uncertain.

"I think they are; otherwise she wouldn't like, do it, I guess," Rayanne answers dryly, before she continues fiercely. "Oh, come on Angelica! You don't seriously think that Jordan like, wants her?! She's like, old enough to be his *mother*! Ugh, that's like a really gross thought…"

Getting on her toes, Angela presses her nose against the glass again. "Just *look* at her! She's so beautiful! Her eyes are even bluer than Jordan's are! She's like, this perfect creature… And I'm like, not…"

"Angela, besides it being like, totally illegal for a teacher to *do* something with a student; don't you like, trust Jordan?" Eyeing Angela curiously, Rickie leans against the wall.

Angela removes her nose from the glass and slides down onto the floor. "Maybe I don't; I don't know. I mean, it wouldn't be the first time he…" Her eyes drift to Rayanne who is seemingly unaware of Angela's reference to her and Jordan.

"Technically, you weren't even like, together then… And if you ask me, Jordan Catalano is like, totally into you! He would like, never do anything to hurt you again; I'm sure of that."

"Yeah, maybe you're right. But what does she like, want from him anyway?" Angela can't stop sulking. It hurts to think of Jordan with someone else.

When she feels a nudge in her back, Angela startles. Turning around to see what it is, it occurs to her she's blocking the door. In an attempt to look relaxed and bored, she hastily gets up, trying to lean against the nearest lockers. Immediately, Rickie and Rayanne dash off, giving Angela the chance to talk to Jordan alone.

Walking out the door, Jordan is taken by surprise by Angela's presence. "Oh, hey…"

"Hey, so… What did *Ms* Summers want from you?" Trying to sound calm, Angela's eyes take in the sight of Ms Summers sitting at her desk, just before the door shuts.

"She umm… she offered to like, tutor me," Jordan answers hoarsely; flicking his hair behind his ears.

"Oh," Angela can't think of anything else to say without sounding like a jealous girlfriend. When it occurs to her she *is* his girlfriend and she has a right to know what he is doing; she continues steadily. "So, are you gonna do it? I mean, will you take her up on her offer?"

"Yeah, I think so. I mean, Brain like, won't do it anymore, so…" Insecurely, Jordan eyes Angela. Is she like, mad at him? She embarrassed him in front of Ms Summers and the whole class earlier. But she signed him up for tutoring in the first place, so why can't she just be happy for him?

"Yeah, I guess you're right. You should do it; I mean, let her teach you… I mean, like, *tutor* you…" Angela's lips have trouble forming the right words; everything sounds like it has a double meaning all of a sudden.

"You okay?" Jordan seeks out Angela's hand.

"Yeah, just, you know; the whole fight with my parents and being grounded and stuff, it keeps me thinking, I guess…" Trying to cover up her true feelings, Angela uses another excuse. "It sucks that I can't hang out with you after school anymore, you know?"

"Yeah, I know. Hey, you could like, skip your last hour and umm, meet me in the boiler room?" Jordan's eyes spark with hope and mischief.

"Yeah, you're right; we'll always have the boiler room…" A smile lights up Angela's face at the thought of being alone with Jordan again, right back in the place where it all started.

[In the hospital]

In a small chamber with room for only *one* bed, Mr Katimski is lying down. His life-partner is sitting on a chair next to the bed browsing through a magazine, when a doctor and nurse come walking in.

"Richard, how are you feeling?" The nurse gives him a smile.

"Gee whiz, I've had better days, I can tell you that!" Smiling faintly at nurse, Mr Katimski turns his eyes to the doctor.

The doctor greets both Mr Katimski and his partner before he continues, "We have your CAT-scan results back, Mr Katimski. It seems… that you are suffering from a rather large brain-tumour…"

"Gee whiz…"

"Oh Richard…" Grabbing hold of Mr Katimski's hand, his partner's sorrowful eyes seek out Richard's.

The doctor flashes both men an awkward smile. "The tumour *is* operable, but because of its size and location; the operation is extremely risk full. There's actually only a five percent chance you will survive this…"

"Five percent… That's not much…" Mr Katimski pauses for a moment before he continues, "What will happen if you umm, *don't* operate on me?"

"If we don't operate on you, you will probably die within a year…" The doctor eyes him seriously. "I need your consent to perform the surgery, but I understand you need some time to think about this. However; the sooner we can operate, the better."

"Gee whiz…" Mr Katimski's eyeballs are rolling in their sockets from digesting the information he just heard. He has to make a choice between staying alive for a year tops, and undergoing a surgery with only a small chance at survival.

The doctor and nurse leave the room; while the two men are left behind, eyeing each other and trying to hold back their tears.

[Girls' restroom]

Talking to each other, Angela and Sharon walk into the girls' restroom.

"So, your parents weren't even like, *mad* at you when they found out?" Angela looks at Sharon sceptical.

"Maybe it was my luck that my *dad* found out first; and broke the news to my mom like, gently, I guess. I still don't get it, you know? It's like, I'm still waiting for the news to sink in, and have them yell at me, or something."

"Yeah, it's like, way too freaky for parents to remain this calm, when something this huge happens; especially to their only daughter!"

"I know! But you know, my dad really has changed since his heart attack, so in a way it makes sense, I guess. But I'm not risking anything foolish yet, just in case…" Smirking at Angela, Sharon gazes into the mirror and puts on her lipstick.

"You're better off than I am, that's for sure…" Angela leans into the wall and her eyes drift off into oblivion.

Lowering her lipstick, Sharon eyes Angela via the mirror. "Not that I'm on *their* side or anything; but you could have guessed they'd be worried sick about you when you stayed out all night… Even I wouldn't be like, dumb enough to pull a stunt like that. One measly night isn't worth risking a life-long supply of house arrest for; it's like committing social suicide…"

"Ugh, please don't remind me; I'm like, *living* the social-suicide as we speak…"

_Angela VO: "__Sharon has a point, but I'm not going to admit it. It's become a matter of standing my ground now. In my humble opinion, giving in would be equal to like, giving up…"_

[The boiler room]

Nonchalantly, Rayanne is leaning against the wired fence. Her eyes are looking around the room shifty with every tiny sound she hears, afraid someone will come down and catch her while she's waiting around for…Brian Krakow.

Standing on the other side of the door to the boiler room, Brian hesitates to go through it. Nervously, he scans the hallways for spectators. When the coast is clear he opens the door. His eyes adjust to the semi-dark surroundings and he spots Rayanne downstairs. The sight of that tough girl hanging around there acting kinda nervously; is too unreal *not* to register with his camera. Quickly, Brian snaps a shot of her before he walks further down to encounter her.

When Brian approaches her, Rayanne has difficulty posturing herself. Her voice sounds cool and calm when she greets him; like they ran into each other down here by accident. "Hey."

Getting rid off the camera hanging around his neck, Brian puts it on a nearby stool; greeting Rayanne by grinning shyly. "Hey."

Suddenly, Rayanne's face is being lit up by a naughty grin and her eyes spark mischief; like someone else took over her body out of the blue. With her eyes fixed onto Brian's face she walks around him in circles, eyeing her prey like a predator.

Brian's body tries to keep up with her movements; meanwhile he can't stop chuckling insecurely at her behaviour. For a moment he hesitates, wondering if he should ask her why she is doing that. Deadly afraid he might break the spell and scare her off; his mouth opens anyway to phrase a question, "Wh--"

"Sshh!" Rayanne shuts Brian up by placing her finger on his lips.

Rayanne's sultry stare travels over Brian's body, right before her lips brush over his in a promising kiss. Getting hold of Brian's collar, Rayanne's hands compel him to turn around; his back almost touching the wired fence.

Hungrily, she kisses Brian and crashes her full bodyweight into his; his back smashing into the fence forcefully. Brian's eyes flutter open and startled he grumbles out a low moan; his hands reaching to the sides for a place to hold on to.

"You're like, *wild*, you know that?!" A bit scared but still full of wonder, Brian eyes Rayanne, his heart racing like a maniac.

"So? You say that like it's a *bad* thing…" In a kinky growl, Rayanne curls her lip up at him.

Brian can't help but laugh on the inside. Maybe she's wild; maybe she's not. Then again, what does *he* have to compare her with? If he keeps rejecting her, she'll come to her senses and walk out on him.

"It's not; it's just, well…" Brian is lost for words; thinking doesn't come natural to him when Rayanne is around.

"Yeah, I know, the whole *virgin* thing…"

"Could you, like, stop making fun of me, just this once?"

"Does it *look* like I'm making fun of you?" Pausing for a while, Rayanne stares at Brian with her mouth open; tapping her shoe on the floor impatiently.

"You know what, Krakow, bite me! I don't even know why I, like, came down here in the first place. I've got like, better places to be; and like, better people to do, you know?!" Angrily, Rayanne barges up the stairs, walking out the door without looking back.

"Good job, Brian Krakow. Leave it up to you to be left all alone in the boiler room…"

Brian bangs his head into the wired fence several times; before turning around, leaning against the fence and shutting his eyes. His chance of becoming a participant instead of the ever by-standing spectator has passed him by again; and he can't blame anyone else but himself for this self-inflicted pain.

[In the guidance councillor office]

Cathy Kryzanowski has asked Rickie to come in and see her. Nervously, Rickie sits down in the appointed chair, eyeing her curiously.

"Rickie… We got a call from the hospital…" Mrs Kryzanowski continues hesitantly, "Mr Katimski seems to be suffering from a [pause] brain tumour…"

"A what?! A *brain* tumour; you're like, serious? So, what's gonna happen to him now?" Rickie's eyes radiate disbelief; his hands twitch nervously.

"They're not sure yet; they can perform a surgery on him, but there's only a small chance he'll make it out alive…"

"How small?" Rickie wants to know, no matter how much it may hurt him.

"Only five percent…"

"And if they *don't* operate on him…?" The question slipped Rickie's mouth before he could stop it.

"Then he'll probably die within a year…" Mrs Kryzanowski feels immensely sorry for Rickie, who's obviously struggling to stay strong.

Rickie is processing the information he has just been told. His dear friend and the only person who *really* seems to care for him as a son; is going to die. Within a year, or maybe even sooner. How can life be like, so unfair all the time?!

"Rickie? Are you okay?" Mrs Kryzanowski tries to get eye-contact with him. "I also have some *good* news for you; I know probably nothing can cheer you up now, but maybe it will ease your worries a little…"

Hardly seeing anything because of the tears that are blocking his vision, Rickie looks up at her. He can't think of anything that might be able to cheer him up right now.

"If you want to, you can have a look around in the Pride House. They've got a place for you, from next week on."

"Oh, well, that's like, convenient now, I guess…" The irony strikes Rickie; the same day he finds out his care-taker will die shortly, a place opens up for him in a new home.

At least his *body* won't have to be homeless anymore; even if his *heart* will remain so for a long time to come.

[Boiler room, during Angela's last hour]

Calling out Jordan's name, Angela walks down the stairs of the damp, scarcely lit basement. "Jordan? Are you down here?" When Angela reaches the last step, she spots Brian Krakow jumping up hastily. Instead of asking him annoyedly what on earth he is doing down here, she ignores him.

_Angela VO: "I've go__t like, a very good hunch about Brian's presence down here, thanks to Danielle. I still can't imagine *Rayanne* making out with Brian though…What does she see in him? And why would someone intelligent like Brian Krakow make out with someone like Rayanne Graff? Is she like, a substitute to him? A substitute for *me*?"_

As he walks past her rushed, Brian's eyes flash into Angela's direction. The shame is clearly displayed on his face. He walks up the stairs, and bumps into Jordan Catalano who opens the door just as Brian wants to open it. "Great," Brian mumbles to himself.

Raising his shoulders, Jordan eyes him and walks down the steps; having already lost his interest in Brian again. When he catches the sight of the red-haired girl waiting for him against the wired fence, a smile spreads across his face.

"Hey." Gaining his proximity, Angela smiles at Jordan warmly.

"Hey." while studying Angela's face, Jordan's eyes smile; the fingers of his left hand reach out to stroke her hair.

Their faces draw nearer to engage in a teasingly slow passionate kiss; their hands wander the familiar yet never boring territory. Their kiss intensifies and demandingly, Jordan presses his body into Angela's. Her back bumps into the wired fence; her hands disappear under Jordan's shirt.

The feel of Jordan's arousal grinding into Angela's body, is enough to elicit tiny moans from her lips. Button by button his fingers gain excess to her silky skin; caressing her gently at first, continuing to knead her breasts until her moans become louder and her breathing more ragged. Stealthy fingers unhook her bra and slide her blouse from her shoulders; in almost one, subtle movement. His tongue wanders from her hot, demanding mouth over her almost fully exposed upper-body.

[In the girls' restroom]

Looking almost pensive, Rayanne is sitting on the window ledge.

"What are you like, still doing here?" Rickie asks Rayanne, surprised.

"Dunno." Fiddling with her shoe-laces, Rayanne answers Rickie without looking at him.

"Did you like, hear about Mr Katimski already?"

"Oh no, Rickie…" Giving Rickie her full attention, Rayanne notices his eyeliner isn't surrounding his eyes neatly anymore; the look of someone who has been crying is too familiar to mistake for something else.

"He… he…" Rickie starts sobbing.

Jumping down from the window ledge, Rayanne embraces Rickie, rubbing her hands up and down his back. "Oh Rickie, is it like, *really* that bad?"

She just can't believe it; since she performed in the play she developed a soft spot for Mr Katimski as well.

"He's got, like, a brain tumour, and if they don't, like, operate on him, he'll like, *die*, within a year…" Irregular breaths keep interrupting Rickie's sentence while tears are streaming down his face.

Backing out of his embrace with Rayanne, Rickie continues in an unsteady voice, "But the cha--…the chance he will survive the surgery is only like, five percent…"

Holding back the tears she feels welling up in her eyes, Rayanne eyes Rickie sorrowful. Normally she blurts out whatever comes to mind, but nothing seems to come to her mind right now. She can't find words strong enough to express herself.

Rickie knows Rayanne well enough to see she's struggling to express herself. He calms down a bit before he asks Rayanne, "You think… they'll let me see him?"

"I'm like, *positive* they will! They're probably rolling out the red carpet for the great Enrique Vasquez as we speak… Let's not keep them waiting, amigo!" Rayanne isn't sure *who* she's trying to cheer up, herself or Rickie. She whisks Rickie away from the girls' restroom, off to the hospital.

[In the school hallways]

Once Brian has reached his locker he suddenly becomes aware of his missing camera. He left it in the boiler room. The same boiler room he was in like, half an hour ago; with Rayanne. That is, before he chased her off.

But it's still the same boiler room where Angela and Jordan are down now, doing God-knows-what. He seriously doesn't want to be confronted with Jordan's groping hands all over Angela, let alone his erection poking at her somewhere it shouldn't be.

Brian's thankfullness of *not* getting caught while Rayanne and he were sorta making out down there, disappears at the thought of Jordan and Angela having sex, like, again.

But his camera is far too expensive to be left down there, ready for the taking. He has no choice but to go into the dragon's den…

For the second time that day, Brian's hand lingers on the door to the boiler room. This time, he dreads going down there even more than the first time. He inhales deeply, opens the door and sneeks down the steps as silently as he can; hoping Jordan and Angela won't hear him climb down the stairs…

A flashback to the unfolding scene in the storage room of Angela's dad's restaurant, penetrates his brain. After reaching the left step, Brian looks around wondering; to his surprise Angela and Jordan are nowhere to be seen.

Relieved he walks over to his camera and picks it up from the stool; instantly freezing on the spot when he hears muffled noises coming from a distant corner. Against better judgement, he cocks his head around the corner and focusses his eyes into the direction of the sounds; hardly perceiving anything but a vague silhouette.

He picks up his camera to zoom in to the direction of the silhouette and can clearly make out that the silhouette isn't *one* person, but *two*. Angela and Jordan, all tangled up. Brian catches his breath; as uphauled as he should be by watching Jordan's tongue flicker over Angela's almost naked upperbody, he can't help but be turned on. For a brief moment he lowers the camera; hiding around the corner, wondering what to do.

Slowly Brian turns his body around the corner again, holding up the camera like an extension of his eye. It's like, looking at them through the lense of his camera, makes it *legal* somehow. He's not a voyeur, he's not even a dirty little man. He's an artist, painting a picture of the steaming hot love between two young, beautiful people.

Captivated, Brian's finger clicks away; catching Angela's extacy and Jordan's teasing tongue. The muffled noises become clearer and louder, sounding like passionate moans; outdrowning the sound of Brian's loudly pounding heart.

Things seem to intensify all of a sudden; Angela's hands unbuckle Jordan's belt while Jordan's hands start to lower Angela's shorts. Swiftly, Brian ducks back behind the corner again; his heart still throbbing wildly because of his arousal and anxiety. He just *can't* take shots of them actually *doing* it, can he? He's already gone too far as it is like, *now*…

For a split second, his fingers relax, releasing the camera from their tense grip. In a reflex Brian drops himself onto his knees in order to catch his precious equipment before it has a chance to shatter onto the floor. Thankfully the camera-strap is secured around his neck, so the camera dangles onto his chest safely.

"Did you hear that? I thought I like, heard something, didn't you?" Jordan's voice becomes clearer as he approaches the corner behind which Brian is hiding.

Startled, Brian scrambles to his feet and makes a run for it, up the stairs; as fast as his quivering legs can carry him. His heart is beating so fast it's threatening to dig itself out of his chest. He can hear loud thumping footsteps closing in on him quickly; and just before he reaches the door, he's being tugged down by his feet.

Defeated Brian falls down onto the floor, pointing his camera upward to keep it from being damaged. After his back clashes to the floor, his hands quickly cover up his face; expecting Jordan to pound him into a bleeding pile of raw meat.

When nothing happens, he lowers his hands and stares into the silhouette of Jordan hovering over him. Over Jordan's head a bright light is shining, absorbing the light from Jordan's body and face. He's actually thankful he can't read the expression in those cool, blue eyes; afraid of what they will make him feel.

"What were you like, *doing*, down here, Brain?" Jordan's voice sounds calm; his body still hovering over him threateningly, states the opposite.

A million thoughts pop into Brian's head; all things which he can't tell Jordan. So he gives him the short version, and the *actual* reason for his precence down here. "I um, came to get my camera."

"Oh…" Jordan answers shortly, stepping back slightly.

Brian scrambles to his feet yet again; his eyes flick down the steps where Angela approaches, just buttoning up the last button of her blouse again. Her face looks flushed and her hair dishevelled. Her eyes express her contempt for him; like she *knows* what he just witnessed, and even knows he captured it on film. But maybe he's reading too much into the look she's sending him; after all she's still mad at him, like the look she sent him this morning proved to him.

He prefers her rage being unleashed on him to this demeaning silence of hers. Her eyes pierce right through him; uncovering all his deepest, darkest secrets. Unable to move because of her paralizing stare, Brian just lays there for a brief moment; unable to unlock his eyes from hers. Like a cripled man who just regained his strength, he finally gets to his feet and leaves the boiler room; feeling like a pathetic excuse for a man.

_Angela VO: "Why does Brian Krakow always seem to be around to like, mess up my life?! Isn't it enough he got me grounded for like, __the rest of my life?! Every time Jordan and I are about to have sex, he *magically* shows up, killing the mood. Did my mom, like, send him after me or something, like a big, Brian-shaped birth-control pill?"_

[At the restaurant, around dinner time]

_Angela VO: "Most nights my dad still has time to fix us dinner at home__; but certain nights he's like, busier than usual or something, and we eat at the restaurant. So; basically I'm like, grounded, but my mom makes an exception by releasing me from my cage to like, *feed* me. Oh joy. I get to spend the evening in a place I don't want to be in, facing the person I don't want to see, doing the thing I don't want to do in front of her, like eat. __My dad is like, okay to hang around with; he's like not so judgmental as my mother. If it were up to him, Danielle and I wouldn't have to be grounded anymore; I like overheard them argue, you know. But he's busy cooking dinner for all his guests, so I'm stuck here with my wicked mother and little sister." _

In the otherwise almost full restaurant, Angela, Danielle and Patty are sitting down at one of the tables. Graham is working his magic in the kitchen, while Hallie is serving their customers with a smile. Danielle gets up from her seat and skips into the kitchen to hang out with her father.

Stabbing her fork into the table mindlessly, Angela is slouching in her seat, bored. Her mother keeps urging her to, "Stop it!" Angela's response is an ugly face, with a tongue sticking out of her mouth.

After a while Patty grabs the fork from Angela's hand. "Stop it; I already told you a thousand times before!" She's not only irritated by her eldest daughter's mindless wrecking of her husband's new table; Angela's attitude is rubbing up against her badly.

"Could you like, give me a freaking break?"

"Why won't you stop sulking, and try to act a little less hostile…"

"I won't stop sulking, and if you stop, like, being the enemy who is ruining my life, I'll stop acting less hostile…"

"Young lady; you chose to *act* like a little child, now you have to deal with the consequences of being treated like one!" Patty's heldback anger is reaching the surface rapidly.

"It's *so* unfair! Do you have any idea how much you're ruining my life, like, with your *stupid* rules? You're not *half* as mad with Danielle as you're with me!"

"That's not true, Angela. You're both grounded, and you both pulled the same ridiculously dangerous stunt."

"Yeah, but she like, doesn't have a life anyway, or a boyfriend! And you were just *worried* about her when she stayed away; while you got mad as hell at me!" Sick of looking at her mother and sick of dealing with her rules, Angela looks away from her.

"Thank God Danielle hasn't been stupid enough to let some guy sweet-talk her into bed yet! You *knew* what you were doing when you stayed away, and Danielle didn't!" Patty can't hold her voice down any longer; the feelings of rage and despair are consuming her.

"Oh, I knew it was about Jordan! You still don't like, understand that I *love* Jordan Catalano, do you? And having sex with him was my own choice, because I was like, ready for it! Besides, how can you be judging me for something you did too, at my age?!"

_Angela VO: "I am *__so* close to walking out of here. If my mother doesn't say something really good to me now, something that will righteous her behaviour; I'm leaving and I'm not coming back. I don't care where I have to sleep, but I'm *not* going home, ever again. I won't ler her ruin my life anymore!"_

Suddenly aware of being inside her husband's newly opened restaurant; it occurs to Patty that picking a fight isn't the ideal form of advertising.

Patty hisses at Angela, "I get that you love Jordan, believe me, I do. And I really hope that you didn't have sex with him before you actually felt ready, because sex is a big deal. And ofcourse, I had sex too, but that's not the point here. And maybe I even stayed out without permission once or twice; but again, that's besides the point as well. Don't you think *my* mother was pissed at me for doing it? I didn't agree with her back then, ofcourse I didn't, but if she hadn't set me straight, things would have spiraled out of control. And I know now, she only did it because she loved me; no matter how hard that is to understand for you right now. Don't you get it Angela, I don't want to see you ending up pregnant like Sharon Cherski did, and waisting away your life and future."

"Sharon isn't pregnant…" Angela replies dryly, like she didn't hear another word her mother said.

_Angela VO: "For now, my __mother's words are good enough to keep me from running away. I *get* that she's scared I'll end up pregnant, but I'm not like, stupid, am I?"_

"No, I know she's not; but she came unbelievably close, and so can you. Believe me, I know how close you can get to thinking you're…" Patty pauses for a while, thinking back to an uncertain time in her life, happening only a few months ago.

"Mom, I get it, okay? Jordan and I are like, doing it safe, all the time. Would you please just let me spend more time with him again? Before I grow old and even more ugly?"

"I'll ease up on the rules a bit; you can stay out after school again, but… you still have to be back home at supper time. And you have to promise me your homework won't be affected by it, ofcourse. As for parties and all other things that take place during the evening and night; they are *still* forbidden. You have to realize the seriousness of what you put your dad and me through that night…"

"Thanks mom; I'd even hug you, you know, if…"

"Yes, I know…" Patty smirks at her daughter; given the promise of a hug means a lot, coming from Angela.

[In the hospital]

"Gee whiz, Enrique!" Enthusiastically Mr Katimski greets his visitor, looking up from his bed. "And Miss Graff; what a *pleasure* is it to have both of you here in this somewhat umm, unfit establishment…"

Thinking how he doesn't look deadly ill at all, Rickie smiles cheerfully at Mr Katimski. "Hey Mr K!" He walks up to him and gives him a hug; reluctant to release him.

"Hey Mr K, so, how's the food in here?" Pacing around the room nervously, Rayanne keeps her distance.

Smirking at her, Mr Katimski answers sarcastically, "Please, can we talk about umm, something cheerful, instead of the so-called umm, food of this establishment?!"

"So, I heard about your…" Rickie swallows away a lump in his troat before he continues, "tumour…"

"Enrique, don't worry about this old man. I'll be fine; and so will *you*…We've decided to go with the umm, surgery, by the way; I intend to beat the umm, odds!"

"So, when will they like,… operate on you?" Rickie feigns a smile, not able to share Mr Katimski's enthusiasm.

"Tomorrow, Enrique, tomorrow," Mr Katimski eyes ask for Rickie's understanding when he continues, "It's a slim chance, but it's still a chance, you see? Who knows what will happen if I umm, wait around for this umm, tumour, to eat my brain, you know?"

"I never like, thought of it that way, I guess. This is better, it really is…" Rickie stares down at his hands in his lap which are slowly turning into a blur, because of the tears clouding up his eyes.

"Gee whiz, cheer up, Enrique! I told you, I will *beat* the umm, odds!" Mr Katimski's hand reaches out to clumsily pat Rickie's arm.

"But what if you like, *don't*?"

"Enrique, enrique… It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all… Remember that…"

"I will never forget you, ever. You were like, the *only* one who really cared for me, and like, the only one I could be *me* around; like, without being judged. You made like, all the difference in the world to me. Thank you, Mr K, for everything…" Once again Rickie embraces Mr Katimski, releasing his tears freely now.

"Enrique, it was my pleasure and *great* privilige to umm, take care of someone like you. I ensure you we will meet again; if not tomorrow, then another day…" With the young boy in his arms, Mr Katimski sobs silently; he's more afraid of what will happen to Rickie than he is about his own future.

Reluctantly, Rickie releases himself from their embrace and takes a few steps back to give Rayanne the opportunity to say something to Mr Katimski before they leave.

"Thanks, Mr K, for like, giving me a sence of direction and for like, believing in me. No one has ever done that before; well, maybe Rickie here has, but, he doesn't really like, count, if you know what I mean…" Rayanne smirks at him. "Good luck tomorrow."

Without looking back Rayanne leaves the room abruptly. Outside in the hallway she takes her flask from her coat pocket and pours down most of its contents in one sip; in order to drown her sorrows in a numbing oblivion.

"Yeah, good luck tomorrow, Mr K. Until we meet again, I guess…" Once more, Rickie walks up to Mr Katimski and takes hold of his hand. Their eyes do the rest of the talking; then Rickie leaves the room.

Looking back over his shoulder once more, he tries to memorize the kind and wise man for good; fearing this may be the last time he lays his eyes on him.

**To be continued…**


	12. Episode 31: Face Your Demons

**A/N: Unbeta'd again, I'll replace it a.s.a.p!**

****

_R__ayanne VO: "Most people who know me, they think I'm like, having a blast and don't give a crap where my life is headed. Maybe they're like, right in some ways, but it's not like I *really* don't care, it's just, you know, it's difficult being me, or whatever. Sometimes it feels like I'm living the dream, you know, but then I like, wake up again, hung-over and all alone, and I realise my life is just like, this big nightmare that needs to be drowned in forgetfulness quickly."_

Slowly, Rayanne awakes from a superficial, restless sleep. Her tongue feels like a piece of parchment that's stuck to the roof of her mouth. "Oooh…" Every morning the ritual is the same; her head is pounding and throbbing and she *swears* never ever to drink another drop. But there's like only *one* decent remedy against the pain, the throbbing, and the insatiable thirst, and that's too get drunk again, quickly. Besides, the month she like, went sober, was like, the longest one in her life. Life seemed to pass by annoyingly slow, without any real stuff like, happening in it. Life's like a drag when she's sober, with all its bright colours, loud sounds and deeply wounding pains. In a numb state of mind and body, everything's so much easier to deal with, because honestly, most things just pass her by.

Her trembling muscles hinder her in turning down the sheets (which still bear the scent of alcohol and cigarette-smoke from who knows how many get-togethers and parties recently), and the sunlight shining through the curtains feels like a laser-beam being pointed at her eyes, radiating right into her brain. "Ugh!" Sitting up straight feels like the accomplishment of the day, but even more sadly it will probably be like, the highlight of this pathetic day.

Raking her hands through her tangled-up hair, Rayanne takes a few steps away from her bed. With every step, there seems to be someone playing the drums, on the *inside* of her head. Looking around, there's no trace of Amber.

_Rayanne VO: "__I'm all alone, again. Wow, there's a shock…Not." _

If it weren't for the marching band in her head, the silence would be deafening. There are like, some mornings she feels a little better than today. Those are the mornings she usually turns on the radio to drown out the truth being screamed at her from the quiet. It's hard to have no one to talk to, and even harder to have no one who takes care of you. It's hard to have the silence emphasize your loneliness.

Having reached the bathroom, she eyes her dishevelled reflection in the mirror. Make-up seems to live a life of its own when she's asleep, and it seeks out like, the strangest places to settle down for the night. Almost every morning, this straw-headed, black-eyed panda bear stares back at her. After throwing a pile of clothes -reeking of boys and bars- onto the floor, Rayanne steps into the shower.

_Rayanne VO: "Crap, I like, need a drink right now! I practically tried to drown my brain in alcohol last night, but I still like, couldn't stop thinking about the obnoxious, unwanted inhabitant of my head. Screw Brian Krakow; screw him and his stupid curls. I should be like, charging him, for__ occupying Rayanne Graff's valuable and private brain-space, you know? I've got like, more important stuff to like, try and forget. I mean, Mr K's surgery ended in a crappy coma and Rickie's like, having a hard time dealing with it. So, why, no matter how much I like, drink, is the first thing that keeps bubbling back up into my mind like, Krakow?!"_

**[The next morning, Brian Krakow's room]**

Reliving the moment, Brian's eyes linger on the developed pictures of Angela and Jordan making out in the boiler room. His fingers trace over the erotic image of Angela with her almost fully exposed upper body, bitterly thinking this is probably the closest he will ever get to touching her. They look so good together; the picture could be used for a commercial or something. If it weren't like, this hot and steamy, ofcourse.

Consumed by his aroused feelings, he can't stop looking at the pictures. He hasn't been able to put them aside ever since he developed them. His mind has been occupied with the pictures; and the moans that went along with it haunt him night and day.

Usually, looking at the pictures protrudes images of Rayanne onto his mind as well. The few things she's taught him were like, awesome and all, but being with her is nothing serious. She can't compare to Angela, no matter how hard he tries to make Rayanne take her place. It's not like she's that reliable anyway; one day she'll like, want him, and the next she'll push him away. It's like, enjoyable to be around her, freakishly enough. Although, it's not like, *that* strange, considering her great body and even better looking legs. But she's just not the kind of girl he could see himself getting married to.

"Brian, there's a bowl of oatmeal, still waiting for you!"

Startled from his thoughts by his mother's voice, Brian drops the picture to the floor. Afraid either his mom or dad will find the pictures in his room; he stuffs them into his backpack again, following the same ritual he has performed since their development last week.

If either of his parents finds these pictures, there's no telling how they will react. His behaviour will be analyzed thoroughly, he can hear them talking about his crazy cravings already. Sometimes he wishes his parents were like, *normal* human beings. Normal parents, you know, the kind that will get mad at him for harbouring pornographic pictures instead of encouraging him to discover his sexual desires. However, his parents will search his mind for abnormalities and fight each other about their perspectives on their son's self-destructive behaviour and longings to stay an outsider instead of a participant in the wonderful world of sex and vibrators as loud as lawnmowers.

With his bag clutched tightly against his body, Brian walks down the stairs.

**[English class, Ms Summers]**

"How are things with Mr Katimski? Does anyone know how the surgery went?" Pacing through the classroom, Ms Summers eyes her students one by one.

"He's like, in a coma, you know. So, basically, they know like, shit." After finishing her sentence, Rayanne shoves the lollipop she withdrew earlier, back in her mouth.

_Rayanne VO: "Lollipops are like, the only things that taste like, strong enough to __cover up the rancid taste of hangovers and throw-up from the night before. That, and they're like, the only food-group Amber has lying around the house. Oh, and they like, totally satisfy my orally fixated cravings, you know?" _

"Oh, well, I'm sorry to hear that."

"Why would you like, be sorry? You don't even like, *know* the guy. If he hadn't-- you know-- you wouldn't even be here!" Anger is fleeing over Rayanne's face.

_Rayanne VO: "Why would __'Ms' Summers feel like, sorry for him? Why can't people be like, themselves, instead of acting and showing that phoney politeness, like, all the time? It's like, hard enough without guessing who someone really is. Crap, it's like enough to make a person drink…" _

"Thank you, Miss Graff, for pointing that out to me. No, I don't know the man, but I've come to understand he was loved by many people, and he's far too young to be suffering from something like this. The heavens are full enough as it is already."

"Do you believe in heaven, Ms Summers?" Totally disregarding the sensitivity of the subject, Brian raises his hand and bluntly asks his teacher's opinion.

_Rayanne VO: "'Do you believe in heaven, Ms Summers?' Ugh, just like, hear him! __Teacher's pet Brian Krakow. Yes, Ms Summers, I'll show you heaven, Ms Summers. He's like, so obnoxious right now; I wanna push him into the wall and shut him up by kissing him wildly. He won't know what hit him! Ha, no one will know what hit them, Rayanne and Krakow, now there's a freak-show they won't forget!" _

"If you mean heaven as a place where we will all go after we've died, a place where we will be happy all the time, I'm not sure. If you believe in heaven, you have to believe in hell, as well. Who determines whether a person deserves a place up above, or down below? If you made a few mistakes in life, does it mean you deserve to go to hell? I for one don't intend to live my life in fear of my after-life. I'm human, so I make mistakes. But I do believe in seconds chances during *this* lifetime. God knows some of us have paid enough for our mistakes already…" At the last words, Ms Summers pauses at Jordan's table, her eyes fixated on his a little too long.

"Did you see that?! Tell me I'm not imagining things!" With her mouth open, Angela stares at Ms Summers over by Jordan's table.

"You know, I'm kinda getting the whole Mrs-Robinson-vibe from her now, if you get my drift…" Entertained, Rayanne watches the scene unfold. "Hey, anyone got some popcorn for me?"

"Rayanne! It's not funny! I can't believe her, you know?" Stumped for words, Angela's eyes keep scanning Ms Summers and Jordan.

_Rayanne VO: "Let's shake things up a __little; this class is like, so boring! This'll be like; the most fun I've had all day, how sad it that?"_

"Ms Summers? What do you think of um, like, an adult who has sex with someone like, half his or her age? Should they like, go to heaven or hell?" Boldly, Rayanne eyes Ms Summers.

"As long as both parties agree, and neither of them is misusing their status, and the youngest person isn't under age, I think it's not illegal or sinful enough to send them to hell. But then again, I don't make the calls, do I?"

"Hey, I'm all for free love, you know? No need to convince me!"

"No, I'm not saying--"

"I am."

Whispering, Rayanne leans into Angela. "You know, I have to respect her opinion on this one, Angelica. She had no business like, asking about Mr K, but hey, when it comes to love, or you know, *sex*… rules like, shouldn't apply. She's like, the devil, disguised as an angel, or something. You gotta admire that!"

"I hate her, and that's like, *my* humble opinion."

**[The Pride House, same day]**

Looking up against a gorgeous looking manor, Rickie swallows away a lump in his throat. Finally, he scrapes together the courage to ring the doorbell. A little later, he is being guided through wood-clad hallways to a distant office. The door opens and Rickie is being escorted inside the office. Shivers are running down his spine at the sight of the painting of a gruff looking military type of guy.

"Mr Vasquez, welcome to Pride House!" Contradicting his stiff exterior, the man's voice sounds warm.

"Thank you, I guess. I was like, a little worried to come here, you know?"

"I understand, most of the adolescents in here, came in looking just like you. It's our job to make them feel at home, like it is to make you feel at home as well. It may not exactly be home, sweet home, but we try to maintain the same rules any normal family would have. We feel that our strength should come from family-values as much as family-loving."

"I would *love* to be part of a normal family, I think living here won't be so bad…"

"Let me show you your room, afterwards I'll take you over our rules and regulations and then you can decide whether you accept our offer or not."

Walking through the manor, Rickie encounters several other inhabitants. The house looks strict and straightened up and kind of old-fashioned. Walking up the great oak staircase, they reach another hallway. After passing a few doors, the man holds open a door, guiding Rickie into a room with an arm-gesture.

"If you wish, you are allowed to paint the walls. The furniture is optional as well, if you have some of your own, you're welcome to bring it along. But we have learned from experience most of our residents don't exactly have those means."

Looking around, a smile spreads across Rickie's face. The room is bigger than the one he used to have, and a huge window provides it with a lot of light. The bed is a wooden four-poster bed with red velvet curtains, no way is he gonna change that for anything else! There's even a desk with a TV on it.

"You know, I think I'll feel right at home here!"

**[After Ms Summers' class]**

On his way out, Brian's eyes glide over some letters lying on Ms Summers' desk. Quickly, he looks around the classroom to see Ms Summers talking to a couple of students; her back turned towards him. Dropping his bag to the floor, Brian picks up the upper envelope and carefully reads the addressee. _"Mrs Catalano." _

Flicking through the other letters, Brian reads the name 'Catalano' on every envelope. Why would she say her name is *Ms* Summers, when clearly, it's not? Is she like, related to Jordan Catalano maybe?

Forgetting all about his bag, Brian walks out the classroom; his mind occupied with the recently discovered mystery.

**[Next morning, Chase's house]**

"So, Rickie, when will you be leaving us to move into the Pride House?" Sipping his coffee, Graham eyes the boy.

"Well, there's still like, this little problem, you see. They ask for a small amount of money every month, for like, food, and rent, you know? And honestly, I'm not sure like, where to get that kind of cash."

"I see… Well, you might be in luck… Hallie and I discussed this, and we've actually got a job-opening at the restaurant. We need someone to help us out during the rush hours. And you know, I heard it helps if you know the owners." Graham winks at Rickie. "You really proved to be a great help at the opening night, so I'd apply for the job if I were you…"

"Oh, Mr Chase, I couldn't accept that, really. You and Mrs Chase have given me like, so much already!"

"Nonsense, Rickie! You'd be doing us a big favour; we could really use a pair of extra hands. We'd pay you too, of course. Look, why don't you just give it a try, okay?"

"Well, if you're like, sure about it, I'd love to try it out! I don't know how to thank you, Mr C; you're a life-saver!"

"The pleasure's all mine, Rickie, don't worry. Hallie's running around the restaurant like crazy, it would be so great if you could lighten her burdens." Graham pauses for a brief moment. "So, when did you say you wanted to move into the Pride House?"

"As soon as I come up with the money, I guess. I was hoping like, this weekend. And I hate to ask for another favour, but I was hoping you guys could like, help me, you know, by driving my stuff over there."

"Of course we will help you, Rickie! I mean, it's not that we want to get you out of our way or anything, but, well, you know what I mean, we'll help you." Patty places her hand over Rickie's.

"Yeah, thanks, Mr and Mrs C, for you know, like, everything."

**[Outside school]**

"Hey Chase, got a minute?" Hastily throwing his bicycle into the bicycle-rack, Brian runs up to Angela.

Without saying a word, Angela eyes Brian briefly and keeps on walking to the main-entrance.

"It's like, important, I wouldn't talk to you otherwise, believe me…" It's hard for Brian to look at Angela without seeing the pictures he took of her and Jordan.

"What is it, Krakow?" Stopping dead, Angela reluctantly gives Brian her attention.

"I umm, like, found out something… I mean, what if someone isn't like, who she says she is, but she's really… I mean, Jordan, has he like, ever mentioned a relative who um, teaches?"

"You're talking in riddles, and I don't see why Jordan's family is any of your business."

"I know, it's not, but I think it could be like, yours. You see, Ms Summers, she…"

"What do you know about Ms Summers and Jordan? Did you like, catch them at something illegal?" Worried that Brian stumbled upon something he shouldn't have, Angela fears the worst.

"No, no, I didn't catch them at…" Brian looks at her puzzled, what on earth is she referring to?

"Then what, Krakow? Please, get to the point, will you?"

"Okay, okay, remember, when Ms Summers interrupted Mrs Lerner just before she was going to say like, her married name? Telling her, she didn't go by that name anymore?"

"Yeah, I guess. So, she got a divorce, I still don't understand what that's got to do with Jordan."

"She's um, look, I don't know what it like, means, but I saw like, these letters lying on Ms Summers' desk, only they were like, addressed to a Mrs Catalano."

Angela's eyes lose their focus, her mind wandering on the consequences of Brian's words. Various facial expressions battle for space on her face; confusion is being replaced by self-loathing before her face gets an almost neutral expression once again.

"Angela? You okay?" Hesitant, Brian stretches out his fingers to poke Angela's shoulder.

"Yeah, I'm fine. So, you're like, absolutely *sure* that her name is Catalano?"

"Positive."

"I'm not sure what to say. God, I was like, thinking she was coming on to him, but--."

Closing her mouth before she fills Brian in on Jordan's past, Angela's mind is working overtime. Ms Summers' real name being the same as Jordan's could be a total coincidence, and the only reason she's not using it, is because she's divorced. But, she could also be a relative of Jordan's. She could be like an aunt, or a niece, or a cousin. She could even be like, his *mother*. Wow. No, that can't be right. Why would his mother leave him and then come back when he's like, an adult? That's not what mothers are supposed to do.

"You thought *what*?" Brian makes a disgusted face; Angela thought Ms Summers and Jordan were like…?!

"Look, Brian, don't tell anyone what you found out yet, you know."

"Yeah, I know."

"But I'm glad you told me, thanks."

Smiling, Brian stays by Angela's side all the way up to school. Finally, he told her something worth telling. She spoke to him again, and treated him like an actual person. Nothing can ruin his day anymore.

**[Girls' restroom]**

"Holy crap…" Holding up a piece of paper, Rayanne comes storming into the bathroom.

"What's that, another list of girls?" Quickly, Sharon grabs the piece of paper from Rayanne's hand.

Reaching into her bag, Rayanne pulls out her flask and pours some of its content down her throat, taking the edge off life. Getting hold of Sharon's shoulder for support; Rayanne's eyes pair up with Sharon's, who seemingly is studying the picture.

On the black and white picture of Angela and Jordan making out, Angela's head is tilted back while Jordan's lips are pressed against her neck. If it weren't for Jordan's head blocking the view, you would be able to see Angela's naked upper body, no doubt about it. The picture is extremely hot and steamy.

Underneath there's written: _'The subject Jordan Catalano doesn't need to be tutored in…'_

"Poor Angela… This is like, worst than that time when they spread that rumour on her and Jordan. God, this is like, even worst than getting caught with that sex-tape."

"Oh come on, this is like, a brilliant picture! You know, it could even be like, the start of a whole new career!" Waving the piece of paper in the air, Rayanne can't stop smirking.

_Rayanne VO: "I know I'm like, supposed to feel sorry for Angela, that these flyers with these like, freaking sexy pictures of her and Jordan are like, all over school, but you know, who cares? Having sex isn't like something she should be embarrassed about, you know? She's like, kinda stuck-up sometimes; she needs to like, I dunno, loosen up, or she'll turn into Patty. Ugh."_

"So, who like, took the picture? Did Brian Krakow like, do it?" Sharon's eyes stay glued to the piece of paper.

"I guess… It's not like I know that many photographers at school who like, suffer from an Angela-obsession, do you?"

"No, I don't know any other photographers. But when did he like, you know, take it? He's not like, spying on them is he? And why would he take a picture of them, you know, making out?"

"Dunno, don't care. I can't like, make up my mind yet, you know? Is it like, really kinky, or is it just like, perverted?"

_Rayanne VO: "Taking pictures like this, means you're like, really, um, what's the word I'm going for here? Obsessed? Driven? Pathetic and lonely? Suicidal even__, maybe? I guess Krakow's like, all of these things. He's like, weird, you know, living life through the lens of a camera. But hey, I'm like, living life looking through the bottom of a bottle, so I'm not like, judging him. No, I hate to admit it, but I'm even like, turned on by this side of him. Who knew he was like, such a thrill seeker; trying to capture his fantasies or maybe like, the dark side of life, on film? We're not that different I guess. Living on the light side of life *sucks*." _

"I think it's disgusting, you don't like, take pictures of people when they're like, making out. It's pathetic he just keeps following Angela around and like, catches every move she makes on film. He's like, her personal stalker or something, it's like, so sad."

_Rayanne VO: "Cherski's got a point. It'__s like, sad, he's still following Angela around. I shouldn't give him the satisfaction of like, being with me when he like, wants to be with *her* anyway. I'm like, the big loser in this picture, I guess. But, he came down there because *I* asked him to, so…"_

"Maybe he just happened to be there, who knows…"

"Brian? Yeah, he's surely got a talent for finding out the wrong things, like, all the time."

"About that talent… Those forms, you know, they weren't like, Angela's, were they?"

"What forms are you talking about?"

"You know; the abortion papers. I saw them too, you know."

"Why do you always have to know like, everything?"

_Rayanne VO: "I have like, this reputation to uphold, you know? It's kinda hard, always knowing everything about everyone, but people are like, expecting me to do it, so. It's just who I'm supposed to be, and it like, keeps me from thinking __about who I like, *really* wanna be, so, whatever."_

"I make it like, my business to know, if it's worth knowing of course. I mean, a girl's gotta do, what a girl's gotta do to survive, right?"

"They were mine okay, you happy now?"

_Rayanne VO: "I used to think Cherski was like, this really good girl, until that poem she wrote like, proved the opposite. Cherski was having sex and she wrote a damn __hot poem about it! Then she turned out to be even more like, not-flawless, when the abortion-forms showed up. Who knew good girls like, get in trouble as well?"_

"So you're…" Rayanne slaps her hand over her mouth; her eyes grow big with disbelief.

"No, I'm not, I mean, I wasn't. I got my period in time. But don't tell anyone, Kyle doesn't know, okay?"

"I won't tell, besides, there are like, thousands of erotic pictures of Angela and Jordan spread around school, so I've got like, something else on my mind."

"Poor Angela, she'll never go to school again…"

**[School hallways]**

Walking through the school hallways with big paces, Angela holds a piece of paper clutched in her hands. Every step she makes, her feet seem to trample on another piece of paper, displaying the same black and white pictures of Jordan and her. Ignoring the students' eyes directed at her and the giggles whenever she walks by, she moves straight to her target, Brian Krakow.

"What's this?" Crumpling up the piece of paper in her hand, Angela's eyes spark with fury.

"I um, I…"

"Did you do this?"

"No, no, I mean, yeah, I like, took the pictures, but I didn't… I'm just as surprised as you are, trust me!"

"Oh, I'm sure you are. You took the pictures and they like, magically, appeared all over school!"

"Chase, listen, I took the pictures, okay? And I'm really sorry about it, but I had them like, in my bag, at all times. And then, yesterday, after Ms Summers' class, I like, forgot my bag. Someone must have taken the pictures out and, you know…"

"Why should I like, believe you? When Jordan caught you in the boiler room you *denied* taking any pictures. But, obviously, you did, so, were you like, following me?"

"No, I wasn't following you, believe me. I left my camera down there, and I didn't want to get it because I knew you and Jordan were there, but it was like, too expensive to leave it there. And then I saw you and Jordan and you looked so…"

"You were spying on us, Brian! You had no right to do that! Now look what happened!"

"Look, I'm like, really sorry, you know? I never meant to…" Why did he take those pictures anyway? Just before school, when he told her about Mrs Catalano, Angela seemed to be letting him nearer again. But now, he pushed her away again by invading her privacy.

"Never meant to what, Krakow? Never meant to invade my privacy? Never meant to lie to me? Never meant to embarrass me in front of the whole school? Well, you did. God, I even had to come to the principal's office to explain this!"

"I don't know who did this, but I *swear* it wasn't me! Why would I like, *do* such a thing?"

"Why would you take the pictures to begin with, Krakow? Your mind apparently works in mysterious ways. Maybe you're just jealous of us, I dunno! Anyway, I told the principal I knew who took the pictures, so be prepared."

Disappointed, Angela walks away from Brian. Her rage subsides and embarrassment takes over. Trying to ignore the cheering, whistling and obscene gesturing that surround her; she quickly walks over to the girls' bathroom to hide away for the rest of her life.

A voice over the intercom, ringing through the school halls; summons Brian Krakow to the principal's office at once. Leaving him no time to feel ashamed and embarrassed, Brian bolts away.

**[Girls' restroom]**

The sobs coming from the last stall, tell Rickie that Angela is in there. "Angela?"

Receiving no answer, Rickie walks over to the door of the last stall and gently knocks upon it. "Angela, come out, please. Jordan is waiting for you, outside the bathroom."

"If he wants to see me he can look at one of the gazillion pictures scattered all over school."

"Come on, you can't stay in here like, for the rest of your life? You can't let other people like, take over your life, remember? Face your demons!"

Softly, the door swings open, revealing Angela leaning against the wall.

"Come on…" Getting hold of her hand, Rickie pulls Angela from the stall. "Besides, you've got like, nothing to be ashamed of! Look how gorgeous you two look! I'm gonna frame this picture and like, hang it on my new wall!"

Laughing quietly through her tears, Angela falls into Rickie's arms for an embrace. "Thanks, Rickie."

"Now go and talk to your partner in sex-crimes."

**[School hallways]**

"Hey, so, I guess you like, um, saw the pictures you know, of you and me?" Tucking his hands in his pockets, Jordan gives Angela a shy smile. Standing amidst a paper-covered floor, he shuffles his feet.

"Duh…" Taking in the environment, Angela can't escape reality. Everywhere she looks, the pictures stare back at her; on the floor, on the walls and even on some lockers.

"Yeah, you know, Shane and the guys like, saw them too."

"Yeah, they're like, not that hard to miss, I guess."

"Yeah, I guess. So now they're, you know, asking me where to like, sign up for tutoring and stuff."

Angela smirks a little. "God, how old are they?"

"Yeah, I told them, you know, it's like, none of their business."

"You should have told them that Krakow would be happy to teach them."

"Yeah, I'll tell 'em that." Jordan grins before he continues seriously. "So, did Brain like, do this?"

"I already asked him and he admitted to having taken the pictures, but he *swears* he didn't copy them."

"So, he took the pictures? Like, that time in the boiler room?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"So, can you like, give me a reason I shouldn't, you know, handle him?"

"I can't."

"So, you're saying you like, want me to?"

"I'm not saying that."

"So, what *are* you saying?"

"I'm saying you shouldn't become your father, Jordan." Angela fixes her eyes onto Jordan's.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. I mean, I was just like, asking, you know."

"I know, and I know you're not really the violent type, so."

"No, I'm not. I hate it, but I guess that's like, logical."

"Yeah, that really makes sense. I'm glad you've learned from your dad's mistakes." Angela's hands seek out Jordan's. "Besides, most people *know* who took the pictures and they're like, eyeing him like he's some kind of freak, you know? That's gotta be like, punishment enough, I guess. Oh, and I told the principal he took the pictures. They just summoned for him, so he's not done yet, I guess."

"Yeah, I guess. And I think he like, is. Freaky, I mean."

"Yeah well, he's sorry, you know. He's just, Brian Krakow I guess." For a brief moment, Angela pauses. "He um, told me something this morning, you know, before all this happened…"

"Yeah? Like, what?"

"He um, he read an envelope addressed to Ms Summers on her desk. Funny thing is, it wasn't like, *her* name that was written on it."

"Oh." Jordan's not that interested in hearing another thing that Brain found out, especially after what he did to them.

"I'm not sure how to tell you this Jordan. It could mean nothing, but it could mean like, something big, I guess."

"So?"

"Her name, Ms Summers' name, it's um… it's Mrs Catalano…" Trying to read his facial expression, Angela locks her eyes onto Jordan's.

"Ha, just like mine, you mean. What a fluke."

"Is it just a fluke? Or is she like, related to you maybe?"

Never even realising that this woman could be related to him, Jordan wonders who she could be. His father keeps to himself mostly, so he doesn't know that many relatives. Maybe she's like an aunt, or a cousin. He's got like, tutoring later anyway, so that's a good chance to ask her. "I'll ask her later this afternoon."

"What? No, I um, I didn't mean you should ask her like, right away. She's keeping it hidden for a reason, I guess."

"So? Maybe we're like, not related anyway. But, I don't know that much family, so I guess it's nice if she really *is* related, you know?"

"Jordan, have you ever considered the possibility that she could um, she could be like…" Wondering whether Jordan is really that dim-witted, or just disinterested; Angela hesitates to spell it out for him. She could be wrong, she's just guessing after all.

"Oh, you're thinking, she um, she could be like, my mom?" The thought actually crossed Jordan's mind before, but he dismissed as being unrealistic. "That's like, funny." Jordan smirks.

"Why?" Relieved that Jordan figured it out on his own, Angela *is* surprised by his response.

"Dunno, 'cause it's like, not possible."

Flabbergasted, Angela falls silent. She has been worrying for nothing, seeing how easy Jordan deals with this knowledge. "Why not?"

"Just 'cause. She left me, so why would she like, come back for me now?"

"Dunno, just… You know."

Someone whistling at them, reminds Angela of the pictures again. "Oh, um, so… Did your friends, you know, say anything about me?" Curiosity takes over, surely Jordan's friends mentioned Angela's provocative pose?

Again, Jordan grins. "Yeah, they um, did… but I'm not telling you."

"Oh come on! Can't I like, *enjoy* my fifteen minutes of fame a little, instead of just being ashamed?"

Locking his eyes onto hers, Jordan smiles while telling her, "Well, they um, they finally get me, I guess."

**[After school, Pride House]**

"Are you sure you want like, all the walls, to be painted *red*?" Staring at the paint-brush in her hand, Angela is afraid to apply the colour to the wall.

"No, just those three. This one, will be, like, black." Rickie points at the wall opposite the window.

_Rayanne VO: "It's like, so depressing, sitting here, and listening to them talk about__ colours and the pride House and Mr K like, all the time. It's almost like, there's nothing else in the world worth talking about. Meanwhile, the walls of this place are like, trying to squeeze the life out of me. And their words, they're like, these little piranha's trying to chew me alive. I need another drink to keep me from going completely insane."_

"Isn't, like, pink, the colour for the gay community?" Sitting in the window ledge, Rayanne stares outside, sipping from her flask. "God, this place feels like a prison. I feel trapped already!"

Ignoring Rayanne, Rickie eyes Angela. "It's like, so weird, you know, I finally got like, this great new home, but I'm not, you know, happy. I'd rather live with Mr Katimski, I guess."

"I know, Rickie. It's not fair, you finally found someone to look after you, and then he…"

Angela swallows away the rest of the sentence, there's no point in stating the obvious.

"He's really like, a great guy, you know? I still can't believe he'll never wake up again."

"Yeah, I know, me neither. Just keep hoping Rickie, don't give up on him. Not yet anyway."

"Yeah, I keep hoping, but it's like, the more time passes, the smaller my hope gets. You know, Angela, you really should consider yourself lucky, you know, having two parents at home, who like, care for you, and worry about you and stuff."

"Yeah, well, they care so much they're like, smothering me, especially my mom. I can't even like, develop my own personality, you know? I should be allowed to make my own mistakes and stuff!"

_Rayanne VO: "I'm all for Angela like, loosening up and defying Pattycake, but she's like__, still grounded for staying away the whole night. So we can't like, hang out and stuff, and it sucks, you know?" _

Rayanne cocks her eyebrow at Angela. "Hey, you're like, still doing time for the last mistake you made, remember?"

"So? It's not like, I'm *you* or anything; making mistakes and lying about them..."

"What's that like, supposed to mean?"

"Oh, you know, having sex with boys who happen to like me… Like Jordan… And Bri-"

"Look, I thought we were passed all that crap, Angelica?! I thought we were like, friends again, you know? Maybe I thought wrong, I dunno."

"Yeah, so did I, but don't friends like, tell each other everything?"

"Like, what didn't I tell you?"

"Like, you and Brian!"

"Rayanne and Brian?" Rickie's face looks like he just took a bite from something unimaginable gross.

"Me and Brian? What about me and Brian?" A blush creeps up Rayanne's cheeks.

"Danielle caught you kissing him, the night of the restaurant opening!"

"What? Jeez, you think I would like, voluntarily, kiss Brian Krakow?!"

"No, of course I don't think that, but why would Danielle lie to me?"

"I dunno, ask her! Maybe she's like, jealous, how would I know?!"

"She likes him, so maybe she did make it up. Are you *sure* there's like, nothing going on between you and Krakow?"

"I'm like, sure. I know I'm not that picky, but I do have *some* taste in men, ugh, please."

"Okay, as long as you're sure, I'll believe you."

"You better like, believe me, damn right…"

_Rayanne VO: "Okay, so maybe I'm lying __like, a little, but who cares? There's really like, nothing going on with me and Krakow, okay, we play a little now and then, but I don't want everyone to know. I mean, he *is* Brian Krakow. And why should Angela like, care? She's with Jordan, so." _

"Guys? As long as we're like, already talking about the obnoxious Brian Krakow, he um, found out something, about Ms Summers." Angela lowers herself onto the bed.

_Rayanne VO: "Finally, some action! Never a dull moment when Krakow stick his nose in someone else's business, I gotta hand him that much!"_

"What? She's got like, a police record, for having nasty sex with some of her students?" Jumping down from the window-ledge, Rayanne pins the black and white photo of Jordan and Angela to the wall.

"No, no, it's about her name. Ms Summers isn't like, her real name…" Angela pauses before she continues, "Mrs Catalano is…"

"Catalano? As in, Jordan Catalano?" Sitting down on the bed next to Angela, Rickie leans in closer to her.

"Now I get it, they're like, married!" Rayanne picks up the red paint-brush and draws a big heart on one of the white walls, with the letters 'JC' and 'Mrs C' beside it.

"What? Don't say something disgusting like that! No, it means she could be like, related to him, you know. Maybe she's like, an aunt, or cousin. Or maybe they're not related at all, that's possible too. But all I could think about was that she may be like, his mother, you know? When I told Jordan he didn't seem worried about it, it was like, so weird, seeing him react so calm."

Pausing for a moment, Angela looks at Rickie and Rayanne before she continues, "There's a little voice in my head that keeps telling me that she *is* Jordan's mom, and she's like, come back for him, or something…"

_Rayanne VO: "Catalano's mother__ came back for him? No, when parents leave, they like, don't come back, ever. They write you the occasional card, and even send you some money, but they don't come back. They like, can't. It's like, impossible! Fairytales aren't real; it's time Angela realises that."_

**[After school, Ms Summers' classroom]**

Shifting in his seat, Jordan's eyes meet Ms Summers'. He's wondering if it's okay to ask her about her real name, but he's too curious to keep his mouth shut. "So, um, my um girlfriend, she like, told me something about you."

"Is she your girlfriend?" Holding up the black and white picture, Ms Summers points at the image of Angela.

"Yeah, she is, I guess."

"Nice picture, bit on the dirty side though. I understand the person responsible for this has been detained and is getting rid of the papers as we speak. Confrontation and undoing what you did serve as a good punishment in my opinion."

"Oh, okay, I'm glad he's like, getting rid of the pictures, you know."

"I'm sure you are; it's got to be embarrassing to see yourself through the entire school, in this awkward pose."

"Yeah, it's kinda humiliating, you know?"

"I can connect to that. So, what did your girlfriend tell you then?"

"She told me um, your real last name, is like, the same as um, mine."

"Oh? How did she find out?" Ms Summers starts fiddling with her rings.

She wanted to spend more time with Jordan before she told him who she really is. What does she tell him now? The truth?

"She um, she heard it from this guy. He saw some letters on your desk."

Damn nosy kids, she should have known better than to leave her mail lying around. There's no point in denying; lying to Jordan won't make things better at all. "I see. Well, it's correct, or was correct, should I say. I was married to a man named Catalano once."

"So, you're like, family, or something? 'Cause um, I don't know many relatives."

"You could say that I am family, I guess."

"Like, how?"

Ms Summers falls silent for a moment before she speaks softly. "I'm your mother, Jordan."

She couldn't hold her silence any longer; Jordan kept asking her for the truth, so she gave him the truth. Watching him closely, she wonders how he will handle the bomb she just dropped on him.

Jordan's lips try to speak, but no sound comes out. The words Ms Summers tell him don't make sense; Jordan hears them, but he can't believe them. His mother left him, why would she come back? She must be lying; this must be like, a really sick joke, or something.

"Yeah, right…" Jordan laughs sarcastically.

"It's true, I am."

"Yeah, I um, I heard you; but you're kidding, right?" Fearing her answer, Jordan fixes his eyes onto Ms Summers.

"I'm not kidding; it's hardly something to kid about, is it?"

"I guess not, no. But um, I…"

Getting up, Jordan acts upon the need he feels to leave the classroom. He's confused, she *can't* be his mother, she just can't. So who is she and why is she pulling his leg?

"Jordan? Where are you going?"

"I um, I'm leaving, I guess. I'm like, confused."

"Please, stay, we'll talk this over, okay?"

"I don't know if I can. I still don't believe you, you know?"

"Please Jordan, believe me. Wait, I've got something…"

While rummaging through her bag in search for her purse; her voice starves out. Trembling fingers take out a faded picture of a little, blond haired boy. Showing Jordan the picture; his big blue eyes meet their youthful equivalent.

"Hey, I know this picture…" Unlocking his eyes from the photograph, Jordan eyes Ms Summers. The little boy in the picture is *him*, he's seen it before.

"This is the last picture I ever had of you." A sad expression settles upon her face.

Not able to move another muscle, Jordan's eyes move from the picture to Ms Summers, over and over again. She has to be telling the truth, how else would she have gotten this picture of him? Even more confused than before, Jordan lowers himself onto his seat once more.

"So, if you're like, really my mother… Why did you leave me?" Afraid of the things he might hear, he feels the urge to flee again. The feelings are overwhelming him; he hasn't been in this much agony since the time he tried to patch things up with Angela.

"I didn't leave you, Jordan."

"You didn't?" Jordan flicks his hair behind his ears.

"Your dad and I, we didn't get along that well anymore. He used to drink a lot, and when he did, he'd get violent on me. I was afraid it was only a matter of time before he would harm you as well, so I wanted to get a divorce from him. He told me that if I would divorce him, I'd never see you again.

"So, one night, I fled the house and took you with me; you were probably too small to remember that. Unfortunately, your father found me the next day and he threatened me to stay away. He told me that if I ever tried to get near you again, he'd kill you. And I believed him, he had a really bad temper, you know."

She continues, "That doesn't mean I didn't try to find you, but he kept moving around the country, making it impossible for me to keep up with you. I didn't have the means to send a Private Investigator after you, because I was still studying. Once I had my degree and a steady income, I saved up all the money I could, to try and find you again. I don't know if your father got tired of running, but I found you at last because he hasn't moved around for quite some time now.

"I decided to take a job at the school where you were registered to slowly get to know you, before I would scare you off by telling you I was your long-lost-mother. But then someone found out my real name and I had to speed things up a little."

Silence is filling up the classroom. Knowing his father, the story makes sense to Jordan. All his life, he was raised to believe his mother abandoned him, because she didn't *want* him. The woman sitting in front of him; claims the opposite. Her big blue eyes are just like his, come to think of it. It's like looking into a mirror, sending shivers down his spine.

"Jordan? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm okay. I don't know like, what to say, you know?"

"Take all the time you need. I understand this is too much for you all at once. I had the benefit here, because I already *knew* you are my son. I don't want to pressure you into anything, but I would love to be part of your life again; if you can forgive me for all the years I've missed out on, to my regret of course."

Jordan doesn't know what to do, should he confront his father about the truth? Can he trust her? What's like, the normal thing to do in a situation like this?

"And please, when we're alone, you can call me Sarah. Or mom…" Ms Summers giggles.

"Oh, okay, I will, I guess… Just, not now."

"That's fine; as I said before, take your time. We can take things slow, you know?"

"Yeah, slow, that's like, okay, I guess." Suddenly Jordan remembers Angela telling him the exact same thing. It didn't take long before they sped things up anyway, but luckily that turned out for the best.

Out of the blue, Jordan thinks of a quality he absolutely doesn't share with his so-called mother. "You know, it's like, ironic…"

"What is?"

"Well, there's like, a term for me. I'm a rudimentary reader with low literacy skills. And you're like, an English teacher…"

**[Supper time, Brian Krakow's house]**

Heating up his dinner in the microwave, the ringing doorbell takes Brian by surprise. His parents just went out, but surely they have their keys with them. Opening the door, he finds Rayanne standing on the porch. "Oh, it's you."

"Yeah, it's me. Who did you expect, like, Angela?" Smirking, Rayanne walks through the hallways into the kitchen. "What's that smell, Krakow?"

"I was heating up the dinner my parents left me."

Before Brian has a chance to ask her anything, Rayanne has opened up the microwave and taken out the plate. After searching the drawers for cutlery, she takes a seat at the table and hungrily devours the meal.

"Hey, Graff, you want some of my dinner? Oh wait, you've helped yourself already. You're like, in luck there's another portion left!"

"Oh no, one portion will be like, fine!" Rayanne talks with her mouth full.

Sticking his head in the fridge, Brian comes out holding another portion of food to heat up. After heating it up, he takes his plate and takes a seat next to Rayanne. "So, why are you like, here anyway? Save for eating my food, obviously."

_Rayanne VO: "__'Why am I here?' Don't you get it, you idiot! He's like, so clueless, I'm not sure it's adorable or pathetic. Since I don't do adorable, I'm settling for pathetic."_

"Let me finish first, then we'll talk." Rayanne continues eating.

_Rayanne VO: "It's not__ like I never tasted anything this good, it's just, you know, home-cooked meals are so normal to so many people, but not to me. Amber's cooking skills don't stretch beyond blending some tropical looking cocktails. Wow, that and the lollipops, that already makes like, two food-groups!"_

After her last bite, Rayanne shoves the plate away and watches Brian finish his meal. "I enjoyed the picture you like, spread around school today, Krakow! There's an unexpected side to you…"

"I just *shot* it by accident, I didn't mean for the whole school to see it, or anything."

"By accident? You like, accidentally stumbled upon Catalano and Angelica making out? Yeah, right. Hey, unlike the rest of the world, I'm not judging you, you know? So, can you like, take pictures of me, looking like that?"

Spitting out the food in his mouth, Brian eyes Rayanne. "Looking like what exactly?"

"Dunno, erotic, I guess…"

"What is it exactly you want from me, Graff? You… you… you're like, messing with me, aren't you? You do stuff to me, but you push me away at the same time. I don't get you!"

_Rayanne VO: "__I *always* keep my feelings out of it; I don't get like, emotionally attached. That's why -normally- I screw 'em and dump 'em; hey, they could be like, screwing me over instead, but whatever, It's not like I give a crap. Anyway, before things have a chance to get like, more intense, I'm like, outta there! But I'm having trouble staying away from Krakow, I feel like a bloody whore who wants more. _

_The only thing I'm like, really committed to in my life, is my flask. Up until now it __was the only thing I needed to survive, you know? It's like; Krakow's turned himself into this highly addicting drink or something, making me crave for more. But I'm not like, telling him that, no way! Keepin' it cool, you know?"_

"There's like, nothing to get. Just go with the flow, Krakow. Don't think. So, how about it? Got a studio here in the house?"

"Look, I'm not sure what you have in mind, but my equipment is like, upstairs."

"Oh, your equipment… Well, let's go upstairs then!"

Getting up from the table, Rayanne walks up the stairs. Unsure what to do, Brian lingers at the bottom of the stairs. When she disappears from sight, Brian decides to go up after her.

"So, is this like, your bedroom, Krakow? Oh, don't tell me, you're spying on Angela with this thingy up here…" Rayanne's fingers glide over the camera installed nearby Brian's window.

_Rayanne VO: "Krakow's bedroom is kinda like I pictured it. Crap, yeah, I pictured his bedroom; I stooped to the lowest levels, ugh. __Anyway, it's like, everything I expected, nothing exciting or anything, just neat and boyish and you know, average. God; why am I like, here again? I need a drink!"_

"Please, don't touch that, it's very sensitive equipment."

"Really… So, where should I sit? Right here, on the bed?" Plopping down on Brian's bed, Rayanne sends Brian a sultry stare. "So, is your sensitive equipment like, ready for me?"

While Rayanne crawls towards him on her knees, Brian hastens to get the camera from the window ledge, almost tripping over his own feet. He's not sure what Rayanne's up to, but he might as well enjoy it while it lasts.

"Whatever you do, don't stop clicking, okay?" Slowly, Rayanne unbuttons her blouse, her fingers hesitating at times, slipping every button out of its hole carefully.

_Rayanne VO: "I almost never feel insecure __like, around boys or men, because I'm not used to being rejected. Maybe it's because most of the time I'm like, totally wasted anyway and don't know what the hell I'm doing and who I'm doing it to, I guess. But fuck it, I feel nervous now! Even pouring down the medicine my dear, beloved flask held for me, doesn't like, take the edge of it. What if he suddenly realises I'm like, *not* Angela, then what?"_

Through the lens of his camera, Brian's eyes follow her movements. Her hands slide her blouse down from her shoulders, revealing a purple, lace bra. Trying to keep his head cool, Brian registers her beauty and boldness by clicking the camera. Her hands brush over her breasts lightly; her right hand traces further down over her belly. When her hand disappears from sight behind Rayanne's skirt, Brian catches his breath. Her fingers are touching herself *there*, barely visible to him; but the knowledge is enough to set his insides on fire. A burning sensation flowing through his vanes numbs his entire body.

Lowering the camera; Brian's throat feels dry as he speaks. "I can't… You like, really expect me to…?"

"Whatever… How about putting the camera on that stick-thingy and helping a girl out here, Krakow?"

_Rayanne VO: __"God, it's not even like I'm attracted to him or anything, or am I? I mean, looking at him when I'm sober, makes me wanna *puke*, you know? He makes me nauseous, and he like, confuses me with these unknown feelings that tie my stomach in this freaking obnoxious knot. At least when I'm like, wasted, I can blame the alcohol for wanting him. Alcohol makes me like; wanna hump almost everything in sight. Yup, I hate admitting it, but it's like, the truth." _

Faster than he's ever been, Brian sets up the camera on a tripod, adjusting it to its repeated self-timer-setting. Insecurely, he walks over to Rayanne. Her arm stretches out to embrace him, pulling him on top of her. Her lips crash into his in a hungry kiss, while the camera clicks away.

**[Supper time, at the restaurant]**

"Mom, please, can I go to Ryan's party this weekend? Please, please, please?" Getting up from the table, Danielle smothers her mother in hugs and kisses.

"You're still grounded, you know that! And I thought you and Ryan were 'taking things slow'?"

"We are, but it's just like, a party, you know, it's not like I'm spending the night or anything!"

"Danielle! Trying to make your sister look bad isn't helping you to look good, young lady! Besides, you may not have been with a boy that night, but you still stayed out without our permission!"

"But mom, please? All the kids in my class are going, I can't miss this! I'll do extra chores if you want me to, just, please, let me go!"

"I'll think about it, okay? Hey, isn't that Jordan Catalano?"

"Huh?"

Quickly, Angela gets up and walks to the door where her mother just spotted Jordan. "What are you doing here? I mean, not that I don't like it, it's just…"

"Can I like, talk to you?" Jordan licks his lips.

"Sure!"

Looking around, Angela finds an empty table where they sit down. Shifting in his seat, Jordan's eyes avoid Angela's.

"Jordan? What's up?"

Locking his eyes onto Angela's, Jordan blurts out abruptly, "She's my mom."

"She's your mom? Who is?" Confused, Angela stares at Jordan when it hits her: Ms Summers is his mom. Turning white with shock, Angela's brain doesn't work and her lips can't move anymore. God, he must be like, *shocked*. "For real?"

"I guess so, I mean, she had this picture of me when I was like, little. But I still can't believe it. It's like, she could be *anyone*, you know?"

"Yeah, I know. God, I'm sorry, but I still don't know what to say."

"Yeah, well, me too." Jordan's fingertips trace imaginary circles over the tablecloth until Angela takes hold of his hand.

"You okay?"

"I guess… I'm like, confused. Should I um, talk to my dad? Can I really trust her?"

"I don't know; I can't even imagine what it's like, you know?"

"Yeah, I know."

"So, what did she say to you?"

"She um, she told me her side of the story, and it like, makes sense, you know? My dad, he like, threatened to harm me, if she looked me up. And we like, used to move around all the time. Now I know it wasn't because of his job; it was to keep her from um, finding me."

"God, no offence, but I already thought your father was a bastard before I even heard *her* side of the story!"

"Yeah, she could be, like, my ticket out of there, you know?"

"Would you like, want that… I mean, if she's really your mom, would you go and live with her?"

"Yeah, I mean, anything's better than living with my dad, I guess…"

"Yeah, I guess… Just, you know, be careful. I mean, you don't really know her."

"I know. But I want to, you know?"

"Yeah, I understand. It's only natural, and she does seem like, nice and all."

"I guess she does. It'd be like, nice to have someone around who cares for me."

Angela gives Jordan an undignified look and withdraws her hand from his rapidly. His eyes meet hers and he hastens to say, "Besides you, I mean." Baring his teeth, he grins at her.

"Oh, that was *just* in time, or you would have had to go to bed without supper, Mister!" Angela imitates a mother punishing her child.

"Hmm, supper sounds good."

"You didn't eat yet? Well, you're in luck; your girlfriend's dad happens to own a restaurant, so."

"That's not like, a fluke, you know?"

Both laughing, they get up to walk over to the table where Patty and Danielle are still sitting.

"Hey Jordan, how are you?" Patty greets him.

"Okay, thanks. Just, you know… hungry."

"Oh, well, in that case; care to join us for dinner?"

"Yeah, thanks, Mrs C." Jordan takes a seat at the table, next to Angela.

"So, Jordan, what's up?"

"Can I like, ask your advice, on something, maybe?" Jordan has little trouble entrusting Patty with his problems, thinking back to the conversation they once had in the kitchen. Besides, Angela told him she's like, adopted; so she'll probably get what he's going through.

"Why of course, Jordan, any time."

"You see, I um, well, I never really knew my mother and now she's like, back. Or I think she is. I'm like, confused and not sure what to do, you know?"

"Oh I see, well…" Taken by surprise by Jordan's honesty, Patty also wonders why Angela never told her about Jordan's mom.

"Aren't there like, these tests, you can do, to see if someone's your mother?" Angela asks; suppressing the words '_Because I would like you to take one'; _since they seem rather inappropriate in this situation.

"Well, it would be much simpler if she had a birth certificate of you, Jordan. And I'm pretty sure your father will be able to identify her, if that's what you're worried about. But if she really *is* your mom, don't let the chance to get to know her pass you by. I don't know what happened or what she did to you, but hear her out and give her a chance to explain. Denying a parent their child or denying a child either or both of its parents, is unforgivable and extremely regrettable."

"Yeah, I guess my dad will like, recognize her. But I do wanna know her, so don't worry."

"Take them somewhere on neutral territory to meet though, that way they won't make a big scene."

"Okay, I will. So, what does like, neutral territory mean then?"

"It's a public place, like a restaurant, or something."

"Oh, like, this place, you mean?"

"Like this place, for example, yes."

"So, is it like, okay? If I bring them here, I mean?"

Feeling flattered that Jordan trusts her enough to ask her advice; Patty never meant to get caught in the middle though. But she's not going to stand in the way of that boy's happiness either. She would have given anything to have met her birth mother, so she relates to him fully.

"We'd be honoured, Jordan."

**To be continued…**


	13. Episode 32: My So Called Sweet Sixteen

_A/N: Unbeta'd again, someday I'll replace it..._

***********************************

_Angela VO: "Jordan Catalano has decided to give Ms Summers the chance to prove she's his mom. There's really no reason to believe she's not, I guess. They've been spending some time together already and Jordan radiates pure happiness ever since. As much as I'm into the mysterious, tormented side of Jordan Catalano, seeing him this happy is like having a whole new Jordan__, someone to love even more." _

"_Tonight Jordan's parents will meet at my dad's restaurant. I think they should talk things over as a family, so I won't be there."_

**[At the restaurant]**

Fiddling with her rings, Ms Summers sits at one of the tables. When the door opens and Jordan walks in, she livens up. The smile that appears on her face; gets replaced by a grim expression the second she lays her eyes upon the man coming in after Jordan.

"Hey," smiling shyly, Jordan takes a seat at the table, opposite his mother.

"Hey, Jordan." Sarah Summers' hand pats Jordan's. "Enzo," she curtly greets Jordan's father.

"Sarah." Jordan's father lowers himself onto a seat, shifting from left to right.

"So, I guess that's like, all the proof I need." Jordan grins, showing his teeth.

Sparks of rage fly from Sarah's eyes to the man who kept her away from her son, for over fifteen years. Her fingernails tap the table and her lips are clenched together tightly, afraid she can't keep her judging words inside. She's an adult and she came here to get her son back, not to blame Enzo for his misbehaviour. She can be civilized about this.

"Um, so, you like, want a drink maybe?" Tucking his hair behind his ear, Jordan dreads the silence between his parents. He's afraid his mother will attack his father, assessing by the looks of her.

"Just gimme a beer." Without blinking, Enzo eyes Sarah.

"I'll have a white wine please." Sarah's face curls up in a smile.

Almost afraid to take his eyes of his parents, Jordan shifts back and forth in his seat, seeking out Rickie. When he sees him beside a nearby table, Jordan calls him over to order them drinks.

"Enzo, surely you understand you can't keep Jordan away from me anymore. He's old enough to decide whom he wants to be with now. God, he's even old enough to live on his own, get married, drive a car and vote, but that's beside the point."

"Whatever, Sarah. You're making me seem like the bad guy here, but I never kept you away from him."

"You *lying* sack of --!" Barely in time Sarah swallows the word and continues at a whispering tone. "You know that's not what happened, you bastard! You never even gave me a chance to keep up with you, moving across the country all the time! You denied me my son, all these years!"

"Hey, you can have him; he's not that useful anyway."

"How can you say that about your own flesh and blood? You heartless son of a --!" Even though she's not taken by surprise, Sarah is still shocked by Enzo's cruel statement and wants to keep Jordan from hearing any more of this conversation. "Jordan, could you please leave us alone to *talk*?"

Still a bit afraid his parents will choke each other to death, Jordan leaves the table anyway. Not sure where to go, he drifts off toward the kitchen, encountering Graham.

"Hey, Jordan, so, how are your parents doing?"

"They're like, in a public place, so they won't actually *kill* each other, right?"

Chuckling, Graham continues seasoning the already beautifully garnished dishes. "I'll make sure they won't, 'cause it would mean the end of my restaurant as well, you know?"

"Yeah, I guess…" Fully aware of his father's bad temper, Jordan has trouble producing a smile. Closing his eyes, he leans against the refrigerator.

**[****School hallways, next morning]**

Making sure no one sees what he's doing; Brian puts away some pictures into his locker. The pictures Rayanne practically forced him to take turned out extraordinary. The ones where you can actually see *him* like, almost entirely naked, disgust him. Staring down his own butt isn't his idea of 'an erotic picture'. And it's like, kinda weird, because, how many people actually have pictures of losing their virginity?

But Rayanne, she's like, something else. The camera loves her, and peeking at her in the pictures makes many feelings rise to the surface. Feelings aren't like, the only things that rise; Brian's pants are growing tight around the crotch area just looking at her sensual poses.

"What's up, Krakow?" Out of nowhere, Rickie approaches Brian.

Feeling caught like a deer in the headlights, Brian stutters, "Oh, um, he-hey, Rickie."

"What's like, up with you? You're acting all jumpy and stuff."

"Nothing, you just startled me, that's like, all. I didn't expect you, I guess." God, he needs to sell someone he's not a virgin anymore. But he can't tell Rickie, heck, he can't tell anyone for that matter. Rayanne will kill him if she finds out.

"Why does everybody like, keep saying that? Am I like, supposed to stay in bed all day, and cry my eyes out? That's not gonna wake him up, you know. Anyway, being here, near my friends, is like, the best thing to take my mind off it, I guess."

"Yeah, I guess you're right."

"Yeah, so, you coming to Angela's party this Saturday?"

"I um, yeah, well, her mother like, invited me, so I'm not sure what to do. Angela's like, still mad at me, because of the pictures, you know?"

"Yeah, the pictures… Kinda freaky, Krakow! I mean, stalking her, and just shooting away while she's like, practically *doing* it with Jordan… You have like, some nerve…"

"Yeah, look, I don't know what came over me, okay? But it happened; and I can't turn back time, so. Anyway, the principal had me get rid of them all after school. And he made a note on my record, so it's gonna haunt me like, the rest of my academic career, even if I didn't do it."

"But you still did it… Look, how about getting her an amazing gift, and if she still kicks you out after that, well, at least you've like, tried, you know?"

"I could do that, I guess. I mean, I can't *not* be there at her sixteenth Birthday party, it wouldn't be right."

"Yeah, I know, it's like, special and all. And you know, she like, didn't want to celebrate at first, you know, because of Mr K. But I told her she *has* to celebrate, and I guess it's like, okay for me, to plan it, and help out, and mingle with the guests and all."

Having lost his concentration, Brian's already cracking his brain for a gift to give to Angela. Who can he like, ask for advice? Which girl will tell him honestly what she would consider a great gift? "Rayanne!"

"Rayanne? What about Rayanne?"

"What? It's nothing, I was just, like, thinking, you know."

"Okay, Krakow, leaving now, before I get contaminated by your wacky madness."

Sneaking one more peek at the pictures of Rayanne, Brian gets out the books he needs. Closing his locker-door, he ensures the safe-keeping of the evidence of his sexual experiences.

**[Girls' restroom]**

_Angela VO: "This Saturday I'm__ finally gonna turn sixteen. My parents already planned like, this semi-big party for me; even if I'm not really in the mood to like, celebrate anything right now. You know, with Mr Katimski still in a coma and Jordan's mom like, showing up out of the blue and asking him to come live with her. __But __who knows, maybe a party will lighten Rickie up a little, you know? I'll ask Corey to come over for him. And I wonder what Jordan will like, get me. Oh and my dad's not working that night, which is like, cool. I sorta expected him to be there for my birthday anyway, but still."_

Talking, Angela and Sharon walk into the girls' restroom. Staring at their reflection in a mucky mirror, they almost simultaneously pout their lips to apply their lipstick.

"So, excited about your party, Chase Face? Can I like, expect another wardrobe-crisis or are you set already?"

"Yeah, I'm kinda excited, I guess. No, I've already got like, the perfect dress, you'll see!"

"Okay, can't wait! So, is your mother-in-law gonna be there too?" Sharon giggles.

"I dunno, but it's like weird isn't it, you know, Ms Summers being Jordan's mom and all."

"I know, it's like, beyond weird! You know, she like, gave me the wrong impression too, when it came to Jordan. We shouldn't always believe what we see, I guess."

"Yeah, I guess. And I'm like, happy for him, you know, because his dad is like, this complete bastard. I don't know how he put up with him all these years. His mom was like, *so* pissed at his dad; and I get it, I really do. But it's good, you know, he's got a chance to play happy family now. His parents talked it over the other night, and his father could care less about what Jordan's doing, so he's thinking about moving in with his mom."

"That's like, a big change. But it's good, he deserves to be happy, and his mom looks nice, I guess."

"Yeah, she's nice. Jordan said she didn't even flinch when she saw the picture of us, you know, the one Krakow made."

"She didn't? Wow, that's what I call like, modern parenting!"

"Yeah, I mean, my mom would probably like, freak, at the sight of it! And you know, now I know she's like, Jordan's mom and all, I can see the resemblance. It's totally obvious where he got his big, blue eyes."

"Oh, I know! Doesn't it like, freak you out? I mean, your boyfriend just got reunited with his mother, and she's like his teacher too. So, your mother-in-law is like, teaching you. It's odd."

Tucking a strand of red hair behind her ear, Angela smiles dreamily. "My mother-in-law… I never actually thought of her that way, you know."

_Angela VO: "I pictured myself getting married to Jordan like, __ever since I fell in love with him, I guess. I can just imagine how handsome he'll look in a suit, and my dress will be like…wow. I can see those cans attached to the back of Red, rattling over the streets just after we've said "I do". We'll be like, so happy, for the rest of our lives. It's not like I think we should get married soon or anything, but who knows, some day."_

**[Saturday night, Chase House]**

_Angela VO: "It's like, almost time for the first guests to arrive and I'm still stuck in my room, rethinking my outfit. The dress I like, bought, seems too much somehow. It's__ a skin-tight, black uniform-like dress; with buttons and red stitched accents on it. Strangely enough I could use Danielle's advice like, now. But my little sister decided to grow up and is going to another party tonight. She said she was really sorry to miss out on my party, but I guess she's choosing friends over family now. It's okay, she probably got that from me, so I can't blame her or anything." _

_Angela VO: "You know, whatever, I'm going down; it's *my* party and if they don't like me, that's like, *their* problem! World, you better get ready, 'cause here I come!"_

In the Chase's kitchen Graham and Rickie are preparing some snacks while Patty is gathering more glasses. Just as Angela walks down the stairs, the doorbell rings.

Embarrassing Angela, Neill and Hallie come walking in while singing 'Happy Birthday'. Handing her a huge present, Neill congratulates her. "Angela, we hope you have a great sweet sixteen and wish for many more happy birthdays to come! Now, please, follow us, because we've got something exciting to tell you!"

After having congratulated everyone with Angela's mile-stone, Neill and Hallie share a look before Neill kicks off. "We're getting married!"

Three surprised faces stare at Neill and Hallie. The doorbell ringing gives Rickie a perfect excuse to bolt out of the kitchen and give the family some privacy.

"I um, well, we didn't see that one coming, I guess, you know, this soon. Anyway, I do believe congratulations are in order for the happy couple!" Stepping forward, Graham hugs his brother and pats him on the back. Who would have thought his little brother ever got hitched!

"Yes, well, congratulations, Hallie! You took us by surprise there!" Smiling, Patty shakes hands with Hallie.

"Yes, I know it's soon, but let's face it: we're in love, and we're not that young anymore, so why wait? Neill popped the question and I figured, you know, what the hey! Oh, I'm so happy! And look at the size of this ring; doesn't it blind you with its beauty?" Holding out her hand, Hallie shows off the ring Neill shoved on her finger along with the proposal.

Dreamily, Angela stares at the ring on Hallie's finger. "Oh wow, Hallie, it's like, awesome! I hope that one day, Jordan will ask *me* to marry him, you know? Anyway, congratulations! You know, Neill's like my favourite uncle in the world, so look out for him, okay?"

The conversation is being interrupted when Rickie walks into the kitchen with Patty's parents. Grumpily, Patty's father asks, "Is this like, the new rage, having a party in the kitchen? If Graham worked a real job, maybe he could have bought you a bigger house, with a bigger kitchen in it."

"Hello dad, no, we were just chatting to Neill and Hallie, but we can go into the living room now." Whisking her father away by his arm, Patty beckons her mother to follow her as well.

After shaking a bottle of champagne vigorously, Graham uncorks it with a loud 'plop!' and pours them a few glasses. Creasing his brow, Graham eyes Angela. "Since it's your sixteenth Birthday, my dear daughter, I'll allow you a glass to join in the celebration!"

"Thanks, dad, but it's a little too late to go all 'Super-dad' on me now; you've fed me champagne before, you know?" Angela grins, sipping the bubbly.

"Sshh, that was supposed to be our little secret, remember?" Smirking, Graham pats Angela on her head.

**[A little later that night]**

_Angela VO: "Almost everyone who promised to come is like, here. Jordan Catalano is here too, but he hasn't given me my present yet. Maybe he like, __forgot to get me a present? He's acting like, even more quiet than usual, come to think of it. But I guess that's pretty normal when your long-lost-mother suddenly shows up again. _

"_But, he's here anyway and he looks so gorgeous, I wanna kick everyone out and just like, have mad and passionate sex with him. That's like, the best present he can give me anyway. I mean, loving me, not umm-ing me, obviously. But umm-ing Jordan takes up a good second place I guess."_

Rickie and Corey are having a lively conversation, while Jordan listens to Graham, Neill and Andy. Rayanne keeps stuffing her face with all sorts of snacks while Sharon chats with her. Patty's parents are talking to Hallie, while Camille chats with Patty. Other relatives are catching up on their family's gossip. Brian seems out of place, looking around for someone to talk to, until he notices Angela leaning in the windowsill.

_Angela VO: "My mom invited Brian Krakow, unaware of the pictures he took of her precious daughter, of course. __I had to do my best to convince the principal *not* to have my parents come to school for it. I convinced him - that besides being *in* the picture- I had nothing to do with 'spreading images of erotic substance through school'. Thank God he figured out that no teenager would voluntarily submit themselves to this kind of embarrassment, so I was off the hook. _

"_But if it were up to me, Brian wouldn't be here; with his like, strange obsession for me and Rayanne. I can't help but think there's like, something going on between them, even if Rayanne denied it. They're like, avoiding each other a little too much, you know? I guess when it comes to Brian; Danielle's word means more to me."_

"Angela? I didn't give you your present yet, you know." One of Brian Krakow's hands is searching his jeans pocket. Surfacing again, it's holding onto a little square present.

"You know I'm still not really speaking to you, right?"

"I know, but I wanted to give you this just the same."

Unwrapping the present, Angela can't help but think of the dream she once had, shortly after Brian wrote Jordan's apology-letter.

_Angela VO: "If it's a ring Brian's giving me, I'm gonna make a run for it, screaming!"_

Carefully, Angela opens up the little box to find a silver necklace lying in there. Holding it up, two delicate, silver angel wings are dangling at the end of it. They're sparkling with tiny rhinestones along the edges.

For a moment, Angela falls silent. "It's beautiful, Brian. Thank you. But I can't…"

"Please, just take it, you know. They just, like, made me think of you. You know, Angela, angel." Afraid she will mock him; Brian hesitates if he should explain himself further. What will happen if he tells her she's like, angelic to him? Like, heavenly?

"Thank you, really. It means a lot to me."

"You're welcome." Brian gets up and saves himself from further embarrassment by disappearing into the hallway.

_Angela VO: "Brian's present is beautiful, but is it like, fair for me to accept it? He's __persistent, that's for sure. He'll mess up my life and then do something like this to make it up again. I don't know what to do, I mean, do I have to tell him again that there will like, never be an *us*? He knows, right? No point to rub it in his face like, again."_

Still staring at the necklace, Angela gets accompanied by Sharon and Rayanne.

"What did Krakow give you?" Sharon leans in to take a closer look at the necklace.

Scooping her hand underneath the tiny dangling wings, Sharon eyes the exquisite craftsmanship. "Wow, Chase Face, it's gorgeous! He must really like, you, I guess. Poor Brian. So, what did Jordan like, get you?"

"Nothing. Yet, I hope." Angela's eyes seek out Jordan's for a brief moment.

"Nothing? You're kidding, right?"

"No, I'm not. So it had better be like, something really spectacular; especially after this." Angela holds out the necklace again.

"'Scuse me, gotta take a leak." Rayanne hiccups, giggles and dashes off without having spoken one word about the necklace or Brian.

**[Chase Hallway]**

"Krakow, what's up?" Rayanne plops down next to Brian on the foot of the stairs.

"Nothing."

"So, I see you like, used my advice, you know, about Angela's present."

"Yeah, I did. I feel like a fool though. She's like, with Jordan, so why do I bother anyway?"

"Dunno, 'cause you like, care for her, I guess."

"Yeah, but I mean, what's the point?"

"What's like, the point of anything? Here, have a sip; it'll clear your head." Rayanne holds out her flask.

"Clear it? More like fog it up, you mean, but like, whatever." Brian gets hold of the flask and his eyes meet Rayanne's. At once he forgets the topic of their conversation and sees an almost naked Rayanne, just like he did a few days ago.

"What?"

"Nothing, I um, I just thought about, you know, the other night." Brian gushes down a few sips of courage and wipes off his mouth with the back of his hand.

"What about it?" Rayanne cocks her eyebrow.

"It was like, you know, hot. I mean, you saw the pictures, right? The camera loves you, you know."

"Come on." Rayanne stomps up the stairs.

"Where are we going?" Brian gets to his feet and follows her.

"Upstairs."

**[Chase kitchen]**

While Angela refills her glass, Jordan silently approaches her from behind. His arms wrap around her waist and his lips brush over her neck before they give her a soft kiss.

"Hey you."

"So um, what did Brain like, give you?"

"He gave me like, this necklace with um, little angel-wings, very nice."

"Oh, so um, are you gonna wear it?"

"I guess so, why?"

"Nothing, just, you know, asking."

_Angela VO: "__I guess Jordan's still mad at Brian for taking the pictures, I know I am. And maybe he's even jealous, who knows?"_

Turning herself around, Angela faces Jordan now. Their eyes lock onto each other and Jordan's hand cups itself around her face, pulling her near. His other hand seeks out the soft curve of her butt. Softly, his lips brush over hers; his tongue darting along with it. Passionately, their mouths entangle in a kiss, hungrily devouring each other.

Abruptly, Jordan backs out of their kiss and his eyes seek out Angela's. Rummaging through the pockets of his shirt, he takes out an envelope. "I um… Here, this is yours."

_Angela VO: "Jordan Catalano gives me an envelope for my sixteenth birthday. Not a ring, or a necklace, but an envelope.__ I feel kinda disappointed but maybe I shouldn't judge him yet. Who knows what's inside…?"_

Almost afraid to open up the envelope, Angela's fingers take out its contents. "An airplane ticket? To Los Angeles?"

"Yeah, so you can come and see me." Jordan tucks his hair behind his ears.

"Come and see you, like, when, exactly?"

"I um, I didn't like, know, how to tell you this, but my mom, she like, asked me to come and live with her."

"Yes you told me that already, and that's fine and all, but I still don't get it."

"We're moving to LA, Angela."

_Angela VO: "__Jordan Catalano is moving to LA and he decided to wait and tell me that on the night of my sixteenth birthday party. How like, considerate of him. I feel like crying, you know? Finally my life was beginning to make sense, and now Jordan is moving all the way across the country. So much for daydreaming about our wedding, I guess."_

"Look, I um, I didn't know like, when, um…" Licking his lips, Jordan's eyes have trouble staying focused on Angela's.

This is hard on him too, and Angela's silent judgement won't make it any easier. It's like, scary to live with someone you don't really know and being away from everyone you *do* know. He could use her support too.

"You're gonna live in LA, with your mother. Where does that leave *me*, Jordan?" Angela takes a seat at the kitchen table.

"You know, that's why I like, bought you the plane ticket."

"So I can come and see you, *once*. And then what? I can't afford to keep buying plane tickets to fly over to see you, and I don't even have a driver's licence yet, let alone a car! And when are we gonna see each other exactly? Like, on holidays? What about the rest of the year? I can't do that, Jordan; you just can't like, expect me to do that."

"Look, I um, I don't know, but we can like, make it work, you know?" Jordan's hands seek out Angela's.

"I don't think so. We'll both live separate lives; you'll meet someone new and then you'll forget all about me. It'll be a matter of time before we break up anyway. I have to have all of you, not little bits every now and then."

"Come on, we can like, give it a try, right?"

"Right now, I don't know anything. I just wanna be alone for a while."

Abandoning Jordan who's staring at the little piece of paper that changed her life, Angela leaves the kitchen. Taking a sip from his beer, Jordan keeps ogling the ticket. Moving in with his mother will cost him Angela's love; is it really worth it?

**[Chase kitchen]**

Opening the kitchen door, Danielle appears to find a lonesome Jordan covering up part of the table with drained beer-bottles. "Hey, so, it looks like I didn't miss that much, I guess."

"Nope."

"So, why are you like, all alone in here?"

"Your sister's like, mad at me or something."

"Again? So, what did you like, do to her this time?"

"I'm moving to LA."

"Oh… That's like, far away, I guess."

"Yeah, I guess."

"So, did she like, dump you?"

"What?" For the first time during their conversation, Jordan takes his eyes of the beer-bottle in his hand and stares at Danielle.

"Did she dump you?"

"I um, I don't think so, no." Confusion takes over Jordan's features. He's not sure; did they break up? He can't move away without her support; he needs her, more than ever. He's not ready to give her up.

"Okay, whatever." Not bothering with Jordan anymore, Danielle looks up her mother in the living room.

**[Angela's bedroom]**

Underneath the covers of Angela's bed, Rayanne manages to lower her panties with one hand, while groping Brian's bare butt with the other. Coming out from under the sheets, her hand tosses her panties to the floor. Her fingers search the carpet for her flask, in desperate need of another sip. Interrupting their kiss, Rayanne chucks down the last few drops of her booze.

Suddenly, the door swings open, letting in big rays of light from the hallway. Startled, Rayanne pushes Brian's head away from her upper-body. Unmistakably, the silhouette in the door-opening belongs to Angela. Giggling, Rayanne can picture Angela's mouth hanging wide open, like it usually is when she's like, shocked.

"Oooh, this is just…" Afraid to take another step forward, Angela can't stop staring at her so-called friend who's lying in *her* bed, with someone else. "Rayanne? What are you…?"

From underneath the covers, Brian Krakow's head pops up. Shock settles on his features for a moment, abruptly replaced by embarrassment.

_Angela VO: "I came up to my room to be alone after what Jordan told me, and I catch Rayanne Graff in *my* bed__, having sex with Brian Krakow. This night can't get any worse!"_

Walking away from the scene is Angela's first instinct, until anger takes over her being. "What are you two doing in my bed? No, wait; don't tell me, you're discussing your love for me. Ugh, I just knew you were lying to me, Rayanne! And Brian, why are you like, letting her, use you?"

"Angelica! You know, it's more the other way around, if you ask me." Rayanne's voice sounds thick from the alcohol.

"Oh come on, you seduced *him*, it's like, so obvious! I know you, Rayanne!"

"Whatever, you know, it's your party, so."

"Look, Angela, we were just… it like, didn't mean anything, I mean, we um, we…" Pulling up the sheets to cover up his chest, Brian scans the floor for his clothes.

"Yeah, nothing means anything to both of you. You hurt me, betray me and lie to me. Why do you give me a necklace like that Krakow, and then have sex with like, the next person who comes along?"

_Angela VO: "It hurts to see Rayanne and Brian together, and it's not just because they lied to me. If Brian's supposed to be in love with me, why does he have sex with my so-called best friend? What does he like, expect from me? This is hardly the way to show me he likes me, in my humble opinion."_

"Look, Chase, I already told you, it doesn't like, mean anything. It's just, sex, you know? And it's not like it makes a difference anyway, since you chose to be with Jordan, remember?" Trying to block the flashes of light that hinder his vision, Brian holds his arm up to his forehead.

"Yeah, well, that's probably gonna be over soon anyway." A frown settles on Angela's features.

"No… you're like, gonna dump Jordan Catalano?" Rayanne shoots up straight, staring at Angela. "Ooh…" Dizziness makes her support her head.

"No, I'm not dumping him. It's like, none of your business anyway. It's something I will discuss with my *real* friends, you know?"

Angela gives Rayanne a blank facial expression before she continues, "I mean, Rayanne, don't you think it's like, time you quit drinking; for real this time? Look at you! You're totally wasted, screwing someone you hate in your so-called best friend's bed, at your friend's party. How *low* can you go, before…?"

"I hate Krakow? Yeah, I do, I hate him. I hate those cute, blond curls and the way he always dresses so, neatly. I hate how he always like, knows everything and how he like, gets straight A's like, all the time. I hate how he always goes to like, all his classes, and never skips one. I hate to be like, seen with him in public and I hate how he talks to me, sometimes. I hate that he's afraid to look beyond the lens of his camera and I hate how he like, likes you, Angela. I hate how this means nothing to him when I like, need more. I hate that he like, asks my advice for a gift to a girl and it turns out to be *you* instead of me. I hate how all the booze in the world won't like, shut him out of my brain anyway. I hate all of that, you know?"

_Angela VO: "__Oh my God, it sounds like Rayanne's got a crush on Krakow! Her words hardly make any sense, but I'm like, sure of it. Which is totally freaky, since she never gets emotionally attached to *any* guy. Whatever the reason, she shouldn't be in *my* bed with one of *my* friends at *my* party."_

"Look, I'm going downstairs. You two, get out of my bed, get dressed and get out of my sight, please. I can't handle anymore of this."

_Angela VO: "Some sweet sixteen party this is… I feel like __crawling into Jordan's arms, but he like, hurt me, you know? I need a hug, but I'm not like, sure who to turn to. It's like everyone chose this particular night to hurt me, and why? Don't they care about me, don't they like, care about my feelings?"_

**[Chase living room, a little later]**

Standing near the phone, Patty can only barely hear it ring over the noise coming from the chattering and music. "Hello?"

On the other end of the line, someone from the hospital asks for Enrique. Already knowing what the call signifies, Patty searches the room for Rickie with a heavy heart.

"This is Rickie, yes, Enrique Vasquez."

"Mr Vasquez, we're sorry to inform you, but Mr Katimski has passed away tonight."

"Oh no, he's… Oh my God, I can't believe… Thank you…" Sobbing, Rickie clutches the telephone in his hands. It can't be true, it just can't. He didn't expect Mr Katimski to wake up anymore, but he kept hoping it would happen anyway. But now, all hope is like, gone. Mr Katimski's gone.

Getting hold of the telephone, Patty puts it back on the hook. Gently, she pushes Rickie into the kitchen where they catch Jordan, who is surrounded by several empty beer-bottles. "Oh, Jordan, what are you doing here, all alone?"

"Just, um, no reason, you know." Putting down the drained beer bottle next to the six ones he already emptied, Jordan scurries away into the living room. He's not in the mood to talk to anyone; he just wants to drown himself in a delirium.

Hugging a crying Rickie in her arms, Patty eyes the beer bottles on the table. It looks like Jordan has a problem, too. No wonder when his father sets that example for him.

Weeping sounds bring her back to reality; she tries to comfort Rickie by telling him, "It's okay, just let it out. You're allowed to cry."

Over the past few weeks, Patty has taken a liking to Rickie. He's not a bad kid at all; he's a little shy and insecure, but he's got a heart of gold. He helps out whenever he can, which is more than she can say for Angela. Maybe living without her parents for a while would help Angela realise how lucky she is. Because Rickie knows when he's blessed, just like he knows when he's heartbroken.

This has been some night, Patty thinks to herself. Neill announced his engagement to Hallie, and Mr Katimski passed away. Angela will remember this night for many reasons, and so will she.

**[Chase ****staircase]**

Her feet feeling heavy, Angela treads down the last stair just when Jordan staggers into the hallway. "Jordan?"

"Angela, I… I don't wanna lose you." Jordan's knees give in and he collapses to the floor.

"What's wrong?" Quickly, Angela bends down to look at him.

"This is like, wrong. You, like, being mad at me. Me, like, drinking too much."

"Oh, come on, things will work out, you know? I gave it some thought already. We'll be fine."

_Angela VO: "If Jordan's like, really this upset because of me, it won't hurt to lie a little.__ I didn't even have time to think things over yet, but I already know we *won't* be fine. We'll talk about it when he's like, sober again."_

"So you didn't like, just dump me?" Stretching out his arms to hold Angela, Jordan rests his head against her chest.

"No, I didn't *dump* you; where would you get an idea like that?"

"Danielle."

Shaking her head at Jordan's answer, something dawns on Angela. "Hey, but you can't drive home like this, you know?"

Jordan nuzzles his nose in Angela's hair; his limbs weighing heavier by the minute. "Home? This is like, my home… right here."

_Angela VO: "__God, Jordan just called me his home! How sweet is that? Or um, how *drunk* is he? Anyway, I'm gonna scrape all the courage in the world together and ask my mom if Jordan can spend the night here. Surely she wouldn't want him to get killed by driving and drinking, would she? And I don't think she has to be concerned about us having sex under her roof, because I have a feeling Jordan's already half asleep anyway."_

**[Chase house, upstairs]**

Having gathered their clothes, Brian and Rayanne are fully dressed and ready to leave. They haven't spoken to each other since Angela left the room.

"So, um, just ignore what I said, Krakow. I was like, drunk. I mean, I still am, but, you know."

"Whatever Graff, it's not like I care."

"No, 'cause I'm not your precious little Angela."

"Look, I thought you were like, supposed to be her friend? Why do you keep like, saying these things about her?"

"I *am* her friend, you know! And I thought, you were like, her friend too. You're like, no better than me! Ha!" Staggering, Rayanne giggles. "So, why did you… you know… *screw* me?"

"I dunno, you're like, attractive I guess. And I'm like, a teenage boy, you know?"

"Yeah, screw over the school-slut, she's got like, no feelings anyway."

"Hey, you like, came on to *me*! Don't blame this on me!"

"I'm just saying, nobody cares, right? Oh, it's just Rayanne Graff, she'll like, screw anything that moves, just, you know, get her all liquored up, and she'll like, open up her legs for you!"

"You know, *you're* the one getting all liquored up. No one's like, forcing you to do it! You need to stop wallowing in self-pity and get your act together or you'll end up dead someday."

"Been there, done that. Well, almost. Shame, it didn't work."

"Look, I agree with Angela, you *seriously* need to stop drinking."

"'Course you agree with Angela, everyone agrees with Angela. You know, whatever, Krakow. I'm leaving."

Lurching, Rayanne leaves Angela's bedroom. She staggers into the bathroom as fast as her wobbly legs can carry her. Barely in time, Rayanne hovers her head over the toilet. Removing the hand that covers up her mouth, the contents of her stomach are spilled in the toilet, loudly. She's done it a million times before and has sworn to quit a million and one times. The acid burning in her throat, the stench surrounding her, the dried up crusts of vomit in the tips of her hair; they're all like, horrible habits she can't quit.

From a distance Brian is able to hear what Rayanne is doing. It's like, sad in a way. All this potential, her looks; they're all going to waste. Hesitating, he walks up to the door. "Graff, you okay?"

"Bite me, Krakow."

**[Chase house, kitchen]**

_Angela VO: "Watching my mom comfort a crying Rickie can only mean one thing; Mr Katimski passed away.__ The way my party was going tonight, this fits right in with all the other misery." _

"What happened?" Out ruling any other possibilities, Angela asks for confirmation anyway.

"Mr Katimski passed away tonight." Patty looks at Angela, pitying her.

"Oh… I'm sorry, Rickie. It's like, crap, I guess." Walking up to him, Angela takes over from her mother in comforting Rickie. "Some night this is…"

"You know, it's like, okay, I guess. I mean, it had to happen anyway, I think." Hugging Angela back, Rickie calms down.

"Honey, I'm so sorry for you that all these things had to happen tonight." Relating to her eldest daughter, Patty strokes Angela's hair.

"Yeah, well, things get like, worse. Jordan, he's like, totally wasted, so I was like, wondering if he could spend the night. 'Cause you know, you're always saying I shouldn't get in the car with someone when they're like, drunk."

"What? Well, look, um, it's not very responsible of him, now is it?" Wondering what to do, it occurs to Patty that Jordan's allowed to make a misstep. He's had a lot to deal with lately; the mother who supposedly abandoned him suddenly returned, that's a big deal!

"Please mom? It might be like, the last chance we have anyway. And you know, he's like, *too* wasted for us to… you know…"

"What do you mean; last chance?"

"Jordan is moving in with his mom, somewhere in Los Angeles."

_Angela VO: "When I said it out loud, it hit me again. Jordan Catalano will be out of my life__, for good."_

"Oh my God, Angela! When did he like, tell you?" Backing out of their embrace, Rickie eyes Angela.

"Tonight. He bought me a plane ticket so I could come and see him."

"A plane ticket? Okay, maybe not like, very romantic in a sense, but it's like, a really good sign from him, I guess." Rickie looks away dreamily.

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry for you. This party is not what any of us expected." Patty takes a sip of champagne.

"Yeah, I know. It's more like my *sad* sixteen, or like, my *so-called* sweet sixteen."

"Jordan is welcome to stay here; it's the least I can do for you, and him."

"Thanks mom, I really appreciate it." Angela walks up to her mom and buries her face in her mother's hair.

_Angela VO: "Smelling my mother's hair, and cradling myself in her embrace took me __right back to when I was a little girl. All the things I had seen and heard tonight rose up to the surface and made me sob like a little girl. I couldn't stop crying anymore, I felt so sad. My life as I know it is over, and it's so depressing to think about that." _

"_Happy sixteenth birthday to me." _

**To be continued…**


	14. Episode 33: It Must Have Been Love

_A/N: The beta'd version will substitute this one, some day..._

**********************************************

_Angela VO: "I never thought that turning sixteen would make such a big difference in my life. __I feel like I have a major hangover when I didn't even drink that much. It's just everything that like, happened last night, makes me feel sick. I still can't believe Jordan is moving away. Also, I'm like, not in the mood to see either Rayanne or Brian after what they did to me, in my *own* bed. In a few days Mr Katimski will be buried and Rickie will move into the Pride House. Suddenly it's like, life is moving fast forward and I can't keep up anymore."_

**[Chase House, Sunday morning]**

Watching Jordan still sound asleep, Angela's fingertips gently brush over his hair. She changed the sheets of her bed before she went to sleep; the thought that Brian and Rayanne had *sex* in here, revolted her. Barely shifting her body, Angela still isn't feeling comfortable in her own bed.

_Angela VO: "Last night, Jordan kept me up with his drunkenness. I've never seen him like that before. When I was trying to make the bed, he kept trying to kiss me. Finally we lay down, __when he started to giggle and laugh foolishly. After a while he stopped doing that but he started tossing and turning, meanwhile moaning and reaching for his stomach, telling me how nauseous he felt. At last he fell asleep, only to keep me awake again by *snoring* extremely loud. So, it feels like I haven't slept at all. But I know why he drank too much; it's because he's afraid of losing me. That makes me feel so happy and sad at the same time, I'll forgive him."_

Cuddling up to Angela, Jordan sneakily opens his eyes. "Hey."

"Hey you, how do you feel?"

"Like crap."

"Yeah, I know; me too."

"But this is good, being here, with you."

"Yeah, it's good, it's like, really good."

_Angela VO: "This might be like, the last time I get to spend the night with Jordan. I'm gonna stretch out this morning as long as possible."_

"So, LA…" Even though she's afraid to spoil their time together, Angela brings up the subject anyway.

"Yeah, my mom she um, she used to live there like, most the time."

"Okay, it makes sense then, I guess."

"Yeah, she's got like, relatives and friends there, you know. And it might be like, easier for me to, you know, do something with my music. It's like, ironic that I have to start a new band now, before I can like, do anything, but, you know…" The more Jordan thinks it through, the more he realises what he's giving up to live with his mother; his music, his friends, and maybe even his girlfriend.

"Yeah, who knows this is like, your ticket to fame, Jordan Catalano."

"I'd settle for like, being happy."

"Oh, I'm sure you will be happy. It' just takes some time, you know, to adjust and make new friends and stuff."

_Angela VO: "All this time the only person I thought about was *me*, but what about Jordan? He's like, giving up *everything* to be with his mother. It's like__, he has to start over with his life completely! In a way it's like reliving the first day at school over and over again, only ten times worse. __God, how could I have been like, this blind? My Jordan Catalano obsession kept me from looking at things from *his* point of view. It's like, he finally turned me into __this considerate girlfriend, and then he's like, leaving. Or maybe it's because he's leaving, I'm finally able to see the truth."_

"I hope so."

Unable to find words that will show her understanding and ease his pain, Angela huddles up closer to Jordan, locking her eyes onto his. Her fingertips comb through his hair and trail over his stubbly cheeks. Very gently, their lips encounter each other in a soft kiss; before their passion takes over slowly. Expressing their love through words is abundant; their souls meet in a heavenly place they created for themselves.

**[Monday morning, school girls' restroom]**

"So, Angela, what like, happened with you and Rayanne? She came up to me Saturday night, totally wasted, asking me if she could crash at my place. And the next morning, she like, told me, she's thinking about going into rehab." Sharon fixes a few hairs that have gone stray.

"She said that? Really?"

"Yeah, she said she was done living life by the bottle, or something like that. That's like, a huge step for her, you know?"

"I know, wow, so she's actually gonna turn her life around. Good for her."

"Yeah, like, good for her. So, what made her take this desperate decision, Angela?"

"She like, really didn't tell you what happened? I'm surprised."

"No, she like, threw up, stumbled to the couch and then went out like a light. The next morning she was already gone when I got up, so."

"I caught her and Krakow having sex, in *my* bed."

"What? You're like, kidding, right? Graff and Krakow?"

"Yeah, Graff and Krakow… having sex… in my bed."

"Oh that's like, totally gross, you know?"

"I know; I keep feeling filthy in my own bed; it's like, disgusting."

"Ugh, I know, but I don't get it. I thought that Krakow was like, into you? He gave you that necklace, right? You don't just do that to like, anyone."

"Yeah, that's what I thought too. When I caught him with Rayanne he kept insisting that it was like, nothing, that it was just sex, you know? But the weird thing is that Rayanne said something that made me think she's got a crush on him."

"Rayanne's got a crush on Krakow? Get outta here! There's gotta be like, something wrong with the universe!"

"Trust me, there is. I never told you what Jordan gave me, did I?"

"No… So, tell me, what did he like, get you?"

"A plane ticket to LA."

"A what? A plane ticket?"

"Yeah, it seems he's like, moving there, with his mom. This weekend."

"Oh Angela, you had like, a crappy birthday…" Sharon can't resist the urge to hug her friend.

_Angela VO: "Maybe it's like, selfish of me and all, but__ I *hate* Jordan Catalano's mom, I hate that she's taking him away from me. She's like, depriving me of oxygen, by depriving me of Jordan. I won't be able to survive without him; I can't and I don't want to."_

**[Tuesday, school hallways]**

"Sharon, wait up!" Hastily, Kyle runs across the hallway. "Hey, I never get to see you anymore, it's like, you disappeared from the earth or something!"

"There's like, a reason for that, Kyle." Lately, Sharon has been avoiding Kyle. She had a hard time dealing with her almost-pregnancy.

"Yeah? Come on, how about it; you, me and a Brad Pitt movie?"

This is exactly the reason why Sharon tries to stay away from Kyle. It's like he knows that Brad Pitt is like, her soft spot and they'll end up having sex again. But since she almost became a teenage-mom, having sex with someone she's not committed to is a no-go.

Stopping dead, Sharon takes a deep breath before she continues, "Look, Kyle, I never had like, the guts to tell you this before, but we're like, really through. I just thought, you know, your feelings for me would like, weaken, over time and I didn't see the harm in us still, you know, having sex."

"Look, it's not like I didn't see this coming, you know, but um, okay, if you don't wanna hang out with me like, ever again, well, then I'll stop asking you to."

"Kyle, I…" Wondering if she should tell Kyle the whole truth to make him see *why* they can't hang out anymore, Sharon pauses to think for a moment. "It's not like we can't be friends anymore?"

Even if Kyle was her first *real* boyfriend -meaning she never had to deal with these things before- Sharon realises that a boy and girl can't be 'just' friends. That's not the way it works, she experienced it herself.

"Yeah, we can still be like, friends." Kyle thinks to himself this is really like, the end. Sharon is a great girl and when she broke up with him, it actually hurt. Hanging out with her after that gave him hope; hope that she might still have feelings for him anyway. But this is better; now they can both like, move on, instead of remaining caught in a vague and meaningless fling.

"Okay, so, goodbye friend. See you around, I guess." Knowing that from now on, Kyle and she will only pass each other by in the school hallways like they never meant anything to each other, Sharon walks away.

**[Tuesday evening, Chase House]**

Sitting on her bed, Angela is doing some homework. Suddenly the door flings open and Danielle skips into the room.

"I told you to *knock*, Danielle." Angela hates it when people come barging in unannounced.

"Oh, yeah, I'm sorry. So, I never told you about my party." Putting her sister's books aside Danielle hops onto Angela's bed.

"I guess not. I hope you had a better time than I did."

"You know how you said I would forget about Brian Krakow, and meet another boy?"

"Yeah, so?"

"Well, we did this game, you know, like, spin the bottle. You have to turn the bottle and when it points at this boy, you have to like, go into the closet and make out for five minutes."

"I know spin the bottle, Danielle."

"Anyway, Ryan and I we had to, you know, go into the closet."

"You and Ryan, huh?" Wondering whether Danielle isn't too young to be kissing guys, Angela recalls the age she had her first kiss being only one year later.

"Yep, Ryan and I kissed. It was great, Angela. He said I was a good kisser, too! I think we're going steady now."

_Angela VO: "At that age, going steady means something entirely different. You may *think* you're feeling mature and ready, but you're still like, clueless. It sounds so cute when Danielle says it__; it makes me want to go back to the time when it didn't hurt so much, when a crush wasn't answered and a kiss was just a kiss."_

Giggling, Angela eyes her little sister. "So, you kissed… When's the wedding gonna be?"

_Angela VO: "As cute and innocent as it may sound, Danielle has taken her first steps into puberty and adulthood. By kissing Ryan, she has officially said goodbye to her childhood."_

"No, we wanna take things slow. We're not getting married, yet."

"Don't rush into things, Danni. Just enjoy it while it lasts, before you know it you're obsessed with someone who's leaving you."

**[****Wednesday, at the cemetery]**

_Angela VO: "In my whole life, I haven't experienced that many funerals yet. Most of the people that were buried didn't even mean that much to me, so I didn't really__ like, care, I guess. When Sharon's dad had his heart attack I was scared he would die, and I was even scared that *my* dad would like, die too. In one measly heartbeat life can be over, and that's really frightening if you think about it."_

Amidst a recently mown, green lawn, a freshly dug grave is housing the coffin entrusted to the earth moments ago. Pale rays of sun are being filtered through some clouds. Slowly, black clad students, teachers, family and friends are walking away from the dark-looking sandy spot, which is waiting to be filled up totally.

Standing on either sides of him, Rayanne and Angela are comforting a sobbing Rickie as he walks to the grave for one last time. Rickie's fingers release a single white rose into the pit, falling onto the polished black coffin with a dimmed thud. "Gee whiz, Mr K, parting is such sweet sorrow. Thanks for everything; I'll never forget you…"

_Angela VO: "__Today was the first funeral in my life that really touched me. I actually liked Mr Katimski, and it's even harder to see Rickie in so much pain over him. He was like a father to Rickie, the father he never had but deserved anyway. And now he's like, gone, forever. Forever is like such a strange thing; I can't imagine never seeing someone again. I can't like, imagine, what my life will look like without my dad, or more realistically, without Jordan Catalano." _

Crying vigorously, Rickie is being whisked away from the grave by Angela and Rayanne. Near the red American car already waiting for them, Jordan is flicking away his almost finished cigarette stub. Rayanne and Angela huddle up to Rickie in the backseat to keep him company. Trying to calm him down by smothering his tears in hugs and kisses, Angela makes sure to avoid Rayanne as much as possible. It's the first time this week she sees Rayanne; she never showed up at school, probably feeling ashamed after what happened.

_Angela VO: "I wish there was like, something I could do to make Rickie feel better. It hurts so much to see him like this, but I can't think of anything to say to him. Everybody keeps saying that it was like, better this way, you know? That it was like, better for Mr Katimski to die without more suffering. But they don't know if he would have suffered, they don't know anything. And now what, will he be going to heaven? Does __heaven even exist, or is it like, this big lie, invented to keep us from behaving like sinners?"_

**[Friday ****afternoon, Chase house]**

_Angela VO: "I watch Red disappear from my view for the last time but one. Tomorrow, Jordan Catalano leave__s for LA; tomorrow I have to say goodbye to him. But tonight, I have like, permission to spend the night at his house. Jordan will pick me up in a few hours, so we can be together one last time."_

Entering the kitchen, Angela finds Rayanne leaning against the cupboards, talking to Graham like nothing ever happened.

"What are you doing here?" Angela drops her backpack on the table and discards of her coat.

"Can I like, talk to you?"

"Whatever." Walking into the abandoned living room, Angela is being followed by Rayanne, who apparently mistook Angela's indifference for approval.

"I'm sorry, okay?"

"You expect me to believe that?" Angela plops down on the couch.

"I mean it this time, Angelica." Rayanne takes a seat across from her.

"Don't call me by that name, I hate it."

"Listen, I'm serious. I'm going into rehab to prove to you I mean it. I'm leaving tomorrow."

Angela locks her eyes onto Rayanne's. "I'm glad you're doing that, I really am."

"Look, what more do you like, want from me?"

"I want you to stop having sex with the boys I like!"

_Angelo VO: "The boys I like? I don't like Krakow, do I? I mean, I *like* him, but not like I like Jordan. Oh no, there's a huge difference!"_

"Oh don't tell me you like Krakow all of a sudden! Jordan's like, leaving town and all at once you're like, into Krakow?"

"I'm not into Krakow, okay? He's a friend, that's all. And why would it matter to you?"

"Just 'cause, you know, I like him." Rayanne's lips have trouble forming the words her mind wants to scream out. But now they're out in the open.

"I figured that already from your drunken I-hate-Krakow-speech. But I'm not sure he's like, into you, I mean, besides the having-sex-thing obviously."

"Yeah, I know. It's pretty clear he's like, not, I guess. Anyway, maybe rehab will help me kick the old Brian-habit too, who knows. He's like, not worth my time anyway."

"Yeah, maybe, who knows? Look, I'm like, still mad at you for doing what you did, but it means a lot to me you're going into rehab."

"Yeah well, it was like, time, I guess."

"Look Rayanne, I hope you realise you shouldn't be doing this for me, but for you. It's *your* life you keep screwing up, I mean, I'll get over this, but one day you might not. You came so close to dying already; I still don't get that you like, didn't wake up for good after that, you know?"

"Yeah, yeah, I know. I *am* doing this for me, believe me."

"So, tomorrow?"

"Yeah, tomorrow morning; Amber's gonna drop me off. Will you come and like, wish me luck, you know?"

"I can't. Jordan's like, leaving tomorrow, so."

"Oh, that's tomorrow? Like, this tomorrow?"

"Like, this tomorrow, yeah. I still can't believe it, you know?"

"Yeah, I know what you mean. One minute you have him, the next you like, don't. I'm sorry for you, Chase."

"Thanks. I'll be fine, I hope. Maybe we'll see each other again, who knows."

"Yeah, who knows, right? Look, I um, gotta split. Take care, and if you're like, in the neighbourhood, come visit me, you know." Rayanne leaps up from the seat, moving towards the door.

"I will, I promise. Good luck, Rayanne. Hang in there." Angela follows Rayanne to the door, hugging the always restless girl one last time.

"Bye." Running across the street, Rayanne looks back at Angela once more.

"Goodbye, Rayanne Marie Graff." Leaning her head against the doorpost, Angela watches her odd friend bolt away. Closing the door, Angela puts a strand of red hair behind her ear. "I'm gonna miss you, I guess."

**[Krakow's ****place, Friday afternoon]**

Simply strolling through the backdoor like she does it all the time, Rayanne totally surprises Brian.

"Graff? What are you doing here? Oh wait, don't tell me, you came to eat my food again."

"What's up with the sarcasm, Krakow?"

"You know, all you like, ever wanted from me was like, food and sex and pictures, so."

"That's not true. So, got any then?"

"Got like, what?"

"Duh, food!"

"You're like, impossible, you know that?"

"I'm kidding, Krakow, relax."

"Oh, yeah, I knew that."

"Yeah, right." Rayanne smirks. "Besides, maybe I like, wanted more, you know?"

"Yeah? Like, more what?"

"Look, if you weren't like, so busy chasing Chase all the time, you could have like, known."

"Actually, I know it, I think. But it doesn't matter anyway. This thing between us, it would like, never work, you know? We're like, two different species; we're not meant to like, breed."

"Believe me, I know. It's not like I can picture us like, holding hands in school, and like, going to the movies and stuff." Disgust takes over Rayanne's features and looking at Brian is like staring into a mirror with the same expression. It makes her smirk and eases her heart.

Laughing, Brian continues, "No, we look like, ridiculous together, I guess. So, why are you like, really here?"

"I'm going into rehab tomorrow, I just thought, you know, I'd stop by and let you know."

Falling silent, Brian isn't quite sure what to say. "Oh."

"Yeah, I know, it's, like, you know…"

"So, good luck then, I guess." Sticking out his hand, Brian wants to wish Rayanne the best of luck.

Their eyes lock onto each other's and before either of them knows what's happening; their lips have crashed into each other's in a violent kiss. Powerless to stop their bodies, they surrender to their feelings one last time. Pushing Brian up the stairs, Rayanne leaves a trail of clothes behind her on the staircase. Obliging willingly, Brian follows her example and when they reach the top of the stairs, they're both fully naked. Enjoying each other right then and there, their limbs entangle into sort of a sex-spaghetti; unable to tell where one person ends and the other begins. Sighing and moaning fill in the silence until they reach their climax abruptly. Relaxed laughter is the result of celebrating their animalistic feelings.

**[Jordan's place, Friday night]**

_Angela VO: "This is like, *really* the last night I'm gonna be with Jordan. His room is like, depressingly empty, and it's like, mocking me with its hollowness. The packed boxes and bare walls keep reminding me things will change like, for ever. __The first time I was in here I felt practically the same; trapped in a place where I desperately wanted to be, but at the same time scared to death because of all the feelings that like, washed over me."_

"God, this place looks so, empty." Walking around the room, Angela is actually surprised the bed is still there.

"Yeah, I know. It's like, unreal, you know?"

"Yeah, I know."

"I um, here, I made this for you." Jordan hands Angela a cassette-tape.

"What's this?" Looking at the cassette, the gloomy feelings that housed inside Angela are being taken over by bliss. A smile spreads over her face when she sees the text Jordan wrote.

'_To Angella,_

_With love from Jordan.'_

"I um, I know how to spell your name and all, but I thought this would be like, um, funny I guess. So you won't forget like, who gave it to you." Jordan tucks his hair behind his ears.

Angela laughs. "That's so sweet of you, Jordan. But I don't think I'll ever forget you, you know."

"Yeah? So um, last night, the guys from the band like, threw me kind of a going-away party. We um, played together like, for the last time. Well, you know, with me in the band, anyway. So, I um, I taped the songs for you. 'Set Me Free' is like, the first one on it, so."

"Thank you, this is like, the best gift anyone's ever given me."

_Angela VO: "Jordan Catalano taped the songs from his band for me__, the song he wrote especially for me, too. That's the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me! It makes my heart like, fill up with *so* much love for him, I'm afraid it'll explode or something. And you know, I think I'm gonna cry now."_

Trying very hard to hold back the tears, Angela swallows away the lump that's clogging up her throat. Instead of thinking about tomorrow, she wants to try to enjoy the evening with Jordan.

"You okay?" Wrapping his arms around her waist, Jordan plants a tender kiss on Angela's lips.

"Yeah, I'm fine. So um, what did you have in mind?" Looking at Jordan with played innocence, Angela knows exactly how they will be spending their last evening together.

_Angela VO: "I can't like, stop gazing into the most amazing blue eyes I have ever seen. I don't think I'll ever meet anyone else with so much depth__, openness and emotion in his eyes. Jordan's eyes keep drawing me in, and cloud my head up with the most intense blue colour like, known to mankind. For the rest of my life, I'll be reminded of him when I see like, a deep blue ocean, or a bright, cloudless summer sky. Even a star clad sky at night reminds me of Jordan's eyes. It's like, all the elements of the sky come together in these two eyes, promising me heaven on earth, and mystical nights to remember forever."_

**[At the cemetery, Saturday morning]**

"I knew you'd be here." Rayanne walks up to Mr Katimski's grave.

"Yeah, just, you know. I miss talking to him, I guess." Squatting, Rickie adjusts some floral arrangements on the big patch of sand that harbours Mr Katimski's body.

"Yeah, that like, makes sense."

"So, you're really like, going through with it?" Getting up, Rickie walks away from the grave alongside Rayanne.

"Yup, it's like, time, I guess. If I like, ever wanna go to acting-school, I'd better start sorting out my life, you know?"

"You have no idea how happy I am you're actually like, giving this a try."

"Yeah, well, maybe I'll get used to living like, a sober existence. You know, without actually trying to kill myself because of like, complete and utter boredom, who knows."

"I hope so, 'cause it's a shame, you know?"

"Yeah, yeah. So, will you like, come visit me?"

"Definitely!" Rickie and Rayanne embrace each other tightly. Backing out of their hug, Rickie's fingers brush over Rayanne's blond strand of hair. "Good luck, Rayanne Graff."

"Thanks and like, take care, Rickie. See you around." Getting in Amber's car, Rayanne keeps her eyes fixated on Rickie until he's nothing more than a tiny black dot in the dreary landscape.

Watching Rayanne and Amber fade away, Rickie feels even more alone and deserted. Yet another person is being taken from his life. But if Rayanne succeeds, she'll be back better than ever. It would be nice to hang out with her without worrying all the time. She's a handful, but he can't blame her. She's the product of a messed up family-life, just like he.

**[Outside Jordan's place****, Saturday morning]**

_Angela VO: "As I watch Jordan Catalano pack the last few things in his car, I can't help but feel like he's packed my heart in there too, somewhere. He's taking it with him and I'm unable to retrieve it."_

"So, you all set?" Leaning against Jordan's car, Angela watches him.

"Yeah, I guess. The movers will like, pack up the rest of my stuff." Jordan tucks his hair behind his ears and opens up the door for Angela.

_Angela VO: "__I don't want to get in Jordan's car, because if I do it's like I'm voluntarily slashing up my wrists. Allowing him to drop me off at home, is like allowing him to walk out of my life, like, forever. The pain I feel burning inside is probably worst than the pain you feel when you're cutting your wrists, but it has the same result: ending my life; messy, and too soon." _

Sitting in silence for the duration of the drive, they pull up to Angela's place.

"So, I um, I'm gonna go and like, say goodbye to your parents and um, Danielle. You coming?" Jordan gets up and lingers near the car.

"No, I'll wait here." Stepping out of the car, Angela leans into the side wall of their house.

_Angela VO: "Jordan Catalano__'s father barely spoke two words to him this morning; he didn't even wish him luck or anything. God, it must be such a relieve to get away from someone like that, I guess. Right now, Jordan's saying goodbye to my family and when he gets back, I have to do the same thing. I don't know if I can though; I'd rather hold on to him like, forever. But it wouldn't be fair to hold him back, so I have to let him go. No matter how much my heart is going to break, I've gotta do it to let him know how much I love him."_

After a short while, Jordan returns. Wrapping his arms around her waist, his eyes meet hers. "So, come and see me in LA, okay?"

"I will." While pressing her nose onto his, Angela's hands wander over Jordan's body.

_Angela VO: "I will? How can I go and see him, when I know it will only break my heart all over again? __It would be like, crazy, you know? It's like waking up from a severe heart surgery and then allowing someone to pull out the stitches again, slowly. Without being sedated. Seeing him will only make things worst. I can't see him without wanting him; in my arms, my dreams and my life._

Looking up at him, Angela says, "Jordan, I'm setting you free."

"What? What do you um, mean?"

"I'm breaking up with you, I guess."

"What? No, you um, you can't. You said you would like, come and see me, so."

"I know, and maybe I will. But it's for the best, trust me. I don't want to hold you back, and don't want you to feel like, guilty because you left me behind here."

"I won't. Angela, I um, I *need* you, you know?" Panicking slightly, Jordan never expected Angela to really break up with him. He needs to know he'll see her again, like, soon. He can't go away without knowing they're okay.

"No you don't. You'll do fine without me. You'll forget about me soon enough. Besides, you have other things on your mind that you need to focus on."

"I can't believe you're like, dumping me. I thought, you know, you liked me?"

"I do, Jordan. I love you." Her stomach ties in a knot when the words slip from her mouth.

"Oh…" Flicking his tongue over his lips, Jordan blurts out, "Me too."

Having wanted to tell her a thousand times before, he was never able to do so. He waited for Angela to say the words first, because he wasn't gonna open himself up, just to get hurt. She's not dumping him because she doesn't love him, and that knowledge will have to suffice for now.

_Angela VO: "__I never told Jordan Catalano that I love him, I guess I was afraid of his reaction or something. It's like, strange when you think about it, you know? I've loved him all along; it was like my whole being knew it, breathed it even. Every thought I have is about him, everything I do is for him. So why did I wait until like, the last second, to tell him that? Why did I wait until the last second to find out Jordan Catalano loves me back?"_

A teardrop trickles down Angela's cheek. After brushing it away with his thumb, Jordan presses his lips onto hers. Mixed emotions take them over; feelings of passion, love, fear and grief battle inside of them. Their lips gently taste and suckle each other's, their tongues explore for the last time; leaving behind the bittersweet taste of farewell.

Tightening his embrace, Jordan slowly retracts his lips from Angela's to gaze into her eyes. "So… Goodbye, I guess." His voice sound hoarse.

"Yeah… Goodbye; and good luck. I hope you're happy, you know?"

"You too. So, maybe I'll um, see you around?"

"Maybe… You just get settled over there, and who knows?"

Kissing him one last time, Angela takes hold of his hands. "You should go."

"Yeah, I know."

"Have a safe trip, and say hi to your mom for me, okay?"

"I will; thanks." Letting go of Angela's hands, Jordan gets in the car.

Angela walks up to the driver's side window and sticks her head inside once more. A final kiss is followed by, "I'll miss you."

"Me too. Bye Chase." Starting the engine, Jordan checks his mirrors.

"Bye, Jordan Catalano." Taking a few steps back, Angela watches Jordan drive out of her life; taking with him everything that she knows, owns and loves.

_Angela VO: "Is it possible to see a heart actually like, break? Right now, it feels like my heart is being ripped from my chest, leaving me nothing but an empty gap filled with pain. The tears I feel coming up; won't be able to ease th__at pain. It's like my heart is bleeding and it's coming through my eyes in the shape of salty teardrops."_

After Jordan has become nothing more than a little, black dot, barely to be seen inside of Red, Angela watches Red turn into a small glitch on the concrete. Long after both Jordan and Red have disappeared from sight, Angela's eyes keep being glued in that direction anyway.

***********************************************************************

Unaware to the world surrounding her, Angela doesn't seem to notice Brian Krakow cycling circles in front of his house. As the circles draw nearer to her, she startles from her thoughts.

"So, Catalano left, I guess?"

"Yeah..." Lacking the energy to squabble with Brian, Angela answers him without thinking. A feeling of paralysis has numbed her limbs; it's like all the life is drained from her.

"Bummer, I guess." Realising he somewhat understated Angela's feelings, Brian continues hastily, "Here, you can have them." Coming to a halt right before Angela, Brian hands her an envelope.

Looking up at him, Angela answers with a hint of sarcasm, "Let me guess, another plane ticket?"

"What? No, it's um, it's the negatives and some prints of the pictures of you and Catalano. I don't need them anymore… I mean, I want you to have them, you know, before they fall into the wrong hands again." Hoping Angela will be able to trust him again by this gesture, Brian eyes her tear-stained face without knowing what to say.

"Oh, thanks, I guess. Look, I um, I'm gonna go inside now." Scrambling to her feet, Angela walks towards the door.

"You're welcome. Look, I never meant to…" Brian watches Angela move away from him.

"I know, Krakow. You never meant for like, anything to happen. It's just *you*, I guess."

Both of them think the same thing; how it's like, nothing has changed between them, no matter what happened. Jordan Catalano came, and left, but their awkward relationship is still the same.

**[Pride House, Saturday ****afternoon]**

While Rickie, Corey and Delia are unpacking a few boxes; Graham and Patty come walking in. Slumping in after them is Angela. Dropping the contents of his hands into a box, Rickie greets them enthusiastically. "Hey!"

"Hey, Rickie. Wow, this is a great room, well, a great house too!" Graham takes in the environment.

"Yeah, I know. Thanks, Mr C." Looking a bit past Graham, Rickie catches the sight of Angela.

Walking up to her, he whisks her away into the hallway for a moment. "So, did Jordan like, really leave?"

"Yeah, I mean, what'd you expect him to do? Stay?" Angela leans against the wall.

"No, I mean… Come on, you know what I mean. I'm sorry for you."

"Yeah well, sorry won't bring him back."

"I know. Being sorry has never brought anyone back."

_Angela VO: "Oh God, I like, forgot that Rickie knows almost exactly how I feel. Mr Katimski's not coming back either. At least Jordan is alive and well, I *could* go and see him if I like, wanted to, I guess."_

"Oh, I'm sorry, Rickie. It's just…"

"Hey, I know, Angela." Embracing her, Rickie says, "As a great man once said: "it's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all," or something like that anyway. But hey, what does he know? He's not like, the one who's left behind to deal with the pain and face the emptiness, like day in and out."

While Angela sobs into Rickie's shirt, he grabs her by the shoulders and fixes his eyes onto hers. "You'll live, I promise."

"So will you, I guess. We gotta stick together, Enrique."

"Yeah, you, me and the other ones whose names I can't like, come up with right now."

Laughing through her tears, Angela asks Rickie, "So… Corey's helping you out, is he?"

"Yeah, he um, we um…" A blush creeps up Rickie's cheeks. "We had a very good talk, you know, at your party."

"Yeah? Like, what kinda talk?"

"You know, he asked me like, where Rayanne was, so I said he should like, stop asking me. He asked me why and I um, I said I didn't like his interest in her. So, he just gave me this, like, really intense look before he continued. He said something like he didn't feel at ease around me, without Rayanne there. So, I told him I like, felt the same way."

Rickie takes a deep breath before he continues, "So, we had this talk about, you know, being gay and when you like, knew for sure. And he asked me how I handled it and how everybody felt about it. I told him it took some time for me to like, accept it and how I actually hadn't really come out to the entire world, you know. So, he like, asked me if I like, wanted to help him, because he was feeling the same way."

"Oh my God! So, Corey's like, gay too? But how does he feel about you, I mean…?"

"Not only is he gay, I think he likes me too." A smile curls up Rickie's face before he leans in to whisper to Angela. "He like, kissed me, the other day."

"What? Oh Rickie, that's like, so great! I'm so happy for you!"

_Angela VO: "I really am happy Rickie finally found someone__; he deserves to be happy, or should I say; gay? But God, it's like, confronting, you know? Everybody seems to be with someone, even Danielle's got a boyfriend! And I just dumped the most sweet and gorgeous boy that ever roamed the planet."_

**[****Chase House, Monday, one week later]**

Lying face-up on her bed, Angela stares at a picture of Jordan and her. As her fingertips brush over Jordan's features, tears well up in her eyes again.

_Angela VO: "It's like it never happened, you know? Like Jordan Catalano never existed, and he never even kissed me or had sex with me. __Maybe it was all just like this big dream. It's like this photograph of him and I, is the only evidence that proves it. But I want more than just some fading memory; left wondering here what might have been."_

Looking at her alarm-clock tells Angela she has to get out of bed soon, but she doesn't feel the urge to do anything all day, besides looking at Jordan's picture and crying.

_Angela VO: "__I'm relating to Anne Frank in a different way now, finally understanding what it feels like to be trapped. I'm watching the world happen right outside my window, but I'm unable to participate. My imprisoned heart keeps me like, locked inside the walls of my tormented soul." _

Turning over to her other side, Angela curls up into a little ball. Her eyes remain fixated to the picture clutched in her hands. There's no one she wants to see, no one she want to be with. Nobody can understand what she's going through anyway.

_Angela VO: "__Besides, even if I like, wanted to, I can't go out into the world anymore; it's like I have no business there. And I don't want the world to see me anyway, 'cause I don't think that they'd understand."_

Closing her eyes, Angela tries to reproduce the feeling of Jordan's lips onto hers. Nuzzling her nose into the covers, she sniffs up the scent that reminds her of Jordan. It's a good thing her mother doesn't wash anything she doesn't throw into the hamper anymore. She wants to be embraced by Jordan's scent for as long as possible. Maybe she'll never wash the sheets again, who knows.

_Angela VO: "__I want to hide away under my covers, cry myself into a deep sleep and never wake up again. What's the point of getting up, getting dressed and going to school? What's the point of living without Jordan Catalano? If it weren't for my mom dragging me out of bed every single morning and making sure Sharon rides the bus to school with me, I wouldn't do it. I'd just, stop, I guess. Stop breathing, stop living."_

Stomping up the stairs, Patty opens up the door. "Angela, please, get up. You have to go to school. A broken heart isn't worth flunking school over, believe me."

Ever since last week, it's been the same ritual, every single day. Huffing, Angela turns her back on her mother. Walking up to the bed, Patty sits down next to her.

"Come on, honey. I know it hurts, I really do, but you can't spend the rest of your life in here." While stroking Angela's hair, Patty's heart breaks. It grieves her to see her eldest daughter in so much pain. "And what's that disgusting smell?"

"It's nothing! Leave me alone! And *don't* touch anything in my room, not the sheets or anything else."

_Angela VO: "Doesn't she get it? I don't wanna change a thing in here, 'cause it might change my memory.__"_

"You know, I think it'll be good to clean out your room. Wallowing in self-pity is allowed to some point, but you're causing most the pain yourself, by surrounding yourself with memories of Jordan."

"I like to wallow in self-pity, so just leave me alone. I'll come out when my heart stops breaking."

"You'll come out now, like every other morning. Honey, I wish there was some kind of medicine against being love-sick, but there isn't. Facing the world and being around friends is the only remedy for now."

"I don't want any remedy; I want to rest in piece."

"Come on Angela, you're starting to scare me. Get up, now, before I summon the police over here to drag you into school."

Grumbling, Angela stretches out. "I'm up, happy now?" Reluctantly, she slumps up. With a frowned face she slouches onto the hallway, to take a shower in the bathroom.

"It's a start, honey."

**[School hallways] **

_Angela VO: "__I keep expecting to see Jordan Catalano's car parked in its usual spot, just like I keep expecting to see him leaning against some wall or locker. Closing my eyes, the image of Jordan Catalano smiling shyly at me, appears; like he never left. I think that only now I fully understand why he used to close his eyes like, almost all the time. What's on the inside really *is* better. I wonder though if he pictured *me* inside his head, or maybe the life he's living now. I hope both, because I wish that I made him just as happy as the thought of a loving mother did."_

_Angela VO: "Like nothing has changed, life has taken its course again. The only thing that's like different; is that every morning I drag myself out of bed, after crying myself to sleep once more. Apart from that, it's like all the previous events never even happened. Rayanne isn't around 'cause she's in rehab, and every trace of Jordan Catalano's existence seems like, erased, or something. The only person still standing from my so-called new and improved life, is Rickie. Always around, no matter how life treats him. I guess I should follow his example, you know; like still being able to believe in fairytales after life__ has happened to you anyway. But I just can't." _

_Angela VO: "__God, it's like, my life is back to the way it always was. Or, back to what it never was, somehow. Sharon is still Sharon; chatting to everyone endlessly. Brian is still around, watching from a distance, but never really brave enough to participate. I guess when you bumped into trouble (for finding out things you never were supposed to) as many times as he has, that makes sense. He still hangs around me, like my personal, but clumsy guardian-angel, or something." _

_Angela VO: "So, basically my life is back to being one big monotonous experience again. I waited for my life to happen until Jordan Catalano came along and made it happen. By leaving, he undid all of it again. I wonder if he's as miserable as I am, left wondering if it was a dream. I hope he misses me like I miss him, even if that's selfish. It's not like I don't want him to be happy, of course I do." _

_Angela VO: "I just hope I made a difference in his life, you know. I hope one day he'll look back and say: "Angela Chase, she like, changed my life by loving me." Because for a brief moment in time, that's what Jordan Catalano did. He changed my so-called life into a genuine life, actually worth living."_

** The End**


End file.
